I Went From 'Skin Goals' To Adult Acne, Here's How I Bounced Back
Not to toot my own horn, but 90% of the time, my skin is flawless. My most recent revelation of this? Being featured by a popular site in a video segment and the entire comment section asking, "Green sweater, what's your skincare regimen?" They completely ignored the takeaways of self-love and wellness that I shared with them. My point? Outside of that time of the month, my skin hardly ever fails me unless I'm suffering from intense anxiety.
The last time I recall having breakouts, was during finals in my first semester of grad school. I woke up, and the right side of my face was covered in acne. Nothing helped until after exams were finished, and weeks later, all of the acne disappeared.
COVID-19 has impacted my life, and my skin, and unlike the weeks of discomfort that I endured last winter, the highs and lows of my skin breaking out have lasted for months this time and I needed answers. Due to the dermatologist offices being closed in quarantine, I had to get creative and explore alternative methods of getting my skincare game, and life together.
If the Rona is messing with your skin, explore these options to bring it back to life.
Evaluate your skincare routine pre-pandemic.
Prior to the pandemic, my skincare routine included sunlight, additional water intake due to cycling workouts, and swimming three times a week followed by the sauna, a place where my skin was nurtured with heat and jojoba oil. If I'm lucky, these days I get outside 1-2 hours a day and that can't compare to the environment my skin was used to. Additionally, your skin feels the pandemic's stress, and when our bodies feel that pressure, it releases cortisol.
When this occurs, it lowers the estrogen production, which can lead to a spike in androgen levels. And as androgen plays a role in connecting with the sebaceous glands when they feel stressed, those glands overproduce oil. That oil clogs our pores and leads to inflammation that causes breakouts - it's a never-ending cycle of stress that shows up on your skin. Consider what products you used to use to show your skin a little extra love previously, and do more of that to see change.
When complying with PPE rules, find a face mask that doesn't irritate your skin.
For weeks, I'd seen adult acne form the corners of where I place my face mask on daily when I work out, and even though I didn't pop the pimples, they left dark marks (as most acne scars become due to melanated skin.) Weeks into quarantine, after realizing that washing my sheets weekly versus. bi-weekly hadn't helped, all roads pointed to my mask, so I opted to work out in an area where I'd hardly ever come in contact with anyone, without a mask - versus the park, where I'd work out in days prior to. Unfortunately, some instances of "maskne" aren't avoidable, for more info on how to avoid mask-related breakouts, check out "8 Tips to Prevent Acne Caused by Face Masks".
I increased my water intake.
While I only drink water and coffee daily, I still have to admit that social distancing hours will pass and I'll forget to take a sip. And due to sitting at my desk most of the time, working for hours on end forgetting to do basic things such as stretch, and take adequate water breaks, my skin was impacted. Intentionally stopping to drink water in intervals daily has helped me hold myself, and my urine color accountable. My skin has also flourished because of it.
Steam your skin (I repeat steam your skin).
About two months into being met with skincare woes, I decided that I'd call in for skin reinforcements in the form of re-upping on my favorite products and steaming. Steaming your skin by way of a steamer, a pot of boiling water and a towel, or a sauna helps to unclog your pores. I have access to a sauna and I've noticed that the weeks I steam and go visit the spa, my skin recuperates and glows more as a result.
Detox.
If you're like me, the first few weeks of quarantine were filled with snacks and Netflix. And while that escape from reality felt good initially, our bodies and skin are asking for a detox when acne shows up on our faces. Consider a cleanse with a natural detox tea, green juice, or supplement with adding probiotics, and leafy greens to your diet to improve the clarity of your complexion.
