

Girl Bosses Share Essentials That Help Them Slay The Day
The way we begin our day sets the tone for how we feel about our day. And for a lot of women, our beauty routines are how we get into formation, and how we ultimately equip ourselves to slay the day ahead.
As a woman about her business, I find myself constantly drawing inspiration from the processes of other like-minded phenomenal women who are doing the damn thing in their work lives and taking impressive steps in their career journeys.
Whether she's a marketing coordinator at Squarespace, the founder of her own TRIBE, or the engineer coding for herself, a boss babe is never a boss without the tools that help make her hone in on that feeling of regality and success. Read on to learn the beauty essentials of some of our favorite thriving girl bosses on the rise.
Cheyenne Adler
Instagram:@adamantlyadler
Location: New York, NY
Occupation: Marketing Coordinator at Squarespace
Vitruvi Wake Aromatherapy Oil
“I've always been fascinated by aromatherapy, so I picked this up and I honestly can't start a day without it. A little Wake oil behind the ears in the morning, and I'm ready to tackle anything I've got on my plate - work, photoshoots, events, anything. Not only do you feel rejuvenated, but the scent is subtle enough that it pairs nicely with any perfume, so you smell incredible too."
Boy Brow by Glossier
“You know that saying, 'Don't let anyone with bad brows tell you sh*t about life?' Yeah, well I took that to heart! I never want to be the girl with bad brows! My brows are super full (borderline bushy) and have a mind of their own so I even if I'm not wearing any makeup, a nice swipe or two of Boy Brow always keeps them in shape while I'm sprinting around the office or around the city."
Fenty Beauty Killawat Highlighter in Girl Next Door
“Our girl, Rihanna really does know how to make a girl GLOW. I'm not one to wear a lot of make up on the day to day so I picked up the Girl Next Door/Chic Phreak palette to add a healthy, natural glow to my cheeks. When I wear it, it's a nice little essence of RihRih motivating me to be my best and baddest self."
A.N Other WD/18
“WD/18 is a new fragrance I discovered, and I'm absolutely obsessed. It kind of smells like Le Labo's notorious Santal scent, but half the price -- so you can see why I love it! I believe smelling good really gives a woman a little extra confidence, commanding attention, so you can definitely catch me leaning in a little more closely in meetings knowing I'm smelling bomb af."
Care/Of Monthly Subscription
“I have pretty hectic days Monday – Friday, so sometimes I'm not the best about managing a well-balanced diet filled with all the nutrients and the healthy good stuff. I know, I know, so bad and I've got to be better, but until I slow down, it's nice to have a reminder every day to at least take my vitamins. Care/Of is awesome because it's 100% customized from the mix of vitamins catered to your targeted needs and they have your name on the bags - what boss woman doesn't like seeing her name on something?"
Maura Chanz
Instagram:@maurachanz
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Occupation: Assistant, Mara Brock Akil – CEO of Glitter + Hustle – Founder of You Need Tribe
Fenty Beauty Pro Filt'r Soft Matte Longwear Foundation in 390
“Being a boss is about working smarter not harder. Fenty Foundation allows me to do this because it gives me a flawless look with one product. This foundation allows me a lightweight full coverage that keeps me looking flawless when myself nor my day are anything but."
MAC Ruby Woo Lipstick
“A boss asserts her power. For me, this can be done with something as simple as a boom on the lip. Red lipstick, specifically Ruby Woo, has always been a staple and keeps me feeling like I'm kicking ass and taking names."
Big Hoop Earrings
“In addition to working smarter and asserting my power, I always need something that speaks to my fun and eccentric nature. Hoop earrings are classic (to me) and always give me an edge to slay my day. I can always re-up at my local beauty store when necessary (I've picked some up en route places before)."
