

8 Things To Consider When Entering An Open Relationship
Minds. Letters. Your favorite restaurants. These are only some of the things that are best when open. Apparently, relationships now belong to that list. While Millennials and Gen Zs are engaging more in this type of relationship, it is not just a trend today. Open relationships date back since time immemorial and have been a part of different cultures around the globe. But what, exactly, are open relationships? And most importantly, is it for you (and your partner/s)?
“Open relationship” is an umbrella term encapsulating other forms of nonmonogamous relationships like:
- Polyamory - A practice and philosophy of loving multiple people simultaneously—intimately and romantically.
- Monogamish - Two people in a primary relationship but open to others strictly sexually.
- Swinging - A social practice of swapping sexual partners or joining group sexual activities as a shared bonding experience of a coupled relationship.
- Relationship Anarchy - A relationship approach that rejects rules and expectations. Instead, the people involved will follow their core values (not social norms) to navigate the relationship.
If you’re one of the 26% of Americans interested in having an open relationship, there are general guidelines, boundaries, and agreements to consider before you swing (heh) your shot.
There’s no non-negotiable, all-encompassing “rule” to follow as each individual and relationship differs. Still, establish ways to ensure you practice ethical nonmonogamy and provide emotional safety for all parties involved.
1.Do it for the right reasons.
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Start by identifying what an open relationship means for you. First, look internally—why are you interested in opening your relationship? People enter this type of arrangement for various reasons, like exploring their sexuality, a kink or fantasy, or mismatched libidos, among others.
Whatever your reason is, you shouldn’t start an open relationship to solve the problems of your current relationship or fill your dissatisfaction with it. Kicking off a nonmonogamous relationship for the wrong reasons builds a shaky base. And what does that do to an unstable foundation? It will easily topple over.
2.Honesty is key.
Honesty is the baseline of trust for any form of relationship—open or not. It means never lying, never hiding the truth, and never omitting or misdirecting from the fact INTENTIONALLY. And it’s even more imperative in a relationship involving more than two people. Being honest facilitates healthy and open communication for a functional relationship.
You need to be able to talk openly and have confidence in the person’s authenticity, transparency, and straightforwardness.
3.Always talk about your relationship.
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Open relationships are neither novel nor rare—with 4% of Americans in open relationships and 20% of them having entered open relationships at some point in their lives, according to the same report above. Hence, it should be a topic you can discuss freely, especially with your partner/s. Communication isn’t a one-time, done deal. Set a schedule and space for these communications, like a date night or staycation to nurture the relationship.
Also, determine which and how much detail to convey. Some people want to know Every. Single. Detail, while others prefer to be left in the dark on some information.
4.Identify each other’s emotional boundaries.
Emotional boundaries are hard to define and set. Still, they should be discussed. The concept of feelings is complex. And while couples often turn to a “No Emotions Allowed” rule, you might be setting yourselves up for failure as—as cheesy as it sounds—you can’t know for sure who you’re going to fall in love with.
But you can take baby steps. Start by discussing these two questions:
- Can you have sex without developing feelings for the other person?
- If you do, how will you and your primary partner address that situation?
5.Set sexual boundaries.
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And be explicit and specific while you’re at it. Set sexual boundaries in your open relationship by defining the following:
- Which sex acts are on or off limits?
- When or how do you display affection?
- How often can sex occur (weekly, monthly, or so on)?
- How many partners at a time and where?
- Is penetrative sex okay? How about oral sex and kissing?
- Will sex toys be used and shared?
I know. It gets weirdly specific and personal. But you should clarify all these stipulations and logistics before going forth and unleashing your sexual vigor out there.
6.Practice safe and consensual sex.
Aside from the emotional baggage involved (or not) during sexual activities, sexual boundaries also center around sexual risk management. You and your partner will engage in sexual acts with multiple people, which translates to higher chances of contracting STIs. But you can protect yourself by establishing safe sex guidelines. And always ensuring everything is with CONSENT for all parties involved.
For example, make sure you use condoms. Simple, readily available, and effective—when used correctly. In fact, nonmonogamous individuals are more likely to use condoms and get tested for HIV and other STIs. Great!
7.Allot time to check in with your partner.
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Regular check-ins with your primary partner are ideal to ensure they’re nurtured, respected, and excited in the aspect of open relationships, especially when it’s new. Over time, you can make these check-ins less frequent when you and your partner get into the swing of things.
And (!) don’t forget your secondary partner(s) as well. All parties in the relationship should feel comfortable, respected, and cared for.
8.Jealousy is your enemy.
Ahh, jealousy. The elephant in the room.
Jealousy is often the crux of open relationships. And that’s normal because humans have feelings, needs, and wants. Some also assume people in open relationships don’t have the right to be jealous. That’s a no-no. These feelings are entirely valid, and you can work through them.
