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Job Search Stalling? Here's What You Need To Do Now
Going on the hunt for a new job can be both exciting and frustrating, and more of the latter if you don't have a solid plan. You might get to the point where you've sent out hundreds of resumes, attended dozens virtual job fairs, and hit "Instant Apply" on LinkedIn more times than you can count, yet still no offers. You also might be growing tired of the rejection emails, the multiple interview rounds that lead nowhere, or the low-quality correspondences about jobs that are way below your experience and pay grade. Figuring out how to find your next gig can be more than draining.
If any of this sounds familiar to you or you feel seen, we've got you covered with a better way to attack your job search and come out the victor:
Elevate your online presence.
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More than 50 percent of recruiters are using social media to find job candidates, according to recent research, so it's time you up the ante on the web. You'll need to get creative, and there are so many cool and free ways to do this. You can set up a free Wix or Weebly website or a simple About.me page with your photo and resume presented in a way that is both visually pleasing, informative, and engaging. Keep it simple but allow it to reflect your personality and who you are outside of what you do. (And, unless you're in a creative industry, don't go too crazy with colors, fonts, and other elements that might be distracting. Keep it clean and let the storytelling about who you are and what you offer shine).
You can also spruce up your Instagram, LinkedIn, or Twitter pages by getting some professional headshots done and updating a bit more often with posts that include insights on solving a problem or highlights on your niche knowledge, experiences, and expertise.
If you're into shooting videos, start a YouTube channel discussing issues you're passionate about (job- or industry-related, of course) and again, keep it simple (unless you're a whiz at video production and editing).
Go old-school.
So you've only been relying on email or private messages? Sis, you might have to actually visit a few offices in person (if safe and possible). Call and inquire about a recent job post, and ask about additional information so that you can strategize a better way to approach applying. Connect with an executive assistant, receptionist, or maybe even someone who might become your future coworker—in person.
Attend in-person fairs instead of virtual ones. While you might not want to shove a resume in someone's face at a conference or panel, a brief face-to-face encounter is a good icebreaker for when you do follow up with an email about a recent job opening.
(And take your resume anyway. You never know if your perfect moment to shoot your shot might come up. Be sure to read the room. This is where good social skills and strategic initiative come in.) If unsure, just get their contact information to cultivate a relationship and work your way toward that perfect moment to pitch yourself in the future.
Get a coach or connect with a head hunter.
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Sometimes it's best to get some help from a professional who can be your sounding board for your frustrations, assist you in creating a better strategy, and connect you with legitimate job leads. This is especially important when you have more than 10 years of experience in the industry because, at that point, you'd be looking for opportunities that reflect your growth, career fulfillment needs, and salary requirements.
The best place to start is LinkedIn because you want to be sure you're getting a person who's about results and has credibility.
Many career coaches and headhunters detail their experience, background, methods, and success stories on LinkedIn, and finding one can lead you to others who might be a good fit.
Also, try contacting your former college's career center or alumni office to get information on people who provide coaching or headhunting services. Check out resources like the National Career Development Organization (NCDO) or the Professional Organization of Resume Writers and Career Coaches to find reputable professionals. (And here's a good time-saving trick: Do a bit of digging into their social pages. Oftentimes you'll find professionals you can reach out to among their follower lists.)
Consider civic, internship, fellowship, or volunteer work.
Don't roll your eyes just yet. When you're unemployed or are changing careers, ain't nobody got time to give away their time for free or for lower pay than expected. But hear us out, sis. If you've already been hitting job search walls for a while, it won't hurt to offer a few hours a week toward volunteering for an organization, entrepreneur, or company initiative in order to spark relationships, showcase your abilities and build trust in your potential to become a paid employee. (And even if it doesn't lead to a job at that company or brand, it's an experience that you can market for another opportunity.)
It could be a breast cancer advocacy walk where you know certain sponsors and their key executives will be involved. It could be a church event, local school program, a blood drive—even a political or advocacy march or demonstration. Position yourself to not only do good but to be in the presence of others who might have job leads.
Internships and fellowships (even if you're past your college days) are also great for getting your foot in the door and gaining experience.
Post-grad internships provide opportunities for professionals who have already earned degrees but do not fit the requirements of traditional internships. Most fellowships provide some sort of stipend, grand, or modest salary and might even include benefits, relocation funds, and health insurance.
Another option is military enlistment or applying for the Peace Corps (which is an independent non-military entity). The age limit for some military branches goes up to 35, and both paths provide a great way to not only expand your horizons (both mentally and physically) but to cultivate and apply your skills to a multitude of industries and roles while serving.
Broaden your standards and think outside the box.
