

No matter the time of year, finding the perfect cocktail of natural hair products that enhances my curls and confidence feels like a journey. As the temperatures begin to cool drastically, weather becomes more of a challenge as I scramble to find the ingredients that will keep my coils healthy and my scalp moisturized. Searching for solutions, I’ve learned that with the change of season there should be a few adjustments and alternative hair methods that can provide moisture, encourage growth and prevent breakage during cold dry weather.
For generations, Black women have developed unhealthy relationships with natural kinks and curls due to negative words, thoughts, and feelings towards our hair. Along with a lack of natural hair care education, there’s an oversaturated market of products marketed towards ethnic hair care but made of ingredients that do more harm than good, leaving many of us feeling overwhelmed, defeated, and insecure about our hair in its natural form. It's never too late to find what works for you and with winter approaching, this is the perfect opportunity to learn of proper tools and products that will protect and maintain beautiful curly hair throughout the harsh weather.
I spoke to Dr. Gaby Longsworth, Ph.D. scientist, certified hair practitioner, biotech/pharmaceutical patent attorney, and owner of online natural hair resources Absolutely Everything Curly and CurlPlanet on how she is helping women care for their curls with our own hands. As a Ph.D. scientist, she was curious to learn why certain hair products worked well for her hair but others did not. After extensive research, reviews, and understanding of ingredients, she realized the amount of misinformation being marketed to the masses. Becoming deeply passionate about sharing her knowledge and research, Dr. Gaby created a database of all things curly, available directly at our fingertips.
For insight on how to protect your curls with the right products, moisturizing methods, and routines, keep reading for Dr. Gaby Longsworth's 10 tips on how to prevent hair breakage this winter.
Courtesy of Dr. Gaby Longsworth
Dr. Gaby Longsworth, founder of Absolutely Everything Curly, a science-backed subscription-based educational space created to help those with all types of curls discover and embrace their hair in its natural form. Subscription to Absolutely Everything Curly's content for $2.99/month on their website.
On scalp detoxes and how to clarify curly hair:
"When someone does a scalp detox, that basically means a deep cleanse of the scalp to remove debris and build-up from pollution, hard water, oils, and dead skin cells from the hair follicles and rebalance the scalp pH to improve the scalp microbiome for healthy hair. The most common detox product has apple cider vinegar as a key ingredient. Other ingredients include charcoal, tea tree oil, and peppermint. My favorite detox product is the Bounce Curl Turmeric Detox.
"An inflamed scalp can lead to hair loss, dandruff, or other issues. Healthy scalp, healthy hair. When you clarify your scalp, a clarifying shampoo is used to strip the hair of excess buildup. Because these shampoos are more drying for curlies, they are not meant for regular use. The most common shampoos contain chemical surfactants such as ammonium- or sodium lauryl sulfate, ammonium laureth sulfate, and alpha-olefin sulfonate. The higher the pH of the product, the more drying it will be.
"Dry curls often lead to breakage and thinning and for that reason, most curlies should avoid sulfated shampoos. There are so many excellent clarifying shampoos on the market. My favorite brands include Ouidad, Bounce Curl, Jessiecurl and Kinky-Curly Come Clean."
On how to determine if you have low, medium, and high density hair:
"Density refers to how tightly packed individual hair strands are on the scalp. If you can easily see your scalp, you have a lower density or fewer individual hair strands per square inch. If it is harder to see the scalp, you have hair of medium density. If you can barely see your scalp or not at all you have high density hair – in other words, thick hair.
"To determine hair density, a popular test is the ponytail test, but this test is not possible if you have short hair."
On protective styles that won't cause hair breakage:
"Many protective styles are fine as long as the braids are not pulled too tightly. It is the tight tugging and pulling on the edge areas that causes hair loss. Cornrows, box braids, bantu knots, knotless braids, faux locs, crochet braids, twists, and goddess locs can all be fine, if not too tight. Extensions should not be too heavy.
"My favorite protective style is two-strand twists because they are lightweight, do not add tension, and require no heat. They also retain moisture longer and keep the hair tangle free. I also love wigs."
On her tips for how to avoid hair breakage this winter:
- Never use brushes on dry hair.
- Finger combing while detangling is best.
