Taraji Is Providing A Healing Outlet For Us All With Her New Mental Health Show
Mental health has been on Taraji P. Henson's emergency radar lately, as she has been using her platform to take the stigma head-on. She's taking a moment to live where mental health resides, and she is not even close to slowing down, as sis is on a mission to normalize the importance of unpacking our trauma and leaning into our true toxic-less selves.
And she's done so everywhere she goes.
After all, she had shifted her brand to educating the black community on learning to lean into their true selves, inspiring her to tackle mental illness advocacy off-screen. In 2018, she launched The Boris Lawrence Foundation, a mental health nonprofit in honor of her father, Vietnam War veteran Boris Lawrence Henson, who himself, suffered from his own mental health challenges.
But Henson wasn't done yet.
After splitting with fiance, Kelvin Hayden, Henson had a breakthrough. She told The Breakfast Club:
"I haven't said it yet, but it didn't work out. And I tried. I said therapy. Let's do the therapy thing. But if you're both not on the same page with that, then you feel like you're taking it on yourself. and that's not fair position for anybody to play in a relationship. You have to still stand up for yourself and be there for yourself. And that's hard to do if the other person isn't doing their part either. That's why relationships are so difficult. They're difficult."
So, the only thing left for Taraji to do, was to talk about it.
Taraji loaded up her Emmys and grabbed entrepreneur, Tracie Jade Jenkins, and together, they decided to shine a bright light on mental health in a new Facebook Watch show, Peace of Mind with Taraji. The show airs new episodes every Monday and Wednesday, and will feature Henson and Jenkins interviewing celebrities such as Gabrielle Union, Mary J. Blige and Jay Pharaoh, licensed therapists, and everyday people, discussing a variety of wellness topics--meaning, sis took her anxiety and depression, and flipped it into a safe space for the culture.
Tamar Braxton was a recent guest on the show and, as most of us know, she was a perfect topic to divulge into due to her tough year (Braxton tried to commit suicide in July). Braxton opened up about her suicide attempt and began discussing what was going through her mind prior to the act, causing her to break down in tears.
It was then that Taraji said:
"Earlier this year Tamar's mental health struggles made headlines, but we wanted to offer her a safe space to tell HER side of the story."
She continued:
"I love that she felt safe enough to come here with us. Because anyone that comes here, they are safe. I'm not some celebrity that just slap my name on this talk show. I am literally struggling myself."
And this is the point of this show: to have the open dialogue, to start the conversation. Peace of Mind with Taraji will be another outlet for Henson to raise awareness and change the narrative around mental illness in the Black community. And Taraji is thrilled to step up to the plate.
"Therapy is important because you need and objective opinion. [Talking to] your friends ain't it, baby. It ain't it. Because guess what: your friends are traumatized too, and all they're doing is projecting their trauma onto you."
Whew, #wigadjust
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Feature image screenshot via Facebook Watch
Charmin Michelle is a southern native and creative spirit who works as a content marketer and events manager in Chicago. She enjoys traveling, #SummertimeChi, and the journey of mastering womanhood. Connect with her on Instagram @charminmichelle.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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When discussing the topic of raising children, discipline is often the first thing that comes to mind. Children need discipline. Full stop. But what is discipline? And how do we draw the line between discipline and revenge?
The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:
Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
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Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
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Featured image by Courtney Hale/Getty Images