2024 Dating Landscape: How Black Singles Are Redefining Dating Norms & Preferences
In 2024, there’s tons of thought and strategy that can go into dating online. While dating apps offer a convenient space to find potential partners, it’s become more complicated by the day to know just how to land a worthwhile match at all. With paywalls, roses, and Super Likes to push past while using dating apps, a common sentiment among singles is: do these apps really want us to find love at all?
Dating hopefuls are taking time to reevaluate their approach to dating as many discussions surrounding online dating are significantly influencing user behavior, particularly among Black singles. According to Jonathan Kirkland, Head of Brand and Marketing for BLK, these conversations shape the thoughts, expectations, and actions of singles and how they engage with dating platforms.
“The Black conversation shapes up the online dating world big time. We’ve seen how discussions around inclusivity, authenticity, and cultural relevance have driven more users to [dating] platforms, where they feel represented and understood,” Kirkland tells xoNecole. “But hey, it's all about personal vibes. Instead of buying into the hype, we're all about our community creating their own stories and shifting the narrative.”
How Online Dating Discourse Shapes Gen Z and Millennial Dating Preferences and Behaviors
Ilka & Franz/Getty Images
Across different age groups, distinct shifts in dating preferences and behaviors have been observed. Kirkland tells us that Gen Z prioritizes authenticity, social awareness, and online connectivity, while Millennials are focused on sharing values, pursuing their aspirations, and authentically representing their cultural identity.
These changes are not only shifting how singles are approaching the app, they’re influencing the flexibility in what was once seen as “non-negotiables" in long-term desires that are now becoming plausible considerations.
In a recent survey conducted by BLK, 100% of Gen Z and Millennials who participated in the study said they'd be open to starting a family with a friend. “It’s like, life's throwing them curveballs, and they're flipping the script on what family means,” Kirkland explains.
“Gen Z sees this whole platonic co-parenting thing as a game-changer for how we do families, making things more flexible and diverse. Millennials say it's all about building up your chosen family and locking down those intentional connections. Times are definitely changing.”
As culture evolves and social norms shift, these findings show that daters across generations are embodying a sense of adaptability in order to create the life they desire and love they deserve. That’s why we’ve tapped BLK’s Johnathan Kirkland to put us onto the 2024 dating trends that will help you win at love.
On the top trends singles can look forward to in the 2024 online dating space:
“One trend is ‘dawn dating,’ where you squeeze in dates before your workday kicks off. This offers a new level of convenience and efficiency,” he explains.
“And since it's an election year, get ready for 'partisan dating.' That's where singles prefer connecting with someone who's vibing on the same political wavelength. And with so many young voters more into the issues rather than the candidates, expect some real deep convos over policy matters.”
“Plus, we’re going to see more of a focus on looking after your mental health while you're dating. Platforms are rolling out initiatives to help you build solid relationships, while also prioritizing your own wellbeing,” he adds.
On the best icebreakers to hit a conversational flow with new matches:
Kirkland says that while breaking the ice can be difficult, one way to break the ice is to throw out questions that show your genuine interest. “Ask about their passions, where they love to travel, or maybe something cool they've experienced culturally lately.”
“It’s also nice to toss in a fun pop culture question, like, ‘So, are you #TeamMegan or #TeamNicki?’ It's all about getting that convo flowing.” he suggests. "BLK recently rolled out new profile prompts in our app last year to help spark these conversations. They're little conversation starters you can display on your profile, written or even voiced, so people can slide into your DMs without any awkwardness.”
On the best practices for users looking to connect with men who have aligned dating goals and avoid hookup culture:
“If you're on the lookout for that long-term love, you know it must be with someone who’s on the same page as you. That's where setting intentions in your profile comes in,” Kirkland shares.
“Be crystal clear about what you're after. And when you're scoping out potential matches, keep an eye out for those little signs that they're ready for something serious, too. Look for hints in their profiles, like if they're talking about their future goals or if your interests and values seem to click. But it's not all about what's written down. When you start chatting, keep it real and open. Lay it all out on the table early on—no beating around the bush.”
