![Quantcast](http://pixel.quantserve.com/pixel/p-GS-HF4BKvzCmv.gif)
![Feelin' It: 6 Things To Know As A 'Friend Empath'](https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy81MjEyNTk0My9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTcyNTUxODgxOH0.Z0JqZdJ72wH6FANGp9MRR4h42zjvR-P-qjn5tqKIiMY/img.jpg?width=1200&height=600&quality=90&coordinates=0%2C0%2C0%2C378)
Feelin' It: 6 Things To Know As A 'Friend Empath'
Back when I was in the process of getting my letters in life coaching, something that I spent a good amount of time on is empaths. When it comes to words that are used in the mental health space, it’s kind of interesting that there are two things that I, surprisingly, find narcissists and empaths to have in common.
For one thing, while many people have narcissistic and empath-related traits, far less folks are actually narcissists (meaning they havethe disorder) or are full-on empaths. And two, oftentimes, those two types of people are actuallydrawn to one another. While it’s kind of another article for another time how/why, for the sake of this article, empaths tend to want to help narcissists, and narcissists like to take that help for granted to the nth degree. That’s actually how a lot of folks with narcissistic tendencies and individuals with empathic traits end up being friends…or rather “friends.”
So, is that what we’re gonna talk about today? Eh. Not specifically. This is more about the fact that, as we get older and live and learn a little longer, you start to realize that “friend” is not a simple word and oftentimes we can struggle in our relationships with people because we don’t know enough about ourselves (and/or others) to figure out how to keep the connection healthy and mutually beneficial. An example of that is if you are indeed an empath and you’re trying to navigate through your relationships with people who aren’t or even…are.
Let’s explore that today. If you’re someone who has always wondered why you sometimes have challenges in your friendships that others do not seem to, it might just be that you’re what I call a “friend empath.” Read on to see if that is indeed the case.
Being An Empath. Revisited.
Before getting into what it means to be an empath, let me just say that back when I discovered that I was an ambivert and I started to share the signs of one with other people, it was funny how so many folks who had never even heard of the word before suddenly said, “Yeah, I’m one too then.” Umm, that’s not exactly how it works. LOL. If you really want to discover things like that about yourself, it’s always a good idea to take an actual test. So, if you’re curious to know if you are a true empath (and not just someone who has some of the characteristics because most of us fall under that category), you can take a free testhere,here, andhere (you can also get an “official” assessment with a reputable mental health provider).
And what exactly is an empath? Probably one of the easiest and simplest ways to explain it isan empath is someone who is able to sense, feel, and understand what others do in a way that is very profound. A fictional character who immediately comes to mind isMay from the movie A Secret Life of Bees. If you saw the movie, you might recall that she would write her feelings down on a piece of paper, put them into a stone wall, and grieve. She did this so much to the point that one day, she couldn’t take the burdens of her feelings any longer, and she took her own life.
Being an empath definitely doesn’t mean that life has to be that heavy or grim; however, a common trait for pretty much all empaths is they are very sensitive, and that can make discourse in friendships and also the ending of friendships so much harder for them to deal with than anyone else.
For an empath, it’s almost like they take on the life of their friends and, should things come to an end, the heartbreak of it all, on some level, can seem to last for years — if not, on some level, forever. That’s oftentimes why many empaths prefer to only deal intimately with very few people; it’s literally all that their heart can take.
If all of what I just said actually resonates with you, yet you want to know some telling signs that you could very well be a friend empath (or one of your friends is a friend empath), here are six traits to pay very close attention to.
6 Telling Signs You Are A Friend Empath
1. You Tend to “Absorb” Other People’s Emotions
If you’re a Christian and you’ve never taken a spiritual gifts test before (I Corinthians 12), I recommend that you do (a pretty thorough one can be accessedhere). Long story short, it helps you to understand some of the supernatural abilities that you have that help to edify the Church. The way that most people who specialize in spiritual gifts say that you should really focus on the results is the top three high scores (even if they are five or six different things); those are what you are the strongest in.
