I already know. Some of y'all are like, "I know that drinking water is good for me. That doesn't mean I like it, so trying to convince me that I'm doing it wrong is asking for a lot." Sis, I hear you. It's not like drinking water is my favorite thing to do either. So much, in fact, that I oftentimes go with sparkling water with a splash of juice in it, just to get my daily quota in. Still, personal feelings don't change the fact that water consumption is oh so very necessary if you want to keep toxins out of your system, regulate your body temperature, keep your joints lubricated, produce saliva and lubrication, push oxygen throughout your organs, keep your skin healthy and so much more.
That's why it's not only important that you drink water but that you do it right. If you had absolutely no idea that there are a myriad of different ways to do it wrong, let me share 10 of 'em, along with how to correct these common mistakes—now.
1. Stop Drinking Bottled Water
Let's start with something that I'm thinking is a given, at this point (although I see A LOT of people do it so, maybe not). Bottled water—what I mean is water that comes from a plastic bottle—needs to be an absolute no-no. Aside from the fact that it is absolutely horrible for the environment (it's been reported that there will be somewhere around 30 million metric tons of plastic in the oceans, every year, by 2040), plastic oftentimes contains BPA (which is a synthetic compound known as bisphenol A) and other plastic toxins.
This can ultimately lead to all sorts of health-related issues including fertility problems, weight gain and even heart disease. Instead, you're much better off using a recyclable bottle. It lasts longer, there's no trash and it's so much better for your overall health and well-being.
2. Drink Less Cold Water
While I can certainly get down with the fact that drinking cold water can be really refreshing, when it's ice-cold, it actually isn't all that great for you in the long run. For one thing, if you heard somewhere that it boosts your metabolism, drinking cold water doesn't really do that any more than room temperature water does. Also, because it can restrict your blood vessels, cold water can make it harder to digest your food easily. Other challenges that it presents? It can decrease your heart rate, hinder your body from breaking down fat and even leave you constipated.
So yeah, water with a ton of ice in it isn't really the way to go. Room temperature water is your far better bet.
3. Leave the Lemon Slices Alone (When Eating Out)
If you're someone who's good for getting a couple of lemon slices in your water while you're out—yeah, you might wanna chill on that. There are many studies which indicate that as much as 70 percent of lemon slices have all kinds of nasty germs including bacteria, viruses and E. coli all over them. What about lemon slices at your crib? Well, that's an entirely different story.
If you drink it there, lemon water can help to detox your system, give you a boost of Vitamin C, freshen your breath, reduce your chances of getting kidney stones and even aid in your body's digestive process (especially if you have a glass, first thing in the morning). The reason why DIY lemon wedges are better is because you know what's going on with your knives, countertops and kitchens (and your hands). In restaurants? Not so much.
4. Use a Straw
If water isn't really one of your favorite things on the planet (again, I get it; I oftentimes say it's like drinking wet air) yet you want to amp up your water intake, try drinking it from a straw. Believe it or not, drinking liquid from a straw makes it easier to consume more of it. Hmph. Maybe that's why so many fast food joints want us to take as many straws as possible for those sodas, huh?
5. Have Some Water with Your Alcohol and Coffee
Two things that are diuretics are alcohol and coffee. This is why a lot of people can drink either (or both) and end up still being thirsty all of the time. If you check out the article, "10 Overlooked Signs That You're Dehydrated" on our site, you'll see several reasons why being dehydrated (75 percent of us are, by the way) is absolutely not a good look.
Yet what if you can't imagine a day without a glass of red wine or a couple of cups of java? At least balance things out a bit by following those with a glass of water. It can help to keep you hydrated. It can also reduce your chances of drinking more alcohol or coffee than you actually should.
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6. Drink a Full Glass with Your Vitamins or Medicine
Whether it's some sort of medicine that you've been prescribed or you're like me and you are all about getting some vitamins and supplements into your system on a daily basis, chase those down with a full glass of water. If you're concerned that doing this will flush out what you just took in, first, one glass shouldn't be able to rock any kind of boat. And, as far as vitamins and supplements are concerned, many of them are water-soluble which means that the water can actually help them to dissolve into your system easier/quicker.
