If you haven't heard by now, Yahya Abdul Mateen II is the 'it guy' in Hollywood. He currently stars in Nia DaCosta's adaptation of the cult thriller Candyman, and he hasn't slowed down since. His appeal? His unwavering charm, his statuesque gladiator silhouette, and unfamiliar name that commands the room. But he's much more than that.
He's actually an 'Emmy-winning' those things.
Additionally, he's an 'Emmy-winning' those things that has the ladies lining up at the door to shoot their inevitable shot (because when you're beautiful, you already know it's coming your way). The actor joined Buzzfeed for their 'Thirst Tweets' segment, a segment where celebrities read tweets hilariously lusty tweets about said celebrity, that are found on the internet. And listennnnn, the ladies did not disappoint.
The video opens with him introducing himself and saying:
"I'm a little bit afraid of what these are going to say because my timeline be off the hook. Let me see what y'all got."
The tweets started out simple and complimentary:
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"That's tame, that's very tame. I'll take it."
He then goes on to say that he loves his beard and he loves to cook! Ladies, he cooks! He loves to wear his grill too, which he proudly claims that ladies that love that will 'mess around and get snatched up.'
But then the ladies started asking what we all wanted to know:
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Well, we're on count 52, but I have all night to keep going. #kanyeshrug
"You should tweet me compliments more often. If you tweet me, I'll read them in the morning. I'll make a calendar of all your tweets, or just for every month, it'll be a different tweet, and I'll just read it. Keep my confidence high. I like that."
And slowly started getting to the point:
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After getting a good laugh, at the thought of women doing kegels on sight, he says:
'That's funny.'
I'm confused...you didn't know this was normal, sir? *stares in collective Black woman confusion*
The whole entire, and CLEAR, point:
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"Alright, you better holler at me. I appreciate the respectfully, because respectfully is important. But getting your back broke like a glow stick is important too."
He ends the video reading a few more tweets and even shared a quickly story about the life affirmations his grandmother would speak into him.
Watch the full hilarious clip below:
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To help you better understand why this was such a mental awakening for me, I first need to give a bit of my backstory. I’m in my late thirties. I’m an attorneyand a journalist. I own a home and have traveled the world extensively. Essentially, I’ve done everything in life I set out to do. However, when it comes to dating, I struggle. Not because there is anything wrong with me per se, but because my career and “lifestyle” often create problems in my romantic relationships.
View from my hotel room
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I’ve been told everything from, ‘I can’t continue to date you because you seem to choose your career over wanting to settle down and have kids’ by a man after only the second date to ‘Maybe if you just sat down somewhere for a while, I’d actually wife you’ by someone who has honestly never proven themselves to be the settle down type. And these are only a handful of the things I’ve been told over the years.
It’s been frustrating, to say the least, and there have even been seasons where I purposely dimmed my light in hopes that my career wouldn’t push away potential suitors. I know what you’re thinking, “Girl, why would you even consider that? If they’re for you, it won’t matter what you do.” Hey, don’t judge me, but also, I one hundred percent agree.
My hotel bathroom
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That’s why this recent moment in Switzerland was right on time. When I first walked into the hotel to check in, I was blown away by the surrounding beauty. It was a five-star property with one of the world’s most famous thermal bathhouses. Yet, it was something about seeing that 90% of the hotel’s guests were couples, that forced me to sit back for a bit of introspection—while soaking in the thermal spa, of course.
As I went through the mental conversation, there was a battle of sorts. On one hand, I knew that being able to partake in experiences like the one I was having at that moment was important to me. I knew that, at times I actually love being able to dabble in the finer things—after all, I’ve worked hard to be able to afford them. On the other hand, and sadly, I knew that sometimes being a single Black woman that publicly showcases her “luxurious” habits can intimidate men and even scare them off from pursuing you under the guise of them feeling like they “can’t do anything for you, because you have everything.”
My hotel room
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So, what is a girl to do?
Do I minimize/hide the life and experiences that I have? Do I play down the hard work I’ve put in to get where I am professionally? Or, do I risk being single in exchange for being able to have said life, without backlash?
Luckily, the joy that I felt while being at this property won. There was something about taking a full day to simply pamper myself at the bathhouse and in my in-room steam shower and soaker tub, indulging in cuisine from a 2-star Michelin restaurant and doing all of this while surrounded by an amazing group of Black women that reminded me—this is certainly the life I was meant to live and that I deserve. Even if it means that right now, I’ll just have to provide it for myself until the right partner comes along. And honestly, I’m okay with that.
Restaurant at 7132 hotel
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