Ahh, the glow-up. Many of us have a love/hate relationship with this notion. We love the person we become on the other side. But that process? Not for the faint of heart. I recently turned 37 and while it wasn’t a milestone birthday, I realized I’m closer to 40 than 30. I might not ever be the size I was when I first crossed into this decade or return to the woman I was before becoming a mom. But that doesn’t mean I can’t level up and have my own pre-mid-life transformation. And it’s the same for you.
Think about it. It takes 21 days to create a habit, so imagine what you can do in 30 with consistency and commitment to simply being your best self. You deserve that and more.
Whether you want to evolve and learn a new skill or just be proud of the person you are and the decisions you’ve made when the new year makes its entrance, the glow-up is more within your reach than you think. Here are a few ways you can begin the journey.
1.Positive Affirmations Are Top-Tier
“On my mama, on my hood, I look fly, I look good,” is one of the best millennial proverbs to date. The devil is busy, so given even the smallest chance, negativity will find a way to seep into our minds and poison everything we’ve worked so hard to overcome. Speaking positive, motivating thoughts is one of the easiest ways to glow up with a quickness. Write out a few statements that make you feel unstoppable and speak them over yourself daily. Shut down self-doubt and remind yourself that you’re that chick! Becoming your best self will be inevitable.
2.Move, Sis!
FreshSplash/Getty ImagesExercise has proven to help our mental health over and over again. It’s “a mood booster” that “has been scientifically proven to decrease symptoms of anxiety and depression,” licensed mental health counselor Joanne Frederick, L.P.C., told Shape. Simply put, according to Frederick, “Physical activity raises endorphins in the body, which are the brain's feel-good chemicals.”
Still, if you’re like me, the thought of going to the gym five days a week makes you want to faint. So you can start with something fun, like going for a walk while listening to a podcast or taking a virtual or in-person dance class. Either way, exercise is a guaranteed way to glow up from the inside out.
3.Read Something
There’s something about picking up a book (or pressing play on an audiobook in the car or while cleaning up) that just makes us feel like we’re elevating ourselves. *insert shoulder shimmy.* It could be an erotica novel, an empowering memoir, or a book that gives you the ins and outs of how to excel in your trade. Whatever the topic, any book can spark your desire to use your imagination, expand your vocabulary, and inspire you to reflect on your own life story. Most of us love a good TV show binge, but when it comes to leveling up, adding a book or two into our rotation is the chef’s kiss.
4.You Are What You Eat
AleksandarNakic/Getty ImagesCan we discuss food for a minute? Whew. For many of us, it’s our Achilles heel on the journey to glowing up. From emotional eating to jumping into the latest diet fad in every last effort to un-big our backs, it’s easy to fall victim and go from one extreme to the other. But for now, why not just start small, with one thing at a time for 30 days, instead of trying to go cold turkey and switch up everything at once?
Maybe you could commit to eating healthy, whole foods, skip fast food, and opt for meal prepping at the beginning of the week. Or take a break from eating fried foods or over-indulging in beloved sweets. There are so many ways to achieve a healthier lifestyle through our nutrition, and the feeling of having power and control over what we put in our bodies instead of letting it take over us is indescribable.
5.What Are You Looking At?
If you can’t see it, can you really manifest it? Creating vision and mood boards isn’t just for the beginning of the year. Making them all year round will help keep your goals fresh and at the forefront of your mind. Seeing your aspirations in bright colors, motivating images, and uplifting phrases will inspire you to do what it takes to stay on your journey to a better, and ultimately the best, version of yourself. You can create one for a specific goal or a generic one for multiple areas of your life. If you really want to get into it, put your board in a place where you can’t avoid it — in your bathroom, bedroom, living room, etc., letting it serve as a reminder that your evolution isn’t out of reach.
