It's something about Christmas that I truly love. One of those things is trimming the Christmas tree! I mean – what's Christmas without a Christmas tree?!
I remember growing up, my great-grandmother made sure she put up our tree the day after Thanksgiving. She had a small tree but propped it on a wooden table, so from the window outside looking in, it literally looked about 6 ft tall (haha). The tree had colorful lights that blinked on and off to the sound of Christmas tunes, colorful ornaments that would break –if you held it to tight, and mad silver tinsel EVERYWHERE! On the wooden table around the tree, there would be more tinsel garland, baby Jesus in the manger, and other biblical figurines that she proudly displayed. Spray snow was placed around the window seals for a frosty look (that wouldn't later come off for nothing), more colorful lights, and electric candlesticks in just about every window in the front of the house. Not many gifts under the tree, but the VIBE of love and the season of giving was PRICELESS. Man, those were the good ol' days! But I digress.
I feel like the Christmas tree is the foundation of Christmas. Once it's up, and decorated beautifully, you get a sense of the MOST WONDERFUL time of the year! I'm not going to be giving out tips on how to achieve my great-grandmother's tree, but I will be dishing out 7 steps on how to decorate/trim your Christmas tree Vogue-style!
Choose A Theme.
To make styling your tree a little easier, I would suggest for you to come up with a theme. Maybe you love black and white and want to create a Chanel inspired Christmas tree. Whatever it is, DO IT! Make sure your theme is cohesive with the colors you choose. My theme for my tree this year is The Vogue Room-inspired. Yes, my actual business and brand! (Is that vain??) I wanted my Christmas tree to exude GLAM! I am loving blush/champagne tones, along with silver and a hint of gold. Therefore, I thought those would be the perfect colors to incorporate on the tree as well.
Set Up Your Tree.
I suggest you go with a flocked or colored (maybe white, or even silver) tree to achieve the super glam look. However, if you have a green Christmas tree, that will work too. Moreover, make sure you setup your tree and fluff the branches! I typically start to fluff at the bottom, and work my way up. I suggest you put on a good Christmas music playlist, for entertainment purposes and TAKE YOUR TIME! You should fluff one branch at a time, so your tree will look full!
Step 2a: If you don't have a pre-lit tree, after you fluff your branches out completely, add lights to your tree. I like to wrap the lights around the branches and in between the sprigs.
For Added GLAM:my tree is pre-lit, BUT because I'm extra, I added more lights for MORE TWINKLE and you should too!
Ebony Staten/The Vogue Room
Add Faux Fur Or Ribbon.
When I think of faux fur, immediately my mind says GLAM! Therefore, we are going to add faux fur, ribbon or whatever material you choose to wrap around your tree. You can use a few techniques below:
Faux Fur Method:
This can be done with faux fur garland, a faux fur rug (you can always cut it into rectangles), or if you want to save a few coins, you can use white dusters! Yes, you read it correctly, DUSTERS! Starting at the top, I placed the fur between the branches and went all the way around the tree. Therefore when I finished, it created a "spiral" look around the tree.
I do understand everyone may not want to use faux fur and if that's the case, you can use some old faithful ribbon. There are at least three ways to wrap ribbon around the tree:
- The Spiral: some people start at the top and wrap it around the tree like a maze or spiral.
- The Waterfall: start at the top on each side of the tree and create a cascading look, which causes a waterfall look.
- Random: I like to go with the "random" approach. I start at the top and simply tuck the ribbon in and out of the tree. Essentially, I do this all throughout the tree in different random sections with different ribbon lengths. Trust me, it's going to look good!
Add dusters as faux fur to complete this spiral look.
Ebony Staten/The Vogue Room
Add "Chic" Large Ornaments.
This step is pretty straightforward. Starting with the largest ornaments, place each ornament on the tree in different spots. I like to start at the top of the tree and work my way down (but whatever works best for you). Remember – try to put a decent amount of space between each ornament.
For Added GLAM: make sure your ornaments are SUPER chic. Hobby Lobby, Big Lots, and At Home stores are my top places to go to for nice glam ornaments. I normally select ornaments of varies sizes, shapes, textures, and of course, BLING!
These ornaments are from Hobby Lobby and if you look closely, they have added bling to them.
Ebony Staten/The Vogue Room
Add Florals & Sprays.
Besides getting very nice ornaments, this step has to be my favorite! Florals and sprays are a good way to add definition and dimension to your tree. These elements are great fillers that takes your tree from average to POPPIN'! There isn't a specific technique I use for this step. Once again, I like to get my sprays and florals from Hobby Lobby and At Home. They come in the form of glittery feathers, fluffy feathers, glittery sticks, antlers, etc. Simply, stick them in the tree and even on the garland. Make sure it's secured, and there you have it! The more sprays and florals, the better!