- If you do use a comb or a brush, it should be a wide tooth comb and only when hair is soaking wet and saturated with conditioner. If using a brush, it should be a detangling brush and used only on soaking wet hair saturated with a high slip conditioner. Divide high density hair into as many sections as possible, before detangling it with a detangling brush. Remember to be gentle in order to not break the hair strands.
- Do not use any heat on your hair. Once your hair is healthy, you can use a hooded dryer on cold air or low heat, or a diffuser. Lubricate your scalp with oil if needed, once or twice a week.
- If you have low-porosity hair, deep condition with steam or heat (such as with a thermal heat cap).
- Keep tight hairstyles or pulling at your edges to a minimum.
- Detox or clarify your scalp once or twice a month.
- Use the LOCG or LCOG (Liquid/leave-in, Cream, Gel, Oil ) method.
- At night, cover your hair with satin or silk, or put it up in a pineapple, and use a silk pillowcase.
- Choose protective hairstyles when possible.
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- Top To Bottom: 10 Tips To Strengthen Your Hair Follicles & Protect Your Ends ›
- 10 Things Your Natural Hair Needs In The Winter ›
- If Your Hair Keeps Breaking Off, You're Probably Doing This. ›
- Hard Water Natural Hair Solutions Products Damaged Curls - xoNecole: Lifestyle, Culture, Love, & Wellness ›
Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney & Jill Marie Jones On 'Games Women Play' & Dating Over 40
What do you get when you mix unfiltered truths, high-stakes romance, and a few well-timed one-liners? You get Games Women Play—the sizzling new stage play by Je’Caryous Johnson that’s part relationship rollercoaster, part grown-woman group chat.
With a powerhouse cast that includes Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney, Jill Marie Jones, Carl Payne, Chico Bean, and Brian J. White, the play dives headfirst into the messy, hilarious, and heart-wrenching games people play for love, power, and peace of mind. And the women leading this story? They’re bringing their whole selves to the stage—and leaving nothing behind.
From Script to Spotlight
The road to Games Women Play started over 20 years ago—literally.
“This script was written 20 years ago,” Jill Marie Jones said with a smile. “It was originally called Men, Money & Gold Diggers, and I was in the film version. So when Je’Caryous called me to bring it to the stage, I was like, ‘Let’s go.’” Now reimagined for 2025, the play is updated with sharp dialogue and modern relationship dynamics that feel all too real.
Demetria McKinney, no stranger to Je’Caryous Johnson’s productions, jumped at the opportunity to join the cast once again. “This is my third time working with him,” she shared. “It was an opportunity to stretch. I’d never been directed by Carl Payne before, and the chance to work with talent I admire—Jill, Claudia, Chico—it was a no-brainer.”
Claudia Jordan joked that she originally saw the role as just another check. “I didn’t take it that seriously at first,” she admitted. “But this is my first full-on tour—and now I’ve got a whole new respect for how hard people work in theater. This ain’t easy.”
Modern Love, Stage Left
The play doesn’t hold back when it comes to the messier parts of love. One jaw-dropping moment comes when a live podcast proposal flips into a prenup bombshell—leaving the audience (and the characters) gasping.
Demetria broke it down with honesty. “People don’t ask the real questions when they date. Like, ‘Do you want kids? How do you feel about money?’ These convos aren’t happening, and then everyone’s confused. That moment in the play—it’s real. That happens all the time.”
Jill chimed in, noting how the play speaks to emotional disconnect. “We’re giving each other different tokens of love. Men might offer security and money. Women, we’re giving our hearts. But there’s a disconnect—and that’s where things fall apart.”
And then Claudia, of course, took it all the way there. “These men don’t even want to sign our prenups now!” she laughed. “They want to live the soft life, too. Wearing units, gloss, getting their brows done. We can’t have nothing! Y’all want to be like us? Then get a damn period and go through menopause.”
Dating Over 40: “You Better Come Correct”
When the conversation turned to real-life relationships, all three women lit up. Their experiences dating in their 40s and 50s have given them both clarity—and zero tolerance for games.
“I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt,” said Jill, who proudly turned 50 in January. “I say what I want. I mean what I say. I’m inside my woman, and I’m not apologizing for it.”
