

Dear Queen: An Open Letter To The Graduate Unsure Of What's Next
Dear Queen:
You did it! The moment you envisioned, the one that felt like a distant dream a few years ago, has finally arrived. You are officially a graduate of a higher learning institution. Graduation time comes with several cliches. You will inevitably hear a speech about following your dreams. You will reminisce on all your experiences, good and bad, that led you to this moment. And a relative will gift you with Oh, The Places You'll Go. It all sounds nice and it's very comforting but after the pomp and circumstance, the anxiety sets in. What am I supposed to do now?
I remember my own graduation day perfectly. While I was excited to finally finish, I was also seriously uncertain about my future. Some of my peers had jobs lined up in big cities or even higher degrees to attain the following semester. But me? Nothing but a piece of paper.
I was more than uncertain, I was scared.
And I was jealous of everyone else who seemed to have it figured out. I kept thinking to myself, Shouldn't I have my sh*t together by now? Am I failing already?
Several years later, I realize that these feelings are totally normal. Even the ones who have it seemingly "figured out" will have doubts about their future. Now that I'm able to look back at that time, I truly appreciate my shaky transition into the real world.
As you venture into the land of adulting, there are several things you must remember:
You have all the tools necessary for success.
All that you need to survive and thrive in the real world is already within you. The past few years have prepared you to handle unexpected turns and obstacles. You already know how to be resilient, how to stand up for yourself, how to be a go-getter. Don't discount the many strengths your college experience has equipped you with.
Your first job out of school will not be your best.
The job of your dreams will more than likely not be your first - and that's okay. But it will be exactly the job you need at the time. Your first will be part of your story. Even if you hate it, it's an important chapter in your life because it will help ignite your true passions. Your first job teaches you what you really want out of life.
Related: Your First Job Won't Be Your Dream Job
Let go of the idea of instant success.
Personally, the most frustrating thing after graduation was realizing my degree in itself was not enough. For months, I applied to countless jobs without so much as a response. Hadn't I put in all the hard work? Hadn't I proven my readiness for a career?
After airing my frustrations out to my mom, she told me something I will never forget:
"You're so used to instant gratification and you have to realize life is not that way."
In school, if you study hard enough, you get an A. But in the adult world, there are million things that factor into your success. So stop resting on your laurels and remind yourself that success won't happen overnight. But it will happen in due time.
You won't have all the answers.
It's okay to not know where you're going or how you will get there. You will spend your whole life trying to understand yourself and your passions. You will realize that your education is hardly over but just beginning. Self-discovery is a ongoing process and you will continue to learn about the world and yourself on a daily basis.
Stop the comparisons.
Comparison is violence against the self. Another person's success has nothing to do with you and constantly measuring yourself up to others will only distract you from your purpose.
Put down Instagram. Stop checking Facebook. The grass is probably not as green as they're making it out to be anyway. Your journey is your own so savor every step it takes to get to your personal destination.
Don't limit yourself.
Have you ever had a dream so big that it scared you? Good. Now dream even bigger. It's easy to stay practical and do what you think is expected of you. But you're at a time in your life where risks are meant to be taken. Move to that big city. Travel to a foreign country. Take the job that will challenge you. Don't play safe, choose adventure.
Be present
It's hard not to preoccupy yourself with what the future may hold. But there is no time more precious than the present. You just did something only 30% of the population does. So bask in the moment! Congratulate yourself. Celebrate.
Of course, your degree is more than just a piece of paper. In all its lightness, it carries heavy memories. It carries the sleepless nights, the countless hours in the library, the tears shed over grades and boys and the distance between you and your family. It even holds the happier times such as the lifelong friends you made, the professors that challenged your way of thinking, and the crazy nights you will never forget.
Your degree is a physical representation of your growth, your power, and your journey.
If I had reminded myself of these things earlier and more frequently, I would have had a smoother transition into the real world. I hope that as you hold your degree, you are confident that you are extraordinary and that great things lie ahead of you. It's okay not to know what's next, but just know that the next step will elevate you closer to your goals.
Featured image by Getty Images
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Anndi Jinelle is a part-time creative and full-time corporate cog in the machine living in Brooklyn, NY. This 20-something spends most of her days going from coffee to wine, moving closer to her truth, and watching way more TV than is humanly possible. Catch her on Twitter @seranndipity.
Smile, Sis! These Five Improvements Can Upgrade Your Oral Hygiene Instantly
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.
Smile, Sis! These Five Improvements Can Upgrade Your Oral Hygiene Instantly
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.