6.Sleep On It
Getty ImagesTeam No Sleep is not my testimony. If taking naps was a love language, it would be mine. And I’m not ashamed… anymore. Getting enough sleep is imperative to becoming your best self. Have you noticed that more celebrities are bragging about how much sleep they actually get? From Angela White (aka Blac Chyna) sharing that she gets 8-9 hours of sleep a day, to Oprah Winfrey’s Oprah Dailyrevealing her two favorite places are the bathtub and her bed.
This whole idea of grinding day and night just isn’t as noble as it used to be. From reducing stress, boosting your memory and energy, rejuvenating your body, and giving your heart some TLC, there are several benefits of getting a solid night's sleep, per Very Well Health. The traditional 7-9 hours of sleep each night might not be realistic for you. If that’s the case, quality over quantity is key. Either way, go to bed, girl!
7.Don’t Be Thirsty
We take pride in drinking our water and minding our business. But there are some serious benefits to staying hydrated. Via Byrdie, board-certified dermatologist Margarita Lolis notes that the Mayo Clinic recommends women drink 2.7 liters a day, that’s about 92 oz. With this magic number, you could start to see: a boost in your metabolism, improved endurance in your workouts, glowing skin, healthier eating habits, and better brain function.
Though cramping could also be a factor, that can be subsided by discovering how much water is best for your physique. Don’t let that discourage you from increasing your water intake if needed because it’s the key to literally glowing up your skin and body.
8.The Great Purge
Rockaa/Getty ImagesOut with the old, in with the new, right? Purging things from your closet to cleaning out your car makes room for the beautiful and new things to come into your life. A new season like spring or fall has been touted as the perfect time in the past, but is there any better moment than the present? From schedules and old sweaters, worries and plans about the future, and tasks like laundry (which is in a class of its own), our minds are just so…cluttered.
The first step to clearing it out could be cleaning out things that no longer serve you. Taking a couple of times a week to purge various places of your life can put you in the mental space to manifest and prepare for the person you’ve been aiming to become. A clean area can lead to more productivity, confidence, and a free mind, which is a game changer in leveling up.
9.Try Something New
One thing I love about stepping into a new era is that it’s never too late to evolve and try new things. As you go through this process, start thinking of ways to actually enjoy it. What sets your heart on fire that you have yet to tap into? What’s something you’ve always dreamed of doing but have been too afraid, busy, or unmotivated to try? With technology, virtual learning, good old YouTube University, and the #TikTokTaughtMe concept, you can literally master anything with time.
Whether you want to travel to expand your horizon and mind, challenge yourself by learning how to cook, or start embracing the great outdoors by going on a hike, taking on new adventures will undoubtedly add fuel to your journey, inspiring you to stick it out when things feel mundane.
10.Stay Consistent
Anchiy/Getty ImagesCan you relate to the shame that comes with starting over while pursuing the same goal? We get a plan, start off super motivated and inspired, ready to flawlessly knock it out within X amount of days…only to fall off. I’ve kept promises to other people, but when it comes to myself, I can justify dropping the ball. If we’ve learned anything in our journey to a glow-up, it’s that consistency is key.
Keep showing up for yourself because you deserve to become the woman you’ve always wanted to be. It’s going to take sacrifice, dedication, and commitment. Bottom line, it’ll be hard. But if you take it one day at a time and keep your promises to yourself, you’ll get there and be so proud of yourself when you do.
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Whether you're planning to meet a certain financial or fitness goal, or you're simply trying to maintain and build on the progress you made this year, having something to look forward to is always a good look. Setting actual goals, according to research, actually leads to more success than just playing things by ear. So here are a few to get you started, sis:
(Disclaimer: Not everything is for everyone, so do like my Granny always says: "Eat the meat. Spit out the bone." Take on five out of the 40 and focus on that for the remainder of the year, or do them all. Either way, this is just to get you started.)
40 Ways To End The Year Strong and Inspired
Money Moves
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1. Increase your retirement (or other savings/investment) contributions by 1%.
Experts have found that you could be leaving money on the table by not upping your contributions when you can.