Anyway, if one of them happens to be faith, think about how you handle a lot of bad news or a ton of intel about a person or situation. If you prefer to limit your participation, you also may be an empath and not even know it. How did I come to that conclusion? It’s because I know several people with that gift, and all of them say that when they receive too much information, it weighs down their spirit, affects their ability to pray, and can even make them very sad. I think a big part of it is because in order to have faith, you’ve got to believe in things, and in order to believe, you oftentimes need to have some level of sympathy, compassion, and empathy — and if you get too involved, at the very least, it can become emotionally overwhelming to the point that what other people have going on could very well consume you.
With all this being said, think about when your friends call to vent something. Are you present for the call and then when you hang up, it’s easy for you to go on about your day — or does it affect you to the point where you feel stressed out on some level? Almost as if you are now going through the experience with them — or, on some level, even “for” them?
2. You Typically Get Your Feelings Hurt Rather Easily
I have a few bona fide empaths in my life, and in order to be a better friend to them, something that I’ve had to learn to do is be more sensitive to their feelings because, sometimes, they can almost come across as being super fragile. It makes sense because, on the heels of what I just said about how empaths take on other people’s emotions, there’s no way that they would be able to do that if they didn’t feel things very intensely within themselves, too.
For instance, something that I have to do with empaths is be more cognizant of my delivery and tone because they are almost hypersensitive to both.
For a true empath, the saying, “It’s not what you say but how you say it,” definitely resonates because when you’re in the process of communicating with them, it’s almost like all five of their senses (touch, taste, hearing, sound, sight) are involved. This means that if your body language seems off, they are going to notice. If you raise your voice to make a point, they might feel low-key attacked. If you say something flippantly because you’re irritated, they may take it up a few more notches and assume that you are angry.
Can all of this boil down to sometimes feeling like you’re walking on eggshells when you’re dealing with an empath? Quite frankly, yes. However, what makes it worth your while is the fact that the level of sensitivity that an empath will bring to you in your time of experiencing say, a death or a break-up, is incomparable. They aren’t casual or nonchalant by any stretch. They see your pain, feel your pain, and want to be very mindful and present with you in it.
And so, if getting that means that you have to be a little extra cautious with their feelings sometimes…so be it (although empaths, it’s also wise to let people know when you’re feeling a little “tender;” it’s not fair to expect others to assume since not everyone is an empath like you are).
3. You Are Prone to Do Most of the Giving
Now, if there is one thing that I can totally relate with a true empath on is doing most of the giving in relationships; at least, that’s how my world used to be back in the day. Because empaths are highly compassionate (which basically means that they see suffering and want to do all that they can to alleviate it), they have a tendency to go above and beyond to help others out. In fact, it’s pretty common for empaths to end up caring about and doing more for a person’s problems than the person themselves, whether the individual asked them to or not.
For empaths, they can’t see being any other way because if someone has a need, they are typically hyper-focused on meeting it.
Here's the real catcher: even if they are this way with friends who show reciprocity, they are almost always going to “outdo” them because empaths don’t always know balance. If one of their friends needs rent money, they might overlook their own bills to pay it. After a while, that can make their friends feel uncomfortable or even guilty because while they appreciate the empath’s efforts, that doesn’t mean that they think they should respond in the same over-the-top ways.
And don’t even get me started on the folks who take more than they give in the friendship. For them, empaths are like a walking ATM because they know that if anyone will take their sob stories to heart, their empathetic friend will — and if it means that the empath has to go without in order for their own needs to be met…so be it.
This brings me to something else about friend empaths: energy vampires will try to emotionally eat them alive.
