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Unpopular Opinion: Size Doesn’t Matter to Me
When you think about what makes a man “it" for you, does the size of his d**k really matter?
I find myself revisiting this question time and time again in my love life. For most women, the element that elevates sex into great sex territory is the size of a man's package as it is often quite telling of the quality of his delivery.
I was one of those women way back when. I drank the Kool-Aid and believed the hype that the BBC category on Pornhub and conversations with girlfriends over drinks projected.
Bottom line, size mattered. And if he wasn't packing, sex was going to be subpar at best. There was no way a 5 and below could do what I imagined in my mind an 8 or above could do. But, my first experience with an 8 or above told me a different story.
Like most men, Guy A talked about how big it was to me prior to us actually doing the deed and I believed he was probably exaggerating like most men who say they're “big" do. But a week or two later, he proved to me (and my roommates at the time) that he was every bit of the 9 ½ inches that he said he was. My eyes widened and I giggled with glee from anticipation of having him fill me completely. I would quickly learn that in order to enjoy sex with a big d*ck, you have to adjust and became accustomed to his size (riding is absolutely out of the question, but if you can take it, doggy will probably be the most adventurous you can be the first time around).
Ain't no one night stand over here bih.
What's more, I learned that because guys with above-average penis sizes have SO much length, they don't necessarily think they have to work as hard for the pleasure that they illicit from you – i.e., the stroke game can err to the side of being weak as hell. However, that won't stop you from shrieking loudly every time his head repeatedly high-fives your cervix throughout the encounter. Pain and pleasure's thin line will challenge your senses and not necessarily for the better. Whereas a big d*ck seemed good in theory, in reality? Not so much.
I'd actually like to add my coins to the collection plate of d*ck size thoughts and say that size doesn't actually matter. At least, not when it comes to having a partner that knows how to lay it down. In the pursuit of great sex, the connection will always matter more.
In the pursuit of great sex, the connection will always matter more.
For that reason, and another big d*ck beau that came shortly after him that resulted in a similar lackluster feeling – albeit the high-fives to my cervix, I decided to revisit my question of if size mattered to me. The real answer to that question was further emboldened in me with one of my more recent beaus.
I was so close to eliminating him completely after the first time we made love, just because of his size alone.
The package didn't match the sender. Given his height and stature, I overestimated what Guy B would look like unwrapped and erect. In all actuality, he was far below average. It made our first time together very awkward. I couldn't move much because he had a certain angle he had to hit so that he didn't slip out, among other things. So, I not only felt underwhelmed, I felt constrained. If I hadn't grown to like him so much as a person, I would have cut him off then and there. However, I also remembered that while sometimes sex is amazing and earth-shattering and all of those intense adjectives you want it to be the first time around, other times love has to be practiced in order to be made perfect.
And I was right.
The second time far exceeded anything that was the first time. It was much more passionate, much less hurried. We were able to work together in achieving a rhythm because he relinquished some of his control and allowed himself to just be with me in the moment instead of so focused on the mechanics of it. I still felt filled, despite his size and the connection I felt reminded me of the ex I had let go of. By the third time we had sex, he was able to make me orgasm vaginally – something I had only done with one other person in my life. Baby, I was amazed.
So, while I previously scoffed at the idea that a small d*ck could EVER take me to the finish line, I was quickly put on hush mouth as I felt that familiar build up in my body release and let go as the sea of pleasure washed over me.
I more than finished, I arrived.
The act of laying it down can be done just as skillfully with a five or below as it can with a BBC. Size is relative and sex is deeper than any length his package brings to the table. Sex is about connection first and foremost. Honesty and respect next. Chemistry after that. And way, way, way down on the list where it's almost nonexistent should be size. When he knows what to do with it, the rest is history.
The act of laying it down can be done just as skillfully with a five or below as it can with a BBC.
Besides, small d*cks matter too.
Do you think size matters? Let us know in the comments down below.
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This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
Feature image courtesy
Blair Underwood Initially Turned Down 'Sex And The City' Because 'It Was About How Samantha Was Fascinated By Dating A Black Man’
Actor and heartthrob Blair Underwood is opening up about why he turned down Sex and the City the first time he was offered a role. Many fans of the HBO series may recall Blair's time on the show in which his character was dating Miranda (Cynthia Nixon). However, he was previously offered another role where his character would date Samantha (Kim Cattrall).
During his interview with AV Club, the Set It Off star revealed that he was uncomfortable with the initial offer due to the character's fascination with him being a Black man.
“I actually did say ‘no’ the first time,” he said. “The first time they had offered the role, to be honest with you, it was about how Samantha was fascinated by dating a Black man and wanted to know if, uh, all of the rumors were true about our anatomy! And I said, ‘Listen, I’m honored, thank you, but I just don’t want to play a character based on race, on curiosity about a Black man.'”
But that didn't stop them from reaching out again. This time he was offered to play Dr. Robert Leeds, the love interest to Miranda and he decided to go for it. "So they were nice enough to call about a year later, and I said, 'Well, is it gonna be about race?' And they said, 'No, no, no, we’re not even gonna mention race!' And I think it really did only come up maybe once," he recalled.
"It did five episodes, and I think Samantha mentioned it once, saying something about 'a Black doctor' that Miranda was dating. And that’s really been a consistent thing in my career: not wanting to be boxed as 'the Black guy.'
"I’ve had that conversation with many producers along the way, and they were so great. They said, 'No, he’s just a doctor who Miranda meets in the elevator, and they have a nice little fling.' And it was amazing."
Blair has had a wide-ranging career playing everything from a lawyer on L.A. Law to playing Madame CJ Walker's husband on Self Made: Inspired by the Life of Madame CJ Walker. And during his interview, he revealed another role that he initially turned down, Set It Off. The movie, which is considered a classic in Black culture, stars Queen Latifah, Jada Pinkett Smith, Vivica A. Fox, and Kimberly Elise. Blair's character, Keith, played a banker and love interest to Jada's character, Stony.
He explained why he said no at first and eventually accepted the offer. "I had initially said “no” to that. Because I was playing this historic, iconic African-American historical figure in Jackie Robinson, and the time, y’know, there was Boyz N The Hood, and Menace II Society was out there, and I’d finished playing this noble Negro… [Laughs]," he said.
"And I’m reading the script, and there’s a scene where Jada Pinkett’s character—Jada Pinkett-Smith now—was going to sell her body so she could make some money to send her brother to college. And I remember, honestly, I threw the script across the room. I was, like, “I don’t want to do this. I want to do something uplifting for the Black culture and Black characters, and I don’t know if I want to see this.”
After a conversation with the movie's director F. Gary Gray and the actor's manager encouraging him to finish reading the script, Blair had a change of heart. What he first thought about the movie turned out to be totally different.
"So I finished the script, and I saw that the character they were asking me to play was really the love story in the midst of all of this turmoil of all of these characters, the four ladies: Queen Latifah, Vivica Fox, Kimberly Elise, and Jada," he explained.
"It was so well-written, it was such a great platform for them. And to be able to play the love story and the storyline that gave Jada’s character a leg up and a way out of this world, something to hope for, to wish for, someone to love her… I said, 'You know what? I’d like to be a part of that.'
"And I’m so glad I did, because that film resonates to this day. People all the time come up to me and say that they love that movie. So I’m glad that I did it."