Kehlani Just Gave Us A Lesson in Sexuality
Women in the entertainment industry like Kehlani and Janelle Monae are proving time and time again that 2018 is the year that we take full control of our femininity. We are demanding pay raises, requiring orgasms, and taking advantage of every opportunity to live our best lives. This includes liberating ourselves sexually and redefining our perceptions of gender identity and romantic orientation.
Kehlani recently reactivated her Twitter account and cleared up some misconceptions about her sexuality, reiterating her status as a queer woman:
"cuz i keep geddin asked.. i'm queer. not bi, not straight. i'm attracted to women, men, REALLY attracted to queer men, non binary people, intersex people, trans people. lil poly pansexual papi hello good morning. does that answer your questions?"
She added that she used the term "queer" instead of "gay" because she did not want to be refined in her sexuality to loving only certain "types" of humans. At first, some of the terminology can be confusing but Kehlani reminds us that it's important to be educated when defining our own ideas about love and relationships.
"i always want to be corrected & educated when i am wrong. if i tweet something any form of incorrect, please let me know because i have a massive responsibility by having a platform."
The songstress has always been candid about her romantic life and told MTV News last year that she is secure and open about her sexual orientation in her music because it reflects her own reality.
"I'm very openly queer. And I thought that my music lacked representation of how my actual life is, and I thought it was important to be myself fluidly, in my music and not just in my life. My art mimics my life...It's only right that that's what I make music about and that I'm able to put that out confidently."
Personally, I've heard people use words like "pansexual" and "non-binary" to describe themselves, but I typically wrote it off without realizing that these classifications were developed so that people could better express who they are. We, unlike the generations of women before us, have the privilege of defining sexuality and identity on our own terms without persecution or ridicule of our non-conformity.
In the past, society has limited sexuality to only a few terms that narrowly describe orientation and leave a lot of room for interpretation. Advocates of the LGBTQ community have made a steadfast effort to break the standards of sexual and gender identity to help others feel secure in just being themselves. Terms like "pansexual" and "non-binary" are dictated based on preference of sexual orientation, gender identity, and/or romantic attraction and encompass a broader description.
Identifying with these terms are one of the many ways that women are taking initiative to choose who and how they love, and it's pretty lit. Here's a comprehensive guide through some of these terms In reading them, you may find that you identify with some things you didn't think you would. I know I did.
Cisgender
A term used to describe a person whose gender identity aligns with those typically associated with the sex assigned to them at birth.
Gay
A term used to describe people who are romantically, physically, and emotionally attracted to someone of the same gender.
Queer
A term used by people who are not exclusively heterosexual who may feel that the term 'gay' has connotations that don't apply to them. Usually represents fluid identities and orientations. People who identity as genderqueer may see themselves as both male and female, or fall outside of the categories completely.
Androgynous
Identifying and/or presenting as neither distinguishably masculine nor feminine.
Androsexual/Androphilic
Someone who is primarily sexually, aesthetically, or romantically attracted to masculinity.
Gynesexual/gynephilic
Being primarily sexually, aesthetically, or romantically attracted to femininity.
Skoliosexual
Being primarily sexually, aesthetically, or romantically to genderqueer, transgender, and/or non binary people.
Non-binary
Any gender that falls outside of the binary system of male/female or man/woman.
Gender non-conforming
A broad term referring to people who do not behave in a way that conforms to the traditional expectations of their gender, or whose gender expression does not fit neatly into a category.
Gender-fluid
According to the Oxford English Dictionary, a person who does not identify with a single fixed gender; of or relating to a person having or expressing a fluid or unfixed gender identity.
Omnisexual/Pansexual
Sexual attraction regardless of someone's sex or gender identity. Not the same as bisexuality - gender does not factor for pansexuals/ominsexuals.
Regardless of your gender identity or sexual orientation, love is love.
These labels should not limit us, but instead allow us to love each other and find love in ways that feel most comfortable to us.
Kehlani reminded her followers that she was not sharing her orientation to push her own agenda, but instead to help liberate other women and let them know that they the right to have preferences and make choices that truly make them happy.
"the last i'm finna say about this is i'm nevaaaaa tryna push my agenda, sis. twitter is for personal thoughts. preference exists. opinions exists. do you booboo cuz im doin me!"
You heard her right, just do you boo boo.
Featured image via Giphy
- Kehlani Reminds Us That Sometimes You Fall Before You Fly ... ›
- Kehlani Gets Candid About Handling Infidelity In An Open ... ›
- Kehlani On Being Queer & Biracial, Mental Health - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- Janelle Monae Sexuality, Sexual Orientation - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- Kehlani Discusses Her Sexuality and Privilege After Coming Out as ... ›
- Fans Educate Kehlani on LGBTQ Definitions | Teen Vogue ›
- Kehlani Reveals How Confidence In Her Sexual Fluidity Inspired ... ›
- Kehlani Breaks Down Shady Managers, Her Bisexuality, and Her ... ›
- Kehlani used Twitter to explain her sexuality | The FADER ›
- Kehlani Covers The FADER & Gets Personal About Her Sexuality ... ›
- Kehlani Clarifies Her Sexuality Once and for All: ''I'm Queer'' | E! News ›
- Kehlani opens up about her sexuality: "I'm queer" - NME ›
- Kehlani on Her Sexuality: Singer Tweets About Being Queer ... ›
- Kehlani Clarifies Sexuality Following On-Stage Demi Lovato Kiss ... ›
- Kehlani Addresses Her Sexuality Following On-Stage Kiss With ... ›
- Kehlani Openly Embraces Her Sexuality With New Track "Honey ... ›
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
I Tried Beyoncé's Haircare Line CÉCRED & Here's My Honest Review
Beyoncé is snatching our wallets yet again with her latest business venture CÉCRED. In 2023, the Texas native hinted at a potential haircare line when she posted this photo causing fans to speculate that her next project would be focused on her famous tresses - they were right. Her haircare line Cécred launched on February 20 with her first drop called The Foundation Collection which focuses on haircare first, and I can only assume that a style product line for colored-treated hair will likely follow since Beyoncé is known for slaying various shades of blonde.