4. Energy Vampires Are Drawn to You
Empaths are very sensitive to energy — not just when it comes to people, either. In fact, another trait that is pretty common for empaths, in general, is they like to spend time in nature because it has a way of calming, centering, and replenishing them (so if you are friends with an empath and you want to show them how much you appreciate them, planning some sort of get-together in nature is oftentimes a wise choice). And because energy means a lot to them, energy vampires are always on the hunt for them.
What exactly is an energy vampire? The simple way to explain them is they are the type of people who are extremely draining to be around; some might even go so far as to define them as being toxic individuals. Why? Because of the things that they do.
Energy vampires are known to not take accountability for their actions. Energy vampires will play the victim a lot. Energy vampires might act as if they like you to your face; however, behind your back, they are either jealous of or competing with you (whether you realize it or not). Energy vampires constantly need attention. Energy vampires are always in some sort of drama. Energy vampires make mountains out of molehills. Energy vampires bring you down.
And you know what? I’m pretty sure that after all of what I just said about empaths, you can get why these types of people like empaths because if anyone is going to have tolerance for their “extra-ness,” it’s going to be an empath. And that’s why empaths have to be intentional about setting boundaries with these types of individuals.
In fact, because energy vampires can be a bit of a weakness for empaths, they might have to be a little more extreme than others and avoid being friends with these types of people altogether since saying “no” isn’t typically their strong suit.
5. You Can “Ghost” Folks
Charge it to what I do for a living (communicate…A LOT), yet if there is one thing that irks me to absolutely no end, it’s ghosting. Personally, I find it to be selfish, cowardly, and relationally irresponsible. Folks in my world know that if you want a line to be drawn, oh so very clearly in the sand with me, get ghost.
Interestingly enough, this is a common characteristic for a lot of empaths — although it’s usually not for malicious reasons. Because they care on such a deep level, sometimes their own feelings for others can overwhelm them; when that happens, what they tend to do is retreat, oftentimes without saying anything at all.
If you read that and are nodding your head up and down, let me just say that while other empaths may give you an automatic pass on this, people like me will not. It’s so much more effective — even if it’s via a text, email, or voicemail — to convey that you’re feeling a certain way and need some time to yourself than to abandon the friendship altogether and then expect someone to be fine with that and to pick up, just where the two of you left off, later on (whenever that later may be because…who knows?).
Yeah, as much as empaths may feel other people, they aren’t always or necessarily the clearest communicators on the planet. That’s something that can make being friends or in a romantic relationship with one hella challenging (at times).
6. Intimacy May Overwhelm You Sometimes
Last one. At the end of the day, intimacy is simply experiencing some level of closeness with other individuals, whether it’s mental, emotional, spiritual, or sexual. And again, because empaths feel so deeply, intimacy might be an internal struggle sometimes.
For instance, while they might be ready and willing to hear all of your problems, it could feel like pulling teeth to get them to do the same. Why? Because it’s natural for empaths to take on other people’s stuff, yet they oftentimes are “afraid” of the vulnerability that comes from sharing their own feelings, thoughts, and needs with other people. Why? Because if someone disappoints them, an empath may wonder if they will fully recover from it — and so, rather than take the risk, they keep (certain) things bottled up inside.
This is actually one of the reasons why I think it’s a good idea for engaged couples to take certain personality tests before saying “I do.” Imagine being married to an empath, not knowing it, and after a really heavy conversation or a very intense and intimate sexual experience, out of nowhere, they clam up on you. If you don’t know more about your partner’s personality traits, it can come off as out-of-nowhere rejection; if you’re aware that they are an empath, some extra tolerance and understanding will be easier to extend.
___
Was this a lot? I mean, in many ways, empaths are a lot. Still, if you know more about how they think and move, if you are one, that can make it easier for you to express what you need to others, and if you have a friend who is one, that can make it easier for you to understand how to be a good (and lasting) friend to them.
