Yeah, this one is about to be interesting. And let me just say this — since I know that the topic may be triggering for some of you, let me explain my thought process before we get into the thick of it all.
First, as a marriage life coach for many years now, let me just say that when it comes to who has confessed to committing infidelity (which can mean marital disloyalty or disloyalty, in general) more, at this point, it’s kind of neck and neck — if the wives don’t actually have a slight lead. Hmph, to tell you the truth, that’s why my eyebrow goes up (and sometimes my eyes roll as well) whenever I see the constant gender war topic of cheating coming up on social media — a part of me wonders if it’s the paranoia that comes from projecting more than anything else. After all, reportedly, 20 percent of men cheat, and 13 percent of women do yet let’s not overlook that the stats are based on how many have actually admitted to doing it before.
Second, as much as some of y’all wanna dog the Tubi app out, let me just say that for every 15 sucky movies, there are 4.5 good ones (LOL), especially in the indie section. One that I checked out a couple of years back is entitled28 Hotel Rooms. The gist is, it’s about two people who meet in — yep, you guessed it — 28 hotel rooms and share snippets of their lives over the course of a few years. At some point, they both are married. Throughout the entire film, things are complicated. It’s a cinematic reminder that asks the question, is cheating morally right? Telling someone you are going to do something and then not doing it never is. Cheating is not exempt. Yet is cheating as black and white as folks want it to be? Not by a country mile.
And third, rather than just say that cheating comes in shades of gray, I wanted to give some women who have experienced it firsthand to explain why. For the record, this isn’t about justification. It’s also not about seeking anyone’s approval. I just think that, again, as someone who works in the area of relationships, whether you’ve cheated, been cheated on, or are considering cheating, it’s important to look at the mindset behind it — one that is beyond something as simple as a person is “bad” or “selfish.” After all, since rarely does anyone ever plan to cheat…let’s look at 12 women (they picked a name to go by; pretty sure you can guess why they went that route) and how they found themselves in that type of, let’s go with, arduous dynamic. For some, it will bring clarity. For others, it will be a cautionary tale. Of that, I am sure.
(Heads up: I sought out women who physically cheated; emotional cheating is still cheating, yet it’s a beast of a totally different color. We’ll tackle that at another time.)
1. Irsula. 41. Married for 10 Years. Been Cheating for One.
Giphy“No one prepares you for how many changes you go through as a wife and that you have to go through it times two because your husband is too. Sometimes you can roll over in bed and feel like you’re in it with a complete stranger — and that they are feeling the same way. You can’t decide if you still love them or who you loved when you were someone different — and since the questions are all so complex, it’s not as simple as ‘just leave.’
"So, you stay and try and make it work, as best as you can, while still trying to get the needs that the ‘new you’ has…and that’s where another man can come in for me. ‘He’ fulfills who I am now. My husband satisfies who I once was and still am in some ways. I’m not saying that it’s right. I’m just explaining that infidelity can be really complex.”
"‘He’ fulfills who I am now. My husband satisfies who I once was and still am in some ways. I’m not saying that it’s right. I’m just explaining that infidelity can be really complex.”
2. Robin. 28. Engaged for Two Years. Been Cheating with Her Ex for Four Months.
“Since no one is going to know it’s me, I’ll just put it right on out there, okay? A lot of women cheat, and that’s why they’re always paranoid about their man doing it. And guess who a lot of them cheat with? Their ex. I love my man. He’s dragging his feet when it comes to setting a [wedding] date, and I’m sure that’s not helping things as far as my ex goes.
"But there’s also a chemistry between me and my ex that has never gone away. So, why not just marry him? Because chemistry is all we have. We wouldn’t be good partners or parents, but there is something about him that I haven’t found in anyone else — and so, until I’m officially a ‘Mrs.’, I see it as our last call.”
3. Lillian. 37. In a Committed Relationship for Three Years. Cheated During the First Year.
“My man knows about my cheating. It’s a long story, but the easiest way to explain is I didn’t think I deserved him. He loves me in a way that’s unfamiliar, and so I cheated with a guy, kind of like a backup plan, because I thought that eventually, he would leave. The guy wasn’t anything but sex, and it wasn’t even good sex.
