

As Told To is a recurring segment on xoNecole where real women are given a platform to tell their stories in first-person narrative as told to a writer.
This is Poly Patterson's story, as told to Charmin Michelle.
Kel and I are girlfriends. And we just so happen to share our boyfriend, Tony, as well.
*braces ourselves*
—
Wait, soooo you're in a polyamorous relationship?
He gets to have two girlfriends?!
You mean you guys are like the Sister Wives or something?
Well...
We consider ourselves to be in a polyamorous triad, which means the three of us equally share an intimate relationship with one another.
We are by no means sister wives.
Television shows such as Sister Wives show a patriarchal version of polyamory. The women on the show are all sharing one man, but aren't in relationships with each other.
And because people largely believe that F/F/M triads are only male-serving, we often find ourselves explaining (and defending) the difference between our love and theirs.
Whatever the difference, this is how we have chosen to love. And our arrangement is what works for us.
—
I grew up in a very conservative town in South Carolina, the middle of three siblings. My parents divorced when I was 9, but both were very present in my life. Kel grew up as the only girl in a two-parent Guyanese home in Houston. We each had amazing childhoods: heavily involved in church, did well in school, and was active in our extracurriculars (dance for Kel, viola and other sports for me).
We had never witnessed poly arrangements before, but each of us certainly witnessed infidelity and dishonesty in many relationships as we got older. Actually, our opinions of poly relationships didn't even develop until we were in our 20's. We would sometimes see them on social media accounts and/or various entertainment outlets, but nothing too crazy.
Each of us honestly always thought poly relationships were interesting, but never something we imagined for ourselves.
Pictured: Cam (L), Kel (R)
Tony and I were together for six years prior to meeting Kel and we even had plans of marrying. Despite this, I was still "bi-curious" and I wasn't quite sure how to express my desires while being in a committed relationship. I talked to Tony about it—and we had casual conversations—but we didn't think too deeply into it for a few years. And since I had never been with a woman, I was somewhat terrified of the mere thought of it all anyway, so we dropped it.
Once we graduated college and moved in together, I brought it up to him again and told him that if I explore this side of my sexuality, I don't want to ruin our relationship by dating women and having connections without him.
We decided to try dating apps to find someone that we could build a trusting friendship with first.
This quickly got old because as we all know, after a while, scouring these apps became a chore. I was completely over it, so we gave up. But just as I was about to delete all of my apps, I divinely met Kel. It was her first day on the app and my last.
We met in person a week later.
Tony and I immediately connected with her and wanted to continue to hang out. We didn't know what we were in for or that we would end up in a throuple, but we were all just obsessed with each other and hung out every weekend after that. As time went on and feelings got deeper, we sort of just fell into this dynamic.
We've been in our exclusive relationship since.
And the journey has been great. Good and bad times, many ups and many downs. Poly relationships are more than an immature fetish. Triads are tough.
It would be irresponsible to tell you how happy we are without being honest about the hard times too. We struggle with the same situations that any other couple would.
There have definitely been times when we've questioned everything. And because we're in a nontraditional relationship, the smallest of ticks can have you questioning the entire arrangement.
For example, Kel and I argue the most because we are so similar. We are still adjusting to the relationship dynamic with another woman. We are also the same zodiac sign, so it causes us to mirror each other often. But our love for one another is so strong; we can't give it up. We've had to take the time to remember that any relationship, no matter the details, can feel like it's too much because humans are so complex.
And we're just human.
As for our families, most have questions, most are confused. But overall, we have their full love and support. They are supportive and trust that we will make the best decision for our lives. We're sure it took some adjusting as I had been in traditional female/male relationships throughout high school and college, and for most of them, this is their first time hearing that we are both bisexual and in a poly relationship, so I'm sure it can be shocking at times.
But as long as we're happy, they are happy, even if they don't agree.
