

Anyone who says that penis size doesn't matter is lying. If you've got a penis, or you have sex with a penis, you know that certain sizes and shapes feel better than others. There isn't a right or a wrong size, nor a good or a bad. All penises are great, no matter the size, but there are some pros and cons for each.
Here are some sex tips for every sized penis.
Sex With a Small Penis
Men with smaller penises are often much harder when erect than those with a large penis – as the blood flow has less space to fill. I don’t know about you but a harder penis equals a good time to me.
The Pros of Sex With a Small Penis:
Better and more attentive lovers
Quiet as it’s kept, small penises can be more enjoyable than larger ones. Almost every tiny dicked dude I've had sex with was a better lover than his big penis counterpart. Guys with less-than-average penises tend to have a lot to prove, and who am I to try and stop them?
Better for anal play
When it comes to anal sex, size most definitely matters. Most women complain that anal hurts. A bigger penis tends to be too much for butt sex. I’m way more excited to have anal sex when I see that the guy doesn’t have a third leg. Small penises are ideal for backdoor fun because they don’t cause pain, tearing, bleeding, or discomfort.
Easier to make adjustments
You can always make a small penis larger, but you can’t make a large penis smaller. With sex toys such as penis extenders any penis can become a bigger penis. Penis extenders are external devices that stretch the penis to make it longer. You can also use a cock ring to create a firmer, bigger erection. As well as penis pumps—a vacuum pump— that can temporarily grow a penis up to an inch in both length and girth.
The Cons of Sex With a Small Penis:
Limited range of motion
Smaller penises tend to “fall out” more often, creating a limitation in the type of sexual positions they can perform. Positions like doggystyle and spooning are great positions that will give maximum access. As a general rule, people with smaller penises should stick with positions that facilitate deep penetration, to utilize the entire shaft length.
Koldunova_Anna/Getty Images
Sex With a Average Penis
Random fact, most men are average. The average penis in America is just over 5 inches. Only 15% of all men have penis larger than 7 inches and just a tiny 2% are bigger than 8 inches, as documented in a study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine. So by these statistics, most men have an average normal penis of about 5 inches. But average doesn’t have to mean bad, in fact, when it comes to sex, its a good thing.
The Pros of Sex with an Average Penis:
Works with most positions
If a guy is on the smaller or bigger side, certain positions can be tough. If he’s in the average range, the world is your sexual oyster and you can pretty much try anything without too much discomfort.
More comfortable
Average penises just feel better. Contrary to popular belief, most of us don’t enjoy having our cervix banged up. Average sized penis fits more comfortably in the cervix. Never have I ever heard someone say that sex was painful from an average penis. The most sensitive part of the vagina is the lower part, and a man with an average penis will have no problem reaching it. He can cause all of the pleasure without all the length.
Better blow jobs
It is a lot easier to perform oral on a man with an average penis than on a man with a larger or smaller one. When he’s average, you don't have to worry about it fitting in your mouth or gagging and they’re easier to deep throat.
The Cons of Sex With an Average Penis:
I see none! Moving right along!
tenkende/Getty Images
Sex With a Large Penis
For some people size really does matter. Although size has no bearing on its ability to give and receive pleasure some people just prefer bigger. The bigger, the better. There's nothing wrong with that, we all have preferences. To each their own.
The Pros of Sex With a Large Penis:
Never will be too small
A lot of men worry about being big enough to please a woman. By now we all know that it's not the size of the boat that matters but the motion in the ocean. Skill trumps size any day, but at least if you have a large penis you won’t have to worry about a partner finding you to be too small.
Easier orgasms for some partners
Whether from just the excitement or from actually being stimulated more, some people find it easier to climax with a larger penis. In particular, a thicker penis will provide more of a "stretching" and "filling" feeling. Girthy penises can stimulate the G spot without the use of specific positions or angles. For women a longer penis can also reach the posterior and anterior fornices, which can be very stimulating.
The Cons of Sex With a Large Penis:
Too big
Big penises sound fun on paper but in real life, bigger is not always better. There is such a thing as "too big." That might be a hard thing to accept, and what constitutes as too big differs for each person. Having sex with someone with a too big penis can be painful.