Author Dean Koontz once said, “Being an empath is like seeing with the soul.” And so yes, being a friend empath can be a true blessing — so long as all parties involved know how to handle it with care.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Delmaine Donson/Getty Images
Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
These Newlyweds Found Love Thanks To A Friend Playing Matchmaker
How We Met is a series where xoNecole talks love and relationships with real-life couples. We learn how they met, how like turned into love, and how they make their love work.
Jason and Elise Robinson’s union is a reminder that kind people still get their happily ever after. The pair had their first date in October of 2021 and tied the knot on June 15, 2024. Both of them have dedicated their lives to celebrating and supporting Black culture so it was only fitting they get married in what's considered the Black Hollywood of America during the Juneteenth celebration weekend. From the florists to Elise and Jason's gown and suit designers to the table signage and so much more, everything was Black-owned. It's no wonder their love for Black culture was the jumping-off point for their love story.
When they met, Jason had just moved to Atlanta for a new job opportunity, and Elise was living happily in her career and had put dating on the backburner. But luckily, a mutual connection saw something in both of them and thanks to a yoga-themed baby shower and a chance text message, they found their forever. Check out their beautiful How We Met story below.
I’ll start with the easiest question. Can you both tell me a little bit about yourself and your background?
Elise: Sure, my name is Elise. I’m actually from Atlanta, GA – not a transplant. I grew up here and left right after college to pursue my career. Now I’ve been back going on eight years, and I’m in my early 40s.
Jason: And I’m Jason. I’m originally from Racine, Wisconsin. I went to school at Florida A&M University, so I am a rattler. I went back to the Midwest for a period of time, in Indianapolis. Now, I’ve been in the Atlanta area for a little over two and a half years.
Jason and Elise Robinson
Photo by FotosbyFola
Wow, that’s nice because Atlanta gets a bad rap when it comes to relationships. So you have to give us the deets. How did you two find each other?
Elise: So I work in TV and I was on-air for a number of years and then transitioned into being a producer and then a manager. As a producer, I’d always have guests on. And there was a woman who came on frequently named Rosalynn (@Rosalynndaniels, often referred to as The Black Martha Stewart), and we connected instantly. Anyway, she got pregnant right before COVID and invited me to a “modern-day yoga baby shower.” I came to support, but was also just curious about that theme.
I had an amazing time. And when it was over a few of us stuck around and convos got personal. She ended up asking me the infamous ‘Are you dating’ question. When I told her no, she decided to set me up. So I should tell you, in both of my only two serious relationships, I was set up – so I was like no.
But she pointed at her husband, who was folding up chairs, and said that another friend set her up with him. Sometimes, it takes people outside of us to see what we need. A few months later, she reached out and said she had family relocating and thought I’d really like him. So she gave him my number, and I reached out with a text. He responded with a call, and that night, we talked for about 2-3 hours. So that’s how we met. I was a little nervous because me and Rosalynn were starting a friendship, and here I was, talking to her family!
Jason: It was new for me too. Remember, I was new to the area, and I had heard so many “stories” about how people have been done wrong in the dating world. Whether it’s by theft or scamming (laughs). Plus, I had just got a new job and wanted to focus on that. But I did want to be able to date someone in a more personal way and see where it led. I felt like who better than someone who I trust to connect me. Rosalynn knows I’m private, about business life, and my personal life is important to me.
So let’s get into your courtship. What was your first date like?
Elise: We had our first convo on a Monday, and he asked me out the next day. I didn’t have any plans, but I still said no. I was just playing hard to get (laughs). But we were talking every day, and he told me he wanted to take me somewhere I’ve never been. And I’m like, you’re in my city! But he sends me three options, and sure enough, two of the places I hadn’t gone to. So, our first date was October 1, 2021, and somebody was 45 minutes late.
Now Jason, why were you 45 minutes late?
Elise: It was me – in my own city. I just got turned around, and the traffic was horrible. I kept calling him and giving him permission to leave. Full transparency: I probably wouldn’t have waited if the shoe was on the other foot. But this was my first sign of what I now know and love the most about him. It’s his patience. When I got there, I was frazzled and everything, but he was just super calm. It ended up being a great first date.
