10 Essential Oils That Are Great For Feminine Hygiene (And A Few Other Things)
Feminine hygiene is an interesting topic. The main reason why I say that is because some people can’t actually agree on what it is. While some say that it strictly has to do with what’s going on with our vagina (and vulva) when we’re on our cycle, others say that it has to do with “all things considered” as it relates to cleanliness — and to a certain degree health — down below.
To keep everyone as happy as possible (this time…LOL), I decided to share some tips that will “scratch the itch” on both sides of the fence by providing some all-natural ways to take care of “her” by way of going the essential oils route.
For the record, these aren’t oils that I’ve merely read about before. These are the ones that I’ve tried out myself and can personally vouch for. Ones that, so long as you dilute them first (a few drops of oil in eight ounces of distilled water can make it a great vaginal wash or spray) and take the “less is more” (along with the, if your symptoms don’t go away, please see your doctor as soon as possible) approach, you can end up feeling really good and super fresh on a monthly basis. Ready?
1. Oregano Oil for Vaginal Odor
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If you’re looking for the kind of oil that is powerful when it comes to the antioxidants that are in it as well as its anti-inflammatory properties, oregano oil is that one. Some people use it to improve their gut health. Others rely on it to lower their cholesterol levels. Word on the street is it can also aid in helping to shed some pounds.
What makes it ideal when it comes to vaginal health is, not only does it contain potential antibacterial compounds that can help to heal a yeast infection, it can help to get rid of vaginal odor too.
2. Rose Oil Reduces Vaginal Inflammation
Let me tell it, everyone should have at least one bottle of rose oil in their house. There are plenty of science-based studies to back the fact that it’s great when it comes to treating symptoms that are related to depression and anxiety, sexual dysfunction, and stress. Rose oil is also awesome when it comes to reducing pain — this includes any that is period-related.
However, because it’s also an oil that is loaded with antibacterial and antifungal properties, if the blood and/or discharge that you’re dealing with due to your cycle is irritating your vulva (the skin outside of your vagina), rose oil can help to soothe the irritation and inflammation (especially if you’re someone who mostly wears pads).
3. Emu Oil to Soothe Vulvar Skin
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Speaking of oils that soothe — emu oil is another gem. From a beauty standpoint, it will help to deeply hydrate your skin, slow down the signs of aging (because Black CAN crack if you’re not careful), decrease the appearance of acne scars, and lighten age spots. If you’re a new mom, another bonus when it comes to this particular oil is it can make your nipples feel less irritated if you happen to be breastfeeding.
As far as your vulvar skin goes, emu oil provides the same benefits to it that it does to the rest of your body — and since moisturized skin is less irritated, it definitely gives a calming effect. Also, since it helps to stimulate collagen production in your system, it can help your vulvar skin to also appear plumper and more youthful-looking over time.
4. Clove Oil Decreases Period-Related Discomfort
I’m gonna tell you right here and right now that if you have a toothache, run out and get some clove oil. It will help to deaden the pain almost immediately. Aside from that, the properties of clove are associated with relieving respiratory conditions, bringing relief to skin that suffers from chronic itching and it can help to decrease muscular pain.
And since your uterus is a muscular organ that contracts in order to shed its lining when you’re on your cycle, that’s why it can be beneficial for you when you’ve got cramps and abdominal discomfort. Simply mix a few drops with your favorite carrier oil, warm it up for a few seconds in the microwave, and then give the lower part of your tummy a nice massage with the oil. You should feel your cramps easing up within 20 minutes or so.
5. Frankincense Oil Stimulates Blood Flow to Reproductive Organs
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This essential oil is bomb on a few different levels. It helps to reduce stress. It can put you in a better mood. Its powerful astringent properties are great at killing fungi and bacteria. It helps to fade stretch marks and surgery scars. It can also help you to get a good night’s rest thanks to its ability to open up your nasal passages and regulate your body temperature.
When you’re on your period, your body will adore it because not only can it help to balance out your hormone levels, but it also increases blood flow to your reproductive organs which can assist with shortening the time of your cycle and make your cramps less intense until your period ends.