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Don't limit yourself by the degree you earned or the industry you've always worked in. True, some jobs require certain certifications and specialized education, but many jobs rely on transferable skills. For example, you could have a bachelor's degree in marketing but your skills might be ideal for a sports organization, news outlet, or nonprofit, not just for a marketing agency or advertising firm. Or let's say you've been an educator in a traditional school system for five years. Well, that same leadership, class management, and lesson plan composition skills could be used for corporate training, research, or standardized test development.
Love fashion but you're a tech geek? Get your foot in the door via IT or graphic design, and then work your way into a different department. If you've always worked in the for-profit sector, why not explore nonprofits and use your talents there? Only looking at the big Fortune 100 companies? Why not get your feet wet first at a startup or mid-sized brand?
You have to think about the long game in order to win in sustainable career advancement, so sometimes taking the alternative or nontraditional route to gaining employment is a better idea in the long run.
For more job search tips, career advice, and profiles, check out the xoNecole Workin Girl section here.
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This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
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Love On The Brain: What Science Says Loving Someone Does To You Mentally
I dig science. A big part of the reason why is because I really enjoy researching the “whys” of things. While my father always liked that about me, my mother oftentimes had something slick to say about it (that’s another message for another time, chile). To me, it’s whatever. For better or for worse, I’m simply not someone who accepts that the sky is blue “just because” — put it on my daddy’s DNA, I guess; with no apologies in place, I almost always want to know why something is the way that it is.
And since I spend so much of my time working with couples and writing on relationships, I’m sure no one is shocked that I’ve done my due diligence when it comes to figuring out what is really going on in the minds of humans whenever they are hyped about being in love. While on the surface level, it might seem like I’m being cynical, I’m actually not. It’s more about…well, again, I’ve been working with couples and writing about relationships for so long at this point that I think it’s important for folks to know the difference between an “emotional surge” and a truly wise love decision — and being aware of the role that the brain plays when we think that we’re in love with someone? That can help to bring some perspective and clarity into all of this.
So, whether you’re in something new and you’re currently on cloud nine, you’ve been in something for a while now and you’re wondering if you’ve “lost that loving feeling” or if you’re borderline on the verge of self-sabotage or, you’re like me, and you simply like to know random information just because — I’ve got 10 things that might be of interest to you as far as what science says love can literally do to you on the mental tip.
It’s fascinating stuff, indeed.
1. Dopamine Gets Activated
It’s pretty interesting thatdopamine is a type of neurotransmitter that plays a significant role in things like how you are able to experience pleasure or create memories because both of those are quite relevant when you’re in love with someone. Well, according to science, when you feel like you truly love an individual, dopamine gets activated on a whole ‘nother level to the point where you not only feel euphoric but,it’s at the level of what alcohol or a cocaine high can produce (have mercy!) I’m not exaggerating, either.
In fact, Medical News Today once published an article entitled, “Falling In Love Hits The Brain Like Cocaine Does.” Hmm…makes you wonder if some people run up outta there marriages, not because there’s really anything “wrong”; it’s just that they have crashed from their “cocaine high” and no one prepared them for how to handle it (get into premarital counseling, engaged folks; it makes all the difference in the world!). Also,as far as dopamine goes, when men are “falling” for a woman, it’s dopamine and vasopressin that increase, while, for women, it’s dopamine and oxytocin. During sex, vasopressin drops in men, while oxytocin increases when a woman climaxes. The more you know.2. Euphoria Increases
Let’s go a little bit deeper into the whole euphoria thing. At the end of the day, euphoria is about intensity. I mean, a part of the reason whythe series Euphoria has been so popular (and jarring) is that it showshow drug abuse can put people into a euphoric state — at first in a pleasurable way and eventually on a devastating level. When it comes to love, some experts say that three stages transpire when you feel like you’re in a love-related euphoric state:arousal, attraction, and attachment. And you know what? If you aren’t intentional about doing what Ben Franklin once said (“If passion drives you, let reason hold the reins.”), you could find yourself being on a roller coaster of emotions without having a relationship that consists of much stability. Yeah, euphoria increasing can be problematic as hell if you don’t get all of what comes with that.
3. Oxytocin Surges
When it comes to the articles that I’ve written on love, sex, and relationships on this platform, I don’t know if there’sany hormone that I’ve shouted out more than oxytocin. That’s because there are countless amounts of intel supporting the fact thatit bonds people through things like hand-holding, cuddling, kissing, and definitely sex. That’s whysome experts say that oxytocin can cause people to become “single-minded” about a person, it cancultivate feelings of trust, and it can literallycreate physiological changes that cause you to seek out your love interest.
This is a part of the reason why, when people declare that they are “in love” after say, a one-night stand, my mind immediately thinks, “Eh. Sounds more like an oxytocin surge.” You don’t know them well enough to love them; you can “love” how they make you feel, though. It’s essential to know the difference.
