There are a lot of women who really, really enjoy breast play so much that they can reach orgasm through nipple stimulation alone, while others need breast play in conjunction with genital stimulation. According to a study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, sensation from the nipples travels to the same part of the brain as sensations from the vagina, clitoris and cervix. How cool would it be to learn how to please your partner by simply playing with their breasts? Well, lucky for you, I have some techniques here to get you started.
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Focus on the areola.
Areolas surround the nipple and are more sensitive than the nipple itself. You should focus on the upper quadrant of her breast, between 10 and 2 o'clock. It’s the most sensitive part of the bull’s eye. Stroke the nipple and circle the areola gently with a finger, or circle the nipple with your thumb and forefinger.
Use your mouth...
If the nipples are erect, use your tongue to draw circles around them. You can alternate between licking and sucking the nipple. Use your lips, tongue, and teeth, as well as your hands to lick, suck, and nibble on them. Use your tongue to flick the nipple a few times before slowly and gently taking it into your mouth. You can also get some temperature play going by licking a breast and lightly blowing on the moistened spot. Start gently, and gradually increase the pressure until you find what works for your partner if he or she enjoys a lot of pressure.
But, don’t bite.
Never bite someone’s nipple without consent. Nipples are sensitive AF and everyone doesn’t think pain is pleasure. You do not want to interrupt a good time by doing that. Before nibbling or pulling on her nipple, ask, “Do you want more?” or “Harder?”
Build the intensity.
Nipples are similar to clitorises: some people can barely stand direct contact, while others require strong pressure. Just like the clitoris, it's best to begin gently, then work your way up to more pressure. If they want more intensity, gently pinch the nipples between your thumb and forefinger.
You can gradually increase the pressure, and ask them to let you know when it goes too far. You can also gently twist the nipples, but be careful with this move since it's pretty intense. You can also cup the breast in your hand and gently pull on the nipple with your thumb and forefinger.
Don’t forget the toys.
For new sensations on the breasts, you can use vibrators or feather ticklers. Silk ties or scarves can feel great too. If your partner prefers intense nipple play, you can buy nipple clamps or suckers. In addition, you can blindfold your partner and use different toys or materials to touch It. You can also apply lube or massage oil to help your hands really slide around on their breasts.
Combine breast foreplay with clitoral stimulation.
In order to achieve the best nipplegasm, combine nipple stimulation with stimulation of the clitoris. Start stimulation through your mouth while simultaneously using your hands or a sex toy like a vibrator to tease the clitoris.
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A study by EdenFantasies found that one-third of Americans in relationships are unhappy with their sex life, which tells me more people should make sex a part of their resolutions. Sex resolutions are just like regular resolutions. You make them after reflecting on the past and deciding how you want things to be different in the future. A good sex resolution is one that makes sex more comfortable, pleasurable, and exciting. This could mean taking a whole new approach to the bedroom or just swapping out some old toys for new ones.
This year along with my usual New Year, New Me resolutions, I’m including resolutions that deal specifically with improving my sex life and I want you to add some too. Here are some sex resolutions we all can incorporate this year to have a better more fulfilled sex life this year and for years to come.
1.Stop faking orgasms.
naked orgasm GIFGiphyIn the name of everything sacred, please don't fake it anymore. If you do nothing else on this list in 2023, promise yourself and me that this will be the one thing you’ll do. In truth, faking orgasms causes more harm than good, because it's a lie. Your partner won't be able to improve if you're constantly lying to them. Rather than faking it, talk about it instead. Talk with your partner about your needs and/or what you dislike about sex and work together to improve it.
2.Have more sex outside the bedroom.
This year, have more sex outside the bedroom. A simple change in location can spice up your old routine and make sex feel exciting again. According to research from House Method, sex outside the bedroom may even help your relationship and sex life. They conducted a survey and found that people who were having sex outside the bedroom reported having more sex, more relationship satisfaction, and more sexual satisfaction.