6. Rosemary Oil for Vaginal Infections
My skin adores some rosemary oil. Ever since I’ve been applying it to my skin at night, it has evened out my complexion, helped to keep period pimples at bay, and given me a natural glow. It’s also been a reliable oil when it comes to sealing the ends of my hair. In fact, it has a pretty solid reputation for helping to restore hair loss if you're consistent with using it.
If it seems like clockwork that you end up experiencing some sort of vaginal infection when you’re on or right after you come off of your cycle, that’s because it could be causing an imbalance of the yeast and bacteria that’s naturally inside of your vagina during that time of the month. The anti-inflammatory and antibacterial properties in the oil can help to heal these kinds of vaginal infections. Not only that but some studies say that rosemary oil can speed up the healing process of trichomoniasis too (speak with your doctor about that one, though).
7. Lavender Oil for Bacterial Infections
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From an aromatherapy standpoint, lavender oil is one of the most popular ones when it comes to reducing anxiety and stress, promoting relaxation, and helping you to get a better night’s rest. Something else that might surprise you is there are studies to support that it can help to decrease symptoms that are associated with diabetes, plus it can help to soothe the discomfort that’s associated with having a headache.
Since it’s also a strong antifungal type of oil, you can also use lavender to help treat bacterial infections. When it’s a top ingredient in a homemade vaginal wash, it can help to get rid of the discharge that’s associated with common bacterial infections.
8. Tea Tree Oil for Yeast Infections
If you want a zit to go away, pretty much overnight, something that will do it is tea tree oil. What I especially like about it is the fact that although it’s potent as hell, it doesn’t dry out my skin (when I use it as a spot treatment) while it’s working. Some other benefits that come with it include the fact that its super potent (and I’m not exaggerating here) antibacterial, antifungal, and antioxidant properties also make it a top-notch when it comes to being a reliable ingredient for all-natural sanitizer, DIY deodorant, and getting rid of nail fungus.
It's alsothat one when it comes to treating yeast infections. That’s because its antimicrobial and antifungal properties help to prevent the overgrowth of yeast as well as bring relief when it comes to incessant itching and irritated vaginal and vulvar skin.
9. Thyme Oil Helps to Heal Candida Vaginitis
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If you’re someone who likes to cook with fresh thyme, good for you because, whether you realize it or not, you’re doing some great things for your body. Due to the potent antifungal, anti-inflammatory, and antibacterial properties that are in thyme, it’s great at fighting breakouts, suppressing coughs, and helping your food last for longer periods of time. Since thyme is also high in vitamins A and C as well as copper, iron, and manganese, it’s a good idea to consume it if you’re looking to boost your immune system.
However, what trips me out the most about thyme/thyme oil is there is scientific intel to support that if you combine it with garlic, it’s just as effective as clotrimazole vaginal cream at treating candida vaginitis (vaginal irritation that has an overgrowth of candida in it). How freakin’ impressive is that?
10. Peppermint Oil Is a Vaginal pH Balancer
Let’s wrap this all up with peppermint oil. The menthol in this oil makes it a super bomb oil for treating bad breath. However, it’s also oftentimes used to speed up the healing process of the common cold, nausea, and migraine-related discomfort. Your scalp will also like peppermint because it can reduce itchiness and increase blood flow to your hair follicles which can increase hair growth. Plus, if you like to work out, it can soothe joint and muscle-related pain.
As far as your vagina goes, since peppermint oil acts as a powerful fungicide, it can keep your vagina at its proper pH balance (check out “Sis, This Is How To Keep Your Vagina's pH Balanced”); that’s because it kills harmful bacteria that can throw it off. It’s also an oil that can keep vaginal odor under control whether it’s during your cycle or not.
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There you have it — 10 essential oils that are great for when you’re on your cycle or if you want to keep common vaginal issues under control without the need for (a lot of) medication. Just make sure that you use it externally unless you run it by your physician first. Douching, even when it’s with an essential oil, can still do more harm than good, more times than not, because it can throw your vagina’s pH balance off — and that can cause all hell to break loose.