Shop Yasmine's Skincare Finds:
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Featured image via Yasmine Jameelah/Instagram
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Dubbed one of the "21 Black Women Wellness Influencers You Should Follow" by Black + Well, Yasmine Jameelah continues to leave her digital footprint across platforms ranging from Forever 21 Plus, Vaseline, and R29 Unbothered discussing all things healing and body positivity. As a journalist, her writing can be found on sites such as Blavity, Blacklove.com, and xoNecole. Jameelah is also known for her work shattering unconventional stigmas surrounding wellness through her various mediums, including her company Transparent Black Girl. Find Yasmine @YasmineJameelah across all platforms.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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'Love Is Blind' Star AD Smith Shows Us That The Journey To Self-Worth Is Ongoing And She Shouldn't Be Criticized For It
This season of Love Is Blind was undeniably a rollercoaster ride of emotions. From intricate love triangles to deeply rooted attachment issues, it offered viewers a compelling glimpse into the complexities of modern relationships.
Yet, amidst the drama and romance, I think it serves as a poignant reminder of how we can possess a keen awareness of our relationship patterns; we can even find ourselves in therapy for years yet find ourselves repeatedly entangled in the same destructive cycles. Without the necessary tools and strategies to dismantle old habits and embrace healthier alternatives, we are destined to remain ensnared in a cycle of repetition and stagnation.
Amber Desiree “AD” Smith was left shocked and confused at the altar when her fiancé, Clay Gravesande, ultimately decided not to go through with the wedding ceremony. His actions throughout the season consistently indicated hesitancy towards commitment despite initially expressing readiness for a long-term relationship when he and AD first connected in the pods.
Throughout the season, Clay's journey revealed layers of immaturity stemming from childhood wounds caused by generational trauma, along with a clear unpreparedness for a healthy relationship. His relationship with AD began on shaky ground when he hesitated to commit without knowing her appearance first.
@netflix.reality.clips Clay and AD in the pods #clayloveisblind #ADloveisblind #loveisblindseason6 #libs6 #dating show
Despite AD's initial surprise, she decided to give Clay a chance, continuing their relationship. However, this initial compromise led to recurring issues, such as Clay's insensitive comments about potential weight gain and his insistence that AD join a gym if she were to gain weight in the future.
Despite these challenges, Clay and AD left the pods engaged with a road ahead of them of ongoing struggles in the real world. Clay and AD's relationship seemed shallow, mainly revolving around superficial interactions reminiscent of casual social media banter. Clay's fixation on physical appearance and fear of commitment clashed with AD's idealized vision of their relationship, blinding her from facing the reality of who Clay truly was.
Clay often centered conversations around himself, indicating a deep need for validation, which AD eagerly provided. From my point of view, this mutual reinforcement bolstered Clay's ego while fulfilling AD's need for validation in return.
Throughout season 6, Clay grappled with committing to a single partner, influenced by his upbringing witnessing his father's multiple relationships and extramarital affairs. The absence of healthy marriage examples shaped his perception of relationships. Despite these challenges, AD remained steadfast in her support, demonstrating a willingness to confront and overcome obstacles with Clay, given her upbringing in a household where her father was absent, an attachment wound that she has gained awareness about in therapy.
In the season finale, AD's excitement turned to confusion when Clay unexpectedly responded with "I don't" after her "I do." Clay's decision wasn't about AD's worth but stemmed from his own lack of emotional maturity and focus on superficial traits like physical appearance and achievement.
@stephmoneymonster Justice for AD #loveisblind #loveisblindseason6 #fpy #viralvideo #foryoupage #single #dating
Despite Clay's repeated expressions of self-doubt throughout the season, AD was visibly taken aback, holding onto the hope that he would change. AD's desire to be with Clay overshadowed her ability to discern if he was the right guy for her. Throughout the season, she found herself caught up in a fantasy of who she wanted Clay to be and the idea of being married to him. Clay's repeated statements about how AD made him a better man and how he wanted to change for her likely boosted her ego.
Many of us can relate to AD's struggle; grappling with feelings of unworthiness due to childhood trauma and abandonment often traps us in cycles that reinforce our deepest fears.
