There's a rush of intrigue, fear, and guilt that happens in a moment of curiosity that prompts a search of online stories about how to start an OnlyFans. (I can't be the only one, sis.) I mean, whenever you think about the popular platform, the first words that come to mind are all related to adult films or sex.
But that's not all that savvy entrepreneurs and side hustlers are using the site for. By pure usability, the site was made for creators to offer their content for a subscription fee, putting money in their pockets and allowing them the freedom to expand their audiences or customers. According to OnlyFan's website, you could earn up to $7,495 per month—depending on the number of subscribers—offering all sorts of content.
Image via Giphy
Sexual material in any form has obviously been the most dominant and talked about on the site, but that's a fact across the internet, period.
Another great caveat: There's a second option where you can offer free content and get paid per view. So it's a win-win either way for those who know how to leverage the platform's offerings.
OnlyFans charges a fee of 20% of creators' earnings from subscriptions and views, which is more attractive than having revenues on other popular video-based platforms deeply impacted by ads and other ever-changing (and often limiting) algorithms.
And you might be wondering: Why not just offer video content via your own website or a third-party webinar platform? Well, it's the same reason you wouldn't just bake 50 cakes from scratch when there's a very capable baker down the road who can manage the whole process and bake the cakes more effectively and efficiently.
Anywho, check out a few ideas for starting an OnlyFans when you're not into showing tits, booty, or any other part of your body for that matter. These are perfect for the savvy freelancer or entrepreneur with great content to offer:
1. Fitness Tutorials
True, you could post fitness sessions, tips, or advice on other platforms, but again, there's an exclusivity factor and money-making opportunity that might be being missed. A great way to complement the content you offer on other sites practically for free (or pennies for the average person just starting out) is to give a tease via the others and then promote more exclusive content via an OnlyFans page.
2. Consulting Sessions
If you have tried-and-true skills in leadership, business advancement, personal finance, or entrepreneurship, this is a huge space for you. Again, it's all about exclusivity and quality of experience. You can teach people virtually about how to start a business (or anything to do with successful business practices) and earn extra bucks for your knowledge and skin in the game.
Image via Giphy
3. Food and Cooking Videos
A really cool avenue for this would be specialized cooking based on location (ie Southern, African, Italian or Asian), dietary restrictions (i.e. vegetarian, vegan, plant-based, or raw) or purpose (i.e. weight loss, weight gain, maternal health, geriatrics, etc). It's cool to produce videos for other popular platforms, but again, check your receipts and look at the return on investment. If you're great at what you do, have a unique perspective to presenting your recipes or food, or want to talk industry or workplace issues specific to food, this is a great lane to explore.
4. Fashion or Apparel Demonstrations
Ever heard of QVC or Amazon Live? Well, you literally could create your own home shopping events (or at least one that showcases the best ways to wear your items or use your creations) via an OnlyFans.
If you're like me, you've walked past something in a store thinking, "Nah, I don't need that," only to return to said store and buy said item after seeing it in a video haul, styled by a favorite fashion vlogger. And that's the sales power of demonstration in action.
Also, who doesn't like to get updates on deals, secret sales, discounts or ways to save money that others are not privy to? Many of us shopping fanatics subscribe to magazines, email newsletters, and sample sale lists for just that.
5. Live Music Performances
If you're a musician or even someone who works in the business and has access to cool events, artists, and industry updates, offer it up via video snippets, a news show, or curated experiences that can only be seen via your OnlyFans. Many people yearn for that concert or festival vibe that was relished pre-COVID, and we can all see by the super-success of platforms like Verzuz that there's definitely an audience. It's one thing to DJ or give away content for free on other sites. It's another to create real community and connection via a subscription-based portal.
Image via Giphy
6. Wellness Sessions
There are so many apps on the market that offer limited free content just to get you hooked (hey, Calm), then draw you into paying for more access. Sis, if you're into affirmations, sleep therapy, meditation, spiritual guidance, or specialized yoga, get in where you fit in. Managing separate appointments, setting up one-off virtual webinars, and juggling multiple platforms while focusing on healing folks may not be the business. Plus, you'll be able to really zero in on a customer base that you can further connect with via other mediums.