"We started messing around a couple of months after my man and I made it official, and I didn’t tell my man until the second year of our relationship. He was hurt but not really shocked. He told me that he wished I’d love us enough to stop trying to ruin it. Because he didn’t leave, it changed my whole mindset about love and men.”
4. Mia. 29. Married for One Year. Cheated While Engaged.
Giphy“You know how they say that once you commit, men come out from everywhere? That’s basically what happened. A man from my past, who I had been looking for off and on since college, hit me up on my IG, and we started hanging out about three years into my engagement. My husband and I had been engaged for that long, and it kind of felt like marriage wasn’t going to happen. I’m not sure if it was more about not believing that my husband was serious about marrying me or [if] I wanted to see if something was still there with ole’ boy.
"What I will say is don’t play around with possibilities. Love ain’t a game of Spades. For the record, we had oral sex and not intercourse, and even that was only a couple of times. But the emotional ties? That’s what was really hard to get out of my system. I’m still doing it. My therapist knows all about it.”
"I’m not sure if it was more about not believing that my husband was serious about marrying me or [if] I wanted to see if something was still there with ole’ boy. What I will say is don’t play around with possibilities. Love ain’t a game of Spades."
5. Tonya. 33. Divorced for 10 Months. Because She Cheated.
“One side to being a virgin when you get married is a part of you always wonders if you missed out by not having sex with other people. At least, that’s my story. There’s nothing long or complicated about what happened. Sex with my husband seemed to have something missing. There was a guy I was really attracted to, and so we started having an affair. The sex was so good that I didn’t know how to keep matters separate, so I told my husband that I thought I was in love with someone else. He said that it was the love and not the sex that was a deal-breaker.
"What’s wild is now that I’m single, even though the guy and I still have sex, I realize that I was more caught up in how I felt during sex, not after. It was a hard lesson that cost me a lot. I’m not sure how much I regret it, but it’s not something that I would recommend — or repeat.”
6. Seraphina. 23. In a Committed Long-Distance Relationship. Currently Cheating.
“People say that long-distance relationships don’t work. I think it’s more like it can be difficult if you expect your partner not to cheat. I’m in the kind of relationship where my boyfriend doesn’t have as high of a sex drive as I do, and so, at least according to him, he can go several weeks without sex. I can’t.
"So, what I’m doing is more about sex maintenance than anything. And before y’all start, I don’t want to end my relationship. When I finish school, and my boyfriend and I can be in the same city, then this will end. Until then…”
7. Talia. 40. Married for 15 Years. Cheated Twice with an Ex While Married.
Giphy“You counsel married couples, right? Please tell people to get their sh-t with their exes cleared up before jumping a damn broom because that sh-t will catch up to you in ways that you would never imagine, especially if there have always been unresolved feelings. I think I read in one of your articles that you had to finally just stop speaking to your first love because the two of you were always trying to figure out a way to make it work. That’s me and my ex in a nutshell.
"He’s in a long-term situation, I’m married. There’s something between us. So yeah, we’ve hooked up a couple of times in my marriage. I’m not proud, but it’s not until you actually get married that you realize how long marriage is. And no, I don’t want to leave my husband. And yes, I am prepared that karma might kick my ass. If my husband cheated — or has already cheated — I wouldn’t leave him. One thing about cheating is it gives you grace for your partner because you see how easily it can happen.”
8. Xia. 37. Currently Single. Has Cheated in Every Relationship.
“Folks love to overanalyze other people. No offense, Shellie [Shellie here: none taken. LOL]. I came from a two-parent home. My parents are happily married. I was never abused or sexually assaulted. I don’t like porn. I think I’m attractive. Every guy I dated has been good to me. Hmm…what other reasons can people come up with for why I just don’t do commitment well? I’m the kind of person who doesn’t think that infidelity applies unless you’re actually engaged or married — but no, I have not been in a relationship where I haven’t slept with another person too.
"To be fair, I’ve only had three serious boyfriends in my life but…I think I just like variety. That’s why I’ve ‘cheated’ in every relationship and why I’ve resigned to just be single for the foreseeable future. Not really because [cheating] bothers me, but because I don’t want to hurt someone who might have a different value system than I do.”