2. Cancel two to five subscriptions.
You could be missing hundreds, even thousands, of dollars a year due to sneaky price hikes and "updates."
3. Create a "fun" in a high-yield savings account.
This is especially important if you struggle with the dreaded b-word (budget) and will make next year's efforts a lot less intimidating. Even if it's $10 a month, do it.
4. Put on your big-girl panties, and set up automatic transfers and payments for at least one bill.
It reduces the stress of managing bills, lessens the chance of a missed payment---and the fees that come with that---and there can be cost savings for doing so.
5. Invest in a cleaner or housekeeping service.
Bosses who value their time (and mental health) invest their dollars into areas where the time they'd spend doing those tasks themselves could be better used to focus on other money-making projects. (And yes, rest is part of that.) Get a housekeeper, sis, or drop off that laundry, even if it's once per month.
6. Donate to a charity.
Beyond the tax benefits, it's a win-win for the greater good of communities you care about.
7. Review your insurance policies and negotiate a better rate (or move on) before their end dates.
Experts often agree this is a small but mighty step to take each year, especially since insurance rates are competitive, you could be spending more money than you need to (or not enough) and your insurance rates can affect your mortgage payments.
8. Call your loan provider and refinance.
As interest rates fall, “millions of borrowers may be able to refinance and get more affordable payments. As interest rates eased down to 6.5%, about 2.5 million borrowers could already refinance and save at least 75 basis points (0.75%) on their interest rate,” the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau reports. You can also refinance student and other types of loans.
9. Stop buying individual items and stock up via going bulk.
Research has found that, among 30 common products, buying in bulk could save you 27% compared with buying in lower quantities. Water, paper products, and baby products like diapers, toiletries, and garbage bags are the top items where people see the most cost-effectiveness. (This has been a lifesaver for me—children, large family, or not—especially when it comes to toothpaste, deodorant, toilet paper, and feminine hygiene products, saving stress, time, and money.)
10. Go cash-only for the holidays.
If you set smart goals and stick to limits on things like gifts, going out to eat, or groceries, you'll see the benefits of this. Cash-stuffing is one method recommended, but something as simple as taking a $10 bill out for lunch, disabling that card for an hour, and leaving your card in a safe place at the office can give you that mindset jump start to see how far you can take your money without the need to splurge.
Love And Romance
11. Say "no."
There are clear mental and physical health benefits to saying no including the setting of healthy boundaries, creating time and energy for other self-care activities, and protecting yourself from physically harmful situations (i.e. unprotected sex or abuse). Just say it, clearly and simply, when you need to.
12. Set a fun, free, adults-only date night for once a week or twice a month with your spouse.
If busy, high-profile folk have touted the success of this, even you can make the time for quality time with your partner. And it's even better when it costs nothing. The best connections are made doing something chill, challenging, or outside the usual dinner-and-a-movie date. Play a game that allows you to reconnect, take a walk in your neighborhood to chat and laugh, or try a little erotic chocolate/edible liquid/paint episode a la Mea Culpa.
13. Go out with Mr. or Ms. "Not My Type."
I love my man, but if I were waiting out for my "type" at the time, we wouldn't be celebrating seven (going on eight) years together. Sometimes having strict, unrealistic expectations for a spouse (especially related to things like height, physical features, or career path) is what's keeping you alone and lonely.
Take the pressure off and explore all your options. I'm not telling you to stop popping the balloon on the guy who earns $20,000 less than you if that's a hard no that Jesus himself told you to skip. I'm asking you to explore other options and see what else God might have out there for your love journey.
14. Immediately apologize and pray together.
I've learned that always being "right" isn't always ideal when you truly care about someone and you're in a relationship for the long haul. Defaulting to an apology when necessary, even when things aren't 100% resolved, is a good way to prioritize peace and save your energy for more worthwhile battles. Research has even supported the benefits of apologies in relationships, and how couples married for five or more years do it often.