"Be crystal clear about what you're after. And when you're scoping out potential matches, keep an eye out for those little signs that they're ready for something serious too."
He continues, “Whether it's long-term love, a casual vibe, or just making new pals. No more wasting time on matches that aren't on the same page as you.”
On the advice he’d give to users who want to give dating apps another try, but are discouraged to do so:
“Let’s be honest. Dating apps are like any other technology —they're constantly evolving. So that app you checked out last year may have added new features, cool filters, and better ways to connect,” Kirkland says.
“If you're feeling a bit anxious about diving back into the dating app world, remember this: every swipe, chat, and date is a chance to learn something new about yourself. It's all about growth and discovery. Keep an open mind, but don't forget to set some boundaries and stay true to yourself. And if it all gets a bit overwhelming, take a breather.”
He adds, “Focus on some self-care, hit up your friends for a pep talk, or even chat with a pro if you need to. Because hey, who knows? The perfect match might just be a swipe away — so keep swiping.”
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by blackCAT/Getty Images
- The 2024 Dating Trends We're Marveling Over ›
- Dating Apps Are Out, Meeting People IRL Is In — And Here’s How To Do It. ›
- I Didn't Believe In Online Dating Until I Met The Love Of My Life On Tinder ›
- These Are The Best Dating Apps For Black Women — Trust Me ›
Aley Arion is a writer and digital storyteller from the South, currently living in sunny Los Angeles. Her site, yagirlaley.com, serves as a digital diary to document personal essays, cultural commentary, and her insights into the Black Millennial experience. Follow her at @yagirlaley on all platforms!
The Final Mercury Retrograde Of 2024 Is Here—How This Bold Energy Will Shift Your Perspective
The final Mercury retrograde of the year arrives this month, and this is an opportunity to close one chapter and prepare for a new one. Mercury retrogrades are the time of the year when you take a step back, assess where your life currently is, and be a little more flexible with how things are playing out for you. When Mercury is in retrograde, miscommunications and misdirections are more likely; however, this isn’t the time to fear where you are headed; it’s more about looking at things from a different perspective right now.
Mercury enters Sagittarius on November 2, will be retrograde from Nov. 25 until Dec. 15, and will be in this sign until Jan. 8, 2025. Mercury in Sagittarius is bold and outspoken but, in retrograde, can come across as impulsive and brash. Thinking before speaking is important right now, and so is considering your values and interests before committing to something new. Since Sagittarius rules long-distance travel, this isn’t the best time to plan a new trip or to rush the ones already in place.
Consider where you want to be, and take your time getting there.
What to Expect from Mercury Retrograde in Sagittarius
A little more than a week after Mercury goes retrograde in Sagittarius, Mars goes retrograde in Leo. With these important transits happening in fire signs, energy can be misdirected right now. It’s about looking at the full picture and not overwhelming yourself with too many options or interests. Take your passions and align them with your heart and willpower, without confusing inspiration with ego. Emotions are running high, yet this activation is creating a breakthrough in personal development before the year ends.
Read below to see how this Mercury retrograde transit will be for you. Read for your sun sign and rising sign.
Your Sun Sign and Rising Sign Horoscopes for Mercury Retrograde in Sagittarius
ARIES
Mercury goes retrograde in Sagittarius, and you are focused on the bigger picture right now, Aries. With Mercury retrograde in your 9th house of adventure over the next few weeks, this is the time to expect the unexpected and to go at your own pace. Don’t rush the clarity that is meant to bloom for you right now, and take things one day at a time.
Even if you don’t have all the answers you need right now, there are still some important truths and insights to gain. You are in the process of reinventing yourself and your life, and the universe is helping you get the space in order to do so. If you are traveling over the next few weeks, remember to be flexible and to go over plans thoroughly.
