Think Homeownership Is Out Of Reach? Here's The Starter Guide To Buying A House
When it comes to homeownership, many of us might be holding some preconceived notions as well as valid fears that it's just out of reach. From the unstable housing market to rising prices, to challenges with employment and other financial factors, it might seem that owning a home was something only our grandmothers or mothers could enjoy. But all hope is not lost.
In fact, research points to Black women being the leaders behind a boost in homeownership in the past few years, and even during the pandemic, we continued on our plight to leaving renting for ownership.
If you've had some doubts or don't know where to start, here's a quick guide for prepping to make your homeownership dreams a reality:
1. Get your mind right.
A 2022 Bank of America survey found that while 48% of Black women "feel confident about their finances," only 28% actually "feel empowered to take action" fueled by this confidence.
This first step is often overlooked, but oftentimes, when we're starting any new journey, especially one that involves a big change both physically (i.e. moving to a whole new environment) and financially, you'll need to set your mind on positive thoughts, confidence, and boldness. You have to know that you can indeed be a homeowner, that you deserve the desires of your heart, and that you are more than capable of navigating the process.
With high rates of student loan debt, rental income disparities, and a lot of the home responsibilities falling on us, among other challenges, it can indeed seem like a tough feat to go the homeownership route, but it is certainly doable with the right mindset, strategy, and support.
Lean into affirmations, prayer, therapy, coaching, and real-life inspiration to clear your mind of doubts and fears and use that energy to progress toward your dream home purchase. Open your mind to all the options, resources, and programs that are afforded to you and the alternative ways to reach your goals.
2. Get real about your finances.
Many experts agree on this second step, as you'll need to know where you are financially in order to be sure of what type of house you want, where you want to live, and whether you can afford the mortgage. Usually, this includes having (or creating) a budget and getting to know your expenses versus your take-home pay. If you don't already have a budget, create one and start to really get focused on knowing exactly what money's coming in and what's going out.
Also, getting into a savings routine and looking into investing, even if it's as simple as signing up for your 401K with your job, opening a retirement account on your own via companies like Fidelity or JP Morgan, or starting brokerage accounts with platforms like Charles Schwab or Robinhood. This will allow you to get into the habit of building wealth and having multiple sources to tap into in terms of financial assets.
3. Stop counting yourself out due to reasons like "bad credit" or low income.
If you need assistance with budgeting or learning more about money management, there are free resources out there (try here or here). You can also tap into local resources like nonprofits, financial advisers, or the professionals you bank with, especially if it's a credit union.
There are also resources for strategizing how to improve your credit, boost your income, and develop better financial fitness habits, so tap into those as well. You can do this! Sit down, write out your goals, work with a coach, and start one small step at a time.
Bad credit and other financial challenges don't necessarily bar you from achieving your dreams of owning a home. Look into rent-to-own options or financiers who offer home loans to people with credit under 620. There are also federal lenders that are ideal for those with low or no credit.
Go into your current bank and get to know your options so that you'll know what's actually available to you and what's possible beyond the fears or negative self-talk. Take a free class via the National Urban League or other local resources through a quick Google search. You'd be surprised what options are out there when you simply make a few appointments, do a bit of research, network, and ask.
4. Figure out your plan for your first payment and the right mortgage fit.
A down payment is often required (or at least encouraged) when you're buying a home, so once you've gotten clear on your financial status, what type of house you want, where, and how much you can afford based on your income, think about how you'll save up (or pay) the first payment for the investment.
Twenty percent of the total cost of the home has often been mentioned as a place to start, but experts say you don't necessarily have to have that much. However, be aware that when you put down less than that, you'll have to get mortgage insurance, and it will likely add to your monthly mortgage payment, so keep that in mind. There are assistance programs on the state and federal levels that can help you navigate this and even assist with the cost, especially if you're a first-time homebuyer. (Start here for more great information on this.)
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When it comes to your dream home and consideration of a mortgage, think outside the box. Your dream home might be a $500,000 ranch-style home in a major metro area but if that's going to have you living above your means or struggling to pay the down payment and monthly mortgage in tough times, considering an adjacent city or county in the same state or the same type of house in an area that's more up-and-coming.
There are also different types of mortgages that might be a good fit for you based on various factors. For example, conventional loans offer low minimum down payments but have more stringent qualifications, while FHA loans are mortgages backed by the Federal Housing Administration and are generally easier to qualify for but have stricter requirements related to mortgage insurance. (You can research more information on types of loans and how to qualify here and here.)
5. Start the pre-approval process and ask lots of questions before agreeing to a loan.
You'll also need to get pre-approved, so once you've found the right type of loan, do your research on who to partner with on your mortgage. Be sure, for example, that if you're going for an FHA loan, the loan provider is FHA-approved. According to NerdWallet, prospective home buyers should consider how a lender’s sample rates compare with today's mortgage rates, determine the closing costs, and "compare mortgage origination fees.” Become super-aware of the terms and timing for the loans and how these might change over time or in the future. Ask lots of questions or get help via a reputable consultant or coach.