Regardless of it all, we've found our rhythm and don't allow anyone's outside opinions to influence us. In fact, we always get a good laugh at others' curiosity, if anything. Something as small as checking into a hotel with one king bed and seeing absolute confusion, all the way to going out with friends/colleagues who don't all know we are in a poly relationship; maybe they know two of us to be together, but when the affection switches to another person, glances change.
After all, people have many ideas of what they think our relationship is but I can assure you that whatever you think, is not the case.
We just live in our truth. It's important for us to show representation of three young, black, educated millennials who have the ability to love and cultivate relationships with more than one person at a time.
So, we appreciate the people who take an effort to look at our content and ask questions to get a true understanding of our relationship. Our hope is that by continuing to educate people about relationships like ours and showing our dynamic, the F/F/M polyamorous relationship stereotypes will start to go away.
Ladies, if you are considering entering a poly relationship, or you're seeking advice on how to maintain yours, understand that our relationship take an insurmountable amount of self-work and self-awareness. You need to be secure with yourself, you have to be. Be good at sharing yourself: feelings, past trauma, your significant others, etc. Selfishness or strong jealousy wouldn't survive a day in a poly relationship. Learn to love yourself first. Be clear on your desires, understand that those desires may shift as you grow. Learn the practice of giving grace to yourself and your partners because perfection does not exist in humans.
--
As for what's next? Sustaining our happiness. We're often asked if we plan to get married, and the answer is yes. We plan to have a commitment ceremony, which will take place in the future. We also plan to continue our journey of destigmatizing our choice of love. Mostly because although we know quite a few black poly individuals, the masses still have a negative outlook on it.
We as a culture are still healing from the trauma of oppression. So many people in the black community don't have the capacity to explore the idea that genuine love exists beyond tradition, which is the reason it is so important for us to tell our story; this is why we use social media and other outlets to show what our love is really like.
We face so much judgement everyday, so much ridicule. We fight the very stereotypes that you reading this will likely have, every single day--just for choosing our happiness.
And that's OK, we are built for this.
We just ask that you understand that this happiness is ours. And that's OK too.
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Charmin Michelle is a southern native and creative spirit who works as a content marketer and events manager in Chicago. She enjoys traveling, #SummertimeChi, and the journey of mastering womanhood. Connect with her on Instagram @charminmichelle.
Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney & Jill Marie Jones On 'Games Women Play' & Dating Over 40
What do you get when you mix unfiltered truths, high-stakes romance, and a few well-timed one-liners? You get Games Women Play—the sizzling new stage play by Je’Caryous Johnson that’s part relationship rollercoaster, part grown-woman group chat.
With a powerhouse cast that includes Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney, Jill Marie Jones, Carl Payne, Chico Bean, and Brian J. White, the play dives headfirst into the messy, hilarious, and heart-wrenching games people play for love, power, and peace of mind. And the women leading this story? They’re bringing their whole selves to the stage—and leaving nothing behind.
From Script to Spotlight
The road to Games Women Play started over 20 years ago—literally.
“This script was written 20 years ago,” Jill Marie Jones said with a smile. “It was originally called Men, Money & Gold Diggers, and I was in the film version. So when Je’Caryous called me to bring it to the stage, I was like, ‘Let’s go.’” Now reimagined for 2025, the play is updated with sharp dialogue and modern relationship dynamics that feel all too real.
Demetria McKinney, no stranger to Je’Caryous Johnson’s productions, jumped at the opportunity to join the cast once again. “This is my third time working with him,” she shared. “It was an opportunity to stretch. I’d never been directed by Carl Payne before, and the chance to work with talent I admire—Jill, Claudia, Chico—it was a no-brainer.”
Claudia Jordan joked that she originally saw the role as just another check. “I didn’t take it that seriously at first,” she admitted. “But this is my first full-on tour—and now I’ve got a whole new respect for how hard people work in theater. This ain’t easy.”
Modern Love, Stage Left
The play doesn’t hold back when it comes to the messier parts of love. One jaw-dropping moment comes when a live podcast proposal flips into a prenup bombshell—leaving the audience (and the characters) gasping.
