I'll admit, that planning any trip can feel like a daunting task. There are so many variables to consider, so much preparation, but the end result is so worth it (read: there are still bound to be f*ck ups). Europe was no different.
I wanted to go to London since I was a little girl watching the Olsen twins in the direct-to-video film Winning London. It had a lasting effect, similarly to the way Passport to Paris did. I was going to delay my travels until 2019, but ultimately decided why should I wait any longer. I can work anywhere, the nature of my life warrants flexibility, so I am finally free to move like the water I have always felt a special connection to. And so, I decided to start planning my long lusted trip to London, England with plans to also stop in Paris.
Initially, I chose April, but after a death in the family inspired me to press pause for just a bit, reconnect to what I really want (hello, apartment), and second-guess traveling this year once again all together, I was going to cancel. Luckily, my heart sang a different tune and I decided to sing to that instead - opted for October, paid the $308 fee to change my flight, and was London-bound for the fall.
And for those of you who might be feeling overwhelmed by the planning of it all, I've done some of the necessary work for you by gathering some of the tips that helped me plan my first European travel excursion. Check 'em out below:
Do All The Necessary Prep Work Ahead Of Time
Arriving at St. Pancras International in London
Photo Cred: Terrence Porter
Note that while there's no such thing as an "off-peak" season in Paris, you can find cheaper airline deals between September-December range (anytime after or before summer is best to avoid the heavy tourist crowd). Ensure that your passport is up to date, also read up the parameters of travel limitations for the place you plan to visit. You can read up on that via the Bureau of Consular Affairs for the given country's international travel information. Before you travel abroad, also be sure to make copies of your important travel and identity docs, i.e. your passport, license, and perhaps your social security card. In addition to your plane tickets, book any additional transportation plans, like a rental car, public transportation passes, or a train if necessary.
In our case, purchasing our train tickets for Eurostar ahead of time were a must too. It's advised to start booking your train from London to Paris at least three months in advance (find them here). We did our best to leave a couple of hours between our flights' arrival and our train's departure so that once we touched down in London, we'd take the train to Paris to pack our travel day as much as possible and do a one-shot to our next destination.
In reality, what actually happened was we missed our train by about five minutes and had to pay 44 euros for a new ticket for the next train to Paris. Some research on my part would have been helpful in figuring out how to map out the train departure in relation to our flight arrival, especially because London St. Pancras International ended up being kind of far from the airport (about 35-45 minutes to be exact). And if you do nothing else, get an International plan with your cell phone service because the data will be needed for Ubers and such. Trust. And because my friend and I had Airbnbs in both locations, WhatsApp and some data comes clutch for the check-in process. So again I say, TRUST.
Lodging Recommendations
In Paris:
Hotel Emile - it's located in Marais, relatively close to a metro station, and offers free breakfast with direct booking.
Airbnb - we stayed in this studio apartment. It was very quaint and located in a trendier complex in the North part of Paris. Close to laundry, cafes, food, grocery stores, and only a few miles away from big attractions.
In London:
The Pilgrm - it's located in Paddington, relatively close to the tube station, and is very stylish. If I didn't stay in an Airbnb, this was going to be the one.
Airbnb - Huma's Victorian townhome feels so authentically London, it was so dope to stay there for a few days. Definitely recommend.
See All The Must-See Attractions
Capturing moments at the Louvre
Photo Cred: Terrence Porter
It is impossible to see everything a city has to offer, especially in the span of three days. Think about it, there are people who call these cities home and still haven't seen everything it has to offer. On your first day, make a running list of attractions that you feel are the Must-See places and hit them up when the day breaks. See as much as possible, and do as much as possible, especially during your first day in a new place. This will give allow you to see all of the touristy spots, while also allowing the freedom of sticking a pin in some of your favorite sights to potentially go to again before your trip is over.
In London, everything was very centralized and the tube was really easy to navigate, so hitting up Big Ben, London Bridge, the London Eye, Buckingham Palace, Hyde Park, and Kensington Palace was done pretty effortlessly. On our first day in Paris, we walked to Montmartre, the Arc du Triomphe, and the Eiffel Tower. Because we chose walking over public transportation, we saved the Louvre for the next evening and allowed ourselves to indulge a little with the next tip.
