Condola Rashad.
A phenom, well on her way to surpassing her own accolades. An artistic powerhouse wearing many hats.
I personally met the magic of Condola after watching her portrayal of Shelby in Lifetime's adaptation of my all-time favorite movie, Steel Magnolias. I remember being so excited, that when the cast was announced, I researched everyone—primarily her, and Adepero Oduye, being that they were the two cast members considered "newcomers" to the culture.
Little did I know, Condola wasn't a newcomer at all—sis isn't new to any of this.
The Broadway culture knows her from her performances in Stick Fly, A Doll's House, and Romeo & Juliet, and TV audiences knows her as Kate Stacker on Showtime's Billions. But now, Rashad is redefining her craft and reintroducing herself as Dola, her visual storytelling, artistic alter-ego firing her music into the universe, and debuting her very personal EP, appropriately titled, Space Daughter.
Because we live in a world where seeing a full body of work isn't something we are privy to (unless Beyonce drops it), oftentimes, between the music, the creativity, and full conceptualized storytelling, at some point, these very bodies of work remove themselves from a category of EP, and crosses over into sufficient art.
And Dola is no different. She has, in fact, brilliantly figured out her lane by welcoming us to join her process of coming into herself. "I'm so grateful that I've had the impeccable fortune of having been a part of so many incredible productions and projects," she tells us. "But I'd definitely have to say finally revealing the musician that I've always been, through the journey of the Space Daughter EP, is at the top."
And ladies, this is a huge statement being as she has previously been nominated for four Tony Awards, and she's acted alongside the likes of giants such as Alfre Woodard, Queen Latifah, and oh yeah, her mother, Phylicia Rashad. "Music was and has always been my first artistic expression. It has always been the leading force behind me. It's just most people didn't know until I released Space Daughter earlier this year, which was exciting for me because I love to surprise people! I was in an indie rock band called Condola & the Stoop Kids for a few years; some of the best years of my life!" She continued, "But right around the time when I was in the Broadway production of Romeo and Juliet, we were recording our album simultaneously. I made the decision after we released that album that I needed to focus on one part of my path for a few years, so I focused on acting for about five years, and then when the timing felt right I went back into the studio in 2018 to start recording Space Daughter, my playful ode to the Divine Feminine."
Space Daughter features five vivid tracks: "Blue", "Give Up the Gold", "Running in Place", "What I Said", and "Too Fire".
Intrigued, I share with her that my favorite song on the EP is "Running in Place" due to its message and upbeat, fierce nature. She agrees and tells me that it's one of her favorite as well. We go on and continue to chat about the project. "After I created the five tracks with my team, I knew immediately that it was meant to be a visual EP. First and foremost, I'm a storyteller, so when I heard the songs together, I automatically saw how the visuals were meant to unfold.
"2019 was one of the biggest years of manifestation of my life. I gathered my soul tribe together and produced the visuals alongside a production company called The Colors You Like. We shot five videos in five days. It was one of the most challenging experiences to date, but I learned so much during that time. One of those things being how much I love producing and directing. I can't wait to produce more."
Enamored by her calm exuberance and regality in her responses, I ask her “what's next?"
She smiles, "Well if I told you, then how would I be able to surprise you?"
Spoken like a true Sagittarius.
Below are a few of my favorite stills from Space Daughter EP:
Space Daughter EP is available on all streaming platforms. Follow Dola on Instagram @dolabunny to keep up with her upcoming projects.
Feature and still images courtesy of Dola/WGM/YouTube
- Dola Releases Debut Visual EP 'Space Daughter' - Rated R&B ›
- Condola Rashad (@dolabunny) • Instagram photos and videos ›
- Check Out Condola 'Dola' Rashad in Her New Music Video for 'Blue ... ›
- Condola 'Dola' Rashad Premieres Video for New Track 'Too Fire ... ›
- Condola Rashad Discusses Her Debut Visual EP, Space Daughter ... ›
- Tony Nominee Condola Rashad Releases Music Video from Debut ... ›
- Condola 'Dola' Rashad Talks Visual EP 'SPACE DAUGHTER ... ›
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Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
___
Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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