Aunjanue Ellis has exemplified Black girl magic in her roles for Lovecraft Country and more recently King Richard. And with so much buzz surrounding the Oscar-nominated actress for her incredible work, her sexuality never became a topic.
That didn’t mean that Aunjanue was hiding it. For example, she wore a stunning head-to-toe red suit with the words “Queer” embellished down her blazer’s sleeve while attending the 15th Annual Essence Black Women in Hollywood Awards. Kicking off Pride month, the Mississippi native spoke with Variety about the outfit she wore to the Essence event and her bisexuality. “I was thinking, ‘Why didn’t more people pay attention to that?’ And I was like, they probably thought it said ‘Queen,’” she said about wearing the words “Queer” on her suit.
“It wasn’t that I was expecting any sort of major reaction or anything like that. One of my family members noticed, but nobody else did.” Her friends and family already knew about her sexual identity. However, they didn’t expect her to share it with the world. According to Aunjanue, they were “hurt” by her decision.
“I am a work in progress, and my family and my community are works in progress,” she said. “I really believe that that is important to say because I’m not alone. We see people on the other side of it, where everybody’s good and fine: ‘Love is love.’”
Navigating Hollywood as a bisexual woman has been quite an experience for the 53-year-old. She shared that many Black women have made damaging comments about queerness not recognizing that Aunjanue is a queer woman. “There is an assumption made of me — a presumption made of me,” she said. “Is it because I’m a Black woman from Mississippi? Is it because I’m older? I don’t know what the mechanics are that goes into them not processing, or them not just being able to believe that in the same way I am Black, I am queer. This is who I am.”
The When They See Us actress recalled a moment she revealed her sexuality to her co-workers after a couple of them expressed their concern exploring a character’s bisexuality.
“This person that I was working with had a tremendous amount of anxiety about exploring that part of that character’s life,” she remembered. “I’m sitting here feeling like there’s something perverse about this woman because she’s bi, and we don’t want to talk about it, as if something is wrong with her.”
(L-R) Honorees Nia Long, Quinta Brunson, Chanté Adams, and Aunjanue Ellis during the 2022 15th Annual ESSENCE Black Women In Hollywood Awards Luncheon.
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Aunjanue also shared that another co-worker complained to her about having to kiss a woman in a scene which was upsetting to the actress. “The way she talked about it, it was almost like she was disgusted by it,” she said. “And I was just like, ‘What do I do here?’”
She ended up sending a mass text to everyone to address the matter.
“I was like, ‘Look, I love y’all. I appreciate my relationships and friendships, working and otherwise with all of you, but you need to know that I am bisexual,’” she said. “So when you say things, when you have felt your most intimate with me, that are queer-phobic, you are talking about me. And it hurts.’”
She continued, “It doesn’t even register with them that it happens, because it’s so hetero-normative. We think that we’re on the other side of things because of what we see in media and on television and we are so not.”
“I think that’s one of the reasons why I started wearing that (Girl Bi) sweatshirt. And that’s one of the things that made me put ‘Queer’ on my sleeve that day.”
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The Libra woman is looking for her equal in love, someone who is willing to put in the same effort she is, and the Aries man sees Libra as someone he is willing to do that with.
The Love Compatibility Of A Libra Woman And An Aries Man
What attracts a Libra woman and an Aries man to each other?
There is a magnet of attraction pulling these two together, and things tend to move pretty fast in this relationship. The Libra woman is always open to love and her charming nature rarely has any challenges here. The Aries man fights for his independence and doesn’t sacrifice that unless he is completely enamored with someone.
Once the Aries man catches the eye of the Libra woman, he is typically the one to make the first move and this instantly wins the approval of Libra.
These two feel like they have known each other forever when they meet, and this spark between them doesn’t die down easily.
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What is the relationship like between a Libra woman and an Aries man?
The relationship between the Libra woman and the Aries man is one of balance and excitement. The Aries man tends to take on the more dominant role in this relationship and the Libra woman tends to be the more receptive one. Aries is ruled by masculine Mars, and Libra is ruled by feminine Venus. They understand they are coming from two completely different worlds, yet they also instinctively feel this underlying connection to each other and like they could be something each other needs in their lives.
The Libra woman can rely on the Aries man, and the Aries man never has to ask for the love that Libra already knows he needs.
This is a couple that is often reading each other’s minds and wanting to do a lot of the same things. However, not everything is rainbow in this relationship as well, and there are some major differences they have to overcome to make things work. One argument can lead to an explosion between these two, and addressing things when they come up rather than sweeping them under the rug, will be needed to make this relationship long-term.
What is the sex like between a Libra woman and an Aries man?
The sex between a Libra woman and an Aries man is adventurous. These are two cardinal signs with plenty of energy and stamina to keep things exciting in the bedroom. There tends to be a good give and take in this relationship, and their yin and yang energy benefits them when it comes to their sex life.
There is electricity felt between the two of them in this area of their life, and their power of attraction to each other is strong. These are two people who will want to do a lot of things together, including exploring sexually together.
The Aries man will have to be careful with being overly aggressive, however, as the soft Libra woman may not like this energy- it will completely depend on the two individuals at hand. The Libra woman wants to ease into things, the Aries man wants to get going right away. Learning about each other's bodies, and energy, and reading each other’s cues will help with this.
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What makes a relationship between a Libra woman and an Aries man work?
These two genuinely like each other, and that basis is a key factor for success in any relationship. The Aries man is straight to the point, direct, and inspired. The Libra woman admires these characteristics in others, as she is often herself finding her balance in this type of energy as well. Neither sign is overly emotional in a way that turns them off, and they both require a lot of the same things in a committed relationship. They want honesty, fun, good communication, passion, and to be moving towards a common goal together.
The Libra woman and Aries man don’t have a problem being real with each other and this is something they really value within the relationship. They are both very charming, and there is plenty of flirtation and attraction to keep this relationship going. Aries being the protector they are, Libra finds a sense of safety and ease in this energy, and like they have found their match. Overall, this is a well-balanced relationship and one where they don’t have a problem when it comes to compatibility or chemistry in the relationship.
What may cause a Libra woman and an Aries man to break up?
Libra is the lover, Aries is the fighter, and this energy may be tiring for the both of them after time. The Libra woman can be passive to a fault, and the Aries man who is not evolved, may take advantage of that. She will need to be careful with putting Aries’ needs above her own, creating resentment later down the road. The Aries man loves a challenge, and the Libra woman would be up for that game for a little bit, but if she is not being met in the middle, she will begin to look for other places. These two can have a difficult time keeping the peace in the relationship, and there could be a lot of arguments and disagreements here if they both aren’t willing to put their egos or self-pleasing attitudes to the side.
The Libra woman and Aries man are both more sensitive than they appear or come off as. They are also not necessarily the type to dive deep into their emotions and express them to others, even in their relationships. However, this energy can keep the relationship to a surface level than what is needed to progress and grow the relationship, and a sense of openness is required for this couple to work. Libra needs romance, she wants to be wowed. Aries needs to remember this and to always consider her love language.
Summary
Overall, this is a successful pairing. They will have their fair share of challenges in the relationship, but nothing they can’t overcome if they are willing to. The trouble will come in when it comes to the longevity of the relationship, keeping Aries excited and Libra in love. However, all in all, there is more power, attraction, and love to keep this relationship together rather than apart. No relationship is perfect, but this one is a little more blessed than most.
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