"I’m the kind of person who doesn’t think that infidelity applies unless you’re actually engaged or married — but no, I have not been in a relationship where I haven’t slept with another person too."
9. Helen. 29. In a Committed Relationship for One Year. Currently Cheating.
“Remember how you once said to me that you think it’s wild that folks will defend casual sex all day long, and yet cheating is all of a sudden the worst thing that someone can do? That if we valued sex more, it should be applied across the board? I get what you mean. I just see ‘sex as sex’ whether I’m with someone or not.
"I didn’t really sign up to give my body only to my boyfriend — just my heart. He pretty much knows this about me, so although I haven’t told him that I have sex with someone else from time to time, men aren’t as stupid as some women say. I think he knows. Eventually, we’ll talk about it.”
10. Gaia. 34. Broken Engagement. Because She Cheated.
Giphy“Everything about my relationship with my fiancé was perfect — except for the sex. The mechanics of it were fine, it just wasn’t the kind of sex that I could see myself having for the rest of my life. I talked about it with my ex, especially after we got engaged, but it turned into hurt feelings on his part and resentment on mine.
"I cheated to see if it was a shallow situation; it wasn’t. Believe it or not, I broke off the engagement because, when I saw that sex could be more than what I was getting, I figured that I was overlooking some other real needs too.”
11. Olivia. 40. Engaged for Five Years. Currently Cheating.
“I’m not proud of what I’m doing, but I feel like I’m in between a rock and a hard place because my fiancé is someone I love, who isn’t rushing to get married, and the guy I’m cheating with is someone who fills all of the voids of my fiancé. I don’t wish this kind of situation on anyone, but I am thankful that you’re touching [on] this topic because it’s so easy for people to think that everything is black and white.‘
Just leave’ sounds real easy when feelings, families, and livelihoods aren’t involved. I don’t want to ‘just leave’ — I want more than what I’m getting is all.”
12. Dinah. 50. Married for 22 Years. Has Been Cheating Off and On the Entire Time.
“We’ve been together forever. We have children. When you have kids, and you care about your partner, no, it’s not as simple as just leaving. Sometimes cheating happens because you’re not unhappy, you’re just not totally satisfied. There are so many things that go into making a marriage work, and sometimes the stress of it all makes you want to get an escape.
"While I wouldn’t say that I’m in an ‘open marriage’ but I do see my choices as a way to make marriage easier to handle. Some people see a therapist to get through. Every couple of years or so, I’ll see…someone else. Oh, and it’s easy to cast judgment until you tell someone that you’ll have their back until you die. Personally, I don’t see how divorcing is more admirable than cheating is. Tell your readers I said that."
"While I wouldn’t say that I’m in an ‘open marriage’ but I do see my choices as a way to make marriage easier to handle."
____
There you have it: 12 women, 12 angles, 12 reasons to, yes, keep your standards wherever they are as far as infidelity goes. However, also realize that life can put you in some pretty complex situations if you’re so busy looking down on people that you don’t use their situations as teachable moments more than anything else.
I’ve been in this counseling game long enough to know that while I personally don’t condone cheating, I do have a level of compassion for people who are somehow (pardon the overuse of the next word) entangled in it — and have survived it.
Relationships have so many layers to them. For those who cheat, that is one of them. A very, yes, absolutely not black and white…one.
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Featured image by Prostock Studio/Getty Images
- Nazanin Mandi & Miguel Say Therapy And A One-Year Break Saved Their Relationship ›
- Here's What You Should Know About 'Micro-Cheating' ›
- You Want To Cheat On Your Husband. How To Fight The Urge. ›
- Ever Dreamt About Cheating? Here’s What It Could Really Mean ›
- Women Cheat More Than We Think. What To Do If That’s You. ›
RELATED
Whether you're planning to meet a certain financial or fitness goal, or you're simply trying to maintain and build on the progress you made this year, having something to look forward to is always a good look. Setting actual goals, according to research, actually leads to more success than just playing things by ear. So here are a few to get you started, sis:
(Disclaimer: Not everything is for everyone, so do like my Granny always says: "Eat the meat. Spit out the bone." Take on five out of the 40 and focus on that for the remainder of the year, or do them all. Either way, this is just to get you started.)