Demetria broke it down with honesty. “People don’t ask the real questions when they date. Like, ‘Do you want kids? How do you feel about money?’ These convos aren’t happening, and then everyone’s confused. That moment in the play—it’s real. That happens all the time.”
Jill chimed in, noting how the play speaks to emotional disconnect. “We’re giving each other different tokens of love. Men might offer security and money. Women, we’re giving our hearts. But there’s a disconnect—and that’s where things fall apart.”
And then Claudia, of course, took it all the way there. “These men don’t even want to sign our prenups now!” she laughed. “They want to live the soft life, too. Wearing units, gloss, getting their brows done. We can’t have nothing! Y’all want to be like us? Then get a damn period and go through menopause.”
Dating Over 40: “You Better Come Correct”
When the conversation turned to real-life relationships, all three women lit up. Their experiences dating in their 40s and 50s have given them both clarity—and zero tolerance for games.
“I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt,” said Jill, who proudly turned 50 in January. “I say what I want. I mean what I say. I’m inside my woman, and I’m not apologizing for it.”
Demetria added that dating now comes with deeper self-awareness. “Anybody in my life is there because I want them there. I’ve worked hard to need nobody. But I’m open to love—as long as you keep doing what got me there in the first place.”
For Claudia, the bar is high—and the peace is priceless. “I’ve worked hard for my peace,” she said. “I’m not dating for food. I’m dating because I want to spend time with you. And honestly, if being with you isn’t better than being alone with my candles and fountains and cats? Then no thanks.”
Channeling Strength & Icon Status
Each actress brings something different to the play—but all of them deliver.
“I actually wish I could be messier on stage,” Claudia joked. “But I think about my grandmother—she was born in 1929, couldn’t even vote or buy a house without a man, and didn’t give a damn. She was fearless. That’s where my strength comes from.”
For Jill, the comparisons to her iconic Girlfriends character Toni Childs aren’t far off—but this role gave her a chance to dig deeper. “If you really understood Toni, you’d see how layered she was. And Paisley is the same—misunderstood, but strong. There’s more to her than people see at first glance.”
Demetria, who juggles singing and acting seamlessly, shared that live theater pushes her in a new way. “Every moment on stage counts. You can’t redo anything. It’s a different kind of love and discipline. You have to give the performance away—live, in the moment—and trust that it lands.”
Laughter, Lessons & Black Girl Gems
The show has plenty of laugh-out-loud moments—and the cast isn’t shy about who steals scenes.
“Chico Bean gets a lot of gasps and laughs,” Claudia said. “And Naomi Booker? Every scene she’s in—she’s hilarious.”
But the play isn’t just about humor. It leaves space for reflection—especially for Black women.
“I hope we get back to the foundation of love and communication,” said Demetria. “A lot of us are in protector mode. But that’s turned into survival mode. We’ve lost softness. We’ve lost connection.”
Claudia agreed. “We’re doing it all—but it’s not because we want to be strong all the time. It’s because we have to be. And I just want women to know: You can have peace, you can be soft. But stop bringing your old pain into new love. Don’t let past heartbreak build walls so high that the right person can’t climb over.”
Final Act: Pack the House
If there’s one thing this cast agrees on, it’s that this play isn’t just entertainment—it’s necessary.
“Atlanta is the Black entertainment hub,” Claudia said. “We need y’all to show up for this play. Support the arts. Support each other. Because when we pack the house, we make space for more stories like this.”
Games Women Play is more than a play—it’s a mirror. You’ll see yourself, your friends, your exes, and maybe even your next chapter. So get ready to laugh, reflect, and maybe even heal—because the games are on.
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It’s officially Miss Keri, Baby season again—and if you ask us, it’s been a long time coming. After 15 years away from the music scene, Keri Hilson has returned not only with a brand-new album, but also a captivating new role in Lifetime’s Fame—the latest installment in The Temptations film franchise.
Between the album We Need to Talk: Love and her leading role in Fame, this isn’t just a comeback—it’s a rebirth. The Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter turned actress is letting us into her world like never before, unpacking themes of vulnerability, healing, and inner strength with grace, grit, and raw artistry.