Ebony Staten/The Vogue Room
Ebony Staten/The Vogue Room
Add More "Blingy" Ornaments.
You thought I forgot about the rest of those cute ornaments – of course not! Evaluate your tree, take a step back, and see where you may have gaps and spaces that need to be filled. We want to add the rest of your medium to smaller size ornaments here. I like to place a variety of ornaments on the tree. For smaller sizes, I like to place them deeper inside the tree and some on the outside branches.
For Added Glam: The "blingy-er" the ornaments, the better! Glitter, disco balls, and sequins are just a few of my favorite types of ornaments to style with.
Top It Off With Something Visually Interesting.
Add something super interesting to the tree for VISUAL interest. Whether, it's between the branches or an over-the-top topper to set off your tree. You need something interesting that will seal the deal to your overall theme. In my case, I added a few Vogue pictures I had in frames on the wall to the tree. Because my tree is The Vogue Room-inspired, I thought these pictures would be visually interesting and would give my tree the right "pop" I was going for! Mission accomplished!
Ebony Staten/The Vogue Room
Ebony Staten/The Vogue Room
And there you have it! You have successfully decorated and styled your GLAM Christmas tree, in true VOGUE style! I hope this was helpful and let me know, how your Christmas Tree turn out on Instagram. Happy Holidays!!
Originally published on The Vogue Room.
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Let’s start at the beginning. How did you two meet?
Crystal: We have very different answers to that question. I first saw him at a screening where I was supporting fellow actors. But when I first met him in person, I actually walked up to him and introduced myself, told him how great he was at the screening, and gave him my card. But he never called. That was our first physical interaction. It was my way of telling him I thought he was attractive. Also, he was talking to a young lady, and I wasn’t sure what was going on there. They were really close. So I kinda stepped in and was like, ‘Sorry, did I interrupt?’ And once she said no, I just kept talking.
Alfred: Yeah, a lot was going on for me. As she said, we didn’t technically meet the first time, but I remember seeing her, and I loved her green eyes. I remember repeatedly asking my friends, ‘Who is the girl with the green eyes? Then when she came up to me at the actor workshop, I was like, “It’s the girl with the green eyes!’
Courtesy
Okay, now how did it progress? Did y'all start talking on the phone after that?
Crystal: He never called me. I just kept seeing him randomly. I mean he was everywhere – auditions, a barbecue, everywhere. Long story short: he had a girlfriend. But this particular time I saw him, he was with a group of known actors, and I noticed there was an attraction between him and a beautiful super, talented actress who is a friend of ours, and she was interested in how we knew each other – so I uncomfortably answered, ‘well he’s kinda stalking me.’ I made it so uncomfortable. Then I walked off. I was just trying to block that situation.
Down the line, he messaged me on Facebook, which is interesting because he had my number. But still, nothing really happened. Finally, I saw him on 14th Street in Manhattan one day, tapped him on the shoulder, I said ‘hi,’ and we organized a date.
Alfred: In other words, she sabotaged my situation that I may have had going on. You see how much of a good guy I was? So even though I found her attractive, I had to make sure I was playing my cards right. The barbecue situation was hilarious to me. Everybody else looked shocked, but I loved it. That was the first time I really started to focus on her. I think some people would’ve been offended, but it was such a prank, and I found it cool. I tried to call her over to me that day, but she didn't turn back around (laughs).
What was the first date like? Do you remember anything that stuck out?
Crystal: Well, I was living in Brooklyn at the time, and he was moving to Brooklyn from the Bronx. So we met in Williamsburg at a popular restaurant called Taku Taku, that’s no longer around. I’m very funny about time, and he was over an hour late. I was fuming and wondering if I was being stood up. But he kept answering my texts. By the time he got there, I was MAD.
Alfred: Just to let everyone know, before I was a full-time actor, I was sports director at the YMCA – with all the little children. And there was a random crisis in the building going on. You know I love the kids, so I had to take care of that! To all the guys out there, you gotta know your purpose comes first.
So there was a post-work crisis, late to the date vibe going on. How did the energy change?
Crystal: Well, I liked him, and I knew I really wanted to get to know him. I felt like the chaser. I had been super outspoken and gave him my card. Plus, I feel like everybody gets a pass. So, that was his.
Alfred: I don’t feel like she chased me, but she did let it be known that she was interested. However, my grandmother and my mother raised a southern gentleman, so you know, I had to handle that situation the right way at the time.
But yes, on our date, she was visibly upset at first. I was wondering if I was going to have to go to the bathroom and leave because she was giving me such an attitude. But then she warmed up when I explained what happened. After that, it was a lot of fun. I made her laugh, and it all worked out.