As a super fan since the early 2000s, it was only right that I give an honest review of the full line and purchase the Super Fan Bundle (retailed at $265) which includes the full product line of the 8 products, as well as a branded cosmetic bag. If you’re thinking, “Girl that bundle is too pricey for me,” I can assure you that for the value you're getting, the price is quite reasonable. This bundle was an intentional and marketable way to allow consumers to experience every Cécred product.
The brand messaging surrounding Cécred has been salon-inspired, and rightfully so as an ode to Beyoncé’s upbringing growing up in her mother’s hair salon in Houston. This line is backed by science and licensed cosmetologists showing that she’s done her research and appointed the experts. Cécred's IG feed has been filled with images and videos inside of hair salons including some videos of Ms. Tina herself assisting in the styling of beauty experts who visited Cécred's private salon to have the VIP treatment!
Now, have I seen influencers, consumers, and beauty stylists using the Foundation Collection at home? Yes, but I thought it was best to experience Cécred with my go-to cosmetologist who also happens to be my Auntie Tawana. She has been my educator and go-to for hair knowledge since I was a child and has had a hand in my mom's hair health which has always been goals for me. As a little girl, my Saturdays were spent sitting in her hair salon while my mama got her hair done as I patiently waited reading Jet and ESSENCE, ever so carefully eavesdropping on the conversations of the ladies who were coming for much more than just a beauty routine, but an experience.
I’d fall asleep on the plush couch in the waiting area flipping through magazines while listening to the sultry sounds of Maxwell. And I had my first lesson in breakup empowerment when I heard Sunshine Anderson’s “Heard It All Before.” So there was no other place for me to go than to see her, and because I’m her niece, I was able to visit her private salon in her home that she calls The After Hours where upon arrival I was greeted with my favorite Black-owned sparkling Rosé, candles lit, and my aunt’s breakdown of Cécred.
Yasmine Jameelah/xoNecole
But let me refocus and share my salon experience as I tried Cécred for the first time.
If You’re Wondering…Who is Cécred For?
Yasmine Jameelah/xoNecole
When news of Beyoncé potentially launching a beauty brand hit the internet, there were a bunch of predictions of what and who the line would be marketed towards and if she’d have any wig care products as she’s known for slaying her units! But she went in a totally different direction which I love, and I’m going to tell you why. Critics have questioned if Beyoncé should be venturing into the haircare industry because she is often seen in weaves and wigs, but true Beyoncé fans know that she has healthy hair and that, like many Black women, experiments with various styles.
Cécred was created for all hair types and textures, including straight to coily, virgin, color-treated, chemically processed, and heat-styled. As a Black woman who has worn wigs, had chemically processed hair, heat-styled, natural, and color-treated hair, let me tell you, this was no easy feat! The amount of money I’ve spent on my hair through its various changes just on product alone, forget styling has been astronomical.
Cécred is serving the needs of various hair types in textures and I truly believe that this is going to make Beyoncé a true competitor in the hair industry amongst brands that are comparable such as OUAI and Olaplex. Both competitor brands have similar items at a higher price point and unlike Cécred, their products and brand messaging haven’t always felt inclusive to Black women and other hair types.
Cécred has been tested inclusively and the reviews from various hair types and backgrounds of consumers are allowing the brand to stand out.
I Tried Beyoncé's Haircare Line Cécred: My Honest Review
Yasmine Jameelah/xoNecole
Yasmine Jameelah/xoNecole
My hair has never felt cleaner and it shined for well over a week following the styling (but the oil should be used sparingly if like me, oil can weigh down your hair.) Immediately when my hair touched the sink, my aunt told me that she saw all the dirt and oils lifting from my hair when she applied the clarifying shampoo. As a girl who loves my curls, I am often judgy when I use any other shampoo and conditioner aside from Pattern, but not this time.
When my aunt guided my hands across my hair, she showed me how my curls weren’t tangled, and how she didn’t need to comb out my curls before applying the moisturizing deep conditioner or the deconstructing treatment mask.
Yasmine Jameelah/xoNecole
She applied each step with care and walked me through the process, and to my surprise, the hair mask wasn’t thick - but through trial and error as a natural girl, I’ve learned that a thick mask doesn’t always equal what’s best for your hair. She styled me with a silk press that left my hair with shine and I can honestly say that each step of the line is needed especially if you are someone who changes up your hair and deals with breakage. If your hair is healthy, you can opt out of the reconstructing treatment mask but I recommend taking the product line to your salon, having a discussion with your stylist on where your hair health needs improvement, and then purchasing based on that.
We know ourselves better than anyone else, but your stylist knows your hair better than you do. I like to lead with their knowledge first and then incorporate what my hair goals are. If you’re a girly who’s committed to hair health and has either the discipline to incorporate each step at home or can bring your products to the salon, Cécred is for you no matter if you’re a silk press or a wash-and-go naturalist.
Give Cécred a try, I’ll be using the line for my hair appointments until it runs out and if I see long-term results, it will be added to the beauty regimen indefinitely.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image courtesy of CÉCRED