4. Fear Decreases
Now, this is an interesting one. Something else that science says happens when people are in love is the neural pathway that is associated with things like fear and judgment. It actually deactivates itself (chile…CHILE). Yep, some studies reveal that the part of your brain that encourages you to make “critical assessments” of individuals. When you feel like you love them, that shuts down. As a direct result, in walks the rose-colored glasses, and out goes the red flags. And that’s why, when I recently read that a particular actor didn’t heed some warnings from her friends regarding her new relationship, I literally shook my damn head.
When you’re all in love, especially in the beginning stages, having folks around who don’t feel the same ways about the person as you do can actually help you out in the long run, so long as they are good friends with a solid track record, they are going to notice some things that your neural pathway is keeping you from paying close attention to. Yeah, y’all be careful out there.
5. Your Prefrontal Cortex Slows Down
Speaking of desensitized senses, something else that transpires when you’re caught up in someone isyour prefrontal cortex becomes sluggish. Why is this problematic? Well, that’s where the logical part of your brain is housed. This means that when you love someone, you may not be the best at making sound and practical decisions. Although I don’t agree with an article that said this means that love is illogical (love is sound, sane, and stable; it’s folks who jack relationships up…not love), I do think all of this is a reminder that you must rely on more than just how someone makes you feel when you’re trying to decide who to build a life with. Moving on.
6. Your Hypothalamus Revs Up Your Sex Hormones
I don’t know about y’all, but I don’t know too many people who aren’t attracted to the object of their love and affection. And so, when you do fall in love, something else that happens isthe part of your brain known as the hypothalamus stimulates your ovaries while it also stimulates your man’s testicles — and that is what makes you feel an overwhelming feeling of desire (i.e., lust) for your partner.
7. Your Brain’s “Reward Circuit” Lights All the Way Up
Speaking of longing for your partner, three parts of your brain — the amygdala, the hippocampus, and the prefrontal cortex — are known as its “reward circuit,” and whenever you even speak about your bae, this is the part of your brain that lights up like a Christmas tree. Something that’s really interesting about this particular point is, that while this is happening, your serotonin levels typically drop.
Why does this matter? Well, serotonin helps to keep your anxiety levels in balance, and it also helps you to regulate your appetite(s). This would automatically cause me to believe that people who struggle with love addiction probably have a low level of serotonin operating in their system.
Oh, speaking of serotonin, although you may never think to get your hormone levels checked strictly to learn more about how you’re acting/reacting in your romantic relationship,I also found it interesting that people who have more dopamine in their system tend to take more risks when it comes to love while those who have more serotonin are usually far more cautious. Meaning, that how you are in your relationship(s) may not be just about your personality; your hormone levels tend to have a say as well.
8. Your Anterior Cingulate Cortex May Make You Obsessive
Your anterior cingulate cortex is the part of your brain that’s associated with things likemotivation and action. Anyway, since overactivity in this part of the brain is oftentimes linked to things like obsessive-compulsive disorder,some researchers believe that the reason why some people seem to think obsessively about their partner, almost to the point of obsession, if they don’t stay on top of it, is because of how their brain reacts to their attachment to their partner.For the record, this is also the part of your brain that literally lights up whenever you see your partner, too.
9. Vagus Nerves “Sync Up”
Your vagus nerves are a part of your nervous system that starts at your brain and runs through your digestive tract. This makes them an integral part of things like your immunity, your speech, your moods, and your heart rate. As far as your brain goes, some studies reveal that after a couple has been together for a longer period of time, it’s not uncommon for their vagus nerves to “sync up” in the sense of having similar facial expressions and hand gestures being and even their hearts starting to beat at the same pace.As a direct result, the syncing makes it easier for both individuals to make sacrifices for one another in order to remain together. Share that with your grandparents the next time you see them. #wink
10. If You’ve Been Together for a While, Your Angular Gyrus Becomes Stronger
Speaking of longevity, another perk that comes with couples who choose to go the distance is the part of their brain known astheir angular gyrus becomes more active. What’s actually sweet about this is that not only is this what makes it easier for you to learn complex languages, but you can also start to anticipate your partner’s actions with it too. As a direct result, science says that many couples can finish each other’s sentences — and it’s all because their angular gyrus has gotten stronger as a result of them staying committed.
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After reading all of this, how could anyone possibly look at being in love casually? There are far too many intricate parts at work — yes, literally. Yeah, when Rihanna sang about having “love on the brain,” she said more than a mouthful…whether she realized it or not.
And if you declare that you are in love, make sure to factor in what your brain is going through. Then choose wisely. Even your brain and mental health depend on it. Also…literally.
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