Dear Body: I'm Recommitting To Protecting And Nurturing You
Dear Body:
I have taken you for granted, forsaken you, and lacked appreciation. I've fed you lies, and I didn't take pride in what I had. I hid you on the days I wanted to reveal you. I questioned you when I couldn't believe my eyes. I manipulated you, and I didn't put you on the list as my No. 1 priority. I've sat back and allowed you to dwindle. I've ignored you when you would beg for my attention. At times you would act out in front of your friend's inflammation and soreness. I can feel the resentment you have against me. You should be angry, sad, and filled with trauma. I didn't cherish the love I should have with you. I was ignorant in thinking that in time you will be healed or if I ignored your screams, you would finally keep quiet.
I knew of you, but I chose not to get to know you. I read up on how you function but was never interested enough to apply what I read.
In my teens and early 20s, I would starve you and didn't feed you the nutrients you deserved. I didn't stretch you or take you out on walks. On the days I decided to listen to you, it was too late. By the end of the day, I no longer had it in me to take care of you. I was depleted, tired, and ran down. In my mind, the only way I knew how to heal you was to lie down. I would lie down for twenty minutes to only work my eyes to death, staring at a screen that doesn't give me life. I allowed my brain to be polluted with lies. I didn't train my mind as I should have.
I didn't love you, and that's what hurts the most. I allowed outside influences, such as fast-food peer pressure, to lead me into thinking I was doing the right thing. As your roommate, I'm saddened that I allowed us to get to this point. I've made a plethora of promises to get better, and I've failed you.
I say all of this to say, thank you. I thank you for continuously giving me a second chance every day. I thank you for showing patience. I thank you for forgiving me before I make another mistake. I am humbled and blessed to have a friend so loyal and kind.
In seven months, I will be 34, and before that lucky day arrives, I want to do everything in my power to make sure my body will be present on that particular day. I know, I know. We've had this song and dance too many times. I've let that woman dictate when to care for you. I've realized that it is a must that I preserve my body. Any subtle changes to my lifestyle would make you appreciate my love for you more. I can no longer sit on the sidelines on a hot California day and not want to reveal you to the world and take a dip in the pool to keep you cool.
I can no longer get anxiety walking into a department store, hoping and praying that "something fits", and I can't let how I see you dictate how I internally feel.
For any of us to start loving our bodies, we have to be truthful and meditate on the journey. Once you become open to seeing all of your faults, you can make the necessary first steps. I think we as women have gotten it mixed up. It's evident that we all aren't the same in height, shape, and DNA. I think it's time to think of our bodies as an investment for longevity. We have to be mindful of what we feed our bodies for the long term.
We should start loving and embracing how certain things make us feel. I can do it. We can do it. Let's enjoy our bodies together and change the narrative of what health and self-esteem look and feel like.
xoNecole is always looking for new voices and empowering stories to add to our platform. If you have an interesting story or personal essay that you'd love to share, we'd love to hear from you. Contact us at submissions@xonecole.com.
Featured image by Shutterstock
Writer, Empath, Listener, Self Improver, and a motivational speaker to her homegirls Teisha LeShea currently resides in California who loves to add fifteen million items to her Amazon cart. She is passionate about wellness, spiritual improvement, leveling up, and setting up twice a month therapy appointments. She writes with you in mind. Her listicle and personal stories will inspire you to dig deep within yourself to be a better you. You can follow her on Instagram @teisha.leshea and & @tl_teisha.leshea
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Sheila Rashid's Androgynous Approach To Unisex Clothing Is A Lesson In Embracing Individuality
The ItGirl 100 List is a celebration of 100 Black women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table.
For Sheila Rashid, it all started with some free-hand drawings and a few strokes of paint.
The Chicago-based clothing designer and creative director of Sheila Rashid Brand recalls using her spare time in high school to hand paint designs on t-shirts and distressed hoodies, distributing them to classmates as walking billboards for her art.
Rashid sought to pursue fashion design at Columbia College in Chicago but eventually took the self-taught route to build upon her knack for crafting one-of-a-kind, androgynous pieces.
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Thanks to the mentorship of local designers taking her under their wings, Rashid was able to gain valuable experience in putting together collections and creating patterns; equipping her with them with the necessary skills to pursue her own collections.
After two years of living in New York, Rashid returned home to the Chi and uncovered the unique flair she could offer the city. “I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world,” she tells xoNecole. “That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
For the Midwest native, inspiration comes from her time around creative peers and the city’s notorious winters — known to be a main character in many Chicagoans stories. “It's a different perspective and mindset when I'm making stuff because of the weather here,” she explains. “When we get summer, it’s ‘Summertime Chi’ — it's amazing. It's beautiful. Still, I find myself always making clothes that cater to the winter.”
"I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world. That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
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Many designers have a signature aesthetic or theme in their creations. In Rashid’s design story, dancing between the lines of femininity and masculinity is how she’s been able to distinguish herself within the industry. Her androgynous clothing has garnered the eye of celebrities like Zendaya, Chance the Rapper, WNBA star Sydney Colson, and more — showing her range and approach to designs with inclusivity in mind.
“I think I do reflect my own style,” she says. “When I do make pieces, I'm very tomboyish, androgynous. My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes.” From denim to overalls, and color-drenched outerwear, Rashid has mastered the structure of statement pieces that tell a story.
“Each collection, I never know what's going to be the thing I'm going to focus on. I try to reflect my own style and have fun with the storytelling,” she shares. “I look at it more like it's my art in this small way of expressing myself, so it's not that calculated.”
"My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes."
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Still, if you were able to add up all the moments within Rashid’s 20-year career in design, one theme that has multiplied her into becoming an “ItGirl” is her confidence to take up space within the fashion industry as a queer, Black woman. “Being an ItGirl is about being yourself, loving what you do, finding your niche, and mastering that,” she says.
No matter where you are on your ItGirl journey, Rashid says to always remain persistent and never hesitate to share your art with the world. “Don’t give up. Even if it's something small, finish it and don't be afraid to put it out,” she says, “It's about tackling your own fear of feeling like you have to please everybody, but just please yourself, and that's good enough.”
To learn more about the ItGirl 100 List, view the full list here.
Featured image Courtesy