Demetria added that dating now comes with deeper self-awareness. “Anybody in my life is there because I want them there. I’ve worked hard to need nobody. But I’m open to love—as long as you keep doing what got me there in the first place.”
For Claudia, the bar is high—and the peace is priceless. “I’ve worked hard for my peace,” she said. “I’m not dating for food. I’m dating because I want to spend time with you. And honestly, if being with you isn’t better than being alone with my candles and fountains and cats? Then no thanks.”
Channeling Strength & Icon Status
Each actress brings something different to the play—but all of them deliver.
“I actually wish I could be messier on stage,” Claudia joked. “But I think about my grandmother—she was born in 1929, couldn’t even vote or buy a house without a man, and didn’t give a damn. She was fearless. That’s where my strength comes from.”
For Jill, the comparisons to her iconic Girlfriends character Toni Childs aren’t far off—but this role gave her a chance to dig deeper. “If you really understood Toni, you’d see how layered she was. And Paisley is the same—misunderstood, but strong. There’s more to her than people see at first glance.”
Demetria, who juggles singing and acting seamlessly, shared that live theater pushes her in a new way. “Every moment on stage counts. You can’t redo anything. It’s a different kind of love and discipline. You have to give the performance away—live, in the moment—and trust that it lands.”
Laughter, Lessons & Black Girl Gems
The show has plenty of laugh-out-loud moments—and the cast isn’t shy about who steals scenes.
“Chico Bean gets a lot of gasps and laughs,” Claudia said. “And Naomi Booker? Every scene she’s in—she’s hilarious.”
But the play isn’t just about humor. It leaves space for reflection—especially for Black women.
“I hope we get back to the foundation of love and communication,” said Demetria. “A lot of us are in protector mode. But that’s turned into survival mode. We’ve lost softness. We’ve lost connection.”
Claudia agreed. “We’re doing it all—but it’s not because we want to be strong all the time. It’s because we have to be. And I just want women to know: You can have peace, you can be soft. But stop bringing your old pain into new love. Don’t let past heartbreak build walls so high that the right person can’t climb over.”
Final Act: Pack the House
If there’s one thing this cast agrees on, it’s that this play isn’t just entertainment—it’s necessary.
“Atlanta is the Black entertainment hub,” Claudia said. “We need y’all to show up for this play. Support the arts. Support each other. Because when we pack the house, we make space for more stories like this.”
Games Women Play is more than a play—it’s a mirror. You’ll see yourself, your friends, your exes, and maybe even your next chapter. So get ready to laugh, reflect, and maybe even heal—because the games are on.
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Patricia "Ms. Pat" Williams has always marched to the beat of her own brutally honest drum — and that’s exactly what makes her so magnetic to watch. Whether she’s making us laugh until we cry on The Ms. Pat Show or now laying down the law on her courtroom series Ms. Pat Settles It, the comedian-turned-judge proves time and again that there’s nobody quite like her. Unfiltered, hilarious, and real to the core, she’s made a name for herself by turning her life’s journey — including the pain — into purpose.
Now in her second season of Ms. Pat Settles It, airing on BET and BET+, she’s not only delivering verdicts — she’s dishing out life lessons in between the laughs. The show feels less like your typical courtroom drama and more like your outspoken auntie running a court session at the family cookout, complete with celebrity jurors, petty disputes, and a whole lot of real talk. xoNecole sat down with Ms. Pat to talk about her wildest cases, balancing motherhood and fame, and why sleeping in separate bedrooms might just be the key to joy.
CASE CLOSED, BUT MAKE IT CHAOS
If you’ve ever tuned in to Ms. Pat Settles It, you already know the episode titles alone deserve awards. But when we asked Ms. Pat which case stood out most, she didn’t even have to think twice. “There was this one woman — Shay — who got out of federal prison and was working for her old bunkmate. But the bunkmate didn’t want to pay her!” she says, chuckling. “That girl came in the courtroom like a firecracker.”
It’s moments like those that remind viewers Ms. Pat isn’t just bringing the laughs — she’s giving people a platform, even if it’s a little messy. And if her court ever gets turned into a real-life franchise, we need Shay on the promo posters immediately.
