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Basking In My Baldness: How I Discovered Self-Love After Hair Loss
If I knew what the price of my "YES" looked like before submitting to God's will for my life, I would have said it over and over again even if "NO" was in the equation.
As life went on, I soon realized that the price of my "yes" was expensive as hell.
I remember asking God what our original conversation was like in heaven and what did I agree to before I was sent to this earth? I tell you one thing, we as willing vessels must remember that our "YES" never started here on earth, but our commitment begin when we said "YES" in heaven.
Defining My Beauty Outwardly
Growing up, I had long, thick, wooly hair that touched the middle of my back. I would get bullied not only about my big lips, nose, and eyes, but also because of my beautiful hair. I would often hide my lips and keep quiet in school because I didn't want my peers to remind me of what others had already consistently made fun of me about.
All these insecurities manifested in my early childhood and translated into adulthood. Many of us, including myself, spend our adult life recovering from our childhood and it can cost you in so many ways if you are not willing to step outside yourself to heal and/or get help.
On my journey to self-love, I found my voice through the art of dance, which provided me with an opportunity to understand the power of self-investment. At an early age, I believed in investing in my personal interests, my character, and my spiritual development because I wanted to be the best that I could be. When your life lacks structure and has no previous blueprint, you must create it so that it makes sense to you and how you choose to live your life abundantly.
We must remember to take time for the things that matter the most, invest in ourselves, apply what will work, and never get so high in life that we can't listen to anyone or learn anything new.
Les Brown said it best, "You are never too old to learn and you're never too young to teach."
Discovering My Beauty Inwardly
I was 18 years old when I started to lose my long hair, and the balding drastically permeated throughout my entire scalp, causing me to lose 70% of my hair. From hot-comb sessions, perms, braids, and other hair styles, the damage was slowly beginning.
Life without hair took me to some extreme places, such as dealing with dark depression, anxiety, insecurities, as well as an autoimmune disorder.
For years, I hid behind wigs, scarves, head wraps, and hats because I was so insecure about my condition. I even learned how to use tricks to make it appear like I had a head full of hair using keratin protein hair fibers. On Tuesday, June 19, 2018, I finally got down to the bottom of my condition and was diagnosed with CCCA, which stands for Central Centrifugal Cicatricial Alopecia. To add to that, some of my scalp was also covered with folliculitis, which is inflammation of the hair follicles.
What most people don't know is that my condition affected my personal and professional life as an artist, causing me to lose interest in dance because I felt exposed and embarrassed, especially in an entertainment industry where image perception means everything.
Learning To Reveal So We Can Heal
After 8 ½ years of research and no final solutions for my hair condition, I looked in the mirror on Saturday June 23, 2018. That day, God wanted me to show Him/Her how beautiful I was regardless of my hair condition. So, I went to the mirror, grabbed my clippers, and went to shaving my hair again. Moreover, I did it because I had found the courage and GOD-fidence to see what God saw.
I embraced my condition, took some time off social media, and put my needs first. I listened to my body and kept in mind that what's happening externally is happening internally, and what's happening in the physical realm first manifests itself in the spiritual realm.
Thank you, God, for taking away my hair because it meant that I needed to get closer to you, to understand what true love is, and to not depend on it to validate my beauty. I can now say that my glory is not found in my crown (hair), but is embedded in the makeup of me.
The price of our "YES' can be expensive as hell, I tell you. The things we go through aren't about us, and instead make us stronger to then help others. I want to encourage anyone that battles with the silent unforbidden wars of extreme hair loss.Let us bow our heads in honor of acknowledging the loss but let us raise our heads to gain our self-esteem back and fix our tilted crowns.
As Iyanla Vanzant says, "We can't heal what we don't reveal."
Don't mind me, I'm just basking in my baldness!
Featured image by Shanelle Amor
Shanelle Amor is a choreographer, creative director, artist developer, dance teacher, and educator. She is currently working bi-coastal in the entertainment industry (LA & ATL) and is constantly looking to hire or collobarate with other talented artists that are passionate about achieving their career goals. If you would like to connect, book, and or collobarate with her please be sure to follow her on all social media platforms @shanelleamor and email her at shanelleamorbooking@gmail.com.
This article is sponsored by Hulu.
UnPrisonedhas returned for its highly anticipated second season, delving deeper into the complex dynamics of the Alexander family.
The series premiere comes a year after its debut season garnered rave reviews from fans and critics and earned record-breaking ratings for Hulu's Onyx Collective brand. UnPrisoned's success can be attributed to its raw, relatable themes and comedic appeal.
Inspired by creator Tracy McMillan's life, the show follows Paige (Kerry Washington), a therapist and single mother whose life takes an unexpected turn when her father, Edwin (Delroy Lindo) --who was released from prison-- moves in with her and her teenage son, Finn (Faly Rakotohavana).
Throughout UnPrisoned's first season, viewers witnessed how Edwin's incarceration deeply affected Paige's life and relationships. In the series, Paige unpacks her trauma through interactions with her inner child and her online followers. Meanwhile, Edwin is overcoming specific struggles with his own past that led to his life of crime, including a dysfunctional upbringing and his mother's arrest. As the Alexanders attempt to reconcile, new challenges arise.
This new season promises to further explore their unconventional family dynamic. Here are several compelling reasons why season two of UnPrisoned should be on everyone's watchlist.
The Alexander Family Life Is Still In Shambles
UnPrisoned's second season resumes where the series left off, with Paige grappling with the fallout from her troubled therapy practice and Edwin navigating life independently after moving out. Meanwhile, Finn faces his own challenges. The teenager is battling anxiety and seeking information about his father—a topic Paige avoids discussing.