7. Avoid Artificial Flavorings. Add Fruit Instead.
OK, so back to the wet air thing. There are plenty of products on the market that claim to make drinking water easier because they will add flavor to it. Uh-huh. What they don't tell you in the ads is all of the artificial flavors, colors and other chemicals that are in them too.
Water is supposed to free you of toxins, so it makes absolutely no sense to intentionally put things into it that will work against instead of for you. Your better bet would be to make some of your own infused water. Whatever fruits, veggies or herbs that you decide to go with will help to add nutrients to your water without all of the added fake drama.
8. Have a Couple of Glasses When You’re Tired
Question. What's the first food or drink that you reach for, whenever you are feeling completely worn out? If it's not water, chile, it should be. The truth is a sign of being dehydrated if feeling like your energy level is zapped. So, when you combat that with a glass or two of water, it can increase your brain functionality by as much as 14 percent. Since your brain is made up of around 80 percent water, that actually makes a lot of sense.
9. Know the Signs of When You’re Water Deprived
You might've heard somewhere before that if you wait until you're thirsty to drink water, you're already mildly dehydrated. And yes, there is a lot of truth in that. That's why it's smart to drink water throughout the day.
Just in case you're wondering what some not-so-obvious signs of water deprivation are, they include headaches, joint pain, dry skin, cravings for salty foods, stomach pain, dark urine and not urinating between 6-8 times a day (up to 10 if you're drinking water around the clock).
10. Drink Water at in the Morning Instead of at Night
To be honest with you, there isn't really a "bad" time of the day to drink water. However, if you've gotta choose, taking in 2-4 glasses, first thing in the morning is really wise. For one thing, waiting until nighttime could cause you to have to keep getting up and going to the bathroom. Also, consuming more in the morning is one of the best ways to kick your metabolism into high gear.
The reason why is because, when you're asleep, your metabolism slows down. So, when you drink water, it helps to get your metabolic processes going while aiding in burning fat in the process. Having some water in the morning is refreshing on some many levels. Tomorrow morning, why not give it a shot?
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Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at firstname.lastname@example.org. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
How We Met is a series where xoNecole talks love and relationships with real-life couples. We learn how they met, how like turned into love, and how they make their love work.
I’m willing to bet that this is not the first time you’ve seen this couple. Dalen Spratt is a television producer, owner of a tailored men's suit line, and creator of Ghost Brothers: Haunted Houseguests, which is currently streaming on Destination America. Stacey Spratt is also a serial entrepreneur, focusing mostly on events and the nonprofit world, and she is the owner of two award-winning craft beer bars called Harlem Hops. But their accolades are not what united them.
The couple met years ago at their alma mater, Clark Atlanta University, when they were still working to create the life they have now, and if you had told them then that they’d eventually tie the knot, the pair probably would’ve laughed in your face.
Today, they’re new parents, flourishing in their careers, and each others’ “teammates.” When desiring love, Dalen recommends not looking to other couples for advice. And Stacey advises staying true to what you want. “Don’t put age or limitations on love and children. If God could do it for me, why can’t he do it for you?”
Here's How We Met.
How did you meet?
Dalen: We met in 2005 when she was advising the Greek sororities and fraternities in college. She was old as hell in college, and I was a young buck (laughs). Everybody had a crush on her, but I didn’t think much of it. Then, in 2007, we were in the same grad school class, but she still wasn’t trying to see me then either. I had to catch her five years ago; I was very patient.
Stacey: Yeah, everybody in our grad school class called him Young, Fresh to Death because he was always dressed in B-school (what CAU affectionately refers to as business major classes), and we’d just wear sweatpants (laughs).
So, I know Dalen was always attracted to you. But what about you? Did your attraction to him develop over time?
Stacey: So 2006-2008 – all the years went by. I don’t think we were really thinking about each other at all back then. Years later, I had an event in Dallas, and I booked him to be a speaker. Then, a few years ago, Dalen posted a photo of him on Instagram, and I slid in his DMs. I remembered him being so young and handsome, and I’m like, I should hook him up with my younger cousin. His response was: "If you’re not hooking me up with you, no thank you." But I still thought he was too young at the time, and he started pulling receipts. Taraji P. Henson was dating someone young at the time, Gabrielle Union–
Dalen: First of all, I didn’t do that. You did that.
Stacey: Okay, I did. I thought he was a cutie pie, but that age thing was on my mind!