Also, make sure that you go with a reputable brand of essential oil (check out a list of them via The Sprucehere). Believe you me, a lot of people give essential oils the side-eye, thinking that they’re not effective when really they just purchased a cheap (including cheap quality) brand.
Beyond all of this, ENJOY! Again, I can personally vouch for all of these and my vagina and vulvar have only been at (more) peace because of ‘em.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Exclusive: Melanie Fiona On Making High-Vibrational Music & Saying Yes To Partnership
Melanie Fiona is back! After taking a little more than a decade-long hiatus, she has officially made her return to music and blessed us with two singles, “Say Yes” and “I Choose You.” While both singles are very different from each other, they both reflect who she is today and the type of music she wants to make. In our conversation, the mom of two expressed what she learned during her time away.
“It's interesting, even when I said it is like coming back, I don't ever feel like I really left because I was always still performing. I've still been public. It's not like I went into being this recluse person or version of myself, but the thing that I really learned in this process is that I think things take time,” Melanie says in a xoNecole exclusive.
“I think often we're so caught up in it, being on the timing of demand or popularity, or, like, striking while the iron is hot and the thing that I've learned is that everything is on God's time. That's it. Every time I thought I would have been ready, or, like, things were taking too long, I had to reship some things, personally, professionally, in my life. I also gave myself permission to make a living, not just make a living, but make a life for myself.”
Making a life for herself included getting married to Grammy-nominated songwriter Jared Cotter, starting a family, and embracing new landscapes, such as podcasting as a co-host of The Mama’s Den podcast. She also began doing more spiritual work and self-care practices like meditation, sound healing, Reiki, acupuncture, and boundary setting, which allowed her to get in touch with her inner voice.
“I wasn't putting out music, and I wasn't experiencing a number one record, but I was being a number one mom,” she says.
“I was experiencing things that were allowing me to heal and get in touch with myself so that I could make new music from a space of joy and freedom, and excitement again because I definitely feel like I did lose some excitement because of just politics and industry and what it can do to your mental health and even your physical health. So giving myself the space to really just say, ‘Hey, it's okay. Everything's right on time.’”
The joy and excitement are felt in one of two new singles, “I Choose You,” which is more of a lovers rock vibe, a tribute to Melanie’s Caribbean roots. While the Grammy award-winner is known for ballads like “It Kills Me” and “Fool For You,” she is becoming more intentional about the music she makes, calling it high-vibrational music. She says her music is a “reflection of my life,” as it captures every facet, from hanging out with friends to riding around in her car.
“Say Yes” has the classic R&B vibe Melanie is known for. However, both songs are inspired by her relationship. Melanie and Jared got married in December 2020, and the Toronto-bred artist dished on their relationship. Fun fact: he is featured in the “Say Yes” music video.
“When we first started dating, I had come into that relationship post a lot of self-work. I had gotten out of a long-term relationship, I had a year and a half to date and be by myself and do a lot of work on myself alone. And when we met, I remember feeling like this has to be my person because I feel it,” she says.
“And so when we went into that relationship, and we started dating, I was very clear. I was like, I know what I want. I'm very clear on what I need, and I'm not going to withhold my truth about myself in this process because of pride or fear of rejection. I know you love me, but I'm coming with my heart in my hand to let you know that if we're gonna get there, we have to put fear aside and say yes. So that was kind of like my open letter to him, which is why the video is us having a conversation.”
Melanie also shares that saying yes to her partner has empowered her in many ways, including motherhood and showing up for herself. Her new EP, also titled Say Yes, will be available at the top of 2025.
Check out the full interview below.
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We have less than 40 more days left in 2024, and while I'm not one to rush goals just because it's the end of the year, it can be fun to challenge yourself to think about ways you'll close out this year big.
Whether you're planning to meet a certain financial or fitness goal, or you're simply trying to maintain and build on the progress you made this year, having something to look forward to is always a good look. Setting actual goals, according to research, actually leads to more success than just playing things by ear. So here are a few to get you started, sis:
(Disclaimer: Not everything is for everyone, so do like my Granny always says: "Eat the meat. Spit out the bone." Take on five out of the 40 and focus on that for the remainder of the year, or do them all. Either way, this is just to get you started.)
