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7 Ways To Establish A Mental Connection Long Before You Enter The Bedroom
I am not a casual sex type of person. I love dick but I love an emotional connection more. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’ve tried it once or twice but ultimately sex is better when I have a connection–the penis just feels better. However, pop culture would have you believe that when you meet someone, it’s automatic lust at first sight. You’re supposed to not be able to keep your hands off of each other due to all the sexual tension. Well in reality, especially in my life, that’s not how it works. I need a little more than physical attraction to get my juices flowing.
As a sex expert, I’ve found that most women, more often than not need a connection before penetration. It’s just how we are hardwired. The sexual response cycle for men and women is totally different. Generally, before a woman can get aroused, she has to experience desire. For most men, all it takes is a little visual stimulation, and boom. In fact, most men don’t need to feel an emotional connection at all in order to have sex; all they need is a warm hole. Do with that information what you will. But, women on the other hand tend to feel sexual desire once the emotional connection is formed.
Building an emotional connection can lead to better sexual experiences. Emotional intimacy helps stimulate oxytocin, the love hormone, which creates trust and vulnerability. A study published in American Sociological Review found that heterosexual college women have orgasms more often in relationships than in hookups. Most women value safety, in all aspects of their lives. When I feel safe and comfortable with someone, I’m more likely to take risks and explore new things. I'm also more willing to share my inner thoughts, desires, and fantasies within a safe space.
Knowing one another on an emotional level can help build mutual respect. Having mutual respect means you value your partner and consider their thoughts and feelings. Being shown respect l builds appreciation and appreciation builds connection. It’s important to keep in mind that building emotional intimacy takes time and work.
Being vulnerable can be scary and uncomfortable. But here are some helpful tips you can use to help deepen the bond with your partner while making it less awkward.
1.Open and Honest Communication To Build Trust
Communication is the key to all levels of intimacy. Most women like to communicate, especially about feelings. Sharing about each other’s day and about what’s happening in each other’s life helps women feel more emotionally connected. Try having a conversation before sex. If you want to relate to each other on a deeper level, you'll need to open up and let your partner experience your hopes, fears, dreams, and vulnerabilities.
Also, pillow talk sessions are a great way to build emotional connections after sex. Researchers found that people who spend more time on post-sex affection—like cuddling, kissing, caressing, spooning, or expressing their love for each other—are more satisfied in their relationships and feel more sexually satisfied.
2.Learn Each Other's Love Language
Gary Chapman the author of the popular book, The 5 Love Languages came up with five general ways that romantic partners express and experience love. The five ways we experience love are through Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch. Oftentimes we assume that our partner wants to receive love in the same way that we do, and this can lead to frustration and disappointment.
If your partner’s love language is quality time but you are too busy working and keep buying them expensive gifts instead, they aren’t going to feel connected to you. Learning how our partner receives love builds connection.
3.Kisses, Kisses and More Kisses
A 2013 study in the Archives of Sexual Behavior reported that frequent kissing is correlated with a couple’s perception of the quality of their relationship and specifically, the more kissing there is, the higher levels of happiness that are reported. Kissing usually is the first thing to take place before engaging in other sexual activity. It helps you decide your sexual compatibility and desire for this person before sex and gives you more time to build up that sexual anticipation.
However, kissing can start fading the longer a relationship goes. One study found that 1 in 5 couples don’t even kiss at all. So, try to incorporate kissing throughout the day and during sex as a way to build a connection.
4.Explore Sensuality Without the Goal of Orgasm
Take time to explore each other’s bodies and fantasies without orgasm being the only goal. By taking your time, you will learn to appreciate each other more on both an emotional and physical level. Good communication will come in handy when discussing what ways you like to engage in foreplay and what ways don’t get you as turned on. Think about and enjoy what you are experiencing and how you might give pleasure to your partner in return.
5.Be Friends First
Friendship is at the core of any strong relationship. Research has shown that friendship in a relationship is an important indicator of both romantic and physical satisfaction. Couples who are friends report higher levels of happiness in their relationships than couples who aren’t. Get back to being friends by having fun and being playful. Having fun can be as simple as laughing at each other's jokes or leaving each other silly notes.
6.Share Experiences
Doing things…together…is important. Even if it’s just binging on Netflix next to each other on the couch, have shared experiences in your week. Whatever it is that you and your partner like to do, do it together as a simple way to build a stronger connection in a relationship. If you live completely separate lives you’re not going to be very connected with each other. Shared experiences bring partners closer.
7.Show Empathy and Sympathy
One of the most important things partners can do for each other provides empathy and understanding. Empathy means relating to your partner's feelings and making them feel understood, which helps validate your partner's feelings and gives comfort. When things are tough, expressing empathy or sympathy helps your partner understand how valuable the bond is that they share with you. They learn to appreciate your feelings and often reciprocate too.
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This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
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Tubi has been gaining popularity due to its free sign-up and a vast selection of series and films. According to Deadline, the FAST (free ad-streaming television) service has seen a 14.7% growth from May and now has similar numbers to Disney+. So while many people have joked about Tubi having low-budget movies, the numbers don't lie.
In fact, I was one of those people who didn't get the appeal of Tubi, but the more I watched it, the more I enjoyed the content. They have some of our favorite TV series, such as Scandal and Star, as well as big films like the Fast and Furious franchise and cult classic Love & Basketball.
Tubi even has its own original movies and series that are just as entertaining. But while Tubi is on the come up, some of the low-budget movies and hood movies are still a must-watch. From Tubi originals to the hood movies, we've put together a list of shows and movies to add to your watchlist.
Cinnamon
Cinnamon is an original Tubi movie that stars Hailey Kilgore (Juke from Power Book III: Raising Kanan), Damon Wayans, and Pam Grier. It's a love story gone awry after a robbery turns deadly, and a young couple faces many challenges to make it out alive.
The Dirty D
The Dirty D is one of the first things I watched on Tubi, as many people highly recommended it. It's a series set in a Detroit club, and it has all the drama you can think of. Murder, drug dealing, cheating, greed, and more.
Black Men Don't Cheat
In this film, a young woman grapples with the death of her husband while also discovering his secret life, which puts her in danger.
Mother May I
This movie fully captivates the overbearing mother. However, the ending will shock you as she goes a little too far.
The Stepdaughter
When a young girl moves in with her dad and his new wife, a series of unfortunate events occurs. This Tubi original will keep your attention with every turn.
These Men For Everybody
These Men For Everybody is a film that highlights the tangled web of friendships and relationships and how you can't trust anybody.
Best Friend
What happens when your best friend is obsessed with you? This movie, which stars Serayah and Marques Houston, answers this very question and takes us on a ride in the process.
What's Done After Dark
What's Done After Dark shows us that everything isn't always what it seems. The twist at the end is a real doozy.
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