Foreplay and lube are mandatory
I'll always advocate for the importance of foreplay in sex with any size of the penis. There's so much more to good sex than just thrusting of dick in and out. When you have a partner with a larger penis foreplay becomes mandatory. Lube is also mandatory; very few women produce nearly enough natural lubricant to handle the sustained action of a thick penis.
Limited sex positions
Excess length poses a real problem with heterosexual sex: vaginas are not bottomless pits and the cervix at the back end is for most women very sensitive. This means that certain positions like the ever-popular doggystyle are off limits, but sex positions like cowgirl and missionary are better suited because they avoid thrusting too deep.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by LaylaBird/Getty Images
- Penis Size Doesn't Matter To Me - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love ... ›
- Why Can't I Orgasm During Sex? Inconsistent Orgasms - xoNecole ... ›
- 10 Ways To Make Using A Condom So Much More Pleasurable ›
- What To Do When Your Partner Is Too Big And Sex Is Painful ›
- Penis Size Doesn't Matter To Me - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image screenshot/ xoNecole YouTube
There’s caviar, and then there’s Black-owned caviar. With the recent explosion of #CaviarTikTok, this luxury delicacy seems to be everywhere these days. I can’t scroll through my feed without seeing our favorite celebs and influencers diving headfirst into extravagant caviar spreads.
From Rihanna pairing her caviar with chicken nuggets (I wonder if our Fenty queen shares with RZA and Riot Rose or if this is just for mama) to Bethenny Frankel educating us on caviar with her series "Caviar University," there’s just no escaping it.
And let’s not forget the elite king himself, DeAndre Brown, indulging in fried chicken and caviar! From videos with caviar-topped burgers, potato latkes, deviled eggs, and pasta dishes—folks are topping everything with caviar. Yet, I had not come across any Black-owned caviar brands until I discovered Caviar Dream.
My Introduction Into Caviar
I started off eating caviar in undergrad on top of sushi, exploring with a variety of roe and tobiko but as an adult, I knew I was ready to try something a little more refined. The first time I fell in love with caviar was in grad school at a southern Italian restaurant in Flatiron.
I tried an appetizer that featured caviar on bruschetta, served with thick garlic bread and burrata cheese, and from that moment, I was hooked. That has become my favorite way to enjoy caviar next to this filet mignon crostini appetizer that I served recently at a dinner party.
Everything You Need To Know About Caviar Dream
Caviar Dream
Courtesy of Yasmine Jameelah
Caviar Dream is the first nationally distributed Black- and woman-owned caviar business, redefining how people experience caviar. Founded by Kendra Anderson, a Chicago-based chef and sommelier, the company’s mission is to make caviar more accessible and inclusive, breaking down barriers and demystifying this delicacy.
What Caviar I Tried
Caviar Dream Kaluga Hybrid ($105-$420 depending on the ounce)
How I Experienced The Caviar:
For this review, I opted for a more traditional approach by pairing Caviar Dream's Kaluga Hybrid with crème fraîche, blinis, and my favorite Black-owned champagne, Le KOOL Champagne by Robert Kool Bell.
My Caviar Dream spread
Courtesy of Yasmine Jameelah
My Honest Review:
I do not say this lightly - this was by far the best caviar I’ve ever had in my life. It was buttery, had no aftertaste, and truly felt as luxurious as it looked.
Prior to this, my favorite caviar was Imperial Caviar. I’ve tried many brands, from well-known to affordable, while recreating my favorite decadent appetizers at home or enjoying caviar bumps at parties with my friends and they were my favorite until now.
Caviar Dream boasts that chefs are obsessed with this versatile hybrid, which tastes more expensive than it actually is—and they were right. This buttery caviar would pair well with any recipe, especially if you’re looking to impress someone or even treat yourself.
As a Black woman, a business owner, and someone who understands that an extension of financial wellness is circulating our dollars, I recognize the importance of incorporating Black-owned businesses throughout every aspect of my life. From my skincare to my favorite sustainable wine, my bank, and even indulgent experiences like caviar, it matters.
As we celebrate culinary innovation and expand our palates, let’s also take the extra step to support Black-owned businesses while doing it. So the next time you’re tempted by the allure of caviar, order from Caviar Dream—it just might become your new favorite.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by Peter Dazeley/ Getty Images