Blavity CEO and co-founder Morgan DeBaun is your girl boss' favorite girl boss.
And I'm not just saying that because she impressively pivoted from her corporate tech job in Silicon Valley to running a successful media company at just 28 years old. I'm also not just saying that because she was able to secure $6.5 million dollars in new funding this past summer from GV (formerly known as Google Ventures).
Morgan DeBaun is worthy of that title because she's managed to do all of that while keeping one main thing in mind: This is all bigger than her.
Morgan DeBaun/Blavity
She took the time to chat with xoNecole in the midst of a busy workday and explained that the goal from the very beginning was to create a news source for the current and future generations. More specifically, a news source that accurately shared stories and spoke to issues that those in the Black community cared about, to highlight different categories of Black life both locally and abroad. "It's about pushing politicians, policy-makers, and thought leaders to consider the real-life impact of things happening in our world and how it affects the Black young community," she says.
The St. Louis native realized in 2014, along with her co-founders, that part of the beauty of being Black in America was the diversity of experiences and cultural things that go into our identity. And in an effort to not take on a linear perspective of blackness, they all joined heads to create and host spaces where different discussions and stories could be told. As a result of that, Blavity now covers multiple subsets including travel and food via Travel Noire, television and film via Shadow and Act, beauty and wellness via 21Ninety, and technology and entrepreneurship via AfroTech.
And yet, with all that going on Morgan has managed to stay grounded and focused on the present without succumbing to the pressures of her future goals and plans. It's something she credits partially to the amazing tribe of women she surrounds herself with on a continual basis. She tells me that being around women who are in the same vein of work helps her to not get ahead of or overwhelm herself. It's the women who are pursuing a life of creativity, entrepreneurship, and hustling that help keep her going. The women who are all pressing towards the mark of attaining both personal and professional success. And perhaps it's because of that power of connection and finding her tribe that she's been able to not only level up in her professional development but in her personal development as well.
Facing times in her career where she was sometimes the only woman in the room and the only Black person in the room, Morgan quickly realized that if entrepreneurship was the path she was headed down, she had to be present, perceptive, and persistent. She had to figure out a way to ignore the statistics and figures. To focus on the things that were in her control and not be negatively impacted by the things that were outside of it. "I try to ask myself: how can I be better today? Do I know my information? Am I performing at a level that's in alignment with my peers? And if the answer is 'yes,' and all those things are true, then that's the best I can do. I focus on just being my best self and let the results be the results."
Afrotech
"I focus on just being my best self and let the results be the results."
She's learned that it's okay to ask for help and to not be scared of the things she doesn't know. And she's also learned not to internalize the rejection, which is especially true when it comes to the area of entrepreneurship. For her, the journey is about surviving through difficult losses as much as it is thriving through exciting wins. It's about re-evaluating where you possibly went wrong and picking up where you left off. She explains, "Entrepreneurship is something that looks at not how many times you fall, but how quickly you can get back up and not fall in that same way again. It's difficult for sure, but if it wasn't, everybody would be doing it, right?"
"Entrepreneurship is something that looks at not how many times you fall, but how quickly you can get back up and not fall in that same way again."
Morgan DeBaun/Blavity
As we wrap, there is still one thing left unspoken: The future and what's coming up next. For Blavity, the future looks like investing more resources into the stories that are being published on their site and building up the news part of it. And after telling me how she dedicated her entire 20s to building and creating something for others, the next major phase in life for Morgan will be focused on maintaining what she's built for others while also creating something for herself. Though it seems she's already gotten a head start of that with the creation of M. Roze Essentials, her skincare and lifestyle brand dedicated to the modern Black woman.
In two years, she'll be 30 and undoubtedly well on her way to knocking off more phenomenal things on her goal list. And while her ambitions may arguably be lofty, we're both confident that if anybody can achieve them, she can. "At the end of the day, I always know that the one person I can always count on is myself. And I will always show up for myself."
How's that for a girl boss?
To keep up with Morgan, follow her on Instagram.
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So, today? Today, we’re going to tackle how sex impacts us when it comes to our energy fields. What (mostly) inspired this is once reading a science-based article about how it is a fact and not a myth that just like plants can absorb energy from other plants, humans can do the same thing by being in the space of other human beings. And when you stop to really think about it, doesn’t that make all of the sense in the world?
Otherwise, there wouldn’t be terms out here like “peer pressure” and big grown folks wouldn’t be out here trying to look and act just like some of their favorite celebrities or IG influencers (and yet, on that point, I digress).
So, since energy impacts us in some pretty significant ways, let’s take a few moments to see how it goes down when it comes to copulation — just so that you’re (even more) aware of what you’re getting yourself into when you “do the do,” as far as your personal energy space is concerned.
Energy. Revisited.
GiphyOkay, so before we get all up in how energy is exchanged during sexual activity, what is energy as it relates to human beings, in general? Well, in some ways, it all depends on who you ask. For instance, the famed Greek philosopher Aristotle once said that energy is about having the capacity to do something. Some medical experts say that energy is all about how something impacts you on a mental or physical level.