WHEN THE CELEBS SHOW OUT
It’s already hard enough to get a word in with Ms. Pat running the show, but throw in a celebrity jury featuring Tamar Braxton, Ray J, TS Madison, and Karlous Miller? Whew. “I don’t even try to control them,” she laughs. “Thank God we have something called editing.” According to her, behind the scenes, things get wild — but that chaos is part of the magic. “People only see the cut-down version. What you don’t see is all of us losing it in real time.”
Still, Ms. Pat makes it work. The courtroom becomes a stage, but also a safe space for guests and jurors to show up as their full, unfiltered selves. “It was a wild season,” she explains. Let’s be honest — if your jury looks like a BET Awards afterparty, you might as well let it rock.
IF FAMILY COURT WAS REALLY A THING
Ms. Pat might wear the robe on screen, but at home, she’s still managing her own wild bunch. When asked what kind of case her kids would bring into her courtroom, she burst into laughter. “Oh, they’d be suing my oldest son for eating their food,” she says. “You know how you have that one roommate that eats up everybody’s food? I can see my oldest son getting sued for that..”
And let’s face it, we’ve all either been that sibling or have one. Ms. Pat says moments like that — the everyday family squabbles and real-life irritations — are what make her courtroom show so relatable.
THE VERDICT SHE WISHES SHE COULD REWRITE
Ms. Pat is known for keeping it real, even when the conversation turns serious. When asked if there was one “verdict” in her real life she’d change, she pauses for a second before answering. “I wish I had graduated high school,” she admits. “All my kids went to prom and I took all of their high school diplomas.”
“I wish I had graduated high school,” she admits. “All my kids went to prom and I took all of their high school diplomas.”
It’s a rite of passage in most Black households — your diploma doesn’t really belong to you, it lives at your mama or grandma’s house like a family heirloom.
HOW SHE STAYS GROUNDED
Between filming TV shows, headlining comedy tours, and running a household, Ms. Pat makes it very clear: she will find time to rest. “People swear I don’t sleep, but I do — I just knock out early and wake up early,” she shares. “And sometimes, I’ll just sit in my car.” She’s also a big fan of solo naps and mini getaways when things get overwhelming.
But one of her favorite forms of self-care? Separate bedrooms. “Me and my husband don’t sleep in the same room. That way, when I don’t feel like being bothered, I go to my space,” she laughs. She’s also found a new love for facials. “They’re addicting! I don’t need a lot — just sleep, a facial, and a little quiet.” Honestly? That’s a self-care routine we can get behind.
FROM PAIN TO PURPOSE
Ms. Pat’s story is one that’s deeply rooted in resilience — and she’s always been transparent about how her journey shaped her. Her advice to other Black women trying to turn their pain into purpose? Speak up. “You have to tell your story,” she says. “Because once you tell your story, you realize you’re not the only person that’s been through that situation.”
She adds that sharing your truth can be one of the most powerful things you do. “When you give a voice to pain so many other people who have that pain gravitate to you,” she says. “To heal, you have to speak out loud about it. What you keep inside is what eats you up.” Coming from someone who built an entire brand on truth-telling? We believe her.
WHAT’S NEXT FOR MS. PAT?
While Ms. Pat’s got her hands full with Ms. Pat Settles It and her comedy show, she hints there’s much more to come. “I got some stuff poppin’ that I can’t even talk about yet,” she teases. “But just know, like Kendrick [Lamar] said, we about to step out and show ‘em something.” That multi-genre deal with BET and Paramount is clearly working in her favor — and she’s not slowing down anytime soon.
She says one of her proudest moments in this chapter of her career is seeing things she once dreamed of finally come to life. “In this business, you never know what’s gonna work or what’s gonna stick. But now I’m working with a network that really understands me — and that’s special,” she says. “I feel seen. And I’m just getting started.”
Whether she’s in the courtroom cracking jokes or catching up on rest in her own sanctuary, Ms. Pat is living proof that success doesn’t have to come at the cost of authenticity. She’s rewriting the rules in real time — on her terms, in her voice, and for her people. As she continues to turn pain into purpose, laughter into legacy, and everyday mess into must-see TV, one thing’s clear: Ms. Pat is in her prime. And we’re lucky enough to watch it unfold.
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