Preapproval is necessary for getting the "real numbers," because lenders have access to detailed information about your finances. The process will include a hard credit inquiry, which shows up on your credit report, however, when you apply with multiple lenders around the same time, according to Bankrate, it only counts as one hard pull. This is because credit scoring models "take mortgage rate-shopping into account" and "group multiple inquiries together" if the credit checks all happen within a 45-day period. You'll need documents including W2s, pay stubs, and others (listed here.)
You can use the pre-approved lender at the end of the process, once you're ready to buy, or you can use a new one if, by the end of the process, you've found a better deal.
6. Research and vet your real estate agent before contracting with them.
Experts recommend interviewing multiple buyer's agents to be sure you're getting someone with your best interests at heart. Ask family, friends, and coworkers for referrals, look at the agent's online reviews, and be sure they're licensed in your state. Check out their Zillow or other professional profiles online and look at their track record. Ask them questions like "How long have you been in business," "How well do you know the area," and "How will you be corresponding with me, and how often?" (Here's a full list of interview questions for getting started.)
There’s a difference between a buyer’s agent, who represents a homebuyer in a real estate transaction, and a seller’s or listing agent, who is responsible for looking out for the seller, including pricing and marketing the home. Many agents do both, but some specialize in one or the other. Some states don’t allow dual agency, and it can there are some risks associated with that. There are referral agents who provide leads to other agents for a fee.
7. When shopping around, take your time and don't make hasty decisions.
Work with your real estate agent to view properties and think along the lines of making a long-term investment. You'll more than likely be living in the house for quite some time (even if you plan to sell and move on later) so you'll want to have some forethought on your why and how you'd like to live in the long term. Think about the community, how you'll live in the home, and what will best suit your long-term needs.
Real estate agents also recommend looking for red flags when viewing a home like poor tiling, evidence of leaks, or covering of flaws (such as "strong perfumes" or gaps in tile, for example). Be aware of potential issues like bodies of water nearby (possibility of flooding) or paint bubbling around windows (possible problems with ventilation). They also recommend looking past the aesthetics, lifting carpets, or asking about recent property maintenance.
While this guide is simply a snapshot to get you started, allow it to encourage you to go boldly for your dreams of homeownership with confidence and a plan. Be sure to utilize all resources afforded to you, do your research, and walk proudly into your next elevation to owning the home of your dreams.
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Your Guide To Letting Go Of What No Longer Serves You Based On Astrology
Letting go is a gift we are given and a strength that we find throughout our lives. There are times when we want to grab ahold of what we are experiencing and sensing, and times when we need to let go of something that was once everything to us or what we wanted for ourselves. The moment you conclude that you need to let something go in your life is the moment that your brain fights to make that happen for you.
In Astrology, there is an area of your birth chart that is designed for you to understand where you will be letting go a lot in this lifetime, and exactly how to do so. We dive through the birth chart as we seek a deeper understanding of ourselves and let go of what no longer serves us, and there are tools available to help us do so. If you don't know where your South Node is in your birth chart, you can use a free calculator like this one here.
What Does Your South Node Represent in Astrology?
When it comes to what we are destined to let go of or move away from in this lifetime, we look to the South Node. The South Node is the area of your birth chart that has to do with your past lives, karma, lessons, old habits and traits, gifts, and energy you are moving away from in this lifetime.
Your South Node is opposite your North Node, which is your destiny and the energy you want to move towards.
We can learn a lot from our South Node and it’s an area of our life where we tend to gain the most wisdom. By understanding why some patterns in your life tend to play out in the same ways, you can be more conscious of the choices you make in the now and let go of who and what doesn’t serve you in the process.
South Node Insights: Letting Go
The South Node is our natural gifts and talents, but also where we don’t need to focus so much of our energy on, taking us away from where we need to be developing, which is the North Node. So when you are looking to let go of something, gain a new perspective, or feel more trusting in what you are doing right now, you can examine your South Node.
We learn from our South Node by not making the same mistakes over again, letting go of what needs to be let go of, and understanding what we need in order to create space for our new beginning.
Read below for your South Node on how to let go of what no longer serves you.
Aries South Node: Letting Go of Independence for Connection
You are used to being independent and figuring things out on your own. In this lifetime, however, you are being asked to lean on others for support when you need it. You are working on letting go of the ego and focusing more on the heart. By extending your compassion for others, you discover a part of yourself that leads you toward empowerment and allows you to let go of a false sense of safety.
You are meant to experience harmonious, fortunate, and compatible love in this lifetime, and you will do so by opening your heart to others and letting go of people who don’t support you or whom you can’t count on.