Amber Janae
Instagram:@ajscribes
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Occupation: Founder & Editor-in-Chief of THE CORE Magazine
Juicy Couture Eau de Parfum Spray & Bonbon by Viktor and Rolf
“Smelling good is priority on my list. I have two fragrances I love. Juicy Couture's first perfume ever, which I've been wearing since I was about 17. Also, Bonbon by Viktor and Rolf. A salesman suckered me on a trip to NY and I've been hooked since. Both fragrances are to die for. I was always taught that a woman should have a signature scent, which is why smelling good id something I always take pride in."
Rose Quartz
“I wear a rose quartz pendant around my neck daily or I'll carry one of my smaller rose quartz crystals in my pocket or purse. Rose quartz are symbolically known as the 'Love stone.' I like to wear it around my neck, close to my heart so that, that chakra remains opened and balanced. I also like it near as I reminder that I am love and am always covered in it."
Matcha Green Tea and Activated Charcoal Mask
“Great skin would have to be next. I love makeup, but it's so important for my skin to be clear and glowing underneath it all. My latest go-to product is the Matcha Green Tea and Activated Charcoal Mask by Beija Flor Naturals. Absolutely everything I never knew I needed. Its ingredients are all natural and literally leaves my skin feeling and looking radiant."

Dara Oke
Instagram:@daraoke_
Location: Lagos, Nigeria
Occupation: Entrepreneur, Software Developer + Designer
The True Cream Moisturizing Bomb by BELIF
“I have dry skin, as in - the absolute driest. Finding a facial moisturizer that understood me has been nothing short of a lifelong journey, this completely improved my skincare routine. Washing and moisturizing my face is now my favorite part of waking up and getting my mornings started."
Nars Velvet Matte Skin Tint + Lancome Teint Idole Ultra Foundation
“I was a drugstore foundation girl for a really long time (still swear by Maybelline Fit Me), but then I found foundations I loved enough to shell out the cash for. I rotate between my Nars and Lancome, neither of which are too heavy, but give me the flawless coverage and confidence to conquer my day."
NYX Lingerie Liquid Lipstick
“Working in tech, spending most of my days between meetings and offices always made picking my daily lip color a chore - balancing between not too bold, but still present. I love the muted colors, all day wear, and texture (probably the smoothest liquid lipstick I've tried) of these lipsticks. Plus, they're just a few dollars each. I can 100% guarantee that you'd catch me wearing this on any day."
David Yurman Châtelaine Pearl Earrings
“I was gifted a pair of these, and to this day they are the only earrings I haven't misplaced (likely because I rarely take them off, except sleep/shower). I never saw myself as a pearl person, nor had I ever purchased designer earrings, but these have become the most consistent part of my wardrobe, and make every outfit feel just a little bit elegant."
Chan-Lo
Instagram:@callherchanlo / @cnkdaily
Location: Dallas, TX
Occupation: Chief of Sneaker Chic at CNKDaily.com
Rosebud Salve by Rosebud Perfume Co.
“For me, hydrated lips are essential. If you're guilty of not drinking enough water (raises hand), you need a good lip balm to keep your lips hydrated, especially in extreme climates. I live for Rosebud Salve by Rosebud Perfume Co. It's about $6.00 and one pot last me about two months."
Neutrogena Oil-Free Face Moisturizer with SPF 35
“I live in Texas so, you never know what you're going to get as far as weather goes. So, I try to make sure to protect my skin as much as possible. A good face moisturizer with SPF is always the way to go for me personally. I've been using this Neutrogena option since college (when I was battling dry skin in the frozen Tundra of Minneapolis) and I swear by it. Plus, I can always find it for under $10, which makes me super happy."
Oh My How High! Lengthening Mascara by Butter London
“I don't do a full face of make-up every day. It's just too time consuming and I like to give my face a chance to breathe but, after throwing on some lip balm and combing out my eyebrows I usually put on some mascara before dashing out of the house. I received this mascara by Butter London in a gift bag and I haven't used anything else since. It doesn't flake, it's easy to remove, and it definitely gives your lashes a huge POP."