40 Ways To End The Year Strong and Inspired
Money Moves
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1. Increase your retirement (or other savings/investment) contributions by 1%.
Experts have found that you could be leaving money on the table by not upping your contributions when you can.
2. Cancel two to five subscriptions.
You could be missing hundreds, even thousands, of dollars a year due to sneaky price hikes and "updates."
3. Create a "fun" in a high-yield savings account.
This is especially important if you struggle with the dreaded b-word (budget) and will make next year's efforts a lot less intimidating. Even if it's $10 a month, do it.
4. Put on your big-girl panties, and set up automatic transfers and payments for at least one bill.
It reduces the stress of managing bills, lessens the chance of a missed payment---and the fees that come with that---and there can be cost savings for doing so.
5. Invest in a cleaner or housekeeping service.
Bosses who value their time (and mental health) invest their dollars into areas where the time they'd spend doing those tasks themselves could be better used to focus on other money-making projects. (And yes, rest is part of that.) Get a housekeeper, sis, or drop off that laundry, even if it's once per month.
6. Donate to a charity.
Beyond the tax benefits, it's a win-win for the greater good of communities you care about.
7. Review your insurance policies and negotiate a better rate (or move on) before their end dates.
Experts often agree this is a small but mighty step to take each year, especially since insurance rates are competitive, you could be spending more money than you need to (or not enough) and your insurance rates can affect your mortgage payments.
8. Call your loan provider and refinance.
As interest rates fall, “millions of borrowers may be able to refinance and get more affordable payments. As interest rates eased down to 6.5%, about 2.5 million borrowers could already refinance and save at least 75 basis points (0.75%) on their interest rate,” the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau reports. You can also refinance student and other types of loans.
9. Stop buying individual items and stock up via going bulk.
Research has found that, among 30 common products, buying in bulk could save you 27% compared with buying in lower quantities. Water, paper products, and baby products like diapers, toiletries, and garbage bags are the top items where people see the most cost-effectiveness. (This has been a lifesaver for me—children, large family, or not—especially when it comes to toothpaste, deodorant, toilet paper, and feminine hygiene products, saving stress, time, and money.)
10. Go cash-only for the holidays.
If you set smart goals and stick to limits on things like gifts, going out to eat, or groceries, you'll see the benefits of this. Cash-stuffing is one method recommended, but something as simple as taking a $10 bill out for lunch, disabling that card for an hour, and leaving your card in a safe place at the office can give you that mindset jump start to see how far you can take your money without the need to splurge.
Love And Romance
11. Say "no."
There are clear mental and physical health benefits to saying no including the setting of healthy boundaries, creating time and energy for other self-care activities, and protecting yourself from physically harmful situations (i.e. unprotected sex or abuse). Just say it, clearly and simply, when you need to.
12. Set a fun, free, adults-only date night for once a week or twice a month with your spouse.
If busy, high-profile folk have touted the success of this, even you can make the time for quality time with your partner. And it's even better when it costs nothing. The best connections are made doing something chill, challenging, or outside the usual dinner-and-a-movie date. Play a game that allows you to reconnect, take a walk in your neighborhood to chat and laugh, or try a little erotic chocolate/edible liquid/paint episode a la Mea Culpa.
13. Go out with Mr. or Ms. "Not My Type."
I love my man, but if I were waiting out for my "type" at the time, we wouldn't be celebrating seven (going on eight) years together. Sometimes having strict, unrealistic expectations for a spouse (especially related to things like height, physical features, or career path) is what's keeping you alone and lonely.
Take the pressure off and explore all your options. I'm not telling you to stop popping the balloon on the guy who earns $20,000 less than you if that's a hard no that Jesus himself told you to skip. I'm asking you to explore other options and see what else God might have out there for your love journey.