Taurus South Node: Releasing Overdependence and Superficiality
With your South Node in Taurus, you are letting go of the need to acquire by focusing on the depth and intention of what you are obtaining. Your relationships tend to have a lot to do with your financial world, and these things can get twisted and distorted if you are not being careful.
In this lifetime, you are working on letting go of what doesn’t serve you by following your heart and your intuition more and focusing more on the feeling you want for yourself rather than the things themselves. You are also working on letting go of overdependence or superficiality in relationships, by connecting with the people whom you have a deep and spiritual bond with.
Gemini South Node: Finding Freedom in Authenticity
For you, letting go means following your freedom. You are meant to do things your own way in this lifetime, and the less you can focus on how you are going to be perceived, the more you can live the life of your dreams. With a South Node in Gemini, you are moving away from the commotion of life. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is traveling, getting out of your comfort zone, and being in new environments.
In past lives, you may have given too much of your focus on your social successes and business pursuits, and in this lifetime, you are meant to focus on the bigger picture. What helps you let go is understanding that once you do, better is available to you.
Cancer South Node: Trusting Yourself Beyond Emotional Impulses
With a South Node in Cancer, you are learning to trust yourself and your logic more than your emotional world in this lifetime. By letting go of feeling like you have to be the one to nurture and support everyone and allowing people to do that for you, you lead your destiny.
With your South Node in Cancer, you are letting go of emotional impulsiveness or making decisions irrationally before you have thought about them.
In past lives, you were led by your emotional world, and in this lifetime, you are meant to think more about your long-term goals and intentions. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is knowing that you are more than what you can give to others.
Leo South Node: Prioritizing Community Over Recognition
In this lifetime, you are working on letting go of the need to be seen and recognized and focus more on your need for community and soul companionship. You are moving away from the “I” and moving closer to the “We.” What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is giving your focus to humanity, the progress you want to make in this lifetime, and who you want to make it with.
You are learning how to work with others and let go of the need to figure everything out yourself. The more you connect with the people who make you want to team up and form a relationship, rather than the people who make you want to be alone, the better for you.
Virgo South Node: Embracing Compassion Over Perfection
In this lifetime, you are letting go of the need to do everything yourself and to have everything all together. You can let go of what no longer serves you by thinking more with your heart than you do with your mind and by trusting this gift of yours. By focusing more on your spirituality, emotional connections, and creativity, you let go of a timid side of you that can disrupt your relationships or the bonds you make.
In past lifetimes, you were focused on perfection. In this lifetime, you are meant to focus on compassion. By surrendering more to the flow of things, you can let go of what no longer serves you while remaining open for what does.
Libra South Node: Rediscovering Your Independence
With your South Node in Libra, you are meant to experience the gifts of independence, freedom, and inner clarity in this lifetime. In the past, you may have been more dependent on the people around you and made a lot of your focus on love. However, in this lifetime, you are being reminded to not lose your identity in others. You can let go of what no longer serves you by only moving towards the things that feel authentic to you.
You are meant to feel confident, inspired, and free in your relationships, and if you don’t feel this way, then that is a sign you are around energy that doesn’t serve you. You are meant to do things your own way in this lifetime.
Scorpio South Node: Letting Go of Struggles and Embracing Ease
With your South Node in Scorpio, you have lived many lives and have experienced a lot emotionally. In this lifetime, you are learning how to trust the process more and to understand that not everything has to be difficult or trying for you. You can experience great things with ease, and you’ll know you are in the right place when things are just falling into your lap.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is focusing more on the things and people who make you feel safe, stable, and comfortable. Instead of always seeking the rush or the thrill, bring your attention more towards the things that ground you.
Sagittarius South Node: Building Connection Through Learning
Your South Node in Sagittarius urges you towards connection with your community and your immediate environment. In this lifetime, you are letting go of the need to be everywhere at once, rather than with the people who matter most to you. You are moving away from knowing everything and into learning everything.
By looking at life as a place where you will learn, grow, and connect, you can let go of the things that stretch you too thin or don’t serve your heart.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is expressing yourself more, meeting new people, and spending time on a cause or creative project that inspires you.
Capricorn South Node: Choosing Home and Foundations Over Status
In this lifetime, you are meant to put more value and effort into your personal life, home, family, and foundations in life. In past lifetimes, a lot of your focus was on your reputation, achievements, and successes, and in this lifetime, you are meant to bring your energy more to the home base, family, and stability in life.
You will know if something is right for you if you want it because it makes you feel safe and nurtured, rather than just something that looks pleasing to the eye. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is by focusing more on your personal life rather than your public, and what you truly see for yourself here.
Aquarius South Node: Shining in Your Individuality
With an Aquarius South Node, you are meant to shine, be seen, and express yourself in this lifetime. You are letting go of the lone wolf energy you are used to, and working on taking up space. You are able to let go of what no longer serves you by being confident in yourself and the decisions you are making.
