
Writer Christine Michel Carter On Balancing Work & Raising Black Kids In Today's America

xoNecole's Moms Who Inspire series highlights modern day moms mastering all the tasks on their plate, from day to day responsibilities to ensuring their children are kind, educated and well-rounded human beings. Each mother describes their inspiration, what motherhood means to them, and how they maintain their sense of selves while being the superwoman we all know and love.
There's a writer, marketing strategist and mother who not only talks the talk, but walks the walk and she goes by the name Christine Michel Carter.
The Forbes, TIME, and Entrepreneur contributor has made a career of helping companies understand women just like her, black women and working moms. She's been called "the exec inspiring millennial moms" and her passion for mothers, black women and their children is sincere. Becoming a mother herself was always something she had envisioned for herself, but not something that was easily attainable.
Where some women seem to get pregnant on the first try, her own journey to motherhood was quite difficult. It took "rigorous planning, ovulation tracking, and intercourse scheduling"- but because of the relationship she had with her grandmother, aunts and uncles, she persisted and was blessed with two babies: Maya, 6 and West, 3.
She's a Mom Who Inspires us because she's willing to be a guardian and a champion for mothers and black women. Christine walks us through how her children inspire her professional life and how she became a thought leader for marketing to millennial consumers.
On her happiest memory as a first-time parent:
My happiest memory was the moment I felt like my daughter and I began to bond.
She was born prematurely and spent a month in the NICU.
And I found it hard to initially connect with her because she was surrounded by a glass case, tubes, and monitors. It only took a few days to get comfortable with those things but in mom time, that's a lifetime. When we both became comfortable with one another, having skin to skin contact and spending hours cuddling… it was the greatest feeling in the world.
On how her upbringing influenced her approach to motherhood:
I respect my mother; she is one of the most determined women I know. She had a goal of graduating college before I did, after postponing it for years. She actually exceeded her goal, receiving a bachelor's and two master's degrees. She's been a huge influence on my professional career and I consider her a role model and mentor. But my grandparents (specifically my grandmother) influence how I raise my children. Unlike my mother, my grandmother didn't work and because of that, I was able to spend a lot of time with her. She taught me that work isn't everything and your profession has no bearing on the impact someone can have on your life.
On a career-defining moment that tested her determination:
I remember when I was 20 years old: I was the director of marketing for a regional retailer and felt like my salary didn't align with my roles and responsibilities. I left the company and started my retail marketing firm, all the while scared I couldn't demand a higher consulting fee. I often worried if I ever returned to the corporate world, I'd never earn the salary I deserved because I was so young. I was full of doubt. Still, I took on a dozen clients as a consultant, fine tuning my professional skills and leveraging development tools. I eventually did return to the corporate world and made three times the amount I made when I left. From that experience, I learned my age is just a number, and it should have no bearing on the salary an employer offers me or the worth I put on my own professional skills.
On balancing work and home life:
I'm blessed to have a flexible schedule professionally, and this allows me to put what truly matters to me first: my children. I have the opportunity to attend more class parties and recitals than other mothers, and that's a blessing I recognize and do not take for granted. Also, my aunt is a fantastic support system for both my personal and professional life. She's there at a moment's notice if I need to work a little late or travel for business.
On the hidden life lesson she shares with her children:
Who's opinion matters? (Then I make my children point to themselves.) I find my daughter often taking the opinion of her teachers, her grandparents, and her friends to heart. Once she said she changed her favorite color because a boy's favorite color was blue. Comments like that are disheartening to me, especially because she is a young black girl and may have a lifetime of situations where her voice is silenced.
I constantly remind her only her opinion of her matters, and she has to feel confident in the decisions she makes because she's the one ultimately responsible for them.
On her favorite activity to do with her children:
I love taking my kids to the gym. They have their own separate area at the gym where they play, but I like showing them the importance of committing to a fitness routine and taking care of your body. This isn't something I grew up with and wish I'd started working out and being active at a younger age.
On the times she's scared to be a parent:
Whenever another black man is killed senselessly for having Skittles in his pocket, or for reading in his own car, a chill goes down my spine and my eyes water.
I'm raising a black man, public enemy number one.
Black men as young as 12 years old have been killed for no reason, and that fact makes me feel my son is never truly safe. Honestly, and unfortunately, I'm somewhat comforted by knowing there are other women feeling these same emotions, fighting across the country to show our children's lives matter.