14. Immediately apologize and pray together.
I've learned that always being "right" isn't always ideal when you truly care about someone and you're in a relationship for the long haul. Defaulting to an apology when necessary, even when things aren't 100% resolved, is a good way to prioritize peace and save your energy for more worthwhile battles. Research has even supported the benefits of apologies in relationships, and how couples married for five or more years do it often.
15. Get a Rose and discover true self-love.
Do I really have to explain this? You've gotta know what satisfies you, and how better to figure that out than to practice self-love in the bed by yourself? You can also try this with a partner, but as a woman who got on this train very much later in my sexual activity journey. I have a lot more learning to do on my own, and even in a satisfying relationship, I like to find out new things about myself, by myself.
Figure out what you're into, watch what you want to watch, and read what you want to read to define pleasure for yourself. There's a freedom and empowering element there especially if you're used to prioritizing pleasing your partner.
16. Be direct and have the "money talk" with bae.
Money issues are one of the leading causes of divorce, so you need to have those conversations before you even think about marrying someone. And true, nobody can predict the future so you won't be able to avoid some challenges altogether, however, talking with your potential spouse about how they view money, their spending habits, and the pain points in terms of their approach to money management can at least give you a glimpse into what's in store if you do walk down the aisle, move in with them, or decide to share a bank account/business/child with them.
17. Invest in the "paid" version of that dating app.
I know plenty of successful, married folk who did this and met "the one" as a result. Let's be honest: The free version is for playing around. I had a lot of fun with my "free" profile back in the day, trust me. Upgrade that photo, profile, and package, and see if the quality of your dating adventures changes when you're serious about finding a true partner. Dating coaches and matchmakers cosign this.
18. Solo travel to meet that long-distance connection.
Sometimes, your perfect match isn't within 100 miles of you, and that's okay. Make it an adventure, enjoy the memories, and book that ticket. I met my man this way and it's been a whirlwind escape ever since. If you're not comfortable traveling solo, travel or (network to plan travel) with a group via Facebook.
Career And Business
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19. Schedule coffee or virtual meetups with smart people from your graduating class, previous employer, or current employer.
I have gotten many freelance opportunities by doing this. It's as simple as connecting and offering value (or simply learning how you can better equip yourself to do so.) It's also a great way to expand your network, spark new friendships, or find out about new job opportunities.
20. Invest in a well-made suit.
I don't care what industry you're in, a suit says "power," and it's not as old-school or out-of-style as you'd think. Plus the whole experience of looking for a new one (or getting one tailored) is fun and affirming. Try these options. I swear, anytime I wear a blazer, I'm treated like a celebrity or boss, especially when traveling. I was once upgraded to first-class wearing a yellow blazer outfit, and the airline professional literally said, "You look like somebody important. Here you go."
21. Volunteer for a worthwhile project or cause that's important to your company.
If you're overworked and underappreciated, skip this one, but if you truly have the time, love what you do, and want to advance, this move is clutch. Volunteering for extra projects got me where I am today in media because I had foresight, and knew that was the only way at the time to leverage relationships, and I was able to challenge myself to learn skills that 20 years later are still bankable. That VP you can't get a meeting with will be at that gala your company is planning, so join that committee, sis.
22. Write down why you deserve a raise and ask for it in your next one-on-one.
Gather those receipts (ie sales increase numbers, KPIs met, deals closed, people acquired via recruitment, the impact of systems updates, or other tangible success metrics) and ask for that raise before the first or second-quarter budgets are being finalized.
23. Instead of quitting, write down your exit plan.
While revenge quitting is set to be a thing next year (and maybe you're among those who will be leading the trend), try the better boss move and quit with a real plan.
24. Start automatically separating that estimated self-employed quarterly tax estimate.
If you have side hustles (or you're collecting 1099 income,) baby, you do not want to neglect those quarter tax payments. Talk to a professional, do your research, and set up automatic transfers to an account specifically for paying these at the appropriate due dates.
25. Sign up for a free one- to 11-week course related to your industry—or the industry you want to be in next year.
Institutions like Harvard University and platforms like Coursera offer free courses that can enhance your skills. You can also invest in certificate courses with accredited colleges as well as tech training.
