Fellas, how y'all feeling? Ladies, y'all alright?
I don't know who needs to hear this, but it's time to break some generational curses when it comes to inherited pain. A woman's first love is her father and that relationship can set the tone for the rest of the male-female relationships she develops in her life, which can be a blessing… and a curse.
Guys are encouraged to be the type of men that they would want their daughters to date, but if a few men could keep it all the way 1000, if your baby girl brought you home a YOU, it would be sorry to this man. You would have to see him to the door. It's about time that we confront the fact that how we behave in romantic relationships has a direct correlation with how our children both perceive and receive love and LeToya Luckett knows this firsthand.
In a recent episode of OWN's Black Love Doc, the singer opened up about how she had to learn to forgive her father before she could heal and ultimately find the love of her life. LeToya, who is now a happily married mother-of-one, opened up about how infidelity and her first real heartbreak led her to have an uncomfortable conversation with her father. She explained:
LeToya Leaned on Her Father After Her First Heartbreak | Black Love | Oprah Winfrey Networkyoutu.be
"When I did get my heartbroken, I went up to his job and I said, 'I need to have a conversation with you' because this was the first time that I been cheated on and I knew he had done that to my mom."
LeToya explained that while there were no right answers to her questions, she needed answers nonetheless, even if the truth was hard to hear. She continued:
"So in my mind, I wanted to know, what a man thinks or what a person has to think to be able to do that to somebody else. So I'm going to talk to the person who introduced this to me into my life. So he took off work. And I said, 'Explain cheating to me. Explain how I'm supposed to get over this heartbreak. Explain to me why this person had to lie to me this whole time and was able to look me in my face. I wanna know.' And I think having that conversation with my father gave me healing."
LeToya, who welcomed her first child into the world in February of this year, said that she gained a greater understanding of her father that day, and not just as a dad, but as a man:
"I saw him not as just the parent hero, I saw him as a real person with flaws."
LeToya's somewhat uncomfortable conversation is a potent reminder that history will always repeat itself if we don't really understand and learn from it the first time it shows up in our lives.
Featured image by Instagram/@letoyaluckett.