Jason: I remember just waiting and being concerned for her well-being. Because I know how traffic can be, especially when someone is rushing. I was just scrolling through my phone and looking through the menu. It was cool.
Elise and Jason Robinson
Courtesy
That’s beautiful. Now let’s talk about the “what are we” convo? Did you have one of those and if so, who initiated it and how was it?
Elise: I initiated it. Jason was dating me – and still does. But by this time, we had been on a number of dates. We were on our way to a winery, and we had a bit of a drive. So I decided to state my intention. We were just a few weeks in, but we were spending a lot of time together and we are people of a particular age. So I told him, I know Atlanta can be a Black man’s playground. There’s so many beautiful professional women here. But I’m dating with intention. I don’t want to kick it or hang with a good guy even though he’s not my person. I was done with all of that. So I’m “laying down the law” in my eyes, and he didn’t flinch. He let me finish and basically let me know we were on the same page. He was not trying to sow his royal oats.
Jason: Yeah, I was not trying to be Prince Akeem. But also, it was more so about setting a tone and goal for myself. My mama always told me to set my goals. And having a family was always one of mine. I think the biggest thing of it all, was I felt blessed – in terms of moving for work and meeting Elise, now being married. There’s victories being placed in my life.
I love that you both shared that because sometimes I get feedback on these stories and it seems like sometimes we’re afraid to really voice what we desire, no matter what that looks like.
Elise: Yeah, I think sometimes women feel like they don’t want to put pressure on their partner. But it’s not pressure. Look, Jason and I are based in faith, and what is for us is for us. Being upfront and honest is best – and early makes sense. You don’t have to convince someone to be your person.
Jason: I think her sharing those values resonated with me, and hearing her “lay down the law” was fine because I was there, too. I would say to millennial women, don’t be afraid to tell a mate what you want. You never know what that would lead to. Time is a precious commodity. Elise saying that early on showed me that she values both of our time. It showed her heart, character, and integrity, and I was drawn to that and the mature conversation. In the social media world, we don’t have those pointed conversations face-to-face. I would challenge readers to have those conversations in person, and you would get more from that convo than any post or reel. Because you see body language reactions and have deeper communication.
Yeah, I think sometimes women feel like they don’t want to put pressure on their partner. But it’s not pressure. Look, Jason and I are based in faith, and what is for us is for us. Being upfront and honest is best – and early makes sense. You don’t have to convince someone to be your person.
You both have mentioned time, family, and integrity. I’m curious what other core values do you both share?
Elise: Early on, our faith. Not just do you believe in God. It had to be deeper in that. I needed someone who would lead me, our home, and our family. I didn’t want to be in a push-and-pull relationship about prayer, church, or have conversations about being better people. Also, we discussed finances. That doesn’t just mean going to work. We chatted about ownership and what it looks like for us. How do we support each other individually and together? I know I like having my hands in a few different pots, and I needed someone who was supportive of that and likewise.
Jason: My background is that I was raised in the church. My father is a deacon and my mom is a deaconess. They've been married for 55 years. Faith was very important to me and it was crucial that my wife have that relationship as well.
Elise and Jason Robinson
Photo by FotosbyFola
Can we talk about challenges? Big or small, what are some things you had to grow through together?
Elise: I have never lived with anyone – not a roommate, a sister, friend, boyfriend or anything. Now, I’m in my 40s and I'm living with someone. When you’ve been by yourself for so long that was a challenge for both of us. We weren’t pulling each other's hair out but I’m a bit extreme. Things are color-coded in my closet. For me, working in news is chaotic so I want my home to be peaceful and organized.
Jason: I’m a man, and she’s a woman. That dynamic alone adds a flair to it. She wants things a certain way. She’s a Capricorn. But just in terms of how she wants to keep a home was a big adjustment for me. It took time.