3.Explore your fantasies.
Fantasy Ludacris GIFGiphySex in public? Threesomes? BDSM? Fantasy is not just for children. Whatever your fantasies are, there are healthy ways to explore them. Exploration is a great teacher that reveals who we are, what excites us, and how colorful our imagination can be. Fantasies don’t have to be taboo secrets that we keep hidden away, rather they should be embraced. Repeat after me: It’s okay for me to pretend.
4.Buy a new sex toy.
The new year is the perfect time to try something new—why not try a sex toy? Whether you have a penis or vulva, there is a sex toy designed solely for your pleasure. Sex toys are meant to be used in collaboration, not competition. Although, most sex toys can be used solo, adding them into the mix with a partner can bring added excitement.
5.Take a sex class.
ciara dancing GIFGiphyAny skill you want to learn can be taught in a class. For example, if you wanted to learn how to speak Chinese, you would enroll in a Chinese class. As teenagers, when we wanted to learn to drive, we took driver’s ed. The same applies to sex as well. Truth is, we all have room for improvement, and what better way to brush up on our skills than with a sex class? Contrary to popular belief, people do not just “know” how to have great sex, they are taught. Great sex is more practice than skill. So, just like a cooking class to improve your kitchen skills, sex classes improve your bedroom skills. Fortunately for all of us, there are plenty of sex classes available IRL and online to help improve our performance.
6.Masturbate more.
There are SO many health benefits to masturbation. Stress reduction. Better sleep. Fewer headaches. And of course orgasms! Masturbation isn’t just for single people. In fact, regular masturbation can bring back your sex drive, whether you're exploring on your own or with someone else. Masturbation strengthens the pleasure pathways in your brain, which make it easier to locate them.
7.Get tested at least once a year.
safe sex condom GIF by 89.7 BayGiphyThis is the most important resolution on the list. As sexually active adults, whether married or single, it’s important for us to know our status and get tested yearly. As long as you're sexually active, you should be tested for STDs at least once a year. If you have more than one partner, share intravenous (IV) needles, or don't always practice safer sex by using a condom each time you have intercourse, you should be tested every three to six months. Don’t put your sexual health in the hands of someone else this year, get tested!
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But what if the person you're with doesn't know what they're doing down there? Like with any sexual act, eating pussy can be taught. From incorporating toys to trying different positions, to using your tongue in unique ways, there are many examples of how to improve your oral sex technique. However, I believe the best tips for eating pussies come from people who have them.
So I asked around for tips from real women on how to have amazing cunnilingus. This is what the women I talked to had to say.
1. "Start slowly unless I indicate otherwise."
Kateryna Hushylo/ Getty Images2. "Oral health matters. I have patients who frequently have yeast infections and bacterial vaginosis because their partners have terrible oral care."
3. "Eat it like a very ripe mango (like when it’s a 'lil mushy) but more softly and only with your lips and tongue."
4. "Lift the [clitoral] hood! Start slow, don’t be too aggressive. The clitoris [says] please and thank you."
5. "Don't go straight for the clitoris. Warm her up. Kiss the lips like they are on her face; lots of tongue and saliva. Suck everything; lips, clit...all the things."
6. "Circle your tongue at the opening of the vagina. Slowly, like [you're] looking for something— get lost, King."
7. "Trigger points are apparently on the mons [pubis]... I was shook and I don't know what she did, but babayyyy."
8. "If you not suffocating a little bit and gotta come up for air, you not doing it right."
9. "Never underestimate the power of slipping a finger or two inside her (thoroughly cleaned) to help with the fun."
10. "Be tf soft! Soften that tongue, them lips, that finger, all that shit. Make it soft!"
Volodymyr Bushmelov /Getty Images
11. "Every vulva you meet enjoys a different way to be a tasty treat. So ask your partner if you truly don’t know which way to go. Beginner tips: suck the clit, the vagina, and lick the lips. Oh, and make it juicy. Nobody likes dry lips."