The Alexander Family Are Attending Therapy To Resolve Their Underlying Issues
Amid the chaos in their lives, the Alexander family decides to mend their bond by confronting their past traumas. They seek professional help and attend therapy sessions with a “family radical healing coach,” played by John Stamos, a new cast member. This collective effort aims to unravel the complexities of their shared history and strengthen their relationships.
The process of unraveling each character's internal conflicts and their potential impact on future relationships may clash with Paige's textbook therapy approach. While Paige is used to being in the therapist's seat in both career and family, this forces her into the unfamiliar role of a patient during therapy sessions. This shift would compel her to look in the mirror and try a radically different approach.
The Alexander Family Learned A Big Lesson During A Therapy Session
In therapy, the Alexanders are tasked with addressing their individual traumas to salvage their remaining relationships. One of the family therapist’s eccentric suggestions was an exercise involving a family wrestling match. During this session, Paige faces tough questions about her refusal to share information about Finn's father.
While it's unclear whether this scene is reality or fantasy, the image of the family duking it out in the ring certainly makes for hilarious yet compelling television.
Paige Tries Dating Again Following Failed Relationships
Amid her life's chaos, Paige decides to step back into the dating field. However, her many attempts have left her with mixed results. The dating apps have turned out to be a fail, and an outing with her ex Mal (Marque Richardson), who is also her father's parole officer, doesn’t go quite as expected after he brings an unexpected guest – his new girlfriend.
The situation takes an awkward turn when Mal's new partner learns why the former couple split, partly due to Paige's self-sabotage.
UnPrisoned Is A Perfect Balance Of Comedy And Drama
As a dramedy, UnPrisoned takes a comedic approach to its heavy subjects. The show takes us on a ride with Paige's dating misadventures and navigating a friendship with her ex.
Other lighthearted moments include Edwin's attempts at CPR based on online videos and, of course, the antics of the Alexander family's unconventional new healing coach.
The second season of UnPrisoned is now available on Hulu.
UnPrisoned | Season 2 Trailer | Hulu
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Mariee Revere On Her History-Making Million-Dollar Sales And The Future Of MoonXCosmetics
If the name Mariee Revere sounds familiar, it's probably because you heard of her beauty and skincare brand, MoonXCosmetics, or you may have heard about her history-making achievement of making $1.8 million in less than eight minutes. But before starting her million-dollar brand, Mariee was just a teenager trying to cure her acne.
While she grew up in the skincare capital of the world, South Korea, Mariee didn't really experience breakouts until her senior year of high school. Like many people who get their first breakout, she didn't know what to do, and there weren't many products out there at that time. So she decided to experiment. What she didn't know was that what she came up with would ultimately be her ticket to success.
"When I graduated high school, I moved back to America, Georgia, and I ended up making, like, the oil, the Rose Galore oil, which is like the staple product of my brand. I don't know what made me make it, but I did, and it literally cleared my face up," she tells xoNecole in an exclusive interview.
"I end up selling it as a body oil first because, obviously, I'm 17, [and] don't have any background as an esthetician or anything like that. I just made a product that worked for me, but people bought it and was using it, and I reformulated it, and then it just stuck like with me."
While MoonXCosmetics is known for its facial products, it wants to expand to body care and home. It just released its new product, Moon-Gel body wash, and it's only up from there. As Mariee continues to grow the brand, it's more than likely that she will see more history-making moments. And so far she has.
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When asked if she feels pressure to obtain more of those milestones, she says yes and no. "I did $1.8 [million] again, and then I did $2 million but I feel like now, currently, I don't look at that as one of my goals anymore because [of] the headache and just everything that came with it, but I was thankful and blessed to have that milestone, but now I'm looking for more," she says.
"I want to say more reach than more like fast-paced sales. I do want that. Obviously, every girl wants that, but I do want to have a better overall reach for my brand because I did take two years off so I was able to learn, [and] study a lot of different things. See how things have changed from 2020 to now."
"I did $1.8 [million] again, and then I did $2 million but I feel like now, currently, I don't look at that as one of my goals anymore because [of] the headache and just everything that came with it, but I was thankful and blessed to have that milestone, but now I'm looking for more."
Another part of expanding for any company is hiring people. Finding the right person to help you can be a hassle, especially for business owners who are used to doing all the work themselves. Mariee can relate to this, and she touched on this topic in her documentaryThe Million Dollar Story. She recommends having someone be your "right-hand man" who you trust to handle the ins and outs of the company.
"I could say, definitely get, like a right-hand man to help you within the process because that really was what helped me. I never had a job. I literally was 18 now, being like, you know, the boss of over 30+ employees at one point in time, and I didn't know anything. I didn't know anything about no W-2s, no taxes, no clock in, clock out because all I [have] ever known was my brand," she explains.
"So I definitely partner with people who are very skewed and versed in those areas, and they helped me get through it. Even to this day, I still have my same person helping me with hiring, firing, [and] doing everything that I can right now because I'm still learning. But obviously people get jobs young, so they have way more experience than me, but still learning."
And though she is still learning, one thing she makes sure to stay on top of is being consistent. Consistency is what trips many people up when it comes to achieving goals, but Mariee says it's all about scheduling. Whether it's when to post on social media or email marketing, scheduling it out can make a world of difference. That same practice also works when planning out her future goals for the company.
"Right now, future goals would be to drop at least five more products before the end of the year. We always do outreach, where we do drives and all that, but definitely do way more this year, she says. "Then really dive into body [care], and then hopefully open up MoonXBody underneath MoonXCosmetics to let that branch out and be open and definitely get back consistent."
For more information, visit moonxco.com.
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