

A few years ago, psychologists studied the correlation between seasons and romantic relationships. They concluded that the colder the weather, the more likely a relationship had a chance to thrive, hence, "cuffing season." Nevertheless, the warmer the weather, the more likely a relationship is to fail, consequently creating the term, "uncuffing season." "Uncuffing season" is defined as a period, usually the spring and summer, when "people who were previously in relationships during the winter break-up to be free for the summer and warm months." The idea is that once the relationship has concluded, one is able to play the field and not be tied down by the pestering obligations of a relationship. And unfortunately, this seems to be the case for the artists this week.
No longer singing about the best parts, we've entered in the phase of summertime sadness; and boy, is this summer scheduled to be a doozy. Between Leon Bridges' constant questions in "Why Don't You Touch Me," Nao's refusal to return to "Messy Love," and Cynthia Erivo choosing to remember only "The Good" parts of her relationship, it seems like everyone is being "uncuffed" and sent to enjoy their summers alone. Though, there might be light at the end of this tunnel yet. Why? Well, because if they're sent to join their summer's alone, chances are you are, too.
If that's the case, you'll have a couple of new ballads, and upbeat songs, that can help you make it through your summer blues, before finding yet another in the fall and winter months.
1. "Why Don't You Touch Me: Part 1" - Leon Bridges
With his new album Gold—Diggers Sound coming out July 23, 2021, Leon Bridges has arrived with part one of two singles, "Why Don't You Touch Me: Part 1" (you can listen to "Part 2" here). Like all of his other singles, Bridges' music feels like it has been written and sung by someone beyond his years. In "Why Don't You Touch Me: Part 1," Bridges wonders the title amongst other things, particularly why his lover doesn't seem to love him anymore.
Despite "dressin' to the nines" and his desires to do whatever to improve the relationship, Bridges' lover is distracted by the glitter and gold and continues to fade away. It's sad that his lover doesn't seem to be in love with him anymore, but the saddest part might be the fact that his relationship is ending and he doesn't even know why.
2. "Mad" - Hope Tala
To avoid the "Heartbreak Olympics," I won't say that one heartbreak is worse than the other. Although, when it comes to heartbreak, nothing quite matches the sting that comes from unrequited love. In Hope Tala's newest single "Mad," the 23-year-old London artist sings about having a lover fall out of love, while she is still head over heels. The song plays with an enticing allure, combining an acoustic guitar with a groove reminiscent of Bossa nova and a slowed samba, instead of a piano ballad.
As if her rage is simmering, Tala doesn't raise her voice, but allows her repetition of her wanting to tear her hair out to show her frustrations and sadness to her lover's sudden change in mind. At the end of the song, she is left with more questions than answers, which seems to be the new way of breaking up (a la the previously mentioned "Why Don't You Touch Me"). With her lover not answering her calls, it's hard to say if she'll get the closure she needs to extinguish her inevitable explosion.
3. "Messy Love" - Nao
After the early (leaked) release of her newest single, Nao has officially released "Messy Love" from her upcoming third album. Like her single "Make It Out Alive," in "Messy Love," Nao tells of a love that was once cherished turning into a burden. In a trope that I am glad to see artists taking, Nao decides to place self-love, self-respect, and inner peace over the struggles and insecurities created by an unstable and exhaustive relationship.
Old Nao might've had the energy to chase her lover, she might've had the energy to roll around and enjoy the mess of it all. Nevertheless, after one too many heartbreaks, Nao has reached a place in her life where she refuses to return back to "messy love."
She wants her love to know that she cares about him, but in the end, she will choose herself and her progress over everything, including this relationship.
4. "Wusyaname" - Tyler, the Creator ft. YoungBoy Never Broke Again & Ty Dolla Sign
Only Tyler, the Creator would walk up to a complete stranger and use "Aw, you look malnourished" as a pick-up line. Strangely for Tyler, the Creator, this seems well within his playbook and still might have the potential to work. In his recently released single "Wusyaname," Tyler, the Creator falls in love with a woman at first sight. Pursuing the woman, he hopes to get her attention by hurling insulting compliments one after the other. Creator's advancements are so contradictory that it wouldn't be surprising if this woman had experienced whiplash.
Although, after saying, "That's when I met 'She'"—a reference to his Goblin album and "She" track—it is clear to the audience that this woman probably deserves it. As if jumping into a time machine, the audience is given the moment that eventually leads to the chaotic moment that unravels in his and Frank Ocean's "She." In addition to this magic track, Tyler, the Creator's "Lumberjack" and "Brown Sugar Salmon" singles are out, too.