Tour The City Like A Local
Taking in the Seine River in Paris
Photo Cred: Terrence Porter
This is the day to get lost, to take your time, and really take in the beauty and the history, the sights and sounds of the city in a less strategical way. While in Europe, I noticed that people had places to go but I also noted how lax a lot of the locals were with spending time in a state of experiencing. In Paris, they'd bring espresso and crepes to talk and gaze at the Seine or drink beer alongside the Thames. I even saw a guy outside of the Gare du Nord train station with an espresso cup that he rested on a newspaper stand as he stood and people watched in the middle of the sidewalk. Or in London, where people took midday breaks at the pub with a draft beer and wrote in their moleskins as the city moved around them.
My point is, everyone seemed to take their time a bit more. So, as we got lost, it was important to me to take breaks and take in the city, take in the life, take in the quiet and just be still. It was a lesson in being present that I really enjoyed.
Sit Back & Relax Your Mind
A glimpse of our beautiful Airbnb
Photo Cred: Terrence Porter
Don't let the go-go-go mentality of travel stop you from relaxing in the moment and showing gratitude for the fact that you are there. Make sure you don't allow guilt to dictate the moves you make or don't make. If you want to relax and recoup from your 16-hour travel day, take your time. Rest up. Enjoy yourself. You've earned it. My travel buddy was an up and at 'em kind of traveler that wanted to be up by 7 am to explore until 11 or noon, and then we'd convene and spend the day and evening together until I was ready to wrap up the night (especially because this ninja had the motto of walking everywhere in Paris).
I took my time though. I slept in. I did my morning routine. I read a book and highlighted passages. I updated my emails and checked on my site. And when I rose to reemerge into the city for hours on end, I lived.
Europe was absolutely magical. 10/10, I definitely recommend. Click through the gallery below to see some of the things I saw and experienced while over there.
Paris Photo Diary
Photo Cred: Terrence Porter
London Photo Diary
*Originally published on Postcards & 808s
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While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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Feature image by Leon Bennett/WireImage
“I mean, even the Bible mentions a green bed in the Song of Solomon.”
And indeed, it does. Song of Solomon 1:16 (NKJV), the Black woman (Song of Solomon 1:5) known as the Shulamite said, “Behold, you are handsome, my beloved! Yes, pleasant! Also, our bed is green.” I absolutely adore that because I know what green symbolizes. It represents things like health, fertility, rebirth, growth, and peace, and for a woman to say that the bed that she shares with her lover is filled with all of those things…I mean, how awesome is that?
It's also a great way to intro the topic for today — color psychology. Not just that, but how you actually can use it to make your sex life better. If your curiosity is piqued, read on to find out how you can use certain hues to cultivate a sexier atmosphere in your own life.
Color Psychology. Revisited.
GiphyOkay, so sincepsychology is the study of the mind and how humans behave because of it,color psychology is about how our minds respond and react to various hues. Although some people are somewhat unconvinced that color psychology is a “real thing,” there is enough research and data that’s available to support its validity.
For instance, one of the reasons why high-end hotels go with white sheets for their bedding is because white represents things like purity, cleanliness, and even luxury. One reason why many of us wear black to funerals is because black symbolizes things like formality and death. If whenever you go to a spa, you notice a lot of blue, that could be because that color is all about peace, tranquility, and trust.
Although the science behind color psychology is semi-complex, the main reason why color has the ability to affect us in the way that it does is because of the way that our eyes and brain interact with certain lights and wavelengths. In other words, each color causes our brains to either absorb light or reflect it, and based on what our brain does in response to all of this, that has a direct impact on our moods.
For example, when we process something as being the color yellow, it can provide us with a surge of energy, while if we process something as being red, it can literally increase our heart rate and adrenaline levels. And this is why you may notice classrooms that are painted yellow or why you may have noticed that red is considered to be a sexually stimulating hue.
Speaking of red, this would be a good of a time as any to segue into why it and certain other colors have the ability to influence and even improve your sex life.
Colors That Work As an “Aphrodisiac”
GiphyWhen it comes to certain colors having an aphrodisiac effect, since I just mentioned red, let’s start with it.
