Most are familiar with the BMF story, but the tale of Tonesa Welch, the First Lady who was at the epicenter of drug trafficking in Detroit during the ‘80s and ‘90s, remains largely untold. Tonesa's journey is one of resilience and transformation, as she navigated the tumultuous world of crime and emerged with a renewed sense of purpose. After serving time in prison, Tonesa has dedicated herself to turning her life around, becoming a powerful example of redemption and the possibility of positive change. Her story is a testament to the strength of the human spirit and a reminder that even in the darkest of times, there is always a path to a brighter future.
I had the pleasure of sitting down with Tonesa herself, director Vivica A. Fox and executive producer Tressa Smallwood to discuss the new film now streaming on BET+ to discuss the transformative power of storytelling and the critical role that Black women play in owning and shaping our narratives.
Certainly, Vivica Fox is no stranger to the big screen, having graced us with her captivating performances in a myriad of iconic roles such as Set It Off and Two Can Play That Game. However, this project marked a momentous first for Vivica as she stepped into the director's chair, embracing a new and exciting chapter in her illustrious career. In a candid conversation, Vivica expressed her heartfelt gratitude towards her collaborator, Tressa, who offered her the invaluable opportunity to explore the world of directing.
“I'm actually very grateful to my partner there, Tressa. She gave me an opportunity to see if I like directing,” Vivica shared. She went on to reveal the challenges and triumphs of the production process, noting that the team had a mere 14 days to bring the film to fruition, a testament to their dedication, resilience, and unwavering passion for storytelling.
In my conversation with Tonesa, we discussed the significance of her sharing her own story, particularly as a young Black woman. Tonesa highlighted the importance of reclaiming her narrative and challenging stereotypes and emphasized that telling her story is about empowerment and inspiring others. Her commitment to authenticity and inclusivity underscores the need to amplify diverse voices and broaden our understanding of the stories that shape our world.
“Because people have so many different perspectives of women in the streets, and they think we are always behind the man, and that's not always true. I just wanted to show people how it happened, how I made it through it and made it out, and what I'm doing now. I'm working on me. I'm helping other people, and I want people to see that from me,” said Tonesa.
“I was given a second chance, and that's what I want to do. Once I left the prison doors, I said I'm not ever coming back here. I'm not ever living that life again. So that's why it's important because people get you stuck in that box, and I'm not that person anymore, especially as Black women. We're so multi-dimensional. There's so many different sides to us and everyone does try to fit us in one box or put us in one stereotype.”
Vivica delved deeper into her role as a director, providing us with valuable insights into her unique approach. “I’m an actor’s director. I would know when my actors were filming if they weren't giving it to me. If we needed pacing, that's the beauty of having a director who is an actor as well,” she stated. Vivica emphasized her hands-on approach, often running lines with the cast to ensure a strong connection and delivery.
The executive producer, Tressa Smallwood, echoed these sentiments, highlighting the added value of working with a director who is also an accomplished actor. “You almost kind of get an acting coach because your director has been there,” Tressa explained. This synergy between the director and actors served to elevate the overall quality of the performance, creating a rich and dynamic storytelling experience.
Life after prison can be challenging, but Tonesa has been actively contributing to her community since her release. She works with women who are incarcerated or about to be released, helping them transition back into society. Through her support and guidance, Tonesa helps these women navigate reentry and rebuild their lives. “It's so important because when I came home from prison, I didn't have all the resources. So now I've learned about all these resources that are available to women. It was a lot of things for men but not for women.” she explained. “I love talking to the women. I love giving them hope because, coming from there, you don't have any hope. You don't believe in yourself. That's what we're here for. We got to pull our sisters up.”
It's crucial to emphasize the significance of Black women in the industry finally having the opportunity to share our stories in our own way. “Now we're having an era where especially Black women are sticking together and telling our stories. It's us telling our stories truthfully so that our audience will know our true story.” Vivica said.
“I think a lot of that also comes with being in a different time whereas Black women, we're able to be in ownership and in leadership positions where we have the say about the stories that we want to tell, and we didn't typically have that years ago,” Tressa adds.
The stories we tell and the voices we amplify have the power to shape our world, and the work of the First Lady of BMF: The Tonesa Welch Story team exemplifies this. Tonesa's journey from incarceration to community service is a testament to her resilience. It's a reminder that everyone has a story to tell and that those stories are richer and more powerful when they are told by the people who lived them. As we move forward, let’s continue to uplift and support the voices of Black women in the industry and celebrate the progress that has been made while acknowledging the work that still lies ahead.
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Feature image courtesy of First Lady of BMF: Tonesa Welch Story
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THE ITGIRL MEMO
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To help you better understand why this was such a mental awakening for me, I first need to give a bit of my backstory. I’m in my late thirties. I’m an attorneyand a journalist. I own a home and have traveled the world extensively. Essentially, I’ve done everything in life I set out to do. However, when it comes to dating, I struggle. Not because there is anything wrong with me per se, but because my career and “lifestyle” often create problems in my romantic relationships.
View from my hotel room
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I’ve been told everything from, ‘I can’t continue to date you because you seem to choose your career over wanting to settle down and have kids’ by a man after only the second date to ‘Maybe if you just sat down somewhere for a while, I’d actually wife you’ by someone who has honestly never proven themselves to be the settle down type. And these are only a handful of the things I’ve been told over the years.
It’s been frustrating, to say the least, and there have even been seasons where I purposely dimmed my light in hopes that my career wouldn’t push away potential suitors. I know what you’re thinking, “Girl, why would you even consider that? If they’re for you, it won’t matter what you do.” Hey, don’t judge me, but also, I one hundred percent agree.
My hotel bathroom
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That’s why this recent moment in Switzerland was right on time. When I first walked into the hotel to check in, I was blown away by the surrounding beauty. It was a five-star property with one of the world’s most famous thermal bathhouses. Yet, it was something about seeing that 90% of the hotel’s guests were couples, that forced me to sit back for a bit of introspection—while soaking in the thermal spa, of course.
As I went through the mental conversation, there was a battle of sorts. On one hand, I knew that being able to partake in experiences like the one I was having at that moment was important to me. I knew that, at times I actually love being able to dabble in the finer things—after all, I’ve worked hard to be able to afford them. On the other hand, and sadly, I knew that sometimes being a single Black woman that publicly showcases her “luxurious” habits can intimidate men and even scare them off from pursuing you under the guise of them feeling like they “can’t do anything for you, because you have everything.”
My hotel room
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So, what is a girl to do?
Do I minimize/hide the life and experiences that I have? Do I play down the hard work I’ve put in to get where I am professionally? Or, do I risk being single in exchange for being able to have said life, without backlash?
Luckily, the joy that I felt while being at this property won. There was something about taking a full day to simply pamper myself at the bathhouse and in my in-room steam shower and soaker tub, indulging in cuisine from a 2-star Michelin restaurant and doing all of this while surrounded by an amazing group of Black women that reminded me—this is certainly the life I was meant to live and that I deserve. Even if it means that right now, I’ll just have to provide it for myself until the right partner comes along. And honestly, I’m okay with that.
Restaurant at 7132 hotel
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