40 Ways To End The Year Strong and Inspired
Money Moves
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1. Increase your retirement (or other savings/investment) contributions by 1%.
Experts have found that you could be leaving money on the table by not upping your contributions when you can.
2. Cancel two to five subscriptions.
You could be missing hundreds, even thousands, of dollars a year due to sneaky price hikes and "updates."
3. Create a "fun" in a high-yield savings account.
This is especially important if you struggle with the dreaded b-word (budget) and will make next year's efforts a lot less intimidating. Even if it's $10 a month, do it.
4. Put on your big-girl panties, and set up automatic transfers and payments for at least one bill.
It reduces the stress of managing bills, lessens the chance of a missed payment---and the fees that come with that---and there can be cost savings for doing so.
5. Invest in a cleaner or housekeeping service.
Bosses who value their time (and mental health) invest their dollars into areas where the time they'd spend doing those tasks themselves could be better used to focus on other money-making projects. (And yes, rest is part of that.) Get a housekeeper, sis, or drop off that laundry, even if it's once per month.
6. Donate to a charity.
Beyond the tax benefits, it's a win-win for the greater good of communities you care about.
7. Review your insurance policies and negotiate a better rate (or move on) before their end dates.
Experts often agree this is a small but mighty step to take each year, especially since insurance rates are competitive, you could be spending more money than you need to (or not enough) and your insurance rates can affect your mortgage payments.
8. Call your loan provider and refinance.
As interest rates fall, “millions of borrowers may be able to refinance and get more affordable payments. As interest rates eased down to 6.5%, about 2.5 million borrowers could already refinance and save at least 75 basis points (0.75%) on their interest rate,” the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau reports. You can also refinance student and other types of loans.
9. Stop buying individual items and stock up via going bulk.
Research has found that, among 30 common products, buying in bulk could save you 27% compared with buying in lower quantities. Water, paper products, and baby products like diapers, toiletries, and garbage bags are the top items where people see the most cost-effectiveness. (This has been a lifesaver for me—children, large family, or not—especially when it comes to toothpaste, deodorant, toilet paper, and feminine hygiene products, saving stress, time, and money.)
10. Go cash-only for the holidays.
If you set smart goals and stick to limits on things like gifts, going out to eat, or groceries, you'll see the benefits of this. Cash-stuffing is one method recommended, but something as simple as taking a $10 bill out for lunch, disabling that card for an hour, and leaving your card in a safe place at the office can give you that mindset jump start to see how far you can take your money without the need to splurge.
Love And Romance
11. Say "no."
There are clear mental and physical health benefits to saying no including the setting of healthy boundaries, creating time and energy for other self-care activities, and protecting yourself from physically harmful situations (i.e. unprotected sex or abuse). Just say it, clearly and simply, when you need to.
12. Set a fun, free, adults-only date night for once a week or twice a month with your spouse.
If busy, high-profile folk have touted the success of this, even you can make the time for quality time with your partner. And it's even better when it costs nothing. The best connections are made doing something chill, challenging, or outside the usual dinner-and-a-movie date. Play a game that allows you to reconnect, take a walk in your neighborhood to chat and laugh, or try a little erotic chocolate/edible liquid/paint episode a la Mea Culpa.
13. Go out with Mr. or Ms. "Not My Type."
I love my man, but if I were waiting out for my "type" at the time, we wouldn't be celebrating seven (going on eight) years together. Sometimes having strict, unrealistic expectations for a spouse (especially related to things like height, physical features, or career path) is what's keeping you alone and lonely.
Take the pressure off and explore all your options. I'm not telling you to stop popping the balloon on the guy who earns $20,000 less than you if that's a hard no that Jesus himself told you to skip. I'm asking you to explore other options and see what else God might have out there for your love journey.
14. Immediately apologize and pray together.
I've learned that always being "right" isn't always ideal when you truly care about someone and you're in a relationship for the long haul. Defaulting to an apology when necessary, even when things aren't 100% resolved, is a good way to prioritize peace and save your energy for more worthwhile battles. Research has even supported the benefits of apologies in relationships, and how couples married for five or more years do it often.