I don’t feel like she chased me, but she did let it be known that she was interested. However, my grandmother and my mother raised a southern gentleman, so you know, I had to handle that situation the right way at the time.
Beautiful. Now, talk to me about the courtship. How did the journey develop?
Crystal: Listen, I had the key in like 30 days.
Alfred: Okay, wait a minute. I have a reputation to protect (laughs). Let me defend myself again. So when I moved to Brooklyn, she, of course, was already familiar with the area and used to ride her bike around there for exercise. And I didn’t want to have her just riding around outside. If something happened, her father was going to look at me. So I gave her the key and said if I wasn’t there, she could still go inside. That was the reason - just being a gentleman (laughs).
So that feels like exclusivity. Did y'all have “the what are we talk,” or did it just happen naturally?
Crystal: No, we never had that conversation. Well, not like “Will you be my boyfriend?” Or “Will you be my girlfriend?” We just knew we were in love with each other. I was in my early twenties, and I remember I asked him if he knew what “143” meant and he said it back (laughs).
Alfred: I had to ask my kids at the YMCA what it meant.
Courtesy
As things developed, what challenges did you have to overcome together, and how do you think it affected your relationship?
Crystal: I grew up with a lot of siblings - and brothers. So I was very boyish. I was always used to doing certain things myself. And my father raised me to be very independent and to never rely on men for anything. But I had to learn to come back to myself as a woman and realize, hey, you have an actual physical man here. I had to learn to let him lead and guide.
Alfred: So again, I’m an actor, and I was moving to L.A. at the time. L.A. has some beautiful women but I also have a beautiful wife now, right? So the challenge, I think, for us was the things people said, ‘Well, girl, you know, he's going to be out there and it’s not gonna work.’ And I do think temptation plays a real important role in how the relationship is going to unfold. But I just started to live a bicoastal life. I was living in L.A. but spent more time in New York. So that was able to actually help us, and once we got serious - I moved.
Crystal: I have to add to that, I always said I would never do long distance. We really had to decide to make it work. I had a job that was remote so I could travel anywhere. We got to explore L.A. together, and it ended up being a blessing.
Alfred: And it turns out, living in L.A. wasn't for me. So you have to allow yourself room when you're in a relationship, and your partner gives you room to be – because we had an impasse. There was a night where we had a very real conversation about if we were going to break it off. But we decided to give it a shot. I'm of the mind that people make happen whatever they want to make happen. Everything else is an excuse. Distance is an excuse. It's not saying it's not going to be difficult, but anything worth having is worth fighting for. Me knowing what I wanted made it an easy choice.
I have to add to that, I always said I would never do long distance. We really had to decide to make it work. I had a job that was remote so I could travel anywhere. We got to explore L.A. together, and it ended up being a blessing.
What about day-to-day challenges? What do you typically argue about?
Crystal: Alfred grewup with a lot of women in his house, and he grew up in a way that wonderful West Indian women do things. Everything is in a certain place and done a certain way. I didn't necessarily grow up like that, although I do have West Indian roots. So he likes things structured. If anything is not where it needs to be or in the right place, that’s a conversation.
Alfred: Yeah, I'm a traditionalist, and I believe without order, chaos will ensue. I grew up in a household with West Indian women who were married for 50 and 60 years. And as a boy, I would be able to see them give my female cousins and aunts all these instructions about how to treat their husbands like I was at this university of relationships. I know at times I may seem like a very intense person to her, but I feel like I have very unique insight into why a lot of relationships falter. Some of it is systematic, particularly in our community. We just don't have things in order, and we weren't raised to be in successful relationships.
It’s interesting hearing how your backgrounds shaped different aspects of your relationship. I’m curious, what’s a focal shared value?
Alfred: I think one of the things that we’ve shared and actually impressed me a lot about Crystal was her view on family values. Not to be stereotypical, but she’s half Italian and half Jamaican – and both cultures are known to be big on that. Like during Christmas, we shop for everyone, even the little nephews. I’m always like why are we shopping for all these people? But secretly, I really like that because I come from a matriarch where my grandmother made clear that everything was God first and then family immediately after.
Finally, what do you love most about each other?
Crystal: I love how he loves me. But I also love who he is as a man, how structured he is, and how he tells me what’s best for me even when I don’t want to hear it.
Alfred: The reality is that she has the biggest heart that I’ve ever come into contact with in a romantic sense. I can be mad at her, and the second I see her in pain – I go to mush. It’s priceless. I don’t have children yet, but I understand how fathers melt when their little girl’s face melts. Plus, I’m an artist and a bit intense. You know how that goes. We have self-destructive tendencies sometimes. But I can honestly say that whenever you see me, I represent not only myself but my wife, my family, my mother, and my roots.
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