On a smaller level, what are some of the things you disagree about day-to-day?
Elise: Cleanliness and systems. Like, he recycles and I do not. But sometimes I just have to decide if it really needs to be a thing or if I can just take care of it.
Jason: This is where my organization takes over (laughs).
What are your love languages? Do you know?
Elise: Jason’s is an act of service which works because I love cooking for him. It doesn’t feel like a chore to me. I love when I’m out, picking up his favorite juice. The other day I saw he needed t-shirts while folding clothes. So I just like doing small things for him that he doesn’t expect. He’s very much that guy that will ask to help so it doesn’t bother me.
Jason: I’d say Elise is all of them, but physical touch would probably be the biggest one. I had to get used to that. She’s taught me it in a number of ways. I remember we actually talked about love languages, and I sent her this song called “More Than Words” by Extreme. That explained to her how I felt.
Finally, can we end with the proposal? Tell us everything!
Jason: It was at a restaurant. And again, I was trying to find somewhere she hadn’t been. Also, I didn’t want to do it on our anniversary because that would have been too obvious. I contacted one of the restaurant’s staff and decided to change up the dessert menu. Each item was something special to us.
Elise: We go on so many date nights, so I just thought it was a regular night. We had finished eating, and I had to go to the bathroom. They had a nice mirror, girl. So I’m in there taking videos and stuff.
Jason: While she’s in the restroom, I’m getting everything in place with the waitress.
Elise: So as I’m reading the menu, I realize it’s telling our story and he eventually proposed. It was so special; I actually had the menu framed! It was so beautiful and thoughtful.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by FotosbyFola
This Is How To Make Essential Oils Your Ultimate Nail Health Hack
Something that I will forever back until the end of time is essential oils. One reason is that they are all-natural (essential oils are basicallyplant extracts). Another reason is that the (proven) holistic health benefits that come with using them (consistently) aredamn near endless. And lawd, don’t even get me started on how wonderful many of them smell — and how they tend to last longer than a lot of the perfumes and colognes that are out there. Definitely, for as long as essential oils are in existence, I’ll be singing their praises.
Today, the lane that I’m gonna be in is how you can apply certain essential oils to your nail care regimen. Since it should be the goal of all of us to be intentional about doing what we can to havestrong and healthy nails, I’m going to share with you 10 oils that are proven to help you reach that very goal (just make sure that youmix them with a carrier oil like apricot, grapeseed or jojoba first; essential oils are way more potent than they are oftentimes given credit for).
The Best Essential Oils for Nail Health
Getty Images
1. Tea Tree Oil
Believe it or not,nail fungus is pretty common.Some studies say that 1 in 10 people will experience it; that number jumps to 1 in 2 for individuals over 70. When it comes to this, signs to look out for are nails that look white, yellow, or brown, nails that seem to rise up from your nail bed, nails that are cloudy-looking in areas, and/or nails that easily break or split in more than one spot. Depending on how serious the fungal growth is, your doctor may prescribe an oral medication, a prescription-strength topical one, or even try a laser treatment of some sort.
However, if what you’re going through is minor, you might only needsome tea tree oil to get everything under control. Since it’s the type of essential oil that contains potent antifungal and antiseptic properties, applying it to nail fungus can significantly reduce fungal growth in a relatively short period of time without over-drying your nails in the process.
2. Myrrh Oil
Since myrrh oil contains so many powerful antioxidants and is able tokill harmful bacteria quickly, that already makes it a great essential oil for nail care. Also, since it contains properties that help to keep your skin healthy, it’s also a wonderful cuticle oil (especially if you mix it with a carrier oil like sweet almond oil, plum oil, or sesame oil). Another thing to keep in mind is if you’ve recently injured your nail(s) in some way, myrrh oil contains properties that help to reduce swelling at a pretty accelerated pace.