TAURUS
Mercury goes retrograde, and you enter a time of change and rebirth, Taurus. This transit, for you, is an opportunity to gain balance, perspective, and empowerment. Your commitments and close partnerships are being addressed right now, and you are seeing where your needs are being met and where they aren’t. You are on a journey of letting go and allowing more, and this is the time to focus on being more flexible rather than controlling outcomes.
This retrograde could also be affecting your shared finances and earnings, and this is a good time to take another look at the money coming in and the money going out and make sure things are in order here. Trust your intuition right now, Taurus.
GEMINI
Mercury goes retrograde in your sister sign, Sagittarius, and you are ready for a fresh perspective in love. This retrograde will highlight your 7th house of partnership, connection, romance, and inner harmony, and your heart is figuring things out right now. Confusion or disagreements are more likely within your relationship dynamics, and this is the time to address what your partnerships need.
If you have been feeling out of balance when it comes to love, then this is the time to get things back on track.
This Mercury retrograde is helping you gain a new perspective and reminds you that you deserve the love you are looking for. Use this time to forgive, grow, and use better judgment regarding matters of the heart and the relationships you are building in your life right now.
Coveteur
CANCER
This Mercury retrograde transit for you is a chance to gain some renewed clarity regarding your health, well-being, and work life. You could be feeling more pressure to perform and have it all together on the job, and there is a need to delegate, let go, and take care of your health more right now, Cancer.
This transit will highlight where some cracks are seeping, where you may need to build stronger foundations and healthier daily routines, and also how you can manage a better work/life balance. Your daily lifestyle may feel a little more difficult to find consistency in right now, and this is because new avenues and perspectives are waiting for you to grab ahold of. Overall, use this time to listen to your inner voice and do more of what feels right for you and your body.
LEO
Mercury goes retrograde in Sagittarius, and this transit highlights your 5th house of romance, creativity, passion, and happiness, Leo. This retrograde is an opportunity for you to address what and who makes you happy and how you can show up more for these fortunate experiences in your life. You are looking at if you’ve been making your happiness as much of a priority as it should be this year and also taking a look at what sources help you align with that energy altogether.
This time is about being a little bit more flexible, doing things differently, and being open to a new perspective. Relationship developments are also providing your heart more clarity right now, and you are balancing your needs with the needs of your partnerships and creative ventures.
VIRGO
Your ruling planet Mercury goes retrograde before the year ends, and this is helping you rebuild your foundations, Virgo. Mercury will be retrograde in an area of your life that has to do with your home, history, family, and emotional stability- and you are getting a new grasp on things here.
Where you have been planting your seeds and building for your future are coming up for review during this time, and you are gaining clarity on which of these foundations is stable enough to continue to build upon. You could be feeling less secure than you would like to right now, and this change of pace is helping you reassess your goals and figure out what is worth it for you and the legacy you want to live.
Coveteur
LIBRA
Mercury goes retrograde in Sagittarius, and the focus turns towards your communication channels, Libra. Mercury retro is already a more chaotic time when it comes to communication, and with this retrograde also happening in your 3rd house of insight and communication, you may feel this heaviness a little more right now.
This transit, for you, is about taking your time getting your message across, being patient while traveling and running errands, and giving yourself space to gain some new clarity.
Meditation, journaling, and talking to someone who can support you are therapeutic, and know that your voice deserves to be heard. You are looking at ways you can take up more space and show up in the world without letting your insecurities keep you away from true connection, vulnerability, and understanding.
SCORPIO
This Mercury retrograde is happening in your 2nd house of income, values, assets, and self-confidence, and you are taking a step back to assess your current reality, especially financially, Scorpio. This is a good time to go over your spending habits and earnings, to find greater balance here, and to think about some of your financial goals moving forward.
Look at your resources, skills, and talents, and make sure what you are receiving is equal to or greater than what you have been giving. Less is more right now, and this isn’t the best time to overspend or overindulge, as you need more time to grasp your current stance on things, and how to increase your overall wealth and abundance.
