6 Career Women On The Biggest Lessons Learned In Their Respective Fields
Last year, a Fast Company article addressed the lack of diversity in the millennial wave of networking conferences. Thankfully, many women are rising to meet this need in the community and churning out incredible events that leave attendees motivated to pursue their passions across fickle industries. We all know representation is nothing short of everything, so it's amazing to see these conferences grow and deliver impactful content.
I recently attended a panel discussion hosted by Every Stylish Girl, a space for stylish women of color to break barriers and empower future bosses. The networking Sip N' Slay brunch and panel event featured prominent women of color from music, fashion, public relations and even television. A vibrant energy filled the room and everyone whipped out their trendiest pieces for a celebratory day of workin' women of color. How could you NOT stan?! The spirit of embracing your success while also owning the trials along the way was the relatable representation I didn't know I needed.
Here's a recap of a few motivational gems from amazing women of color paving the way and driving impact in their respective fields.
Ashley Blaine Featherson, Actress
Ashley Blaine Featherson is the actress behind a key character, Joelle, in the original Netflix comedy-drama series Dear White People. Ashley joined the discussion determined to relay the trials behind the great triumphs of her journey.
She affirmed to a crowd of 20-somethings that you WILL make it to the other side of your quarter-life crisis:
"I was feeling so down and out at 26, but when you wake up at 31, life is going to be so different and you are going to be so grateful for the trials and tribulations you are going through right now."
I admire her radical transparency and her desire for everyone to know the true journey of her career. She mentioned the success she's experiencing now came at a price: over a decade of hard work and dedication.
"I've been here for almost 10 years, so know that there have been more trials than triumphs in my life, particularly in my career. That's why I'm very transparent about my age because I don't want anyone to think that I just got here. No, I've been grinding for a decade."
Literally counting down until she releases her podcast titled "Trials & Tribulations". Stay tuned.
Sarissa Thrower, Communications Manager at Instagram
As I mentioned earlier, relatable representation is everything. Being a black woman in the corporate entertainment world at the beginning of her career and hearing an accomplished black woman affirm the underlying micro-aggressions behind comments about your "tone" is the reason why these events are so important.
Amongst the gems Sarissa Thrower happened to toss our way, my favorite were her thoughts on the importance of identifying the privilege you do have in the workplace and leveraging it to create opportunities for others who would not have had said opportunity. She mentioned in her current position, she is constantly mindful of her ability to provide a platform for other people and the ripple effects that opportunity could have in the community. Sis, you are appreciated!
Kamie Crawford, Host, Model, Content Creator
Kamie Crawford is the connector you need in your circle. Not only did she help her friend land a role as Anna Wintour's assistant, but her determination to see all her friends win definitely gave her the good karma she deserved. Kamie spoke in great length about her career and how she consistently pushed herself to go after the things she knew she enjoyed and was passionate about. She continues to grind while landing big gigs, such as her recurring stint as co-host on MTV's Catfish.
When asked about getting a foot in the door in the LA broadcast industry, she mentioned the importance of stalking. Don't be afraid to track down a host/producer on the show you want and pitch segment ideas. Get creative!
Melissa Victor, Senior Vice President at Sony Music
I applaud Melissa Victor's gracious grit and her transparency about her path to becoming a Senior Vice President at Sony Music. Melissa's current role sounds like the career you achieve in your dreams where you're planning marketing campaigns for iconic artists like Janet Jackson and Lenny Kravitz. The steps she took to get there are where the true lessons lie.
Not only was Melissa on the path to law school, she was also working at a law firm after graduating. Once realizing her dream of pursuing a career in music, she dropped the legal job, moved back in with the parents and got an entertainment internship for a small weekly stipend. In hindsight, this career choice definitely paid off but it's such a lesson on the necessary sacrifices for pursuing a dream in a tough industry like entertainment. Who better to invest in than yourself?
Ade Samuel, Celebrity Stylist
Ade Samuel joined the panel and equipped us with everything we needed through her fun, relatable personality and strong work ethic. Ade has a celebrity roster that includes favorites like zaddy Big Sean and our favorite activist/actress Yara Shahidi.