15. Get a Rose and discover true self-love.
Do I really have to explain this? You've gotta know what satisfies you, and how better to figure that out than to practice self-love in the bed by yourself? You can also try this with a partner, but as a woman who got on this train very much later in my sexual activity journey. I have a lot more learning to do on my own, and even in a satisfying relationship, I like to find out new things about myself, by myself.
Figure out what you're into, watch what you want to watch, and read what you want to read to define pleasure for yourself. There's a freedom and empowering element there especially if you're used to prioritizing pleasing your partner.
16. Be direct and have the "money talk" with bae.
Money issues are one of the leading causes of divorce, so you need to have those conversations before you even think about marrying someone. And true, nobody can predict the future so you won't be able to avoid some challenges altogether, however, talking with your potential spouse about how they view money, their spending habits, and the pain points in terms of their approach to money management can at least give you a glimpse into what's in store if you do walk down the aisle, move in with them, or decide to share a bank account/business/child with them.
17. Invest in the "paid" version of that dating app.
I know plenty of successful, married folk who did this and met "the one" as a result. Let's be honest: The free version is for playing around. I had a lot of fun with my "free" profile back in the day, trust me. Upgrade that photo, profile, and package, and see if the quality of your dating adventures changes when you're serious about finding a true partner. Dating coaches and matchmakers cosign this.
18. Solo travel to meet that long-distance connection.
Sometimes, your perfect match isn't within 100 miles of you, and that's okay. Make it an adventure, enjoy the memories, and book that ticket. I met my man this way and it's been a whirlwind escape ever since. If you're not comfortable traveling solo, travel or (network to plan travel) with a group via Facebook.
Career And Business
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19. Schedule coffee or virtual meetups with smart people from your graduating class, previous employer, or current employer.
I have gotten many freelance opportunities by doing this. It's as simple as connecting and offering value (or simply learning how you can better equip yourself to do so.) It's also a great way to expand your network, spark new friendships, or find out about new job opportunities.
20. Invest in a well-made suit.
I don't care what industry you're in, a suit says "power," and it's not as old-school or out-of-style as you'd think. Plus the whole experience of looking for a new one (or getting one tailored) is fun and affirming. Try these options. I swear, anytime I wear a blazer, I'm treated like a celebrity or boss, especially when traveling. I was once upgraded to first-class wearing a yellow blazer outfit, and the airline professional literally said, "You look like somebody important. Here you go."
21. Volunteer for a worthwhile project or cause that's important to your company.
If you're overworked and underappreciated, skip this one, but if you truly have the time, love what you do, and want to advance, this move is clutch. Volunteering for extra projects got me where I am today in media because I had foresight, and knew that was the only way at the time to leverage relationships, and I was able to challenge myself to learn skills that 20 years later are still bankable. That VP you can't get a meeting with will be at that gala your company is planning, so join that committee, sis.
22. Write down why you deserve a raise and ask for it in your next one-on-one.
Gather those receipts (ie sales increase numbers, KPIs met, deals closed, people acquired via recruitment, the impact of systems updates, or other tangible success metrics) and ask for that raise before the first or second-quarter budgets are being finalized.
23. Instead of quitting, write down your exit plan.
While revenge quitting is set to be a thing next year (and maybe you're among those who will be leading the trend), try the better boss move and quit with a real plan.
24. Start automatically separating that estimated self-employed quarterly tax estimate.
If you have side hustles (or you're collecting 1099 income,) baby, you do not want to neglect those quarter tax payments. Talk to a professional, do your research, and set up automatic transfers to an account specifically for paying these at the appropriate due dates.
25. Sign up for a free one- to 11-week course related to your industry—or the industry you want to be in next year.
Institutions like Harvard University and platforms like Coursera offer free courses that can enhance your skills. You can also invest in certificate courses with accredited colleges as well as tech training.
26. Hit "Easy Apply" for 10 dream jobs listed on LinkedIn.
While you shouldn't solely rely on this when actively job-seeking, using this convenient LinkedIn option is a great way to get into the habit of applying for positions. And if you're already employed, you should still be "dating" other employers if you're looking to make a move in the next six months. Keep your interview skills sharp, practice toughening up for the "nos," and get a bit of an ego boost in the process.