At the altar, AD was left devastated, questioning her worthiness and desirability. However, it’s not that AD isn’t worthy; she’s just stuck in a pattern of choosing emotionally unavailable partners, reminiscent of her father. Though she desires a different outcome, she finds herself unable to connect with a man who is emotionally present, reflecting her own emotional unavailability.
In our society, there's a common expectation for women to take on the role of nurturing and guiding men, often justified by the belief that “boys will be boys.” Like most women, AD frequently excuses Clay's behavior and does much of the emotional work in their relationship.
Deep down, AD likely felt the need to show unwavering support to Clay, hoping to secure his commitment by accommodating his flaws. For AD, love has become synonymous with earning someone's affection, a belief she reinforced by investing her heart in Clay, hoping to prove her worth to him. Yet, in doing so, she unwittingly perpetuated her own cycle of dysfunction.
AD's journey highlights the importance of being discerning in relationships, distinguishing between genuine compatibility, and settling for something less (the "right" from the "kinda sorta right"). Unfortunately, she lacked the tools to see Clay clearly, especially when dealing with her own attachment issues. Relying solely on physical attraction can be risky, as it often leads to repeating old patterns, with judgment clouded by the intensity of emotions.
Netflix Love Is Blind season 6 Clay and AD/ Screenshot
Engaging in inner work through therapy is undoubtedly a crucial step toward personal growth and healing, but it doesn’t fix us. It provides us with the opportunity to delve into our past traumas, confront deep-seated insecurities, and develop healthier coping mechanisms. However, despite the insights gained and the progress made within the therapeutic setting, applying this newfound self-awareness to real-life situations, especially in the realm of romantic relationships, can be challenging.
For someone like AD, the journey towards self-discovery is ongoing. I love the way Yung Pueblo puts it: “If the pain was deep, you will have to let it go many times.” While therapy equips her with valuable tools for introspection and self-reflection, it doesn't necessarily guarantee an immediate transformation in her dating behavior or decision-making process because she needs to grieve what she didn’t get from her father and create a new identity for herself.
One of the biggest reasons for this disparity between inner work and practical application lies in the complexity of human emotions and behavior.
Despite understanding the root causes of her attachment issues, AD found herself still drawn to partners who perpetuate these dynamics. This phenomenon often occurs because our emotional responses are deeply ingrained and may override rational thought processes, particularly when it pertains to matters of the heart.
'Love Is Blind' Season 6 Finale AD and Clay's Wedding/ Screenshot
Furthermore, the dynamics of therapy sessions differ vastly from real-life interactions and relationships. In therapy, individuals are in a controlled environment where they can explore their thoughts and emotions without fear of judgment. However, the unpredictability and vulnerability inherent in dating can trigger old wounds and defense mechanisms, making it challenging to maintain the same level of self-awareness and emotional regulation.
Moreover, societal expectations and cultural norms can exert significant pressure on individuals like AD, influencing their perceptions of what constitutes a successful relationship. The desire for validation, societal approval, or the fear of being alone may cloud judgment and lead to compromising on core values or overlooking red flags.
So, how can we bridge the gap between inner work and practical application in our own dating lives?
Firstly, it's essential to acknowledge that growth is a gradual process and setbacks are inevitable. Instead of expecting instant results, we can practice self-compassion and patience while holding ourselves accountable.
Additionally, we can also work on slowing down, setting boundaries, and practicing assertiveness in our interactions with potential partners. Start getting to know people from the inside out. Not just by what they say but by what they do. These two things should always walk hand in hand.
By clearly communicating our needs and values and slowing down on physical intimacy, we can better discern whether a relationship aligns with our values.
Furthermore, seeking support from wise counsel (trusted friends and family), mentors, or even continuing therapy BEFORE things get too serious can provide us with additional perspectives and guidance as we navigate the dating landscape. Having a support network can offer reassurance and validation while also providing accountability in making healthy choices.
Lastly, by staying attuned to our emotions and paying attention to what our intuition is saying, we can make more informed decisions and avoid falling into familiar traps.
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Feature image Netflix Love Is Blind Season 6/ Screenshot