Palmer's Olive Oil Formula Deep Conditioner
“Deep conditioning my hair once a week has made it more manageable and it's easy to do. On Sundays, I usually wash with a good cleansing shampoo and add this deep conditioner post-wash. I usually put on a plastic cap and let it sit while I prep posts or plan social media for the week."
Love Your Bare Face Hydrating Cleansing Oil
“For those boss babes who hate how time consuming some face cleanse regimens are, this has been a game changer for me personally. The lightweight oil melts away a full face of makeup or the dirt from the day easily without stripping your skin. Plus, the oil adds moisture to your skin. I usually will put this on my face before I hit the shower, rinse off, and I'm good to go."
What are some of the go-to essentials you rely on to help you feel like a boss?
Exclusive: KJ Smith Talks Viral Wedding With Skyh Black: ‘We Did What We Wanted To Do’
Whether it was your group chat, social media feed, or your favorite media outlet covering the spectacle, I’m pretty sure you’ve come across the viral Black wedding between actress KJ Smith (Sistas, Raising Kanan) and actor Skyh Black (All the Queen’s Men, Sistas). From their grand entrance to Jay-Z, Kayne West, and Beyoncé’s song “Lift Off” to KJ’s standout dance routine and the endless celebrity appearances, it’s an addictive TikTok scroll you can’t help but delve into.
But what many people would be surprised to know is that the couple’s original wedding plan was nothing like what it grew to be. What started as her simply scrolling through posts to get ideas eventually transformed into what the internet knows now as #TheBlackExperience. In an exclusive conversation with xoNecole, KJ walked us through her planning process, the morning of her wedding, and what she thinks of the online response.
Some women have their whole wedding planned out, from the bridal gown and venue to the bridal party and playlist. However, KJ was not one of those people. “I didn’t foresee a wedding in my future,” she reveals. “I was just gonna be the boss chick, rich auntie. I didn’t force love in my life until recently. I never had an idea of what a dream wedding would look like, it was easier for me to elope.”
KJ Smith
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
And to many people’s surprise, that was their original plan – until Skyh brought up a valid concern. He was raised by his grandmother and thought she should be at the wedding, and naturally, that led to KJ wanting her grandmother to be there as well – then her mom – and later her sister – and, you’ve gotta invite the besties too, right? From there, the guest list continued to blossom. Much like the updo and pop of color bold red lip, she wore on her special day, which was initially on her Pinterest board as a soft glam look with her hair hanging on her shoulders, KJ is okay with changing her plan if it brings her and her loved ones happiness.
So let’s get into the wedding, which took place in Malibu, CA. The first thing you should know about the celebrity couple is that they’re non-traditional. They know, and they don’t care. So, in true unconventional fashion, they shared the morning of the wedding together.
“I woke up with Skyh, we walked our dog, had black coffee, and said good morning to the people who stayed at the venue with us,” she says.
Now, it was time for hair and makeup. While she was getting glammed up, she had Black-owned McBride Sisters wine and champagne (which ties into The Black Experience theme) on deck with her mom and friends, had her besties help rework her vows, retried on every outfit (sis is very Type-A), took photos, and ended the early-celebration with prayer and meditation. It seems very non-Bridezilla, I said.
“Yeah, I was the most unbothered bride ever. Everyone was just so supportive. As entertainers, we go on red carpets all the time. We actually have a production company,” she explains. “The get-ready process was like a day at work, but with people we love the most. Being entertainers, we didn’t feel stressed at all, but my excitement was so high.”
Things moved quickly, and before she knew it, it was time to line up to walk down the aisle.
“Yeah, I was the most unbothered bride ever. Everyone was just so supportive. As entertainers, we go on red carpets all the time. We actually have a production company. The get-ready process was like a day at work, but with people we love the most. Being entertainers, we didn’t feel stressed at all, but my excitement was so high.”
KJ Smith and her bridal party
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
Since everything started with their grandmothers, the couple wanted to ensure they honored them and planned to keep an element of their wedding traditional. Although we’ve all seen the reception videos and photos online, you may have noticed visuals from the wedding itself are harder to find.