Self-Care And Wellness
27. Pre-schedule three month's worth of massages.
Oftentimes this is cost-effective since some spas offer deals for multiple bookings. Also, it makes an act of self-care deliberate and important, not an option. When you get that reminder call, you'll know it's real.
28. Fire that therapist and try another one.
Cultural competency in mental health support is one major problem that can hinder Black women from even bothering with therapy. And who wants the added stress of spending multiple, paid sessions explaining why something is a microaggression? Cut the cord and move on to try someone else, either via a Black women therapists channel or recommendations from others.
29. Join a small group at church.
Bedside service ain't gonna cut it and neither is going to the usual Sunday service. Join a smaller group and upgrade your efforts to connect, network, and elevate spiritually. Even if virtually, take a step to dig a bit deeper with more targeted Bible study and discussions.
30. Say no, even to loved ones.
This is on here twice, for a reason. Saying no is the simplest, most powerful micro-action you can take today to make 2025 better. No explanations. No guilt. Say no.
31. Choose one "luxury" beauty product for skincare and stick to it.
This was trending big on social, especially for millennials hitting their 40s. There's just something so freeing about not giving in to every trend and sticking to the basics that work, especially when there are quality, healthy ingredients involved. Put those orders on auto-renew.
32. Sign up for a new sport or fitness class just for fun, not for results.
It's great to be on a weight-loss or weight-lifting journey, but try something just for the fun of it. Switch things up with a couple of these fitness activities.
33. Book a staycation.
Leave the passport at home and explore a nearby community or another town in your state. There's so much enrichment in your own backyard right here in the U.S., and you don't even have to break the bank.
34. Pre-schedule your mammograms, Pap smear, and peri-menopause checkups for next year.
Take control of your health by pre-scheduling essential appointments like mammograms, Pap smears, and peri-menopause check-ups for 2025. Prioritizing these screenings early ensures you stay on top of your wellness and make time for self-care in the new year.
35. Cut off support of beauty and wellness professionals whose customer service is below standard.
This is another one that many Black women have been vocal about—from unrealistic pre-appointment requirements, to booking fees, to long waits, to unsavory in-salon experiences. Spot the red flags early, and just stop accommodating foolishness. Support salons or experienced stylists who are kind, have proper systems in place and value your time.
36. Schedule five to 10-minute moments of silence on your calendar.
Again, wellness is not optional, and if it's not on my calendar, it's not official. Sit quietly. Pray. Meditate. Or do nothing. The benefits of silent moments are almost endless.
37. Download a meditation app.
If you've found that meditation is difficult to schedule or to even start, an app can help. Try this, this, or this one, and take that step to embrace something new to enhance your wellness routine. If you're tired of downloading apps, create a playlist for meditation via Amazon Music or Spotify and schedule a reminder to do it once a day or week.
38. Invest in a healthy meal prep or delivery service.
Time is emotionally expensive, so save as much of it as possible. Getting into meal prep to keep to your goals is a great way to save time, stress, and effort. The health benefits of meal prepping have also been proven via research.
39. Create a positive playlist on Spotify, Amazon Music, YouTube, or other streaming platform.
It can be podcasts, music, affirmations, or somatic sounds. It's a game-changer. You can even set an alarm to wake you up to start your day with the positive playlist. Not into creating your own? There are plenty to choose from with a quick search.
40. Set up reminders for Alexa (Siri or other AI) to remind you, "You are loved," and "You are okay."
This simple effort can boost your endorphins and remind you that you're indeed, not alone, and you will be okay, regardless. To set mine up, I simply commanded, "Alexa, remind me everyday 'Jesus loves me,'" and like clockwork she does. She almost scared the ish out of me one day when I'd forgotten the reminder was active, but it was the reminder I needed when anxiety had gotten the best of me that week.
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Here's a roundup of holiday hair and glam ideas tailored for Black women, focusing on elegance, versatility, and creativity. Each style embraces natural textures, protective styling, and statement-making glam.
Holiday Hairstyle Ideas:
- Natural Hair: Embrace your natural curls, coils, and kinks with festive updos, twist-outs, braid-outs, or wash-and-go styles adorned with jeweled hair accessories, metallic headbands, or shimmering hair tinsel.
