Ladies, Here Are 4 Indicators It's Time To Shoot Your Shot
It's hard as hell for a person to know when they should go for the bait. It can be quite confusing, to be honest. So many signals can become mixed when It comes to figuring out if someone is interested in you or they are just simply being polite.
Amongst being curved, embarrassed, or getting our lil' feelings hurt, it could also be quite intimidating to make a play for that Zaddy that you have your eyes on, but let's make sure we all have a clear understanding, ladies. There is a total difference between showing that handsome stud that you're interested versus full-blown chasing a man and scaring his ass off. It's all about reciprocity and vibes. If a man is showing the same type of interest in you as you are in him or giving strong hints, then that's your time to analyze your "go" signal thoroughly and go for the shot.
Shooting your shot doesn't have to a be a life sentence of curvedom. If you know what signs to look for and get rid of the outdated mindset that a man has to pursue you first, it could actually be an all-around confidence booster; a feeling of gaining your power back. It's simply about getting comfortable in knowing you have the capability of being "the chooser" and don't have to wait on a man to decide if you are worthy of being chosen.
Once you put yourself out there and show your interest, if he is interested, trust and believe he will take the lead from there. As scary as an ego hit can be, if the ball is in your court and you don't take the opportunity to score a winning shot, how else would you know what it feels like to win in the game of love? Scroll below for four ways to know it's finally time to shoot your shot:
Direct Eye Contact
If your future bae is giving you the googly eyes, you better believe that you have some type of captivating quality that has caught his attention. Men will typically shy away or look off from women they aren't interested in, all in hopes of not giving the wrong signal. But if he keeps gazing at you, looking directly in your eyes and making himself known to you, sis, that man is trying to catch your attention. It's up to you now to work your magic. Brush into him by accident, signal him over, or just plain out spark up a conversation with him. Men love humor, so compliment him in a playful way and see where it goes from there.
Body Language
Pay attention to the details. If he is being particularly conscious about his appearance while he's in your presence, you might have hooked your dream guy on the low. When he's overly smiling, biting his lips, fixing his cuff links, belt, or tie constantly, or touching his beard or hair over and over, he's more than likely trying to flaunt his best assets and he wants you to notice him. Men always want to be seen as masculine and powerful so if he's facing towards you, leaning in close, or he's tryna find a suitable place to put his hands, you've got this man intrigued and he wants to get closer to you; it's time to make a move.
Physical Contact
You know the saying "actions speak louder than words"? Well in this case, that's a sure bet. This is probably one of your easiest clues to tell when you should be pushing up on your possible man-to-be, or one of your options (if that's your cup of tea). A man is very unlikely to touch you in any way if he isn't somewhat interested in you. He might rub against you subtly, brush his hand over your shoulder, graze the small of your back with his palm, or simply grab your hands and hold them. Even if words haven't been exchanged about what's going on between the two of you, the physical chemistry speaks volumes and the volume is up loud and clearly saying, "Throw the ball in his court, sis."
Verbal Hints
This is more than likely the case for most of my millennial babes when it comes to meeting men via social apps. Most people have social media buddies or crushes that they chat with on a regular through DM, but even though you're chatting, you could be unsure what the vibe is with that person if they aren't sending you direct heart eye emojis. An easy way of knowing if he's worth scoring an alley-oop on is if he is being extremely flirtatious with you. When he's giving you compliments, saying nice things to keep you inspired or motivated, or showing interest in you, in general, he's giving you an open opportunity to show interest back. He's more than likely testing the waters to see how he can get in good graces with you and, if you're digging him, this is the ultimate time to let him know he's appreciated and slide him that number so you can text and not chat through DM.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
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Featured image by Shutterstock.
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Corein Carter is a Los Angeles-based blogger, content creator and podcaster. The New Jersey native has had a love affair with words since she began penning poetry in high school and later went on to study journalism at WSSU. The self-proclaimed "Naturalista" embodies all things spiritual, plant-based, and self-care in both her daily life and through writing. You may recognize Corein's captivating voice and well-rounded perspectives from her fast growing podcast "Play on Words". Follow her journey on Twitter and Instagram @inlivingcolored.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Sheila Rashid's Androgynous Approach To Unisex Clothing Is A Lesson In Embracing Individuality
The ItGirl 100 List is a celebration of 100 Black women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table.
For Sheila Rashid, it all started with some free-hand drawings and a few strokes of paint.
The Chicago-based clothing designer and creative director of Sheila Rashid Brand recalls using her spare time in high school to hand paint designs on t-shirts and distressed hoodies, distributing them to classmates as walking billboards for her art.
Rashid sought to pursue fashion design at Columbia College in Chicago but eventually took the self-taught route to build upon her knack for crafting one-of-a-kind, androgynous pieces.
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Thanks to the mentorship of local designers taking her under their wings, Rashid was able to gain valuable experience in putting together collections and creating patterns; equipping her with them with the necessary skills to pursue her own collections.
After two years of living in New York, Rashid returned home to the Chi and uncovered the unique flair she could offer the city. “I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world,” she tells xoNecole. “That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
For the Midwest native, inspiration comes from her time around creative peers and the city’s notorious winters — known to be a main character in many Chicagoans stories. “It's a different perspective and mindset when I'm making stuff because of the weather here,” she explains. “When we get summer, it’s ‘Summertime Chi’ — it's amazing. It's beautiful. Still, I find myself always making clothes that cater to the winter.”
"I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world. That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
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Many designers have a signature aesthetic or theme in their creations. In Rashid’s design story, dancing between the lines of femininity and masculinity is how she’s been able to distinguish herself within the industry. Her androgynous clothing has garnered the eye of celebrities like Zendaya, Chance the Rapper, WNBA star Sydney Colson, and more — showing her range and approach to designs with inclusivity in mind.
“I think I do reflect my own style,” she says. “When I do make pieces, I'm very tomboyish, androgynous. My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes.” From denim to overalls, and color-drenched outerwear, Rashid has mastered the structure of statement pieces that tell a story.
“Each collection, I never know what's going to be the thing I'm going to focus on. I try to reflect my own style and have fun with the storytelling,” she shares. “I look at it more like it's my art in this small way of expressing myself, so it's not that calculated.”
"My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes."
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Still, if you were able to add up all the moments within Rashid’s 20-year career in design, one theme that has multiplied her into becoming an “ItGirl” is her confidence to take up space within the fashion industry as a queer, Black woman. “Being an ItGirl is about being yourself, loving what you do, finding your niche, and mastering that,” she says.
No matter where you are on your ItGirl journey, Rashid says to always remain persistent and never hesitate to share your art with the world. “Don’t give up. Even if it's something small, finish it and don't be afraid to put it out,” she says, “It's about tackling your own fear of feeling like you have to please everybody, but just please yourself, and that's good enough.”
To learn more about the ItGirl 100 List, view the full list here.
Featured image Courtesy