“We planned for it to be traditional, but we’re not like that, so we tried to create those moments. We jumped the broom and had a salt ceremony (where the bride and groom individually pour salt into a glass container, symbolizing their lives becoming one.) But honestly, still, nothing was traditional about it.”
She goes on to explain that her mom caught the holy ghost coming down the aisle, her glam team was on deck, and she became so nervous with excitement that she had an anxiety attack – something she struggled with for years, she explains tearfully. Her friends had to literally cheer her down the aisle because of how overwhelmed she felt until she eventually calmed down.
“Skyh was standing there with his hand on his heart; we have our own little language, and I could feel the support,” she shares.
It was surprising to hear all these emotional moments happened before the party we saw online. That is until she once again got into the backstory.
“As a Black woman actress, for so long, it was popular to be mysterious and secretive, but that’s not who I am or what I like. Plus, we both wanted to create an experience for everyone there. We are the people who always host family and friends,” she says. “Like for me, the first order of business was getting sandals for the women so they can dance all night long. We had oxtail, D'ussé, and a coffee and sativa lounge – which is part of Skyh and I’s lifestyle and routine. We wanted to bring them into our world.”
Skyh Black (L) and KJ Smith (R)
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
She went on to discuss the dance routine she did for her husband at the reception, which has taken over the internet. Apparently, that’s another thing that didn’t go according to plan. According to KJ, she had promised a performance at their joint bachelor/ bachelorette party, but her outfit got stolen from her car. So, Skyh ended up performing for her – complete with a strip tease. Still, she never forgot her promise to dance for him.
So, she hired her friend as a choreographer, learned the routine, made friends and family watch it endless times, and attended Beyoncé’s Renaissance show a few days before for a confidence boost. It ended up being a show to remember. But that wasn’t all the night offered. Lil Mo performed, and the guests received special goody bags featuring their favorite Black-owned products like journals, hair care, and more.
“We made sure everyone was taken care of all night. That kind of stuff makes us happy. I wanted everyone there to experience the joy and love I have for myself, my partner, and for them. I wanted them to feel full and whole, and they had the time of their lives,” she says.
But naturally, the internet is going to internet, and while there were countless people praising the event and applauding the newlyweds, some thought it was too over the top. I was curious to know her thoughts on some of the criticism.
“It’s cool. We did what we wanted to do. I’ve decided to share my world with people. Just how I went on social media platforms and found inspiration, I want people to do the same,” she explains. “I don’t think it's fair to my supporters not to give that out. There’s so much I wanna share with brides, specifically Black brides. I love that people are adding it to their Pinterest boards."
"I wanted everyone there to experience the joy and love I have for myself, my partner, and for them. I wanted them to feel full and whole, and they had the time of their lives."
KJ Smith
Photo by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
“I’m happy with it because we did what we wanted to do. They can do what they wanna do. Don’t be cruel, though, because you will get blocked,” she said, laughing.
The more I spoke with her, the more her sense of freedom shined through. People are always going to have their opinions, but at the end of the day, it’s you who has to live your life, and it seems like the couple realizes that and embraces that power. She also stressed the importance of not living for others and the lessons life has taught her.
“I’ve been to countless weddings, and I’ve been in countless weddings. I’m a generally older bride. So when women in my demographic get married, and you and your husband are busy working people like us, you deserve to have the one you want to have,” she shares.
“This is what we wanted to do. Our loved ones love and support us. We did so much to honor them, but we also wanted to start our own tradition, legacy, and creation. I'm not going to be pulled back into ideas of the past when I’m trying to create a future with my partner. “
If you’d like to see more of the couple, you probably won’t have to wait long. Although no content is planned yet, she admits to being an oversharer. “Me being open and transparent about my experiences lets people know it’s okay to have flaws; it makes you human, and for many years, I didn’t believe that was okay. I had pressure to be perfect, and I’d crumble every time,” she explains to xoNecole.