15. Get a Rose and discover true self-love.
Do I really have to explain this? You've gotta know what satisfies you, and how better to figure that out than to practice self-love in the bed by yourself? You can also try this with a partner, but as a woman who got on this train very much later in my sexual activity journey. I have a lot more learning to do on my own, and even in a satisfying relationship, I like to find out new things about myself, by myself.
Figure out what you're into, watch what you want to watch, and read what you want to read to define pleasure for yourself. There's a freedom and empowering element there especially if you're used to prioritizing pleasing your partner.
16. Be direct and have the "money talk" with bae.
Money issues are one of the leading causes of divorce, so you need to have those conversations before you even think about marrying someone. And true, nobody can predict the future so you won't be able to avoid some challenges altogether, however, talking with your potential spouse about how they view money, their spending habits, and the pain points in terms of their approach to money management can at least give you a glimpse into what's in store if you do walk down the aisle, move in with them, or decide to share a bank account/business/child with them.
17. Invest in the "paid" version of that dating app.
I know plenty of successful, married folk who did this and met "the one" as a result. Let's be honest: The free version is for playing around. I had a lot of fun with my "free" profile back in the day, trust me. Upgrade that photo, profile, and package, and see if the quality of your dating adventures changes when you're serious about finding a true partner. Dating coaches and matchmakers cosign this.
18. Solo travel to meet that long-distance connection.
Sometimes, your perfect match isn't within 100 miles of you, and that's okay. Make it an adventure, enjoy the memories, and book that ticket. I met my man this way and it's been a whirlwind escape ever since. If you're not comfortable traveling solo, travel or (network to plan travel) with a group via Facebook.
Career And Business
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19. Schedule coffee or virtual meetups with smart people from your graduating class, previous employer, or current employer.
I have gotten many freelance opportunities by doing this. It's as simple as connecting and offering value (or simply learning how you can better equip yourself to do so.) It's also a great way to expand your network, spark new friendships, or find out about new job opportunities.
20. Invest in a well-made suit.
I don't care what industry you're in, a suit says "power," and it's not as old-school or out-of-style as you'd think. Plus the whole experience of looking for a new one (or getting one tailored) is fun and affirming. Try these options. I swear, anytime I wear a blazer, I'm treated like a celebrity or boss, especially when traveling. I was once upgraded to first-class wearing a yellow blazer outfit, and the airline professional literally said, "You look like somebody important. Here you go."
21. Volunteer for a worthwhile project or cause that's important to your company.
If you're overworked and underappreciated, skip this one, but if you truly have the time, love what you do, and want to advance, this move is clutch. Volunteering for extra projects got me where I am today in media because I had foresight, and knew that was the only way at the time to leverage relationships, and I was able to challenge myself to learn skills that 20 years later are still bankable. That VP you can't get a meeting with will be at that gala your company is planning, so join that committee, sis.
22. Write down why you deserve a raise and ask for it in your next one-on-one.
Gather those receipts (ie sales increase numbers, KPIs met, deals closed, people acquired via recruitment, the impact of systems updates, or other tangible success metrics) and ask for that raise before the first or second-quarter budgets are being finalized.
23. Instead of quitting, write down your exit plan.
While revenge quitting is set to be a thing next year (and maybe you're among those who will be leading the trend), try the better boss move and quit with a real plan.
24. Start automatically separating that estimated self-employed quarterly tax estimate.
If you have side hustles (or you're collecting 1099 income,) baby, you do not want to neglect those quarter tax payments. Talk to a professional, do your research, and set up automatic transfers to an account specifically for paying these at the appropriate due dates.
25. Sign up for a free one- to 11-week course related to your industry—or the industry you want to be in next year.
Institutions like Harvard University and platforms like Coursera offer free courses that can enhance your skills. You can also invest in certificate courses with accredited colleges as well as tech training.
26. Hit "Easy Apply" for 10 dream jobs listed on LinkedIn.
While you shouldn't solely rely on this when actively job-seeking, using this convenient LinkedIn option is a great way to get into the habit of applying for positions. And if you're already employed, you should still be "dating" other employers if you're looking to make a move in the next six months. Keep your interview skills sharp, practice toughening up for the "nos," and get a bit of an ego boost in the process.