12. "Please be patient! The climax will not be instantaneous and typically will not happen expeditiously. In addition, if she says she’s almost there… DO NOT change that motion/sensation/stroke/whatever…'cause then you gotta start again to build [it] up.:
13. "Build up before going down on her. Don’t go all in. Slow down. Use your hands. Tell me I taste good, encourage me, grab my belly, my thighs, move what you gotta move out the way, and do it with honor. Don’t stuff her like a chicken. Tell her to come hither."
14. "Listen to your partner, and pay attention to not just words but what the body responds to. Ask questions like 'What do you like?' 'What feels good?' Also, eat it like it’s your last meal."
15. "For the love of everything that is good, please flatten your tongue!"
16. "When I say, 'Ooh, right there. Don’t stop.' That means wherever your mouth is, don’t stop licking right there."
17. "Ask. What. She. Likes. Can’t fail if you ask the teacher for the answers."
18. "Wipe her off with a warm towel when she’s done."
19. "The best combo is to lick and suck slightly like you would spaghetti noodles. Put the clit in your mouth, roll it around your tongue clockwise, rinse and repeat…"
20. "Enthusiasm is key! Be aware of your partner’s pleasure responses and wetness. When you hear moans—do more of that. Lick, slurp, suck, kiss. Enjoy yourself while enjoying your partner enjoy you."
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His lifecast pieces included butts, breasts, vulvas, penises, and a few full-body casts. Among my favorites was the full-body cast of two lovers intertwined in a sex act. After falling in love with Andrew's work, I DM'd him to inquire about having my mold made.
The Man Behind the Mold
Andrew operates out of his garage in Huntsville, Alabama. It is filled with plasters, Hoyer lifts, benches, and everything needed to create the dynamic works of art he creates. Andrew, a NASA engineer by day, explained that he became interested in molding after he constructed a 3D volcano with his son for a school project. Lifecasting was born out of curiosity after he made a mold of his former girlfriend's ass to sell on Etsy.
Nowadays, Andrew sells his pieces in art shows around the world. His work has been exhibited in Las Vegas, Erotic Art Shows in Seattle and Detroit, as well as in London, England. Depending on the piece, his art sells for $300-$3500. If you prefer to do your own casting, he also sells at-home kits for $60.
Courtesy of Ashley Cobb
The Process
Usually, Andrew finds his models through Craigslist or word of mouth, rather than on Instagram as he did with me. Because his art pieces are so time-consuming and can require some flexibility, modeling for Andrew isn't an easy task. The entire process takes about 40 minutes. Essentially, I had to lay perfectly still for nearly an hour with my legs in stirrups, similar to a Gyno visit. I'm not sure about your legs, but my legs aren't used to holding that position for more than ten minutes. Talk about a workout!
He began by layering my pussy with an all-natural seaweed-type lubricant used as an alginate. The alginate also added a layer of protection between the plaster and my vulva. Pussies are sensitive and we can have plaster getting into them throwing off pHs and shit. He then added plaster and plaster bondages layer by layer in a similar manner to paper-mâché. There was a lukewarm, creamy texture to the plaster, similar to yogurt. As the plaster sets, it becomes slimy and feels like firm jello as it warms up.
Courtesy of Ashley Cobb
The Result
Once completely set, Andrew eased the plaster off of me. Since it wasn't sticky, it slipped right off. As Andrew de-molded, sanded and detailed my pussy mold, I went to the bathroom to wash off any remaining plaster. Typically, it would take Andrew several days to weeks to complete his molds and get them ready for sale. However, because I wasn’t selling mine, he completed it in a few hours.
I’m still not sure what I’m going to do with my pussy mold. I may paint it and hang it up on my wall. But then again, do I really want everyone who comes to my house looking at my pussy?
To find out more about Andrew and 3D Perceptions, visit www.etsy.com/shop/3DPerceptions.
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