5. "2 You" - Mariah the Scientist
Something is in the water, and apparently it's forcing everyone to confront or end their relationships. Regardless of what it is, "2 You" is the newest single from Mariah the Scientist's upcoming project, Ry Ry World. In the song, the Atlanta-based artist reflects on a failed relationship. Pointing out her ex's flaws, Mariah addresses feeling disappointing in the direction of their relationship and embarrassment from allowing it to go on for so long. Unlike the singles mentioned before, Mariah the Scientist doesn't wonder why the relationship has ended or how they got there. Instead, she wonders why she doesn't feel at peace with this decision, despite knowing that it was for the best.
6. "BYE" - Jaden
Most artists have something that makes them uniquely and utterly them. For instance, SZA has her word play. J. Cole has his storytelling. Kendrick Lamar has his poetic prose and Jaden has his…well, everything? When I say this, I don't mean it negatively, I mean that Jaden is never the same person when a single is released. This is even shown in his name change from Jaden Smith, to just Jaden. For most artists, the constant change between genres, flow, writing, and artistry wouldn't work. It would make the listener feel like they are following too many artists at once. But for Jaden, it seems to be the main thing keeping his artistry afloat.
In his newest single, "BYE" Jaden ventures to the beach in hopes of repairing his broken relationship. Despite its melancholy theme, the song comes off as a light summer pop/hip-hop track, which juxtaposes the song released from the previous album. Although the songs from Syre are hip-hop tracks, "BYE" leans more into the pop genre with its layered harmonies and almost synthetic voice.
7. "t r a n s p a r e n t s o u l" - WILLOW ft. Travis Barker
There is a special kind of wonderful when a Black woman is in the alternative/indie genre. There is an even more special kind of wonderful when she seems like she'll dominate the genre, if given the chance. Returning with Blink 182 drummer, Travis Baker, Willow Smith has released a new hit, "Transparent Soul." The single is mixture of the early 2000s alternative/rock and 80s grunge, with a new 2021 spin. Her voice is powerful and dominating as she sings about being able to see through all of the lies of her subject. Whether she is talking to a lover, former friend, or just an over confident stranger, Willow puts her subject in their place as she tries to navigate between friends and foe.
8. "Pasadena" - Tinashe ft. Buddy
I just can't stop smiling when I hear this song. This is a bop, a groove, a shimmy, and a shake.. Ahead of her fifth album, Tinashe returns with her exhilarating new single "Pasadena." This upbeat track focuses on the pride and joy one obtains when they live freely and embrace the moment. With a fun video filled with group dancing, penthouses, and a beautiful skyline, "Pasadena" has the potential to be a song you need on repeat this summer.
9. "Bed Friend" - Jacquees ft. Queen Naija
With his newest single from his new album P.T.O.F, Jacquees and Queen Naija team up to tell the story of friends who've become lovers. Unlike the typical "friends with benefits" set up, Jacquees talks about falling in love with his best friend while still being in a relationship with another. He knows that his desire for his friend over his girlfriend is wrong, but he can't seem to stop making comparisons and he can't seem to want to invest in his relationship because of this. He is aware that he and his best friend are moving past the boundaries of their friendship, though, despite this knowledge he leans fully in, hoping that the relationship "doesn't end in a dead in." After all, if this doesn't work out, Jacquees is aware that he has more to lose than just "Bed Friend."
10. "The Good" - Cynthia Erivo
The last five years have been kind to Cynthia Erivo. Between her discovery in London, her Tony, Grammy, and Emmy awards, her roles in blockbuster movies (Harriet, Bad Times at the El Royale, and Widows), and the Aretha Franklin mini series, she has shown that hard work truly pays off. Now, she is tackling another milestone, this one in the form of her upcoming debut album. From Ch. 1 vs. 1, Erivo has released her newest single "The Good." The song tells a story about a failed relationship, but instead of mourning its absence, she choose to remember the good times. Despite the somber lyrics, the song is upbeat and almost playful while she sings soulfully and powerfully. Released during Pride Month, Erivo's video has her in a tumultuous same-sex relationship, which is rarely seen between two Black women, unless you're counting the recent season of Masters of None.
Keep scrolling for more singles released in the week of June 18 to June 25!