3. Juniper Berry Oil
An essential oil that has a good reputation for both healing as well as protecting your skin is juniper berry oil. In fact, if you’ve got a bit of foot odor going on or you’ve noticed some nail fungus creeping up, if you apply the oil to your feet (or nails) while you’re in the shower, it can help to eliminate the smells and speed up the healing process.
Another bonus about this particular oil is it has astringent properties that can help to keep your nails nice and clean.
Getty Images
4. Lavender Oil
Another oil that’s ideal forfighting nail fungus is lavender oil. In fact, in Healthline’s article, “Can You Use Essential Oil for Toenail Fungus?” lavender is on the list. That’s not all. If you happen to havenail eczema,the properties of lavender oil have the ability to soothe and heal the symptoms that come along with it, including nail softness and shedding. It’s also a good idea to keep in mind that if you want to addmoisture to your nails or cuticles, lavender oil is one that can hydrate your nails without a ton of residue.
5. Clove Oil
Since clove oil is considered to be an antimicrobial oil, it’s another one that is able to kill bacteria. Something else that’s cool about this oil is it can bring quick relief to pain and discomfort if you’ve broken a nail or you’ve got a hangnail that’s getting on your last nerve.Two other big wins about clove oil are it can help to even out any skin discoloration that you may have around your cuticles and it can help to keep your nails and hands looking youthful too (because, yes,nails do age).
6. Sage Oil
Sage oil also has some pretty impressive antibacterial properties in it. It also has the ability to condition your skin as well as your nails. This means that if you happen to struggle with brittle nails or nails that seem to peel, applying this oil to it can help to naturally reverse those issues. Also, if your nails seem to look a bit on the dull side, sage nails can give them a natural sheen if polish isn’t (really) your thing.
Getty Images
7. Geranium Oil
An essential oil that’s great at fighting off all types of infections isgeranium oil. What I especially like about it,as far as nail care is concerned, is that it’s got a solid reputation for moisturizing your nails so that they’re able to grow stronger and longer. Since it’s an oil thatcontains anti-aging properties, geranium oil can help to keep your hands (and feet) younger-looking for a longer period of time as well.
8. Lemon Oil
Hangnails are the absolute worst. Typically, those annoying things come as the result of having dry cuticles or constantly picking (or biting) the skin around your nails. If you make a cuticle oil out oflemon oil, not only can that help to nourish your cuticles and nails, but it can also repair any tissue damage that you may have as well as deeply cleanse your nails too. This, as a direct result, can help your nails to become stronger over time (plus, it doesn’t exactly taste the best, so it can help to keep your mouth off of your nails…which is a good thing).
9. Eucalyptus Oil
One of the most potent ways to treat a nail fungal infection is toapply some eucalyptus oil to it. In fact, one of the best things about taking this particular all-natural approach to a nail infection is it can kill the fungi without totally drying out your nails in the process. Also, if you’re looking for an oil that will protect your all-natural nails frompotential environmental damage, eucalyptus oil totally has your back as far as that is concerned.
10. Vanilla Oil
Now,I’m definitely preaching to the choir when I say that you should take a break from nail polish every once in a while. Just like your skin needs a mini-vacation from cosmetics and your hair needs one from the product (build-up), your nails need time to breathe on occasion, too; otherwise, the chemicals in the polish can lead to breakage, peeling, and weak nails overall. And while you’re on the break, try applying some vanilla oil to your nails and your nail beds.The antioxidants in the oil can help to speed up the healing process of your nails as well as reduce inflammation (if you’ve got any of that going on). It can also help to nourish your nails as they prepare for another few months of nail color.
___
I’m telling you, although there are all kinds of nail products on the market, if you get your hands on a few staple essential oils, you can feel confident that you’re giving your nails some chemical-free, holistically beneficial oils that will get your nails right in so many ways. I’m looking at my nails as I’m typing all of this out, and I can certainly attest to it. Try it — ain’t no way that you (and your nails) won’t like it!
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by ozgurdonmaz/Getty Images