7. Behind-the-Scenes Videos
Many people connect with brands and public figures simply by getting to know them personally (or at least feeling like they do). If you can share how you created something or videos about your day-to-day life as a mother, influencer, businesswoman, college student, newlywed (or any other major life journey), you can offer a breath of fresh air in the sometimes very dark and gloomy world of online media. Watching content on other video platforms gets a bit formulaic and dry after a while, so being able to connect with a favorite figure, brand or business in other ways can be a joy for supporters.
8. Exclusive Events Coverage
Even in this virtual post-pandemic (still pandemic?) environment, there are events to attend and people to link with. If you're an events coordinator or you're just known for always being where the action is, let people become social voyeurs for a fee. It's especially cool if you have an unique perspective, style, friend group, or personality to add a little flair to the content and context of what's being watched whether through commentary, hosting, creating pranks, or just being you.
Image via Giphy
9. Exclusive Livestreams
So, we're not talking sexual or raunchy here. We're talking about being free to talk how you want to talk, look the way you want to look, and be your full self (with the obvious and very necessary limits based on the rules of the site and state and federal laws).
One thing about OnlyFans is that if it allows sexual content, it definitely allows a certain kind of freedom that other platforms either restrict heavily or don't allow at all. The censorship is real, sis.
For example, you could be restricted on some platforms for posting a very innocent photo of your feet, fully covered by bubbles, in a bathtub with a "self-care" hashtag (happened to me) or for affectionately using certain provocative words or hashtags. (This has allegedly happened to quite a few influencers and everyday folk, and many bans are determined by algorithms or filters that clearly have issues related to appropriate filtering). If you want to talk about topics you're passionate about or want to offer content that covers topics in a way that's not watered-down and stifled, this might be the perfect platform for you.
10. Niche or Specialized Community-Building
Let's say you're into cosplay (and not that kind, sis), you're a Trekkie, you love Yorkies, you're a couponing fanatic, you're obsessed with Black art, or you're into geocaching. This platform might be a great space to not only build a community of like-minded folk, but provide a space for them to be supported and nurtured. You could be into fine jewelry collection, antiquing, thrifting, independent filmmaking, or adventure tourism. Curation and quality is key, and you can offer something that connects others to opportunities, experiences or information on specialized hobbies, activities, or businesses.
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In an xoNecole exclusive, the mom of two opened up about many things, including starting her wellness journey at 13 years old. However, a near-death experience during a procedure at 20 made her start taking her health more seriously.
“There's so many different levels, and now, I'm in a space of just integrating all of this good stuff that I've learned just about just being human, you know?” Dreka tells us. “So it's also fun because it's like a journey of self-discovery and self-mastery. That's what I call it. So it's never-ending.”
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If you follow Dreka, then you’re familiar with her holistic lifestyle, as she’s no stranger to promoting wellness, self-care, and holistic living. She even lives part-time on a Mississippi farm, not far from her grandmother and great-grandmother’s farm, where she spent some summers as a child.
While her grandmother and great-grandmother have passed on, Dreka reflects on that time in her life and how having a farm as an adult is her getting back to her roots. “So the farm was purchased back in 2017, and it was like, ah, that'll just be a place where we go when we're not touring or whatever,” she said.
“But COVID hit, and I was there, and I was on the land, and I just started remembering back to going to my grandmother's during the summertime and freaking picking peas and going and eating mulberries off the freaking tree in the bushes.
“And she literally had cotton plants. I know some people feel weird about picking cotton and stuff. She had cotton plants and I would go and pick cotton out of her garden. And she had chickens, and I literally just broke down in tears one day when I was on the farm just doing all the things, and I'm like, ‘Oh my gosh. I'm literally getting back to my roots.”
"I literally just broke down in tears one day when I was on the farm just doing all the things, and I'm like, ‘Oh my gosh. I'm literally getting back to my roots."