"Dalen posted a photo of him on Instagram, and I slid in his DMs. I remembered him being so young and handsome, and I’m like, I should hook him up with my younger cousin. His response was: 'If you’re not hooking me up with you, no thank you.'"
Talk to me about the first date. How did he change your mind?
Stacey: Our first date was at Tin Lizzy's in Atlanta. During that time, he was living in Dallas, so it was long-distance. But he came into town, and we just had a good time. We talked a lot, which we still do. It wasn’t anything fantastic.
Dalen: Don’t downplay our first date.
Then, walk me through your courtship. How did you get to the next level? What was that conversation like?
Stacey: I think he knew at age 43 or 44 I wasn’t playing around. But also, I think it just naturally progressed.
Dalen: Yeah, it just happened naturally. And I’m going to be honest, I don’t think initially either one of us thought it would be as serious as it was. She thought I was too young and I wasn’t ready for marriage, kids, and all that. I think we both thought we were just hanging out. But after spending so much time together, a lot of stuff started happening. Like, she had to have surgery early on. It wasn’t just time together; it was intimate time. Next thing we know, we just never left each other. That’s why we still don’t have an anniversary date because we never really asked.
"It wasn't just time together; it was intimate time. Next thing we know, we just never left each other. That's why we still don't have an anniversary date because we never really asked."
What made you want to commit to each other?
Dalen: The moment I knew Stacey was for me was from a phone call. I don’t really like talking on the phone, and I can be really blunt sometimes. But we were talking, and I said, ‘I don’t really feel like talking anymore.’ And she was just like, okay, and hung up. I wasn’t trying to be rude, and she understood that. It sounds bad, but that’s how I knew she just got me. I felt like she could get my random awkward moments, and she does to this day.
Stacey: For me, I liked him as a person. Even when times get rough and tough, I could still like him as a human. He is my best friend. We have time. We laugh until we cry, and it’s just always like that. Even when we get pissed at each other, something happens, and we fix it. Also, how he treats his mother. That’s a momma’s boy, but I’m a daddy’s girl – so I get it. I know how I want to be treated, and I see how he is with her and that’s beautiful.
What are some important lessons you’ve learned about yourself through loving your partner in this relationship?
Dalen: I grew up an only child and she grew up with siblings. So, when you have someone who is used to doing things by themselves, there is definitely a learning curve when you get into a serious relationship. It’s funny now, but it was definitely a process.
Stacey: I agree – definitely the only child thing. There’s times I look at him like, did you ever live with anyone else? That comes from being momma's baby, too. I have to say, my “mother-in-love” spoiled him. But also with Axel (their daughter), that brings another level of patience.
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What was the biggest challenge that you had to overcome together?
Dalen: We’ve gone through a lot within the years we’ve been together. We suffered two miscarriages – I’d say that’s the biggest.
Stacey: Having those miscarriages and trying to understand what’s next and what our options are was a lot. I had two myomectomies (fibroid surgeries), and he supported me through that time. Also, still, it was on my mind that he’s eight years younger than me. I was wondering if I can’t carry [a child] what that looks like for us. We had very real conversations pretty early in our relationship.
"Having those miscarriages and trying to understand what’s next and what our options are was a lot. I had two myomectomies (fibroid surgeries), and he supported me through that time. Also, still, it was on my mind that he’s eight years younger than me."
What do you fight the most about?
Dalen: Nagging. Stacey nags; she’s a complainer. She’s that momma that will look in a room and just hunt for something to complain about. Like, I’m worried for Axel when she's in high school.
Stacey: It’s because I like things to be in place. He leaves stuff all over the place. I can tell where he’s been in the house because something is left around. So he says I’m nagging – but it’s like, just get your stuff.
What are your love languages?
Dalen: Stacey is gifts all day.
Dalen: We’ve talked about this. xoNecole is about to cause problems in our home (laughs).
Stacey: Obviously I love you. *thinks again* It’s words of affirmation.
Dalen: That’s it.
What’s your favorite thing about each other?
Dalen: I’ve always respected her business-mindedness. That may sound superficial, but it’s not because I’ve never been with someone who thinks like me. It’s one of my most treasured things about her. I remember one day, I was just running through ideas with her, and each time Stacey had a suggestion on how I could make it better. It’s just very comforting. She takes whatever I’m doing and elevates it – including me.