"Feeling Good" - Chloe Bailey
"Talk About It" - Jungle
"Letter to My Daughter" - NLE Chopper
"Live from the Country" - Logic
"Wish List" - Joey Trap
"Muddy Flow" - Kill Jasper
"Genesis" - Azizi Gibson ft. AKTHESAVIOR
"You the Type" - CJ Fly
DaBaby - "Ball If I Want To"
"LAW OF AVERAGES" - Vince Staples
"Angles" - Wale ft. Chris Brown
"When You Love Someone" - Tone Stith ft. H.E.R.
"Formwela 5" - Esperanza Spalding ft. Corey King
Featured image by
- New Music Friday: Here's Your Weekend Playlist - xoNecole ... ›
- New Music Friday: Here's Your Weekend Playlist - xoNecole ... ›
- New Music Relases - July 2021 - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
Taysha Robinson is a writer and high school English teacher, based in metro-Atlanta. A self described philomath, you can find her reading books and articles of every genre, attending educational conferences, and hiking wherever the terrain will allow.
Reset Your Relationship: How To Start 2025 Strong With Your Partner
As the calendar turns and a new year unfolds, many of us are laser-focused on our career goals, fitness resolutions, and vision boards that outline the journey to our best selves. But amidst all the planning and self-improvement, have you made room for another important part of your life? Your relationship.
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Step 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Step 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
Step 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
How Different Fruit Juices And Smoothies Can Actually Benefit Your Vagina
Lately, I’ve been thinking about dropping 10 pounds. And you know what — I know immediately what I can do to make it happen, damn near immediately: cut out fruit juice. Listen, even though there are benefits to fruit juice consumption (otherwise, there would be no need to write this article), I’d be totally irresponsible if I didn’t also put on record that the sugar in fruit juice can definitely help you to pack on the calories if you’re not careful.
Just think about it — if you purchase a carton of juice that says each serving is 120 calories per eight-ounce glass, and you have three or four of those bad boys over the course of one day, you’ve just downed 360-480 calories alone. So yeah, if anything needs to be consumed in moderation, fruit juice would be it (although, for the record, some of the juices that contain the least amount of sugar include cranberry, papaya, orange, pomegranate, and tart cherry juice, and, by far, 100 percent fruit concentrate is best because it’s commercial brand juice in its purest form).
However, let’s also keep in mind that 1) not all juices are created equal (for instance, using a juicer to make your own is going to be better for you, for sure; 2) fruit juice can help to hydrate, detoxify and energize you, and 3) there are nutrients in fruit juice that can do your body some real good…so long as you don’t overdo it. And today, we’re going to tackle 10 that are good for your vagina, especially so.
Are you ready to learn about which juices (and smoothies) will bless your va-jay-jay in a mighty way?
Unsplash
1. Apple Juice
When it comes to juices that also don’t contain a ton of sugar, it might surprise you that apple makes the list when you stop to think about how sweet it actually is. And whether it’s the high amount of fiber that apples contain, the pectin that’s in it that will help to keep your gut healthy, the fact that apples are easily made up of at least 80 percent water, or the fact that this is a fruit that has properties in it that help to reduce inflammation, apple juice can benefit your vagina on a few different levels. The more healthy bacteria that are in your gut, the greater your chances are of avoiding a yeast infection, and the more hydrated your system is, the more natural lubrication your vagina will have.
2. Avocado Smoothie
Whenever you decide to puree fresh fruits and/or veggies in a blender, what you typically end up with is a smoothie. Smoothies can be good for you because they can be a quick and easy way to pack a lot of nutrients in one serving. That said, another way to boost your vaginal health is to treat yourself to an avocado smoothie (and yes, avocados are a fruit).
One of the best things about avocados is the fact that they are basically a superfood thanks to the impressive amount of nutrients that are in them, including protein, fiber, vitamins B, C, E, K, folate, copper, magnesium, and potassium. Avocados are also another fruit that is good at maintaining gut health, and they’re packed with antioxidants, too.
Vitamin B is helpful if you’re looking for an all-natural way to combat vaginal dryness (so is vitamin E). Copper can help to reduce the appearance of premature gray pubic hairs. Magnesium is awesome because it helps to reduce symptoms that are associated with PMS, menopause, and even PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome). Antioxidants are what help to keep (vaginal) infections at bay.
Unsplash
3. Cranberry Juice
A ton of water and fiber are in cranberries. Not only that, but they have some vitamin A, vitamin E, and copper in them as well. The reasons why (pure) cranberry juice is top-notch in the vaginal health department is because it contains chemical compounds known as polyphenols that help to fight off UTIs (urinary tract infections), they can keep your blood vessels healthy (which helps to improve and intensify orgasms), and the vitamin C that’s also in it can help your body to produce more collagen which can keep your vagina youthful for a longer period of time (check out “Keep Your Vagina Like A (Literal) Fountain Of Youth”).