You can catch glimpses of Dreka’s farm life on Instagram, which shows her picking fruit and vegetables and loving on her animals like her camel Eessa. Her passion for growing and cultivating led her to try and grow all of her ingredients for her wellness brand, Dreka Wellness. However, she quickly realized that she might be biting off more than she could chew. But that didn’t stop her from fulfilling her vision.
Watch below as Dreka talks more about her business, her wellness tips, breaking toxic cycles, becoming a doula, and more.
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As far as the dating apps that led to some type of long-term success, a survey from The Knot says that Hinge leads the pack (with 35 percent) followed by Tinder (with 25 percent). Then, if you take into account a Lovehoney survey of 2000 people, which revealed that 60 percent of men and 42 percent of women have admitted to having sex on the first date — uh-huh, now do you see why a piece like this is both relevant and necessary?
Virtual dating isn’t going anywhere any time soon, and although “first date sex” used to be somewhat taboo, clearly, that isn’t even close to being the case anymore. So, since both are a big part of our culture, let’s explore how to approach merging the two (if you’ve been wondering if you should…that is).
What’s the Purpose/Agenda of a First Date?
GiphyOkay, so let’s start by laying a bit of foundation because, personally, I am a big believer that when we don’t know the purpose of something, it’s almost guaranteed that on some level and in some way, we are going to either misuse or abuse it — dating is no exception. And what’s the purpose of a first date?
To get to know if there is more of a connection than just an initial attraction or surface-level chemistry (check out “What's The Difference Between Chemistry And Compatibility?”). And honestly, that’s why all of the social media debates about women expecting a $200 date off the rip and men expecting sex in return if that does indeed go down are nothing short of nauseating to me. ON BOTH SIDES, all it sounds like is a transactional hustle.
Nothing about that type of motive says, “I’m trying to see if there is something real here;” both are about nothing more than how much juice is in the squeeze (and that’s putting it politely — SMDH).
Although there are dozens of reasons why I think dating has become so chaotic for a lot of people these days, here are two of the main ones as it relates to this article in particular:
1) More people need to remember what author M. Scott Peck once said, "Until you value yourself, you won't value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it." When it comes to first dates, specifically, that’s why I don’t get what all of the drama is behind coffee dates. While TikTok is telling you that agreeing to those means that you are settling, if you value your time, you absolutely aren’t — especially if there have been no real conversations prior to the initial meet-up.
A coffee date or drinks after work doesn’t say, “He’s cheap,” so much as, “If there’s something here, then we can build on that. If there’s not, you got 30 minutes of my time; no harm, no foul.” Time is something that you can never get back, so why waste it? Besides, if you feel the need to brag about going on an expensive dinner, go out with some of your girls, and y’all split the tab.
At least you’ll know that you’re going to have a good time because you actually know those people (by the way, if that triggers you, that already reveals a lot, as far as your motives are concerned). No one should need a date to validate them — especially a first date. If they do, there’s some stuff going on that a date, a man nor a relationship is going to fix (just sayin’).
2) Talk to the long-term couples who are 50+ (if they’re 50, that now means they were in college in the early 90s, by the way). Ask them about what dating was like when they were younger and single. I’m wiling to bet that, for one thing, expensive ass first dates weren’t even on their radar, and two, it was rare that they went out with someone before talking to them, at least a couple of times on the phone.
Yep, as semi-antiquated as it may sound in the world that we live in now, it was pretty standard that if you saw a stranger who caught your attention, you would get their number, talk on the phone to see how the two of you vibe and then some successful conversations down the line, if you both believed that something was there between the two of you, you would mutually decide to go on a date.
And because some type of foundation was already laid, if the first date did end up going beyond just coffee or drinks, it was because the two of you had already invested time — you already knew that you wanted more. And honestly, to me, that is one of the benefits of virtual dating or talking on the phone for a couple of weeks before going on a first date — you can actually get to know someone…beyond what you can get out of them.
“Sex on the First Date” Has Levels to It
GiphyAnd when you take into account all of what I just said, it seems to me that there are two kinds of “sex on the first date” scenarios that should be pondered. One is the kind where you meet someone, text each other about a place to meet up, get to know each other for 1-2 hours max, and then go back to somebody’s place to get it in. The other is when you meet someone and, whether online or by phone, you both decide to ease into things by talking first…for a while. Then, after an awesome first date, sex comes naturally to both of you.
