

In xoNecole's Finding Balance, we profile boss women making boss moves in the world and in their respective industries. We talk to them about their business, their life, and most of all, what they do to find balance in their busy lives.
Kamie Crawford is more than meets the eye.
Her first-ever wave came in the form of competing in the Miss Maryland Teen USA pageant. There, she represented the state of Maryland and ended up walking away from the night with a crown. Kamie also did so while making history as the first contestant from Maryland to ever win the competition. "I applied and the rest was history!" she exclaimed in a conversation with xoNecole. "Being Miss Teen USA was an awesome experience, but I got what I needed from it and moved forward with my life and career."
In addition to being a diverse shade and size in the fashion world as a model, Kamie has been broadening her reach and expanding her talents as an on-air host; a passion she's been nurturing into her purpose since her late teens. Most recently, she's gained credits with the E! Network and MTV's Catfish underneath her hosting belt, where her compassionate and "real recognize real" persona made her an instant fan-favorite among the lineup of guest hosts that have co-piloted Nev's show since long-time co-host's Max Joseph's departure.
Despite the yes's she's acquired along her journey, the pathway to being Kamie Crawford hasn't been one without uncertainty or doubts. "Before I made the transition, I had never felt more lost. I didn't know where my career was going, but I made the decision to put it all in God's hands and manifest TF out of everything. Once I did that, I got the email about Catfish. Sometimes you have to realize that there is already a divine purpose for your life – so while you're busy making plans, you have to know in your heart that the path has already been paved for you, you just have to follow it where it leads."
Since then, abundance has manifested by the droves and it all started with taking a leap of faith and transitioning to life in LA. Nowadays, Kamie is a master of her own destiny and is finding time to balance brand deals and TV segments with SoulCycle and Netflix and chill. Here's how.
What does the average day/week look like for you?
Every week is different, which keeps it exciting. I usually have one or two "admin days" out of the week to strictly just answer emails, send invoices for brand deals, work out contracts for upcoming projects, plan out potential TV segment ideas or jot down some goals. If I'm filming during the week (like I am right now), I have to block off days for travel/filming or time to coordinate looks for on-camera. I also have days set aside for taking meetings or running errands and because I'm a Scorpio, me-time is essential!
What are your mornings like? How do you wind down at night?
Mornings, I will admit, are not my strong suit. If I'm not filming early, I like to sleep as much as I can. I try to wake up around 9am and get my day started, walk my dog, get my Starbucks fix in. Sometimes, I work out, sometimes I don't. I'm working on making my mornings more productive! At night I love to catch up on Netflix or Ru Paul's Drag Race, hang out with my boyfriend and our dog. Maybe drink some wine – it all depends on the day!
What do you find to be the most hectic part of your week?
Mondays and Tuesdays are usually the craziest just because there are so many emails coming in, but if I'm filming – I'm usually busy from Thursday to Monday. This is why I keep a physical and digital planner!
Do you practice any types of self-care?
SoulCycle is my self-care. I also just started boxing which is awesome, but outside of fitness I love to just detach. If I'm feeling stressed, I'll take a few hours and just be with myself and my own thoughts. I don't answer anyone's emails or calls and I regroup.
"If I'm feeling stressed, I'll take a few hours and just be with myself and my own thoughts. I don't answer anyone's emails or calls and I regroup."
What are some rituals you swear by in the name of self-care?
A scalding hot shower, a glass of wine and some great Chinese food usually does the trick for me!
How do you find balance with:
Love/Marriage?
I feel really lucky because my boyfriend and I both work in the entertainment industry. He's more behind the scenes, but he's always traveling with clients and we're coincidentally in the same place at the same time. One time I had to travel to Phoenix, AZ to film while he was in the same city for a music festival! It's always been like that and it really helps. It's also just great being with someone who gets the industry and my frustrations overall – we're constantly planning together and running ideas by each other, but even we have to set aside time with no phones and just enjoy one another.
Friends?
My best friends and I talk every single day. Group chats are a lifesaver! We're always connected digitally, but seeing each other often is a struggle just because we live in different areas now. Whenever we're in the same town though, it's like we never left. Low-maintenance friendships are key for me. We have to be able to pick right back up where we left off, even if we haven't seen each other in a few months! They're super busy and successful too, so we're all on the same page.
Exercise/Health? Do you ever detox?
I have spurts of being really super active and then I won't work out for like a week. I want to be better at that but if I'm not as active, I'm usually doing a better job at watching what foods I'm indulging in. I've done cleanses before, but I'm not really a fan. I own my faults and just try to make them better, but I don't like to put too much pressure on myself in that arena.
"Low-maintenance friendships are key for me. We have to be able to pick right back up where we left off, even if we haven't seen each other in a few months!"
When you are going through a bout of uncertainty, or feeling stuck, how do you handle it?
A good cry helps! I can be a perfectionist at times and a strong manifestor, so when things don't happen as soon as I'd like, or at all, I can feel down. I allow myself to feel crappy and then I move on. I don't believe in wallowing for too long because things can always be worse and I am very blessed. If it's something I can change, I fix it. If it's out of my hands, I give to God and go to sleep!
What does success mean to you?
Meeting my personal and professional goals. Having people by my side who support me and love me for who I am and just being a good human. All the money in the world can't replace kindness and genuine happiness.
Ultimately, how do you find balance?
Prayer and downtime. Clearing my brain completely and then starting fresh with new ideas and a new perspective.
For more of Kamie, follow her on Instagram.
Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
Watch the full episode below:
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by YouTube/xoNecole
'When You Build It, They Can’t Tell You You Can’t Sit': DJ Miss Milan, Marsai Martin & More Talk Confidence
The Marie Claire Power Play Summit wasn’t just another branded panel event—it was an inspiring, sometimes emotional, and always honest look at what it really takes to rise, thrive, and stay at the top. From Olympians to entrepreneurs, artists to execs, the room was full of powerful women sharing the real stories behind their highlight reels. I walked away moved by their vulnerability, strength, and refusal to dim their light.
Here are some of my favorite takeaways from three standout panels featuring Jordan Chiles, Marsai Martin, and Kandi Burruss.
Leveling Up Your A-Game with Jordan Chiles, Morgan Shaw Parker, Chelsea Fishman, Laura Correnti, and Tabitha Turner-Wilkins
Jordan Chiles
Paras Griffin/ Getty Images for Power Play
Olympic gymnast Jordan may have medals and magazine covers to her name, but her mindset is refreshingly grounded. “The day I finally feel pressure,” she said, “will be the day I know there’s still more for me to learn.” For her, joy—not pressure—is the fuel. Her confidence isn’t performative; it’s rooted in family, self-worth, and authenticity.
“Everything I’ve done in my career—tattoos, long nails, rocking my crew at the Olympics—that’s all me. It’s not because someone told me to do it. It’s because I felt confident doing it. And that’s where my ambition comes from: being my authentic self.”
For Morgan Shaw Parker, President & COO of the Atlanta Dream, the conversation around pressure went even deeper. “Legacy work” is how she described her mission—navigating male-dominated spaces, sometimes pregnant and pumping on NFL team planes. “After COVID and George Floyd,” she shared, “it became clear to me: vulnerability is power. You don’t have to show up perfect to lead.”
Chelsea Fishman, founder of Atlanta's first bar dedicated to women’s sports, Jolene Jolene, shared how the haters (especially the Reddit kind) were her confirmation: “All those comments saying it would fail—those were the signs that I was doing something right.” She’s hosted 25+ watch parties already and is building the very community they said would never come.
This panel also touched on ambition, authenticity, and owning your power—both in sneakers and in suits. One of the best mic-drop moments came when the moderator flipped the question: “What if we stopped making ‘power’ a bad word for women?” A nod-worthy reminder that we’re not here to play small.
Making Your Voice Heard with Marsai Martin, Carol Martin, Miss Milan, and Heather McMahan
Marsai Martin
Paras Griffin/ Getty Images for Power Play
This panel was a masterclass in staying grounded while growing up—or glamming up—on the global stage. Actress and producer Marsai talked about what it’s like to show up in high-pressure moments when your confidence is low but the world is still watching. From red carpets to long shoot days, she reminded us that even when you’re not at 100%, you still find a way to push through.
“There have been days where I wasn’t feeling the best, but I still had to show up on this carpet. Or it was that time of the month, but I still had to go on set. I just didn’t feel as confident—but it’s about how you take care of yourself in those moments and still keep pushing.”
Her mom and business partner Carol Martin dropped gems about motherhood and mentorship: “It’s like teaching your kid to ride a bike over and over again. Now the bike is a movie or a brand.” That balance between guiding and letting go? Not easy—but essential when you’re raising a mogul and running a company.
“There have been days where I wasn’t feeling the best, but I still had to show up on this carpet. Or it was that time of the month, but I still had to go on set. I just didn’t feel as confident—but it’s about how you take care of yourself in those moments and still keep pushing.”
Miss Milan, Grammy Award-winning DJ and Doechii’s right-hand woman, lit the crowd up with her no-nonsense energy. “I built my own table,” she said. “When you build it, they can’t tell you you can’t sit.” From journaling her dreams to manifesting Grammys, her story is one of resilience and intention—and a whole lot of faith in her own vision.
This panel didn’t shy away from hard truths either: the sadness that can come with success, the fear of fading relevance, the criticism that hits differently when it’s personal. But Marsai said it best: know your why. And let it evolve with you.
The Cost of Starting Your Own Business with Kandi Burruss and Nikki Ogunnaike
Kandi Burruss
Carol Lee Rose/ Getty Images for Marie ClaireKandi doesn’t sugarcoat the grind. From chart-topping songwriter to multi-business entrepreneur, she’s built her empire one risk—and one reinvention—at a time.
“Fear equals failure. If you don’t even try, you’ve failed automatically —and you did it to yourself. I’d rather take a risk and lose money than play it safe and never know what could’ve happened.”
She broke down the real costs of entrepreneurship: money, time, and emotional bandwidth. “You think you’re going to work less when you work for yourself?” she laughed. “You’re going to work more.” For Kandi, mommy guilt and financial setbacks are part of the package—but so is the satisfaction of seeing an idea through.
She opened up about scaling back on her clothing store and temporarily closing the original Old Lady Gang location. “It felt like failure,” she admitted, “but sometimes you have to step back to make things better.” Still, she’s not one to quit. She just pivots—with precision.
One of her most memorable reflections? How her music career hiccup led her to songwriting—ultimately writing the mega-hit “No Scrubs.” That song became the key to a new lane and legacy. “You may think you’re working on one dream,” she said, “but it could open the door to another.”
Also? Kandi wants you to stop emailing her from a Gmail. “You’re doing million-dollar business on a bootleg budget,” she joked. “Invest in yourself. Start with a domain name!”
The Marie Claire Power Play Summit was a powerful reminder that ambition, authenticity, and vulnerability aren’t separate traits—they work in tandem. Whether you’re building a bar, a brand, or a business from scratch, the key is to stay rooted in your voice, your story, and your why.
And if you need a sign to go for it? Consider this your green light.
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Feature image by Paras Griffin/ Getty Images for Power Play