- Protective Styles: Opt for stylish and low-maintenance options like box braids, cornrows, Senegalese twists, faux locs, or crochet braids, incorporating festive elements like colored hair extensions, metallic cuffs, or decorative beads.
- Wigs & Weaves: Experiment with versatile and glamorous wigs and weaves in various textures, lengths, and colors, adding holiday flair with curls, waves, sleek styles, or statement-making hair accessories.
Holiday Glam Makeup Tips:
- Bold Lips: Make a statement with vibrant red, berry, or metallic lipstick shades that complement your skin tone and outfit.a
- Shimmering Eyes: Enhance your eyes with shimmering eyeshadows, metallic eyeliner, or glitter accents for a festive glow.
- Flawless Skin: Achieve a radiant complexion with a flawless foundation, subtle contouring, and a touch of highlighter.
- Statement Lashes: Accentuate your eyes with dramatic false lashes or a generous coat of mascara for added allure.
These suggestions are a starting point for your holiday hair and beauty journey. Feel free to personalize each look, experiment with different techniques, and express your unique style. The most important thing is to have fun and celebrate the magic that is you!
1. Stacked Bantu Knots
Raimonda Kulikauskiene/Getty Images
Hair:
- Bantu knots with loose, defined curls framing the face.
- Add gold or metallic hair cuffs for festive flair.
Glam:
- Glittery gold or copper eyeshadow.
- Bold red lip for a classic holiday vibe.
2. Sleek and Sophisticated
Ryan Destiny
Getty Images
Hair:
- Straight middle part or side part with layered waves and a high-gloss finish.
- Optional: Add crystal hair pins for extra sparkle.
Glam:
- Cat-eye liner paired with nude glossy lips.
- Soft bronzed cheeks for a warm glow.
3. Holiday Halo
Ciara
Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images
Hair:
- A textured halo braid with faux locs or braiding hair for volume.
- Decorate with small ornaments or pearls for a whimsical touch.
Glam:
- Smokey eye with silver shimmer accents.
- Dark berry lipstick for a bold statement.
4. Textured Top Knot
Ari Lennox
Gilbert Carrasquillo/Getty Images
Hair:
- High knot with natural texture or extensions for volume.
- Wrap the base with a velvet ribbon or festive scarf.
Glam:
- Metallic lids in emerald or sapphire shades.
- Subtle highlighter on cheekbones and nose.
5. Hollywood Waves
Jodie Turner-Smith
Amy Sussman/Getty Images
Hair:
- Classic finger waves or soft, voluminous curls for a vintage look.
- Use clip-ins or bundles for added length and fullness.
Glam:
- Winged eyeliner with lashes for drama.
- Crimson lipstick for timeless elegance.
6. Braided Beauty
Rihanna
Samir Hussein/WireImage
Hair:
- Fulani-inspired braids with gold beads or strings.
- Finish with a low bun or leave braids flowing.
Glam:
- Shimmery eyeshadow in gold or bronze.
- Glossy lips with a hint of sparkle.
7. Afro Chic
AJ Odudu
JB Lacroix/WireImage
Hair:
- Fluffed-out afro with metallic accessories.
- Secure with a decorative headband.
Glam:
- Dewy skin with a subtle blush.
- A soft pink lip for contrast.
8. Retro Glam Ponytail
Tia Mowry
Anna Webber/Getty Images
Hair:
- Sleek, high ponytail with flipped ends or added curls.
- Wrap the ponytail base with rhinestones or silk.
Glam:
- Bold eyeliner with graphic shapes.
- Matte lips in a deep plum shade.
9. Goddess Locs
Meagan Good
Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images
Hair:
- Bohemian-inspired locs with curly ends.
- Add holiday sparkle with silver or gold accents.
Glam:
- Bronzed eye makeup with a glossy finish.
- Warm nude lipstick with overlined edges.
Hair:
- Stranded twists styled into an intricate updo or bun.
- Secure with jeweled pins or barrettes.
Glam:
- Rose gold eyeshadow with natural lashes.
- Soft mauve lipstick for a delicate finish.
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Featured image by Getty Images