On the three words representing her approach to motherhood:
Imperfection - I want my kids to understand I don't have all the answers and have done things (like all mothers) that I'm not proud of. Relatability - I'm not a "cool mom" but I'm not a "because I said so" mom either. Communication - Above all else, my kids know nothing is more important in my life than them and I think about them every moment of every day.
On how she practices self-care:
I can't live without going to the gym and running. Runner's high is real. I feel so inspired and awake after a good run on the treadmill.
On who inspires her to be a better mother:
My cousin Lindsey inspires me to become a better mother. She has so many professional and personal responsibilities, and I admire her more than she understands. She's my older cousin so she's always been #goals, but I'm amazed and inspired by how she's overcome obstacles in recent years.
For more Christine, follow her on Instagram.
- Black HuffPo Writer Shocked She Is Part White | The Daily Caller ›
- Inside the W.E.L.L. Summit: Meet Writer Christine Michel Carter ... ›
- Christine Michel Carter | LinkedIn ›
- Christine Michel Carter - Author Biography ›
- I Celebrated Black History Month… By Finding Out I Was White ... ›
- Christine Michel Carter | HuffPost ›
- Christine Michel Carter (@cmichelcarter) • Instagram photos and ... ›
- Christine Michel Carter (@cmichelcarter) | Twitter ›
- Christine Michel Carter – Award-winning global marketing strategist ... ›
- Christine Michel Carter - Christine's Forbes Site ›
Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
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I Tried It: 3 Low-Maintenance Wigs That Will Elevate Your Look This Season
There's nothing like the feeling you get when your hair is done. It can instantly boost your confidence and put you in a great mood. I've never been a stranger to hair trends and I often experiment with the latest braided styles and colors.
But there are moments when I just don't feel like doing my hair. I'm natural and a lot of times I will braid or twist my hair up and cover it with a scarf or turban. However, when I crave a different look without the hassle of styling, I reach for a wig.
I've always had a love-hate relationship with wigs. Sometimes, I struggle to get them to lay flat and don't get me started with the bonding glue process. So when it comes to wearing wigs, I like to keep it nice and breezy around this b--- (word to Katt Williams), especially in the summertime.
That's why I jumped at the chance to try these three versatile wigs from Luvme Hair. Each one offers a unique look and is surprisingly low maintenance, which aligns perfectly with my philosophy that wearing wigs should make life easier. Let’s dive into the three styles below.
Headband Wig
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This was the first wig I tried on, and I instantly fell in love with it. So much so that it took me weeks to even consider trying the other two. I’m partial to colored hair, especially blonds, browns, and reds, so I was skeptical about the jet black hair. However, I think the color, combined with the curl pattern, worked surprisingly well for me.
One of the things I really liked about this wig was that I didn’t have to braid my hair down first. I could simply throw it over a low ponytail, which is the epitome of a low-maintenance style. The headband has combs inside and velcro on the ends, ensuring a secure fit.
Half Wig
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I had never worn a half wig before, so I faced some challenges. I cornrowed the bottom half of my hair where the wig would sit, but I believe this made it more difficult to use the combs. It might just be me though. I straightened the top part of my hair to blend it with the wig, which looked cute for about five minutes.
Firstly, I have a brown/blonde color mix on the ends of my hair, and the half wig is black. So, I had to hide some of the color (I didn’t have time to dye the wig). Secondly, straightening my hair myself is always a hassle because it never lasts long. Add to that the summer humidity, and you get a hot mess. Despite all this, I managed to get some cute pictures before things got out of control, and that’s all that matters, right?
Would I consider this a low-maintenance hair style? Yes and no. I think it’s unrealistic for me during the summer, especially since I enjoy summer activities. However, when the weather cools down, I’ll definitely rock it, dyed, of course.
Bob
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Now, this is the wig I was nervous about. I never had a bob and I didn't think I would like it. But once I put bobiana on, my mind instantly changed. I finally understood why the gworls rave about the bob so much. It was giving boss. It was giving grown woman. It was giving the bob means business. Iykyk. It was the ultimate statement.
I will say when I first put it on, one side of my wig just would not lay flat. It took some trial and error, but I finally managed to get it to look good. With the bob, I highly recommend braiding your hair down first as small as you can so it can lay as flat as possible. I really liked the ash blonde color, which is perfect for summer. The length also makes it a great low-maintenance style for the season, so you don't have to worry about the hair making your neck sweaty.
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