Now, she owns her flaws and uses them as a superpower to connect with her community and feel and express her love.
“Some people give us [Skyh and KJ] a hard time because they say we just seem too perfect. I’m like, why is that a bad thing? I love the people I love. From my man to my mama, to my friends - unabashedly. We move through time and space how we want to move. If we did it another way, we’d let ourselves and our union down.”
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Feature image by Stanley Babb/ Stanlo Photography
Ciara's Prayer Is Cool, But What About A Prayer To Find Your Tribe?
We, as women, pray to God for the type of husband we want, but do we pray for the type of friends we need? Many women often imitate singer Ciara’s prayer, hoping it will, too, lead them to their “Russell Wilson” – an equally yoked partner.
Yes, finding a life partner is a dream many hold close to their hearts, but how often do we put the same energy into asking for the friends that resonate with our souls? As with romantic relationships, our circle of friends can make or break us. Therefore, it is important to pray for our "tribe" with as much intention as we do for a life partner.
Our friends aren't just companions for brunches and spa days. They deeply influence our daily decisions, shape our outlook on life, and play a crucial role in our emotional well-being. True friends can elevate our spirits during life's troughs and cheer us on during its peaks. On the other hand, friendships that harbor negativity or toxicity can sap our energy, hinder our aspirations, and diminish our self-worth. This underscores the imperative of surrounding ourselves with the right tribe, a circle that fosters growth, ensures mental well-being, and champions genuine happiness.
Wouldn’t you want to be seen as a prize by your friends, like you wish to be seen as one by your future man?
Ciara
When Ciara navigated the painful waters of her breakup with rapper Future, the “Level Up” singer didn’t leave her future to chance; she envisioned her ideal partner. She actively, consciously, and spiritually prayed for the type of man she wanted as a partner. This wasn't just about a rebound or a short-term fix. It was about intention, clarity, and knowing her worth. The universe answered in the form of Russell Wilson, a beacon of their love story many now admire.
And after years of women wondering what exactly she said in her prayers, she finally revealed it. The singer recorded her purported prayer on Summer Walker’s sophomore album, “Still Over It,” released in November 2021.
Her words had social media in a chokehold, as women and men alike uttered her words in every relationship video they would post.
Choosing Your Friends Wisely
It is pivotal for us to visualize the friends we desire. Consider: Are they genuinely supportive? Are they the kind of friends who push us forward without pushing us down? Do they offer loyalty without conditions? By detailing these attributes in our prayers or intentions, we offer a roadmap to the universe, directing it to the companions we seek.
While it might be tempting to seek out friends who fit into societal molds of “fun” or “popular,” genuine connection demands more. We should crave friendships that go beyond the superficial, where understanding transcends words, where challenges breed growth, and where loyalty isn't seasonal. It's not merely about someone to share mimosas with but about nurturing connections that understand and amplify our life's journey.
When our tribe aligns with our spirit, the transformation is holistic. With the right friends, our confidence doesn't just grow; it soars. We're exposed to broader perspectives, and our horizons expand beyond the familiar. The positivity emanating from such a tribe influences every corner of our lives, creating ripples of change and growth.
However, you must also ensure you’re ready for what you’re praying for. In my opinion, it is unfair to ask God to deliver friends who pour into you, but you do not pour into them. While prayer sets our intentions, our actions seal the deal. Seeking the right tribe means putting ourselves in environments that reflect our values and interests. Whether attending themed events, volunteering for a cause close to our hearts, or joining groups with shared interests, our actions echo our prayers, resonating with the universe.
Embarking to find the perfect partner holds depth, but equally significant is the odyssey of curating our tribe. The right friends don't just accompany us; they shape our lives in unparalleled ways. When we direct our intentions and actions toward finding our tribe, we aren't merely forming bonds; we're crafting our destiny. The adage goes: "Show me your friends, and I'll unveil your future." Elevate your tribe to a priority, nurture those bonds, and behold the transformative magic unfold.
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Feature image by FG Trade/ Getty Images