If you were to poll a group of people about a color that they would consider to be the absolute sexiest, there’s a pretty good chance that red would top the list. That’s because it is associated with things like love, passion, energy, excitement, and desire.
In fact, one study revealed that men find red to be the sexiest color to the point where almost 60 percent of them were more inclined to ask a woman out if she happened to have that color on. Not only that, but if women were standing in front of a red backdrop, most of the men in the study automatically found them to be more attractive.
Something else that’s interesting about the color red is “…it's not just men, but women, too, who see women who dress in red as more overtly sexual and open to having sex.” So clearly, if you want to be seen in a sensual way, wearing red (even if it’s just red lipstick) is something that you should consider doing.
Is red the only sexually stimulating hue out here, though? Nope. Aside from green, which I mentioned in the intro:
- Orange represents creativity and enthusiasm
- Purple represents luxury and spirituality
- Black represents mystery and elegance
- Pink represents femininity and playfulness
- Brown represents warmth and comfort
While keeping all of this in mind, now that you know that even science backs that color can mentally and emotionally affect you, when it comes to your sex life, it’s important to select shades that will influence the vibe that you want to give in order to receive the results that you want. For instance, do you want a passionate night? You might want to go with red.
On the other hand, if you’d like to experience a little of what I call “comfort sex” (check out “What Is 'Comfy Sex'? How Can You Get More Of It?”), you might want to bring some brown into the picture. Interesting how each shade can bring about something different, right?
How to Use Color to Improve the Quality of Your Sex Life
GiphyOkay, sonow that you know that there is some straight-up legitimacy that comes with incorporating color into, not just your life, but your bedroom (activities) as well, let’s briefly explore a few practical ways that you can do just that.
Sleepwear. Sometimes, the topic of lingerie comes up with my clients (check out “Lingerie Hacks: How To Choose The Best Kind For Your Body Type”). When it does, I will recommend that the wife wear something that is in her husband’s favorite color — because if she’s already in something that’s hella sexy, if it’s also in a color that he really likes, that can cause his eyes to light up all the more!
However, when it comes to color psychology, specifically, if you want to get your partner to try something new, maybe an orange teddy will subconsciously convey the message. Bottom line here, try wearing something in the color that represents the kind of night you want to have — and see if it helps to push things into that direction.
Bedding.A firm mattress. Some breathable bedding (like cotton or sateen). Scented sheets. All of this can play a seductive role in having a great night with your bae — and so can selecting sheets that are of a particular color. For this one, you might want to go with a darker hue like purple or even charcoal because they both can make you feel extravagant — and since one definition of that word is “going beyond bounds” — well…I’ll leave that to your imagination. #wink
Lighting. This one just might surprise you. Although you might automatically think that going with something like a red light bulb is the best route to take on the “set the mood” lighting tip, you actually should opt for brown instead. I actuallyread an article that said in a lot of sex scenes from popular movies (like Fifty Shades of Grey), brown was used because it’s a very inviting color. Hmph, when you think about the warm'n'cozy thing, that definitely tracks.
Footwear. When you get a chance, check out TIME’s “Science Proves It: Men Really Do Find High Heels Sexier.” When I shared it with a few “feet men” that I know and asked them if this also applies to sex, each of them said that they are super turned on by women who wear stilettos in the bedroom. I was told that they like it because it makes their legs look longer, it’s unbelievably feminine, and if it’s even erotic. The best color to go with? Black is a classic choice — and since it also symbolizes things like power and authority, if you want to be a bit dominant tonight, a black pump will certainly help to get the message across.
Lipstick. And yes, the lips. A little over a year ago, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “The Secret To The Ultimate Oral Sex Experience? Lip Gloss.” When you get a chance, check it out and then think about applying a coat of it to some red or pink lips. It will make your lips look unbelievably sensual and will be sure to ramp up his desire for you…even more.
____
When it comes to having a truly fulfilling sex life, it doesn’t always take a lot of effort. Sometimes, just the change of color can make it happen. At least, that’s what science says.
Try a new color — then report back about which one worked best for you.
I can’t wait to hear it. #wink
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Featured image by Giphy