SAGITTARIUS
With this Mercury retrograde happening in your sign, it’s hitting a little closer to home for you, Sagittarius. This is a good time to refine your goals and direction in life and how you want to show up right now. You deserve to be able to change your mind when you need to, and you are thinking about some of the things you have done and what you want to do moving forward.
Miscommunications are more likely while Mercury is in retrograde, but you can use this as a source of empowerment, knowing that you are living in your truth and allowing yourself room to grow in the process. Remember to be a little kinder to yourself during this transit and to give yourself the grace you need right now.
Coveteur
CAPRICORN
This Mercury retrograde for you, Capricorn, is about rest and taking care of your emotional world. You are being given the opportunity to spend more time alone, to gather your strength, and to heal before you enter the new year. A lot has happened, and there have been many changes in your world this year. This Mercury retrograde is here to help you find acceptance and closure.
You are in a preparation stage right now, and things can feel a little more lonesome in this energy, but with a different perspective, you can see just how much of this space your heart truly needs right now. The past is coming up for you to see things in a new light, and you are ready to gain some renewed insight, closure, and healing.
AQUARIUS
This Mercury retrograde highlights your friendships, community, and your hopes and dreams, Aquarius. You are being reminded of the importance of connection, but more significantly, of good connections. You are looking at who and what surrounds you right now and gaining clarity on whether this energy matches who you are and the things that you stand for.
Your social circle and the people around you are shifting as the power dynamics do, and you are finding your place and purpose amidst this change. It’s about identifying who and what makes you feel good and aligning things in your life to bring in more of that energy. Don’t be discouraged right now; find your people and ask for support.
PISCES
Your career and ambitions are the focus during this Mercury retrograde, Pisces. You have a lot to address here, and you are gathering your skills and talents and reminding yourself that you are worthy of your dreams. Miscommunications and setbacks are more likely within your professional world, but they are here to ask you if what you are striving for, is really what you need right now.
You are thinking a lot about how you show up in the world, what you want to be known for, and what successes you still want to obtain. This isn’t the time to let anyone’s idea or vision of you define who you are; rather, define that for yourself. Show up as you want to be seen, and don’t count yourself out right now, Pisces.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by We Are/Getty Images
Prayers Answered: The Power Of Faith In Ciara & Russell Wilson's Marriage
When Ciara prays, things happen.
We stalked Ciara for years asking for the prayer she recited to get her fine, God-fearing husband Russell Wilson. She finally gave it to us on Summer Walker’s album, Still Over It, saying, “I pray the next man in my life will be my husband. I pray he loves me, leads me, guides me, reassures me. I pray that he holds me. I pray that I have everything I want and need in him. I pray he will love me the way that you love me. Your love is unconditional. You are the way, the truth, and the life. In you, there's hope.” And boy did the man upstairs deliver.
The relationship between Ciara and Russell Wilson has been one of the most admired in the entertainment and sports worlds. Known for their strong partnership, love for family, and public displays of affection, the couple has become a symbol of #RelationshipGoals for many. They’ve managed to build a strong, blended family and continue to inspire many with their partnership both on and off the field.
Here’s an extensive timeline of their relationship, from their initial meeting to becoming a powerhouse couple:
2015: The Beginning
Ciara and Russell Wilson attend The 2015 ESPYS at Microsoft Theater on July 15, 2015 in Los Angeles.
Kevin Mazur/WireImage/Getty Images
March 2015: Ciara and NFL quarterback Russell Wilson were first spotted together at a Seattle Mariners game. This appearance sparked rumors about a potential romance between the two.
April 2015: Russell Wilson attended the White House State Dinner as Ciara’s date. This public appearance made headlines, as the pair looked stunning together, confirming speculation about their relationship.
May 2015: In an interview with The Rock Church, Wilson shared that they were practicing celibacy, stating they were "dating with purpose." He mentioned that God spoke to him about leading the relationship in this way, a move that gained significant media attention.
