How To Cope When You're In Debt
Let's face it: Debt is a common part of the personal finance reality for millions of people in the U.S., and it's something, as Black women, we often struggle with. It can keep you up at night, lead to that final step to start a side hustle, or simply serve as a reminder of an option that facilitated your journey to live your best life.
Whatever your reason is for being in debt (or owing a balance to any entity or person), you can be empowered and find solutions for how to cope with debt. Try these steps in order to get a handle on things and gain balance:
Step away from the guilt, shame and fear.
Oftentimes, there's an element of fear and shame when it comes to facing debt. You might feel overwhelmed just by the mere thought of owing anybody money. It might even contribute to depression and anxiety. This is why an important first step is to deal with the feelings of shame, talk with a professional (find free resources here) and find ways to overcome those feelings in order to focus more on a plan of action.
Also, remember that you're not defined by debt and that you're a beautiful human being who simply happens to have debt. It's not the end of the world and it doesn't diminish the amazing person you are. Your life and mental wellness are priceless and should be celebrated and protected.
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Honestly evaluate your income and budget.
If you don't have a budget, now's a good time to create one, even while in debt. When you have a budget, you get to know exactly how much money you're earning, how much you're spending, and what your bills truly are. This is the perfect opportunity to get honest about your money flow (even if you're unemployed or underemployed) and a great time to find out what your options are in terms of a plan to pay down debt. And make technology your friend. There are several budgeting tools and apps that will do all the hard work for you when it comes to tracking your expenses and money flow.
Be sure to take a realistic approach to budgeting, including recognizing what you're willing to give up, cut back on, or not. Getting help with this is also a good idea if budgeting is something that overwhelms you or is something you struggle with, and there are nonprofits and orgs such as Greenpath to look to for options in debt management.
Contact your creditors and explore your options.
Bills like those with medical institutions or hospitals can oftentimes be negotiated, down to the final sum due. You can also discuss your options with credit card companies and explore your payment options based on "hardship" programs. It can be a huge relief when you know you have options and everything isn't all doom and gloom. Oftentimes, you can get a handle on debt simply by talking with the party you owe, asking lots of questions about what your options are, and even making an offer that's more beneficial for you (i.e. settling the debt for a lower lump sum, forgiving late fees, or forgiving the loan altogether.) You can find empowerment by negotiating, even for conditions or amendments, that you didn't believe to be possible simply because you were so focused on worrying about the debt.
Celebrate the wins, big or small.
Whether you paid off a $200 debt or are much closer to finally paying off that $20,000 student loan, celebrate it. Don't let it just pass by as if it's a blip on the personal finance radar. It's good to treat yourself and focus on the good in the journey. Experts recommend doing this so that you can have something positive to focus on while you're going through a debt-management journey that challenges you. You can find small and affordable ways to do this. Include your support system and enjoy the company of family, friends, or bae.
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Explore other options for income generation or downsizing.
While you may not want to add on the stress of a second job or side hustle, it might be a good idea to look for other options to bring more money in. Explore the return on time investment and really tap into why getting a second gig, applying for a higher-paying job, or asking your company for a raise might be the best option, especially if you're trying to avoid continued interest expenses and just knock the debt out as soon as you can. You'll have to become super-deliberate about how you're spending your time and ways you can bring in more income in order to pay down the debt.
If you can move in with a family member, take on a roommate or tenant, or try a weekend gig in which the salary or income goes totally toward cutting down debt, it might be a worthwhile sacrifice in the long run.
Whatever reducing debt can mean for you, peace of mind is priceless. Finding strategies or realistic ways to reduce debt is both reasonable and doable. With a bit of planning and determination, you can do it, sis. Remain encouraged and try the tips above to take your life back.
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This Black Woman-Owned Creative Agency Shows Us The Art Of Rebranding
Rebranding is an intricate process and very important to the success of businesses that want to change. However, before a business owner makes this decision, they should determine whether it's a rebrand or an evolution.
That's where people like Lola Adewuya come in. Lola is the founder and CEO of The Brand Doula, a brand development studio with a multidisciplinary approach to branding, social media, marketing, and design.
While an evolution is a natural progression that happens as businesses grow, a rebrand is a total change. Lola tells xoNecole, "A total rebrand is necessary when a business’s current reputation/what it’s known for is at odds with the business’s vision or direction.
"For example, if you’ve fundamentally changed what your product is and does, it’s likely that your brand is out of alignment with the business. Or, if you find your company is developing a reputation that doesn’t serve it, it might be time to pump the brakes and figure out what needs to change.
She continues, "Sometimes you’ll see companies (especially startups) announce a name change that comes with updated messaging, visuals, etc. That usually means their vision has changed or expanded, and their previous branding was too narrow/couldn’t encompass everything they planned to do."
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The Brand Doula was born in 2019, and its focus is on putting "the experiences, goals, and needs of women of color founders first," as well as brands with "culture-shifting missions."
According to Lola, culture-shifting is "the act of influencing dominant behavior, beliefs, or experiences in a community or group (ideally, for the better)."
"At The Brand Doula, we work with companies and leaders that set out to challenge the status quo in their industries and communities. They’re here to make an impact that sends ripples across the market," she says.
"We help the problem solvers of the world — the ones who aren't satisfied with 'this is how it's always been' and instead ask 'how could this be better?' Our clients build for impact, reimagining tools, systems, and ways of living to move cultures forward."
The Brand Doula has worked with many brands, including Too Collective, to assist with their collaboration with Selena Gomez's Rare Beauty and Balanced Black Girl for a "refresh," aka rebrand. For businesses looking to rebrand, Lola shares four essential steps.