This is where everything comes in full circle—you’d need that trust, honesty, and open communication to cope with jealousy. Reevaluate your needs and boundaries as an individual and as a couple. Then, you can build a healthy and happy relationship if you work through it with your partner.
There are many nuances to people, relationships, and emotions. Continue educating yourself more on practicing ethical nonmonogamy if it’s something you want to practice.
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Your Guide To Vacay Looks Serving Luxe Resort Wear Energy All Summer Long
Planning a getaway? Well, it’s finally that season! Tis the season of wearing less and going out more; for mini skirts, knitted tanks, sheer everything; for fun in the sun, and everything in between.
From quiet luxury to neon monochromatic and everything in between, it can be difficult to nail down the ultimate resort wear style. So many trends, so little time.
With the ushering in of warmer weather comes a similar sentiment of light layers and colorful palettes. To help inspire your forthcoming vacay looks, we tracked down our favorite traveling ladies and dove into all things resort wear for 2023.
Achieng
@noordinarynoire
Courtesy of Achieng @noordinarynoire
Credit: Jon Navas @itsjdn
Q: How would you describe your vacation style?
A: My vacation style is clothing that feels like a second skin, clothing that is airy and light and just falls so effortlessly on the body. Satin slips, silk two-piece sets, crochet and mesh pieces, kaftans, and headwraps [are] where it is at! I also lean mostly towards bright jewel tones because how are you going to really live your best vacation life in a world that is not vibrant?
Q: What three items are you adding to your resort wardrobe this year?
A: 1.) 100000% a statement bag! Really loving the versatility of colorful straw totes or statement bags from Cult Gaia! 2.) A cute gold hoop that can take a simple outfit from 0 to 100! And finally, 3.) a little black dress that I can dress up or down on any vacation I go to!
Q: What's the biggest resort wear trend you're looking forward to in 2023?
A: One trend that I expect to be popular in 2023 resort wear is definitely vibrant and bold airy knits and crochet pieces. We have seen brands such as Cult Gaia, Simon Miller, and Hanifa really kill it on that end. Another trend that is expected to be big in 2023 is the use of sustainable and eco-friendly materials in resort wear. Consumers are becoming increasingly conscious [of] the impact of fashion on the environment, and many designers are responding by creating resort wear collections that are made from recycled materials or materials that have a lower environmental impact.
Q: Favorite resort wear brand or place to shop?
A: Fe Noel and Cult Gaia and Shopbop for all the fabulous accessories!
Q: If you can only pack one item on vacation, what is it?
A: Sunscreen, 'cause honeyyyyyy this skin has to be protected!
Ebony
@fashioncrave
Courtesy of Ebony @fashioncrave
Credit: Luna @womaninmotion
Q: How would you describe your vacation style?
A: My vacation style is a mixture of pops of vibrant colors, flowy, lightweight fabrics like linen, silk, chiffon, wide-leg pants, exaggerated sleeves, maxi dresses, and detailed accessories.
Q: What are three items you're adding to your resort wardrobe this year?
A: I am most definitely adding corsets/bustiers, exotic floral prints, and [I] can’t forget the sheer flirty silhouettes.
Q: What's the biggest resort wear trend you're looking forward to in 2023?
A: I am a colorful, print-obsessed girlie as soon as I am in warmer weather! So I am, of course, super excited for all the vibrant printed pieces that will be on trend for this year’s resort wear collections.
Q: If you can only pack one item on vacation, what is it?
A: A linen oversized button-down, it's lightweight, breathable, and the versatility with styling is endless!
Marie Zoumanigui
@petitemarienyc
Courtesy of Marie Zoumanigui
Q: How would you describe your vacation style?
A: When it comes to vacation style, I have a bit of a dilemma: how can I pack all of my favorite clothes into one tiny carry-on? But in all seriousness, I'd describe my go-to vacation style as effortless and breezy. I love slip dresses for their versatility and comfort, and I always make sure to pack a blazer or two for those unexpected chilly nights. And, of course, a great pair of denim.
Q: What are three items you're adding to your resort wardrobe this year?
A: I'll definitely be adding some peek-a-boo knits for a touch of playful sophistication, tailored suit looks for their sleek and polished vibe, and, of course, some versatile and comfortable slip dresses.
Q: What's the biggest resort wear trend you're looking forward to in 2023?
A: I've been noticing a lot of white resort wear trends popping up lately, and I must say they are definitely catching my eye. I usually tend to avoid white clothing like the plague because, well, let's just say I can be a bit of a walking disaster. But I'm feeling bold this year, and I think I'm going to take a risk and try on some of the stunning white pieces I've seen around.
Q: If you can only pack one item on vacation, what is it?
A: I'm sure you won't be surprised by my answer - a slip dress, of course! It's my go-to piece for any occasion.
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Featured image by Jon Navas @itsjdn