If someone doesn’t make you feel like the best thing in the entire world, then they aren’t right for you. In past lifetimes, you gave a lot of your energy to your community and the people around you, and in this lifetime, you are meant to focus on yourself and your path more. It’s all about doing what makes you feel good and trusting that you deserve to.
Pisces South Node: Honoring Logic While Embracing Intuition
Your lesson in this lifetime is that your mind is your gift. In past lives, you were very intuitive, psychic, and spiritual, and in this lifetime, you are learning to trust and honor the logical part of yourself more. You may tend to put your all into your relationships and not get the same energy back, and you are working on taking care of yourself first before you can give to another.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is trusting your body and the signals it gives you when you are around certain people or energy that doesn’t serve. Get organized, figure out your needs, boundaries, and wants, and get clear on who you are and what you want for yourself.
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T-Boz & Daughter Chase Rolison On Their Mother-Daughter Dynamic & Giving Back To The LA Fire Department
Tionne "T-Boz" Wakins and her daughter Chase Rolison are your typical mother-daughter duo. They tell each other how it is, joke with one another, and, of course, support each other.
During our exclusive xoNecole interview, T-Boz, who shares her daughter with rapper Mack 10, reveals how Chase would help dress her for performances and do her and her TLC bandmate Chilli's makeup. Now, it's the Grammy award-winner's turn to support her daughter.
This Sunday, Chase is hosting a pop-up shop in Los Angeles for her new venture, Anela's Vintage, an online vintage fashion boutique. The proceeds will benefit the LA Fire Department, which has been working tirelessly to put out the wildfires ravaging the city.
Chase is an LA resident who wanted to use her platform to give back to firefighters in a big way. "I don't think that firefighters are paid anywhere near enough for what they do because I know I couldn't do something like that. I wouldn't even know where to start," Chase tells us.
"I admire them and how brave they are to even do the job that they do. And then also, LA just needs a better system in place to prevent things like this [from] happening, obviously. So it was just important to me, and I'm thankful that I have the platform to do so. So it was just important to me to give back in any way that I could and make a positive out of this really negative situation."
Anela's Vintage (Anela is Chase's middle name) is a vintage store that was influenced by the iconic Y2K era. While anyone can shop on the site, it's also a go-to spot for stylists who want to pull items for video shoots, award shows, and more.
The boutique is also a full-circle moment as T-Boz once had a children's fashion boutique named after Chase. The "No Scrubs" singer opens up about how proud she is of her daughter using her talents in a positive way.
"I think giving back to the fires is amazing because a lot of things that I do, I usually incorporate sickle cell," says T-Boz. "So the fact that she's giving back and it's coming through something that people love to do anyway, which is shop, you can't get better than that. And then you're helping people in the process, that's the perfect kind of event to me."
Since Chase followed in her mother's footsteps by getting into fashion, can we expect the same with music? "I mean, I can sing, but it's not the path I really chose," Chase says.
"Music is a huge part of my life. I love music a lot, and I'm honestly really good at things involving music. I don't know why I've never chose to do it as a career, to be honest, but at this very moment, no."
If Chase ever gets into music, T-Boz thinks she would make a great A&R executive because she has a good ear for music. When it comes to their mother-daughter dynamic, the "Girl Talk" artist jokingly says that Chase thinks she's the mother in their relationship and always tells her what to do. However, she admits that she has helped her embrace saying no to people who ask to borrow money.
Tron Austin, Rozonda Thomas, Chase Anela Rolison, and Tionne Watkins attend the CrazySexyCool Premiere Event at AMC Loews Lincoln Square 13 theater on October 15, 2013 in New York City.
Photo by Brad Barket/Getty Images for VH1
"I'm sucker free Sunday in the department of when people are sick, or say they sick, some of them be lying," T-Boz says. "But, you know, like, I have a soft spot there--"So I have said no all last year, at the end of the year, and all this year, even though we're in the beginning, I still said no."
The multi-platinum artist reveals she recently moved to Tennessee and is looking forward to writing with country artists. She also wants to get into producing films and is currently working on a TLC Broadway play. "It's not going to be typical, like behind the music and all that. It'll be more like the strength and triumph of three females and probably through the islands of the lyrics of our songs, if that makes sense," T-Boz explains.
"So I think it'll be done differently. It's time consuming. This is the third year we've been working on it, but it actually will hit Broadway next year, and I'm nervous about that. Like, she gets nervous. I get nervous."
The next steps for Chase include growing Anela Vintage and having a storefront. The pop-up shop will be held Sunday, January 26th, at 2520 Sunset Blvd, Los Angeles, CA, from 3- 9 PM.
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Feature images by David Livingston/Getty Images, @chaserolison/ Instagram