Self-Care And Wellness
27. Pre-schedule three month's worth of massages.
Oftentimes this is cost-effective since some spas offer deals for multiple bookings. Also, it makes an act of self-care deliberate and important, not an option. When you get that reminder call, you'll know it's real.
28. Fire that therapist and try another one.
Cultural competency in mental health support is one major problem that can hinder Black women from even bothering with therapy. And who wants the added stress of spending multiple, paid sessions explaining why something is a microaggression? Cut the cord and move on to try someone else, either via a Black women therapists channel or recommendations from others.
29. Join a small group at church.
Bedside service ain't gonna cut it and neither is going to the usual Sunday service. Join a smaller group and upgrade your efforts to connect, network, and elevate spiritually. Even if virtually, take a step to dig a bit deeper with more targeted Bible study and discussions.
30. Say no, even to loved ones.
This is on here twice, for a reason. Saying no is the simplest, most powerful micro-action you can take today to make 2025 better. No explanations. No guilt. Say no.
31. Choose one "luxury" beauty product for skincare and stick to it.
This was trending big on social, especially for millennials hitting their 40s. There's just something so freeing about not giving in to every trend and sticking to the basics that work, especially when there are quality, healthy ingredients involved. Put those orders on auto-renew.
32. Sign up for a new sport or fitness class just for fun, not for results.
It's great to be on a weight-loss or weight-lifting journey, but try something just for the fun of it. Switch things up with a couple of these fitness activities.
33. Book a staycation.
Leave the passport at home and explore a nearby community or another town in your state. There's so much enrichment in your own backyard right here in the U.S., and you don't even have to break the bank.
34. Pre-schedule your mammograms, Pap smear, and peri-menopause checkups for next year.
Take control of your health by pre-scheduling essential appointments like mammograms, Pap smears, and peri-menopause check-ups for 2025. Prioritizing these screenings early ensures you stay on top of your wellness and make time for self-care in the new year.
35. Cut off support of beauty and wellness professionals whose customer service is below standard.
This is another one that many Black women have been vocal about—from unrealistic pre-appointment requirements, to booking fees, to long waits, to unsavory in-salon experiences. Spot the red flags early, and just stop accommodating foolishness. Support salons or experienced stylists who are kind, have proper systems in place and value your time.
36. Schedule five to 10-minute moments of silence on your calendar.
Again, wellness is not optional, and if it's not on my calendar, it's not official. Sit quietly. Pray. Meditate. Or do nothing. The benefits of silent moments are almost endless.
37. Download a meditation app.
If you've found that meditation is difficult to schedule or to even start, an app can help. Try this, this, or this one, and take that step to embrace something new to enhance your wellness routine. If you're tired of downloading apps, create a playlist for meditation via Amazon Music or Spotify and schedule a reminder to do it once a day or week.
38. Invest in a healthy meal prep or delivery service.
Time is emotionally expensive, so save as much of it as possible. Getting into meal prep to keep to your goals is a great way to save time, stress, and effort. The health benefits of meal prepping have also been proven via research.
39. Create a positive playlist on Spotify, Amazon Music, YouTube, or other streaming platform.
It can be podcasts, music, affirmations, or somatic sounds. It's a game-changer. You can even set an alarm to wake you up to start your day with the positive playlist. Not into creating your own? There are plenty to choose from with a quick search.
40. Set up reminders for Alexa (Siri or other AI) to remind you, "You are loved," and "You are okay."
This simple effort can boost your endorphins and remind you that you're indeed, not alone, and you will be okay, regardless. To set mine up, I simply commanded, "Alexa, remind me everyday 'Jesus loves me,'" and like clockwork she does. She almost scared the ish out of me one day when I'd forgotten the reminder was active, but it was the reminder I needed when anxiety had gotten the best of me that week.
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