4. Mango Juice
If, like me, you enjoy a good mango sans all of the stringiness — a great alternative is mango juice. Every time you enjoy a glass, you can feel good about the fact that you are getting quite a bit of fiber, vitamin C, copper, folate, vitamin A, and vitamin E into your system. Vitamin A is cool because it will help to boost your immunity (which means fewer vaginal infections), and the folate can help to reduce your chances of being diagnosed with HPV (human papillomavirus).
Something else to keep in mind about mangoes is they can help to keep your skin and hair healthy — which is also relevant when it comes to maintaining vaginal health (check out “Vaginas Age Just Like Everything Else. You Can Slow It Down, Though.”).
Getty Images
5. Pineapple Juice
If the first thing that comes to your mind when you think of pineapples and what they can do for your vagina is they make it taste better, I actually touch on that in the article, “10 Ways To Have An 'Extra Sweet' Vagina.” The reality is nothing can make your vagina taste like a fruit smoothie (because it wasn’t designed to); however, there are certain foods that can cause your secretions to be more…pleasant to the palate than others — and yes, pineapples are one of them.
Some other reasons why your vagina will appreciate you consuming pineapple juice is because an enzyme in it known as bromelain helps to promote tissue healing (including vaginal tissue that may be irritated). Plus, there are nutrients in pineapple that also reduce inflammation, and the off-the-charts amount of vitamin C that is in it will reduce your chances of experiencing recurring BV (bacterial vaginosis) while also helping to keep your pH levels and vaginal odor in check.
6. Lemonade
At the end of the day, lemonade is simply a mixture of lemons, water, and whatever sweetener you choose to use — and that’s why it also makes this list. You already know that the water in lemonade will help to keep your vagina nice and hydrated, so let’s focus on the lemons for a moment.
Without question, lemons are packed with vitamin C, which helps to synthesize sexual hormones like testosterone, estrogen, and progesterone. Something else that’s dope about lemons is they can help your body absorb iron better.
Vaginally, this is relevant because there is a direct link between iron deficiency and bacterial vaginosis.
Getty Images
7. Banana Smoothie
Let’s tackle another smoothie. Fiber, potassium, vitamin C, and antioxidants are all found in bananas, and all of these nutrients work together in order to improve your blood sugar levels, keep your digestive system in good shape, and give you energy. Potassium is great for your vagina because it helps to keep your vaginal muscles (i.e., your pelvic floor) from weakening, and the energy boost can definitely help your libido if your mind is in the mood more than your body may be after being completely worn out from the demands of the day.
8. Peach Juice
As far as taste goes, peaches are one of my all-time favorite fruits, so it’s really just a bonus that they are really good for my (and your) health and well-being. Aside from being a pretty good source of vitamins A and C, peaches also help to reduce allergy-related symptoms (which, yes, can sometimes lead to vaginal inflammation), can help to boost your immune system (so that you experience less vaginal infections), and they can keep your blood sugar at reasonable levels so that you end up with fewer yeast infections.
Unsplash
9. Grapefruit Juice
Now, before I get into this one, I do think that I should give you a heads-up that if you are taking a form of birth control that has estrogen in it, ask your doctor if you should drink grapefruit juice. The reason why I say that is science has proven that sometimes grapefruit juice can impact the levels of estrogen in the body (the more you know). Beyond that, though, grapefruit juice can be good for your vagina because it boosts immunity, is great for your skin’s health and well-being, can help to reduce inflammation, and will also deeply hydrate your system.
10. Berry Smoothie
Berry smoothies are delicious, and so it’s simply the icing on the cake that your vagina will benefit from them. Aside from the vitamin C and fiber that is also in them, it’s important to take note of the plant compounds that raspberries, blueberries, and raspberries have because many of them mimic estrogen, which can be helpful if you’re someone who is in the latter stage of perimenopause and you’re looking for an all-natural form of relief. Another dope thing about berries is the antioxidants in them can help to decrease oxidative stress, which ultimately reduces your chances of having a vaginal infection.
____
I don’t know about you, but I’m always interested in finding out things that will help to keep my vagina in optimal condition. So, if juice is one of your favorite life pleasures, again, so long as you don’t drink an entire carton (or bottle) in one sitting, know that your vagina will enjoy a glass of these 10 options just as much as you will. And isn’t that a delicious thing to know? Absolutely.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Tempura/Getty Images