2016: Engagement and Wedding
March 2016: Russell proposed to Ciara while they were on vacation in the Seychelles. He shared the news on social media with a video captioned, “She said Yes!!! Since Day 1, I knew you were the one. No Greater feeling... #TrueLove."
July 6, 2016: Ciara and Russell Wilson got married in a private ceremony at the historic Peckforton Castle in Cheshire, England. The event was attended by close friends and family, including celebrities like Kelly Rowland and La La Anthony. Ciara wore a custom Roberto Cavalli gown.
2017: Family and New Beginnings
October 2016: Just a few months after their wedding, Ciara announced her pregnancy, sharing the news on her 31st birthday via Instagram.
April 28, 2017: The couple welcomed their first child together, a daughter named Sienna Princess Wilson. This was Russell's first child and Ciara's second, as she has a son, Future Zahir, from her previous relationship with rapper Future.
2018-2019: Business Ventures and Strong Bond
Russell Wilson and Ciara attend Bulgari at the 25th Annual Elton John AIDS Foundation's Academy Awards Viewing Party at on February 26, 2017 in Los Angeles.
Venturelli/Getty Images for BVLGARI
2018: The couple began focusing on various business ventures together. They launched the Why Not You Foundation, a non-profit organization aimed at empowering youth.
2019: Ciara and Russell became minority owners of the Seattle Sounders, a Major League Soccer team. The couple's involvement in sports ownership was seen as a significant move, highlighting their influence beyond their respective fields.
2020: Growing Family and Major Milestones
January 30, 2020: Ciara announced she was pregnant with their second child together via an Instagram post, sharing a photo of her baby bump during a trip to Turks and Caicos.
July 23, 2020: Ciara gave birth to their son, Win Harrison Wilson. The couple shared their joy on social media, with Russell posting a photo captioned, “Happy Birthday WIN!!! Mommy & Daddy Love You!”
2020 Pandemic: During the COVID-19 pandemic, Ciara and Russell were very active on social media, sharing glimpses of their family life, dancing together on TikTok, and promoting safety measures during the crisis.
2021: Power Couple Status and Public Love
March 2021: The couple celebrated their 5th wedding anniversary with touching social media posts. Russell shared, “You have changed my life for the better, I am grateful for your love and kindness every day.”
May 2021: Ciara and Russell attended the Met Gala, turning heads on the red carpet. Ciara wore a football-inspired dress as a tribute to Russell, complete with his jersey number.
July 2021: They launched their fashion line "The House of LR&C," a sustainable fashion brand that reflects their shared commitment to giving back. The line includes Good Man Brand, a men’s fashion brand Russell had previously started.
2022: Business Moves and Expanding Empire
Russell Wilson poses with his family, (left to right) Sienna, Future, Win and Ciara, following an introductory press conference at UCHealth Training Center on March 16, 2022 in Englewood, Colo.
Justin Edmonds/Getty Images
March 2022: Russell Wilson was traded to the Denver Broncos in a blockbuster NFL deal. The move brought the Wilson family to Denver, marking a new chapter in their lives. Ciara shared her excitement about the move, expressing her support for Russell’s career and their new beginnings in a different city.
August 2022: The couple launched Why Not You Productions, their film and TV production company focused on telling inspirational stories. This move solidified their status as a power couple in both entertainment and sports industries.
2023: Pregnancy Announcement and Continued Love Story
August 8, 2023: Ciara announced she was pregnant with their third child together (her fourth in total.) The announcement came via a video she posted on social media, showing her silhouette and baby bump in front of a pool.
December 11, 2023: The singer and quarterback welcomed daughter Amora Princess Wilson. Weighing 9 lbs., 1 oz., the happy parents took to Instagram to share, "We Love You so much!"
2024: What’s Next?
Growing Family and Business Ventures: With talk of another baby in the future, Ciara and Russell are focusing on expanding their family. They continue to be involved in various business ventures, including fashion, entertainment, and charitable efforts. Fans eagerly watch for updates on their growing family and upcoming projects.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Daniele Venturelli/Getty Images