26. Hit "Easy Apply" for 10 dream jobs listed on LinkedIn.
While you shouldn't solely rely on this when actively job-seeking, using this convenient LinkedIn option is a great way to get into the habit of applying for positions. And if you're already employed, you should still be "dating" other employers if you're looking to make a move in the next six months. Keep your interview skills sharp, practice toughening up for the "nos," and get a bit of an ego boost in the process.
Self-Care And Wellness
27. Pre-schedule three month's worth of massages.
Oftentimes this is cost-effective since some spas offer deals for multiple bookings. Also, it makes an act of self-care deliberate and important, not an option. When you get that reminder call, you'll know it's real.
28. Fire that therapist and try another one.
Cultural competency in mental health support is one major problem that can hinder Black women from even bothering with therapy. And who wants the added stress of spending multiple, paid sessions explaining why something is a microaggression? Cut the cord and move on to try someone else, either via a Black women therapists channel or recommendations from others.
29. Join a small group at church.
Bedside service ain't gonna cut it and neither is going to the usual Sunday service. Join a smaller group and upgrade your efforts to connect, network, and elevate spiritually. Even if virtually, take a step to dig a bit deeper with more targeted Bible study and discussions.
30. Say no, even to loved ones.
This is on here twice, for a reason. Saying no is the simplest, most powerful micro-action you can take today to make 2025 better. No explanations. No guilt. Say no.
31. Choose one "luxury" beauty product for skincare and stick to it.
This was trending big on social, especially for millennials hitting their 40s. There's just something so freeing about not giving in to every trend and sticking to the basics that work, especially when there are quality, healthy ingredients involved. Put those orders on auto-renew.
32. Sign up for a new sport or fitness class just for fun, not for results.
It's great to be on a weight-loss or weight-lifting journey, but try something just for the fun of it. Switch things up with a couple of these fitness activities.
33. Book a staycation.
Leave the passport at home and explore a nearby community or another town in your state. There's so much enrichment in your own backyard right here in the U.S., and you don't even have to break the bank.
34. Pre-schedule your mammograms, Pap smear, and peri-menopause check ups for next year.
35. Cut off support of beauty and wellness professionals whose customer service is below standard.
This is another one that many Black women have been vocal about—from unrealistic pre-appointment requirements, to booking fees, to long waits, to unsavory in-salon experiences. Spot the red flags early, and just stop accommodating foolishness. Support salons or experienced stylists who are kind, have proper systems in place and value your time.
36. Schedule five to 10-minute moments of silence on your calendar.
Again, wellness is not optional, and if it's not on my calendar, it's not official. Sit quietly. Pray. Meditate. Or do nothing. The benefits of silent moments are almost endless.
37. Download a meditation app.
If you've found that meditation is difficult to schedule or to even start, an app can help. Try this, this, or this one, and take that step to embrace something new to enhance your wellness routine. If you're tired of downloading apps, create a playlist for meditation via Amazon Music or Spotify and schedule a reminder to do it once a day or week.
38. Invest in a healthy meal prep or delivery service.
Time is emotionally expensive, so save as much of it as possible. Getting into meal prep to keep to your goals is a great way to save time, stress, and effort. The health benefits of meal prepping have also been proven via research.
39. Create a positive playlist on Spotify, Amazon Music, YouTube, or other streaming platform.
It can be podcasts, music, affirmations, or somatic sounds. It's a game-changer. You can even set an alarm to wake you up to start your day with the positive playlist. Not into creating your own? There are plenty to choose from with a quick search.
40. Set up reminders for Alexa (Siri or other AI) to remind you, "You are loved," and "You are okay."
This simple effort can boost your endorphins and remind you that you're indeed, not alone, and you will be okay, regardless. To set mine up, I simply commanded, "Alexa, remind me everyday 'Jesus loves me,'" and like clockwork she does. She almost scared the ish out of me one day when I'd forgotten the reminder was active, but it was the reminder I needed when anxiety had gotten the best of me that week.
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