Now streaming on Lifetime, Fame follows two superstar sisters—played by Keri and singer/actress Keshia Chanté—as they navigate the cost of stardom, sibling rivalry, and the dark side of desire. The film also stars Romeo Miller, Ecstasia Sanders, Nathan Witte, and Sophie Carriere, and is executive produced by Derrick Williams and Adriane Hopper Williams of the Seven Deadly Sins franchise.
As for the music? We Need to Talk: Love is a three-part album (Love, Drama, Redemption) that tells the story of a woman who’s been through it—and has risen from the ashes. “It was time to speak for myself,” Keri says.
We sat down with Keri to talk about her return to music, her passion for acting, the emotional depth of Fame, and how she’s learning to care for herself amidst the chaos.
From R&B Queen to Drama Star: Keri Gets Into Character
“Even though she’s famous—as am I—it was really her humanity that I wanted to portray.”
Keri plays Cherish, one half of a superstar sibling duo who must confront their fractured relationship in the wake of a traumatic robbery. For Keri, the role was more than a character—it was a psychological study.
“I enjoy departures from reality. That’s why I love acting,” she shares. “Psychology is one of my favorite things in life. I became a writer because I’m an observer of human nature, emotion, and behavior. I think I did a good job showing her humanity.”
The Fame Isn’t Always Worth the Price
“Keep the main thing the main thing.”
Keri doesn’t sugarcoat the industry. When asked about what Fame reveals about the dark side of celebrity culture, her answer is clear:
“It’s a cautionary tale. It reminds you to keep your family close and not allow anything to come between them—especially in pursuit of success. Keep the main thing the main thing. For me, that’s family, love, spirituality, and values.”
Three Chapters, One Story: Love. Drama. Redemption.
“I’ve shed the fear. It was time to tell my own story.”
Released April 18th, We Need to Talk: Love is Keri’s first album in 15 years—and a deeply personal one at that. The three-part project (Love, Drama, Redemption) represents a timeline of healing and growth.
“I’m finally in a place where I’m able and willing to open up more,” she says. “For a while, I became really guarded—shell-shocked, even—after making mistakes in the public eye. Whether it’s all your fault or not, the scrutiny takes its toll. But now, I’ve shed that fear. It’s time to tell my story.”
Cooking, Walks, and Recalibrating in the Chaos
“I’m not doing the best job—but I’m doing what I can.”
Between eight-hour rehearsals, press runs, and music releases, Hilson admits she hasn’t quite figured out the balance yet—but she’s trying. For her, the key is carving out small rituals of normalcy.
“I enjoy cooking. That’s my sanctity,” she says. “I’ll go home, take my makeup off, put on my rehearsal clothes, and cook a meal. I take walks. I run. These little things help me feel like myself again.”
Art Imitates Life (and Album Tracklists)
“Cherish goes from Love… to Drama… to Redemption.”
Asked which album chapter her Fame character would fall into, Keri doesn’t hesitate. “She fits into all three,” she says. “You see her go from love, to drama, to redemption. That arc mirrors the journey of so many women who’ve had to navigate pain and find their way back to themselves.”
No Pressure, Just Art: Keri Wants You to Feel Something
“Just enjoy the art. That’s it.”
After all the time, patience, and healing, Keri isn’t asking for much. She just wants fans to press play—and feel something.
“I just want people to enjoy what they’re seeing and hearing. Enjoy me on screen. Enjoy me through their ears. People have waited, and I feel blessed by that. That helps me keep it all pure and simple.”
As Keri Hilson steps boldly back into the spotlight, it’s clear this era is all about alignment, artistry, and authenticity. With Fame airing on Lifetime and the first chapter of We Need to Talk: Love setting the tone, we’re more than excited to see what’s next.
As she continues to unfold the album’s next two chapters—Drama and Redemption—one thing’s for sure: this isn’t just a comeback. It’s a reintroduction. And we’ll be watching, listening, and cheering her on every step of the way.
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