What most resonated with me was her confidence in her seat at the table:
"For me what was most important was finding my seat at the table and making sure that I was seen. Even though I was one of four black people, I would always find myself going into those meetings and making sure my opinion was stated; regardless of how others may have felt about it."
This really hit home because after getting into a room, it's so easy for impostor syndrome to take over and feel like you do not belong. Ade affirmed you indeed belong at that table and the table actually benefits from what you contribute to it. Speak up, girl!
Samira Ibrahim, Director of Base Communications
Samira Ibrahim contributed the entrepreneurial perspective of quitting a stable 9 to 5, and embarking on a journey full of great risk but also huge rewards. She admits the greatest risk she took was betting on herself. Samira was confident she could create the work and lifestyle she wanted without relying on a corporate gig to provide that. With that, she stepped beyond the bubble of security and established Base Communications. Hearing the journey of a young entrepreneur firsthand is something that everyone can relate to in their career journeys.
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Featured image by Ade Samuel/Instagram
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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How A Stay At Switzerland's Luxurious 7132 Hotel Reminded Me To Live The Life I Deserve
Sometimes, as women—especially as single Black women—we simply need to be reminded that we are deserving of living a life we dream of. Even if that means creating it for ourselves. I recently set out on a weeklong trip to Switzerland, a trip I’ve been wanting to take for years, and near the end of my visit, I had an epiphany.
“DeAnna, this is the life you deserve,” I thought to myself as I took in the gorgeous bathroom in my suite at the famous 7132 Hotel and Thermal Spa. It was one of the most luxurious hotels (and bathrooms) I had ever stayed in—and that’s saying a lot for someone who often travels for work.
To help you better understand why this was such a mental awakening for me, I first need to give a bit of my backstory. I’m in my late thirties. I’m an attorneyand a journalist. I own a home and have traveled the world extensively. Essentially, I’ve done everything in life I set out to do. However, when it comes to dating, I struggle. Not because there is anything wrong with me per se, but because my career and “lifestyle” often create problems in my romantic relationships.
View from my hotel room
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I’ve been told everything from, ‘I can’t continue to date you because you seem to choose your career over wanting to settle down and have kids’ by a man after only the second date to ‘Maybe if you just sat down somewhere for a while, I’d actually wife you’ by someone who has honestly never proven themselves to be the settle down type. And these are only a handful of the things I’ve been told over the years.
It’s been frustrating, to say the least, and there have even been seasons where I purposely dimmed my light in hopes that my career wouldn’t push away potential suitors. I know what you’re thinking, “Girl, why would you even consider that? If they’re for you, it won’t matter what you do.” Hey, don’t judge me, but also, I one hundred percent agree.
My hotel bathroom
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That’s why this recent moment in Switzerland was right on time. When I first walked into the hotel to check in, I was blown away by the surrounding beauty. It was a five-star property with one of the world’s most famous thermal bathhouses. Yet, it was something about seeing that 90% of the hotel’s guests were couples, that forced me to sit back for a bit of introspection—while soaking in the thermal spa, of course.
As I went through the mental conversation, there was a battle of sorts. On one hand, I knew that being able to partake in experiences like the one I was having at that moment was important to me. I knew that, at times I actually love being able to dabble in the finer things—after all, I’ve worked hard to be able to afford them. On the other hand, and sadly, I knew that sometimes being a single Black woman that publicly showcases her “luxurious” habits can intimidate men and even scare them off from pursuing you under the guise of them feeling like they “can’t do anything for you, because you have everything.”
My hotel room
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So, what is a girl to do?
Do I minimize/hide the life and experiences that I have? Do I play down the hard work I’ve put in to get where I am professionally? Or, do I risk being single in exchange for being able to have said life, without backlash?
Luckily, the joy that I felt while being at this property won. There was something about taking a full day to simply pamper myself at the bathhouse and in my in-room steam shower and soaker tub, indulging in cuisine from a 2-star Michelin restaurant and doing all of this while surrounded by an amazing group of Black women that reminded me—this is certainly the life I was meant to live and that I deserve. Even if it means that right now, I’ll just have to provide it for myself until the right partner comes along. And honestly, I’m okay with that.
Restaurant at 7132 hotel
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