For instance, negative energy tends to be very heavy and draining while positive energy can increase feel-good chemicals throughout your system which makes it easier for you to do things like be creative and problem-solve. Something else that I think is important to keep in mind as far as human energy goes is it’s impacted by a myriad of things including a person’s stress levels, how healthy a person is, what their life choices are (as far as how their decisions influence them) and even what their sleep patterns are like.
And if all of this is true, then something else that Aristotle once said about energy would be beyond accurate: “The energy of the mind is the essence of life.”
Energy is life. Whew, so if this is indeed the case, does this mean that when you choose to have sex with someone, you are sharing your life force — whatever state that may be — with someone as they are doing the same to/for/with you? YES.
What Does It Mean to Exchange Sexual Energy?
GiphySince I grew up in an entertainment industry household, I think that’s probably why I’ve ended up with some close friends who are in the industry as well. That said, I will never forget when I was talking to one of them one day about a particular artist. When I expressed how much sex appeal that she had, my (male) friend simply said, “Yeah, I’ve been in her presence a few times before. She has some really dark energy. I didn’t even hug her.”
Now from a scientific standpoint, dark energy is simply what causes the universe to accelerate in growth over a certain period of time; however, when a person is described to have dark energy, that usually means that they have an evil and/or negative and/or heavy and/or draining aura about them. And y’all, here’s what’s semi-wild about what he said: did you know that science backs that hugs do indeed transfer energy?
Yep, research reveals that a hug from someone can literally alter your brain and body chemistry — so you definitely need to be discerning about who you let up into your affection space. Straight up. And so, since a hug has the capacity to do that, how much more can SEX?
To further emphasize this, let’s begin with an article that I read on Healthline’s website entitled, “Do We Really Exchange Energy During Sex?” After checking it out, one of the main things that I appreciated was when a doctor who was interviewed for the piece said:
“Every sex act is an exchange of energy [because] every sexual act raises or lowers your energy level…Therefore, a sexual relationship isn’t a purely psychological or physiological, mechanical act…Rather, it’s an energetic action. When we have an intimate relationship with someone, the two energies merge.”
Okay, so according to science, when two people have sex, energies merge. Well, according to Scripture, when two people have sex, oneness transpires (Genesis 2:24-25). Let’s keep going.
There was once a Physician-scientist by the name of Wilhelm Reich (who actually died in prison, in part, because of his radical beliefs on sex and orgasms during his time), who once said that having a healthy sex life (which, to him, including orgasms and is what he referred to as “orgastic potency”) is what played a huge role in one’s emotional health and well-being. That’s because, to him, without the release of sexual energy, neurological disorders would be come to be.
My takeaway from this is when you think about the fact that things like serotonin, dopamine, and the “the bonding chemical” oxytocin are all released during sex (and most certainly during orgasms), and also since sex (and orgasms) reduce stress — you need to tend to your sexual energy for the sake of your holistic health. Let’s continue on.
After reading an article on sexual energy on Cosmo’s website in which one of the sex therapists said that “our sexuality is our power" and then reading an article on the same topic on Well + Good’s platform where another expert stated that, “Many belief systems believe sexual energy is an expression of the soul's connection to the cosmos and the rest of the universe”, I thought about the word “power” and then “soul connection.”
At the end of the day, power isn’t just ability but the capability to influence and even take authority over something or someone. And a soul connection? Several years ago, when I penned a piece for the platform entitled, “I’ve Got Some Ways For You To Start Pampering Your Soul,” one of the things that I made sure to emphasize is your soul IS also your life. This means that soul connections are life connections.
And so, it would appear that sharing sexual energy also means that you are making a life connection with someone. And that type of connection has the power to influence you in ways that you couldn’t even begin to imagine. That is how deep exchanging sexual energy is.
What You Should Always Keep in Mind Before Sharing Sexual Energy with Someone Else
GiphyNow are there degrees to this whole sexual energy thing? Of course. The type of connection that a husband and wife of 20 years can make via sex is very different than a one-night stand. However, it would appear that science believes that it doesn’t really matter what you tell yourself about sex with someone (or even how many condoms you may use during sex) — potent energy is exchanged regardless.
That’s a huge part of the reason why I will forever roll my eyes about how ridiculous “casual sex” sounds to me, because, although I do believe that it is very possible to engage in coitus that has no real purpose (casual is purposeless, by definition), what isn’t possible is for there not to be a significant connection made from a scientific standpoint. Because again, if a mere hug can alter you (shoot, a handshake too), do you really think that allowing a man’s penis into the sacred space known as your vagina will not? After reading all of this…do you really?
When it comes to energy, author T. Harv Eker once said, “Energy is contagious: either you affect people or you infect people.” With all that was just shared about sexual energy, each and every person you choose to “engage” with, they are either going to affect you or infect you — just with their energy alone.
Knowing this, if there was ever a time to choose wisely, this would be it.
Your energy is your power. Who you exchange power with? CHOOSE WISELY.
EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON.
And because energy can shift…be cognizant of what you’re doing…EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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Featured image by Giphy