And how long is a while? I mean, because this platform is for women — until you feel safe. Until you have asked the kind of questions that make you feel like you want to spend more time with him on a deeper level. Until you get that his intentions aren’t just shallow…or physical. Until you know that you aren’t just attracted to him — you know that there are things about his personality and character that you actually like. Until you want to go on a first date.
And unless the two of you are talking for 2-3 hours a day, every day, for a week straight, you can’t really come to this kind of conclusion in record time. It may take a few weeks or even a few months — and that is perfectly fine. Someone who wants to know you for you is going to be okay with communication being set as the foundation of the relationship that the two of you are potentially building anyway, so…by the time that you both decide to meet up for a first date, it will be the icing on the cake.
And, because you actually like him for him, the kind of date that he plans, you won’t be grading it based on nothing more than the price tag; it’s a win for all parties involved.
Okay, so if you do decide to go the route of a “slow build,” you do take your time before a first date, and then you do decide to have sex with him — does it constitute as “first date sex”? I mean, technically, probably. However, the reputation of first-date sex is someone is getting to know everything about you (you know what I mean) without knowing much about you at all. On the other hand, when you opt to communicate for some time before a first date (and the sex that follows), it’s not so casual…and yes, that makes it — different.
3 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Sleeping with Anyone New
GiphyNow that I hope I’ve brought some peace of mind to if it’s a standard “sex on the first date” type of situation if you’ve been virtually hanging out with someone for a while, let’s talk about some of the main things that you should consider before having sex with anyone who you are beginning to interact with on a physical level.
What is the energy like?
One day, I’m going to write about how true it is that energy is exchanged during sex. A big part of the reason is that we are sources of energy — and honestly, the kind of energy that you experience with someone when you’re not in their physical presence vs. when you actually are? It tends to be quite different.
Therefore, it’s a good idea to intentionally “tap in” to see what kind of vibes are exchanged when you’re around each other before deciding to take it there because there is a possibility that how you feel about someone in person may be different than how you do online or over the phone.
What type of sexual accountability conversations have you had?
One of the biggest mistakes that people make is thinking that real life is a soap opera or a rom-com — for instance, you can have sex, and there be no real consequences. Chile, please.
Don’t ever put yourself in the position where you think that the two of you connect so well that you shouldn’t talk about how often you both get tested, what your approaches are to birth control, what your sexual deal-breakers are, and what your sexual expectations may be.
And listen, if all of this seems like too much for a first date, then you already have your answer about if you should have sex after the first date…RIGHT? Because how is it that you don’t want to get into his mind, yet you’re okay with him getting inside of you? Nope. Uh-uh. Nada.
What would sex on the first date accomplish?
Back when I used to mentor teen moms in public schools here in Nashville, I would always call them out whenever they told me that unprotected sex “just happened.” NO. IT. DOES. NOT. There are so many steps involved, from calling the person, setting up a plan, meeting up, pulling off clothes, etc. — all of us have plenty of opportunities to rethink what we are doing. Same goes for first-date sex.
Listen, no matter how much you are feeling the guy from communicating before the date and even more once you meet him, take the time to ask yourself, “What will sex right now accomplish?” An accomplishment is something that brings about credibility. An accomplishment is something that makes you feel fulfilled. An accomplishment is something that causes you to believe that you achieved something great.
That said, if all you’re after is a good time and maybe an orgasm, perhaps sex on the first date will be an accomplishment for you. However, if after starting off solid with this new guy, if you’re not sure what sex will accomplish, in the grand scheme of things, pause until you know. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that — and the right guy for you will agree.
____
Bottom line, if it’s a first real date and you do have sex after it, yes — you just had sex on a first date. Although, when there has been a foundation built prior to it, via healthy communication…it’s less risky and something that you (typically) can feel more confident about — especially if you take all of what I just said into (serious) account.
Sis, when it comes to giving any of yourself to someone new — online or not — please make sure that you do.
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