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To Submit Or Not To Submit? That Is The Question.
What does it mean to be submissive?
It's a word that so many women have problems with and it's also a word that people take out of context all the time. Oftentimes, people quote scripture in Ephesians about wives submitting themselves unto their husbands and they take this and run with it. They seem to think that it means that the woman is beneath them, therefore when the husband says jump the wife should ask, "How high?" But this is NOT so!
Some women believe this too. In fact, I was one of those women and that's exactly why I bucked every time I thought my husband was "trying" to rule me. It wasn't long before my dilemma became: to submit or not to submit? That was the question.
What I didn't know at the time was that being submissive is all about having respect for your marriage, showing respect for your husband and your husband having respect for you, in all areas. Respect goes a long way, from respecting who he is as your husband, respecting his opinions and ideas, and respecting what he does for the marriage. God does handle things decently and in order, therefore he has set the marriage in divine order. The husband and wife have roles that they should step into.
Over the years, I've found that when it comes to this submissive thing, there are three different types of women. (I've personally been all three of these women in my marriage so if you feel like one of these categories fits you, I feel you, sis!)
The Doormat
This type of wife perceives the word submissive as: I'm the weaker vessel and my husband has the say-so in everything.
Yes, the bible does say that the wife is the weaker vessel but it doesn't mean she is not capable of making decisions and having her own mindset. This is where people get it twisted, and women start feeling as if they are beneath men and feel as though they will be looked down on so they must stay in their place. Marriage isn't a dictatorship!
Mrs. Too Independent
Mrs. Too Independent does things on her own and if her husband does try to step up and help, she quickly reminds him that she can do it on her own. This wife thinks if she lets the man do anything for her, that's opening the door for him to control her.
I was raised mostly by my grandparents, and my G-Ma always taught me to be independent. She always told me to never let a man rule me, never to let a man tell me what to do, and to never to let a man use me as a doormat. She also taught me that I can do things for myself and that women are just as good as men are. She used to always say that when a man starts doing things for you, he's going to think he rules you. I'm grateful for what she taught me about a woman being able to accomplish things just as men are able to, but I now know that a healthy marriage requires balance.
The Balance
It took me a while to get to this point. Early in my marriage, I was Mrs. Too Independent, and later, I went to the other extreme and became a doormat.
But to truly find balance in your marriage, it's going to take a lot of maturity and understanding of what your role is as a wife. Knowing your role as a wife in your marriage will help you understand so many things. When a woman gets to this point, she realizes that she is there to love her husband, respect her husband, to be there for her husband, and vice versa. No one is better than the other and both roles are equal in the marriage. As husband and wife, you are in the marriage together, so anything that life throws at you, you both face it with faith together. I found out that when you work together with your husband, things get easier than trying to do things by yourself, especially when you don't have to.
The divine order that God has set into place has placed the husband as the head of the home and marriage––that's where we get head of household from. Now, this doesn't mean that men should go around boasting and dictating! This is why it's so important to know your roles in the marriage so you can fulfill it in its capacity. Get a more in-depth look at knowing your roles.
Ladies, you can still be submissive and still have your independence.
You will not lose your voice, and you will forget who you are. Being submissive creates oneness in a marriage, which places you on one accord with one another. Remember when you are submissive, you are showing love and respect. Whatever category you find yourself in, remind yourself that marriage is a partnership, not a dictatorship and you need your husband and he needs you!
Learn more about what your role is as a wife and how knowing your role benefits your marriage in my bookIt Takes Two.
This article was originally posted on TamronLittle.com.
Featured image by Shutterstock.
Tamron can be best described as a millennial southern lady lving her best life as a cancer survivor! Tamron inspires the everyday woman through faith, lifestyle, and her passion for fashion! Her goal is to encourage women through her testimony while sharing her light and life as a working mom, and wife.
Wife • Mom • Influencer
This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
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Mariee Revere On Her History-Making Million-Dollar Sales And The Future Of MoonXCosmetics
If the name Mariee Revere sounds familiar, it's probably because you heard of her beauty and skincare brand, MoonXCosmetics, or you may have heard about her history-making achievement of making $1.8 million in less than eight minutes. But before starting her million-dollar brand, Mariee was just a teenager trying to cure her acne.
While she grew up in the skincare capital of the world, South Korea, Mariee didn't really experience breakouts until her senior year of high school. Like many people who get their first breakout, she didn't know what to do, and there weren't many products out there at that time. So she decided to experiment. What she didn't know was that what she came up with would ultimately be her ticket to success.
"When I graduated high school, I moved back to America, Georgia, and I ended up making, like, the oil, the Rose Galore oil, which is like the staple product of my brand. I don't know what made me make it, but I did, and it literally cleared my face up," she tells xoNecole in an exclusive interview.
"I end up selling it as a body oil first because, obviously, I'm 17, [and] don't have any background as an esthetician or anything like that. I just made a product that worked for me, but people bought it and was using it, and I reformulated it, and then it just stuck like with me."
While MoonXCosmetics is known for its facial products, it wants to expand to body care and home. It just released its new product, Moon-Gel body wash, and it's only up from there. As Mariee continues to grow the brand, it's more than likely that she will see more history-making moments. And so far she has.
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When asked if she feels pressure to obtain more of those milestones, she says yes and no. "I did $1.8 [million] again, and then I did $2 million but I feel like now, currently, I don't look at that as one of my goals anymore because [of] the headache and just everything that came with it, but I was thankful and blessed to have that milestone, but now I'm looking for more," she says.
"I want to say more reach than more like fast-paced sales. I do want that. Obviously, every girl wants that, but I do want to have a better overall reach for my brand because I did take two years off so I was able to learn, [and] study a lot of different things. See how things have changed from 2020 to now."
"I did $1.8 [million] again, and then I did $2 million but I feel like now, currently, I don't look at that as one of my goals anymore because [of] the headache and just everything that came with it, but I was thankful and blessed to have that milestone, but now I'm looking for more."
Another part of expanding for any company is hiring people. Finding the right person to help you can be a hassle, especially for business owners who are used to doing all the work themselves. Mariee can relate to this, and she touched on this topic in her documentaryThe Million Dollar Story. She recommends having someone be your "right-hand man" who you trust to handle the ins and outs of the company.
"I could say, definitely get, like a right-hand man to help you within the process because that really was what helped me. I never had a job. I literally was 18 now, being like, you know, the boss of over 30+ employees at one point in time, and I didn't know anything. I didn't know anything about no W-2s, no taxes, no clock in, clock out because all I [have] ever known was my brand," she explains.
"So I definitely partner with people who are very skewed and versed in those areas, and they helped me get through it. Even to this day, I still have my same person helping me with hiring, firing, [and] doing everything that I can right now because I'm still learning. But obviously people get jobs young, so they have way more experience than me, but still learning."
And though she is still learning, one thing she makes sure to stay on top of is being consistent. Consistency is what trips many people up when it comes to achieving goals, but Mariee says it's all about scheduling. Whether it's when to post on social media or email marketing, scheduling it out can make a world of difference. That same practice also works when planning out her future goals for the company.
"Right now, future goals would be to drop at least five more products before the end of the year. We always do outreach, where we do drives and all that, but definitely do way more this year, she says. "Then really dive into body [care], and then hopefully open up MoonXBody underneath MoonXCosmetics to let that branch out and be open and definitely get back consistent."
For more information, visit moonxco.com.
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