Stacey: I love Dalen’s hustle and creativity. He’s been on multiple shows, and he continues to create, produce, and reinvent himself and the product he’s putting out. I love that we can create together and bounce things off each other. Even though we may be in different arenas, there’s nothing he can’t offer me great advice about. I love that drive.
Finally, how did you know it was love?
Dalen: Well – she said it – first. (laughs)
Stacey: And he looked at me and smiled! He didn’t say it back. We were on a trip, out of the country.
Dalen: We were arguing when she said it, and she just threw it out.
Stacey: But we continue to do that. We’ve spent holidays and everything outside of the country.
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Porsha Williams And Simon Guobadia’s Marriage Has Ended: Here’s A Look Into Their Relationship Timeline
Porsha Williams and Simon Guobadia have called it quits.
After a 15-month-long marriage commenced with two elaborate wedding ceremonies, PEOPLEexclusively reports that the former Real Housewives of Atlanta star has filed for divorce from the Nigerian businessman on Thursday.
With online rumors around Guobadia's citizenship status coinciding with the announcement of their separation, a source informed PEOPLE that the divorce is "unrelated to recent allegations involving Simon's past" and is an “ongoing matter.”
In November 2022, the ex-lovebirds tied the knot in Atlanta during a show-stopping, 350-guest Nigerian traditional native law, with a traditional American wedding to follow.
Ahead of their wedding, Williams told PEOPLEexclusively, “I am ridiculously excited. I am just so ready. I'm not even nervous. I know I'm marrying the love of my life, and it's going to solidify our relationship and our family bond. I'm calm and excited."
Although their relationship has come to a sudden conclusion, their whirlwind romance was one to watch; or in this case, look back on. Here’s a breakdown of the moments that made Williams and Guobadia’s relationship one to remember.
2020 - Porsha and Simon's First Encounter
Porsha Williams and Simon Guobadia first crossed paths in 2020 on the set of Season 13 of Real Housewives of Atlanta. Guobadia was then married to friend of the show, Falynn Pina.
May 2021 - Their Surprise Engagement
In May 2021, Porsha Williams surprised fans by announcing her engagement to Simon Guobadia shortly after he reportedly declared his divorce from Falynn Pina. Williams shared on Instagram that their relationship started a month earlier, and Guobadia had initiated divorce proceedings in January 2021, which had been resolved.
Williams took to Instagram to dispel rumors around the overlap in Guobadia’s prior relationship.
“Our relationship began a month ago—yes we are crazy in love,” she wrote in the caption. “I know it’s fast but we are living life each day to its fullest. I choose happiness every morning and every night. Tuning out all negative energy and only focused on positive wishes.”
November 2021 - Porsha Clears Up Rumors Around Their Relationship Timeline
On an episode of Watch What Happens Live, Andy Cohen looked to “nail down some dates” in connection to alleged overlaps with Porsha, Simon, and his ex-wife. She shared that she reached out to Guobadia to express her sympathy for his divorce, having experienced the weight of divorce herself.
“I actually told him, ‘I’m sorry for your divorce,’ and all of that because I know what that feels like,” Williams shared. “I know what it feels like to go through betrayal and hurt.”
She continued, "A little birdie had told me that [Falynn] was pregnant, so I knew what he was about to go through." Porsha noted that his ex-wife’s pregnancy announcement prompted her to offer support to Simon, which opened a door for their connection to deepen and eventually fall in love.
November 2022 - Williams and Guobadia Tie the Knot
The couple spared no expense for their not one, but two wedding ceremonies. On Nov. 26 and Nov. 27, the two celebrated their love in front of 350 wedding guests at the Four Seasons Hotel in Atlanta, GA. The first ceremony celebrated Guobadia's Edo culture, while the following day featured a star-studded American wedding. Williams told PEOPLE that the double-wedding was a "true fashion extravaganza," as a nod to her numerous outfit changes.
November 2023 - A Diamond-Studded Declaration
To celebrate their one-year anniversary, the couple exchanged extravagant dazzling diamond rings — a stunning emerald cut for her and a stylish band for him.
February 2024 - The Two File for Divorce
Williams filed for divorce from Guobadia on Thursday, Feb. 22 2024, after nearly a half of marriage. While the cause of their divorce is still unknown, sources close to Williams confirmed that the divorce is an “ongoing matter.”
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