1. Do an audit of your current brand experience — what’s still relevant and what needs to change? Reflect on why you’re doing the rebrand in the first place and what success would look like after relaunching.
2. Tackle the overall strategy first — before you start redesigning logos and websites, align on a new vision for your brand. How do you want your company to be positioned moving forward? Has your audience changed at all? Will your company have a fresh personality and voice?
3. Bring your audience along the journey — there’s no need to move in secret. Inviting your current audience into the journey can actually help them feel more connected to and invested in your story, enough to stick around as changes are being made.
4. Keep business moving — one of my biggest pet peeves is when companies take down their websites as soon as they have the idea to rebrand, then have a Coming Soon page up for months! You lose a lot of momentum and interest by doing that. If you’re still in business and generating income, continue to operate while you work on your rebrand behind the scenes. You don’t want to cut existing customers off out of the blue, and you also don’t want so much downtime that folks forget your business exists or start looking for other solutions.
While determining whether the rebrand was successful may take a few months, Lola says a clear sign that it is unsuccessful is negative feedback from your target audience. "Customers are typically more vocal about what they don’t like more than what they do like," she says.
But some good signs to look out for are improvements in engagement with your marketing, positive reviews, press and increase in retention, and overall feeling aligned with the new branding.
For more information about Lola and The Brand Doula, visit her website, thebranddoula.com.
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50 Cent Is Celibate And Might Be Open To Marriage In The Future
50 Cent wears many hats. He's a rapper, actor, executive producer of the very successful Power franchise, author, and father. With such a hectic lifestyle, the "21 Questions" artist has also decided to vow celibacy. He first revealed that he was celibate in a New Year's post in January.
"My new idea is so big, I don’t have time to be distracted I’m practicing abstinence, I have been meditating and focusing on my goals. I hope this New Year helps you excel to the next level," he wrote.
And he elaborated on his decision during his recent visit to The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. "Listen, when you calm down you can focus," the 49-year-old mogul said. "I've been good to me."
He also explained how his financial status can complicate things and being celibate helps him see things clearer.
"[Money is] when things start getting complicated, things start getting confusing cause people come in for different reasons," he said. "If you go on a date but you have no interest in anything, I can see you now. I said, ‘God damn, girl, you fine, but you ain’t got nothing going on."
When Stephen asked if The Accomplice author has ever been married, he responded with, "I am safe. I’m not a happy hostage. I’m here. I’m free. I made some mistakes, just not that one."
Later on in the interview, 50 clarified that he still wants a romantic relationship and possible marriage down the line, but that's not his focus at the moment. "I want someone I can love in my life too, just not right now. I’m fine."
50 has had a lot of high-profile relationships, from Vivica A. Fox to Ciara. Here's a look back at his relationships below.
Shaniqua Tompkins
Before 50 became famous, he was dating Shaniqua Tompkins and they share a child, 27-year-old Marquise Jackson. For years, the former couple have been involved in a back-and-forth over their son and eventually, the rapper's relationship with Marquise turned sour.
Meagan Good
Meagan Good confirmed in a Hollywood Unlock interview that she and the Queens-bred rapper did date in the past. They reportedly dated from 2002 to 2003, and she starred in his music video for "21 Questions."
“Just to bring clarity on that, that was over a decade ago, and it was for about a year. … I kept it under the radar intentionally because…at that time in my career, I’d just come off of Biker Boyz, I’d just done the music video, and my career was going in a really great way," she explained. "And what I didn’t want was my connection to him to be the catalyst in any type of success that I had."
Vivica A. Fox
Photo by KMazur/WireImage
50's relationship with Vivica A. Fox might be his most memorable one yet. After publicly complimenting her on her dress at the 2003 BET Awards, they showed up at the MTV VMAs together later that year. Their love affair was brief, but their public feud lasted years. Two decades later, they seem to have both put the petty past behind them.
Joy Bryant
Joy Bryant and the "In da Club" rapper reportedly dated from 2005 to 2006. The two were co-stars in Get Rich or Die Tryin' and had impeccable chemistry. However, it seems they couldn't replicate that chemistry offscreen.
Ciara
Photo by Johnny Nunez/WireImage
The "Can't Leave Him Alone" collaborators dated from 2007 to 2010. In 2012, Ciara revealed why they ultimately called it quits during an interview with the Ricky Smiley Morning Show. “He’s obviously far from afraid of anything that he can control. But at the same time — him not being afraid of anything in that way — the one thing he is afraid of is love," she said. "And with that being said, in a sense, he’s afraid of me.”
Chelsea Handler
The couple that surprised everyone the most was 50 Cent and Chelsea Handler. The comedian called the mogul her favorite ex. “I love 50 Cent, he was fun. He was just a sweetheart, and he was fun to be around,” Chelsea told Entertainment Tonight in January 2023. “My friends loved hanging out with him. I loved hanging out with him. It was a pretty short-lived romance. It was only two months. But yeah, I mean, If I saw him, I’d definitely have a drink with him.”
Daphne Joy
50 dated model Daphne Joy from 2011-2012, and they share a 12-year-old son, Sire. The Grammy award-winning artist is currently suing his ex for defamation after she accused him of rape. This accusation came after 50 asked for sole custody of their son following Lil Rod's sex abuse lawsuit against Diddy, which alleged that Daphne was a longtime sex worker. The model has also accused her ex of abuse in the past.
Jamira "Cuban Link" Haines
Photo by JC Olivera/Getty Images
Jamira Haines, known on social media as Cuban Link, and 50 began dating in 2019. Since then, they have made many public appearances together and have been posted on each other's social media pages. However, it appears the law school student and the rapper are no longer together. While neither party has confirmed the breakup, Jamira has scraped her social media with any traces of 50.
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