

Whew. OK. I'm already gonna tell y'all that some of you have men who are gonna shut this entire conversation down, the very moment that you dare to bring it up. The reason why is because, there are some guys who struggle with anything that has to do with their anal region being toyed with (even though they'll find a way to be all up in ours, if/when we let them) — and that's kind of unfortunate.
The reason why I say that is because, when it comes to them experiencing an orgasm that is truly on a whole 'nother level, giving their prostate some attention is going to be required.
Prostate Milking: A Guide To Mind-Blowing Orgasms
As a lot of us learned in anatomy class, the prostate is a walnut-sized gland that is located below your bladder and right in front of your rectum, although it should go on record that a woman's prostate is typically referred to as the Skene's glands (they're what help to lubricate your urethra, produce antimicrobial substances to prevent UTIs and secrete mucus-containing fluids to your genital region so that sexual intercourse is more pleasurable).
For men, the prostate produces fluid that supports and transports sperm and semen. For both men and women, at the end of the day, the prostate is where our G-spot is housed. And you know what that means, right? #wink
Now that we've gotten the science of the prostate out of the way, let's touch on what it means to milk it, why every man should be open to trying it (at least once), and how you should go about doing it. Take a deep breath. Ready?
What Is Prostate Milking?
Something tells me that some of you were already able to figure out what prostate milking was, just from the intro alone.
The bottom line is prostate milking is what happens when you intentionally massage a man's prostate gland until some milky fluid is produced from that particular part of his body. Back in the day (the 19th century), physicians used to do it in order to treat an inflamed prostate. These days, it's seen as a way to encourage men to have a more pleasurable sexual experience.
Something that's pretty fascinating about prostate milking is, just like men can ejaculate and not have an orgasm (it's amazing how many men and women don't seem to know this), there is actually a difference between prostate fluid and semen as well. See, when a man ejaculates, what he's releasing is a combination of sperm, prostate fluid and other fluid that helps to serve as a lubricant (it can help to neutralize your vagina's acidic levels).
On the other hand, prostate milking simply releases the fluids that are housed within his prostate. This is important to keep in mind because 1) prostate milking isn't the same as ejaculate and 2) not all men ejaculate during the prostate milking process. Truth be told, not all of them have an orgasm with the milking process either, especially when they are first trying it out; however, prostate milking certainly ups the ante of them having a really powerful one which brings me to my next point.
Why Does Every Man Need Prostate Milking?
OK, so why does every man need to experience prostate milking, at least once in their life? Again, for an unbelievable orgasm! And here's why. Did you know that approximately 1 in 4 men fake orgasms? Did you also know that only 10 percent of men in their 20s and seven percent of men in their 30s and over never experience multiple orgasms? So yes, while men do typically orgasm more than we do, that doesn't mean that they couldn't stand to have more and better ones and possibly even a few multiples along the way.
Prostate milking helps to make that possible.
Prostate Milking: How Do You Actually Do It?
So, what if you're super curious about prostate milking and you're somehow actually able to convince your partner to give it a shot? How do you go about doing it? Good question.
First, take a shower together. Oftentimes, knowing that there won't be any, well, surprises down there can ease the stress/tension/overthinking for both you and your partner. It can also make you both more relaxed and put you into a sensual mood.
Create the right ambiance. If this is your partner's first time, they're not going to want to feel like they are experiencing a routine prostate exam. Dim the lights. Play some nice music. Light a scented soy candle. Toss back a couple of drinks. Even have some light conversation to get their mind off of things. Because there continues to be such a stigma with anal pleasure when it comes to straight men, you need to help him to loosen up.
Have some lube nearby. Lube makes things wetter and easier which always makes things better in the long run — for all parties involved.
Encourage him to get into a position that he's comfortable in. For a lot of men, this is while they are on their side with a pillow in between their legs. Being on their back with their legs propped up can sometimes cause them to feel incredibly self-conscious. Either way, encourage him to do whatever feels the least uncomfortable.
Prepare for light insertion. With lube generously applied to his anal area and your finger (watch those nails), gently caress his anus. As his sphincter begins to relax, try inserting the tip of your finger. Then make it go into small circles, slightly pulling back and then re-entering, only as your partner becomes more comfortable with you doing so.
Pay attention to when you've hit your "mark". And just how will you know when you've gone deep enough? His prostate should be no more than 2-3" inside of his anus. One way to get his mind off of the fact that you are going further in is to either manually stimulate his penis or to get him into a position where you can massage his prostate and perform fellatio at the same time.
Once you feel "the walnut", stop stimulating his penis and become more intentional about massaging his prostate. One of the most effective ways to do it is by signaling "come here" with your index finger, again, ever so gently. If you continue to do this while kissing or dirty talking, it can send waves throughout him that will culminate in a very intense orgasm — sometimes multiple ones — and quite a bit of prostate fluid and, at the end, ejaculate.
Some say that it can be double the amount of ejaculate that a man normally has, so definitely be prepared for that. He might pull a Marcus (from Boomerang when he got turned out by Jacqueline), so definitely be prepared for that too. #doublewink
So, there you have it. Like I said in the beginning, it's kind of an acquired taste yet it would be a shame if your partner missed out on some really excellent sexual stimulation simply because prostate milking was never introduced into the conversation. So, why not bring it up? The worst he can say is "no". Oh, but if he's down…it could be somewhat life-changing. And how dope is that?
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'Sistas' Star Skyh Black On The Power Of Hypnotherapy & Emotional Vulnerability For Men
In this insightful episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Sistas star Skyh Black, as he opened up about his journey of emotional growth, resilience, and self-discovery. The episode touches on emotional availability, self-worth, masculinity, and the importance of therapy in overcoming personal struggles.
Skyh Black on Emotional Availability & Love
On Emotional Availability & Vulnerability
“My wife and I wouldn't be where we are today if both of us weren't emotionally available,” he shared about his wife and Sistas co-star KJ Smith, highlighting the value of vulnerability and emotional openness in a relationship. His approach to masculinity stands in contrast to the traditional, stoic ideals. Skyh is not afraid to embrace softness as part of his emotional expression.
On Overcoming Self-Doubt & Worthiness Issues
Skyh reflected on the self-doubt and worthiness issues that he struggled with, especially early in his career. He opens up about his time in Los Angeles, living what he calls the “LA struggle story”—in a one-bedroom with three roommates—and being homeless three times over the span of 16 years. “I always had this self-sabotaging thought process,” Skyh said. “For me, I feel therapy is essential, period. I have a regular therapist and I go to a hypnotherapist.”
How Therapy Helped Him Heal From Self-Doubt
On Hypnotherapy & Empowering Self-Acceptance
Skyh’s journey is a testament to the power of tapping into self-development despite life’s struggles and being open to growth. “I had to submit to the fact that God was doing good in my life, and that I'm worthy of it. I had a worthiness issue and I did not realize that. So, that’s what the hypnotherapy did. It brought me back to the core. What is wrong so that I can fix it?”
Watch the full podcast episode below:
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Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
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