You've visited twenty different churches but none seem to fit. Some Sundays, you're excited to get up, get dressed, and go search. Other times, you'd rather pledge membership to Bedside Baptist and call it a day. But there is a tug at your spirit. Your desire for a faith community is growing by the day and YouTube sermons are starting to feel supplementary at best. You want to experience God corporately in a way that not only transforms your life but others' lives through you.
I'll say this: Finding the right church home is an important search and it takes time, trial and error, and a discerning heart to find a community that speaks to you. A faith space in which you can grow, serve, and thrive.
When I moved to the DMV last year, I knew---after three years of avoiding it---that I needed a church home. I could no longer opt out based upon previous experiences. Something was tugging at my soul to find a safe faith space in which to heal, grow, and stir up the spiritual gifts inside.
I needed to get to God and I couldn't get to Him alone.
A Facebook friend invited me to her church after I'd tried a few others that weren't quite right. Even I was shocked when it only took two visits to know it was the one for me. But I have some non-negotiables just as I do with relationships (a whole other article) that prepared me for the search. So, knowing what was right was just as simple as knowing what would not work for me.
I hope this list helps you to refine your search and get a little closer to finding a faith community that speaks to you in the new year (or maybe even sooner!):
1.Clarity Of Beliefs
Are the church's mission and principles clear? This should be one of the first things you consult to understand if how the church operates aligns with your values and speaks to your spirit. There should be a mission statement or statement of belief on their website, church bulletin board, or weekly programs, and it should be evident in their church culture. If access to this information is limited or nonexistent, it could be a sign of disorder and disarray - neither of which is a firm spiritual foundation.
2.Integrity Of Leadership
Does the teaching align with accurate interpretation of Scripture? If the pastor never consults the Textbook, there are no guardrails to keep him or her from preaching and teaching their own ideas, thoughts, and opinions instead of God's inspired word. This is dangerous. Vet your church leadership - their temperament, leadership style, and if how they lead/teach enables or stifles spiritual growth. Look for preaching and teaching replete with scriptural reference. This shows the leader's good stewardship of their office and helps in your own personal understanding, study, and devotion.
3.Freedom
Do the church members exercise their agency to be themselves? To grow at the pace of their walk with God? To hone their unique gifts and use their talents? Churches are not compounds of groupthink. If God was creative enough to FORM each of us individually, we do ourselves and the rest of the world a disservice to voluntarily put ourselves on an assembly line. A church that encourages individuality, creativity, and exploration of gifts and callings is a church seeking to operate effectively.
4.A Culture Of Service
Are there opportunities to grow in one's ministry of serving others? Does the church have (or is it open to beginning) a ministry for members who need assistance? The first church was committed (as directed by Jesus) to caring for one another and their greater community. Where selflessness is absent, selfishness, jealousy, and infighting are rampant. Show me a church culture with a flourishing service ministry and I'll show you a church where selfishness won't win, even if it does rear its ugly head from time to time.
5.Welcoming Spirit
Are members and leaders welcoming you into the space? Do they smile and seem happy to be present? It seems like a no-brainer but it's worth stating that if the church members or leaders don't speak to you and you're unsure of where to go or what to do it may not be someplace you'll want to put down roots.
6.Growth
Is the church growing? Are members excited to tell others about their church? Does the community have good things to say? If the church was founded in 1999 and there are only 20 members in 2018, that's a red flag. People should be on assignment, creating, learning, growing, and exercising their gifts. This naturally leads to growth. A church whose members only come to a service and go home is a sign of a church that is either dead or dying. It doesn't have to be a mega-church but there should be growth. There should be movement. There should be at least locally widespread good news about that faith space's presence in the community.
The search is a sacred, intimate one. If you don't feel led to join a particular church, don't let anyone talk you into it. Wait for your heart and mind to agree. When you're sure, don't let anyone talk you out of it. The journey of evolution that awaits on the other side is a beautiful one.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here to receive our latest articles and news straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Getty Images
Originally published on December 16, 2018
- How to Find a Church: 7 Things to Look for - FaithGateway ›
- How to Find Your New Church Home After a Move | Bekins ›
- When Is It Time to Find a New Church? - RELEVANT Magazine ›
- Looking for the 'Right' Church? | Focus on the Family ›
- 5 Tips for Finding a New Church - RELEVANT Magazine ›
- How Do I Find the Right Church? | Focus on the Family ›
- How to Find a Church That's a Good Fit for You ›
- What should I look for when choosing a new church home? ›
RELATED
Chase is an LA resident who wanted to use her platform to give back to firefighters in a big way. "I don't think that firefighters are paid anywhere near enough for what they do because I know I couldn't do something like that. I wouldn't even know where to start," Chase tells us.
"I admire them and how brave they are to even do the job that they do. And then also, LA just needs a better system in place to prevent things like this [from] happening, obviously. So it was just important to me, and I'm thankful that I have the platform to do so. So it was just important to me to give back in any way that I could and make a positive out of this really negative situation."
Anela's Vintage (Anela is Chase's middle name) is a vintage store that was influenced by the iconic Y2K era. While anyone can shop on the site, it's also a go-to spot for stylists who want to pull items for video shoots, award shows, and more.
The boutique is also a full-circle moment as T-Boz once had a children's fashion boutique named after Chase. The "No Scrubs" singer opens up about how proud she is of her daughter using her talents in a positive way.
"I think giving back to the fires is amazing because a lot of things that I do, I usually incorporate sickle cell," says T-Boz. "So the fact that she's giving back and it's coming through something that people love to do anyway, which is shop, you can't get better than that. And then you're helping people in the process, that's the perfect kind of event to me."
Since Chase followed in her mother's footsteps by getting into fashion, can we expect the same with music? "I mean, I can sing, but it's not the path I really chose," Chase says.
"Music is a huge part of my life. I love music a lot, and I'm honestly really good at things involving music. I don't know why I've never chose to do it as a career, to be honest, but at this very moment, no."
If Chase ever gets into music, T-Boz thinks she would make a great A&R executive because she has a good ear for music. When it comes to their mother-daughter dynamic, the "Girl Talk" artist jokingly says that Chase thinks she's the mother in their relationship and always tells her what to do. However, she admits that she has helped her embrace saying no to people who ask to borrow money.
Tron Austin, Rozonda Thomas, Chase Anela Rolison, and Tionne Watkins attend the CrazySexyCool Premiere Event at AMC Loews Lincoln Square 13 theater on October 15, 2013 in New York City.
Photo by Brad Barket/Getty Images for VH1
"I'm sucker free Sunday in the department of when people are sick, or say they sick, some of them be lying," T-Boz says. "But, you know, like, I have a soft spot there--"So I have said no all last year, at the end of the year, and all this year, even though we're in the beginning, I still said no."
The multi-platinum artist reveals she recently moved to Tennessee and is looking forward to writing with country artists. She also wants to get into producing films and is currently working on a TLC Broadway play. "It's not going to be typical, like behind the music and all that. It'll be more like the strength and triumph of three females and probably through the islands of the lyrics of our songs, if that makes sense," T-Boz explains.
"So I think it'll be done differently. It's time consuming. This is the third year we've been working on it, but it actually will hit Broadway next year, and I'm nervous about that. Like, she gets nervous. I get nervous."
The next steps for Chase include growing Anela Vintage and having a storefront. The pop-up shop will be held Sunday, January 26th, at 2520 Sunset Blvd, Los Angeles, CA, from 3- 9 PM.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature images by David Livingston/Getty Images, @chaserolison/ Instagram