How We Met is a series where xoNecole talks love and relationships with real-life couples. We learn how they met, how like turned into love, and how they make their love work.
After meeting by way of mutual friends at an HBCU homecoming almost ten years ago, Tenesia and Terence exchanged numbers only to go their separate ways and move on with their lives. It wasn't until randomly meeting again at a club years later that the two would realize that their encounter wasn't a coincidence, it was fate.
After months of pursuing a long-distance relationship, the couple now shares a home with a few fur babies in Raleigh, NC and according to Tenesia and Terence, their love story is just getting started. In a recent interview with xoNecole, the couple opened up about their first encounter, taking the first steps in their relationship, and learning to cope when you and your partner speak different love languages.
While it's true that opposites attract, this fact can also cause a lot of friction in your relationship. Tenesia told xoNecole, "Terence and I are complete opposites in a lot of areas. And although that works to our advantage in so many ways, it can also cause challenges. I think the most challenging thing for me is acknowledging those differences and learning how to navigate around them, especially in communication."
The couple explained that although there have been times when their relationship has been challenging, there hasn't been a moment that it wasn't worth it. To read more about how Tenesia and Terence's chance encounter slowly but surely evolved into a modern-day love story, scroll below!
How They Met
Terence: I first met Tenesia at North Carolina A&T University's Homecoming almost a decade ago. I was leaving a concert with my line brothers and one of my line brothers wanted to meet up with some friends he knew as we walked back to our car. He began introducing me to everyone and all I wanted to know is who's the cutie in the backseat. He got to Tenesia and we exchanged some words, I showed my charm (laughs) which led to us exchanging numbers and guess what? We never texted each other after that day—talk about dropping the ball.
Years went by without us ever talking until one random night at the club where we met for the first time all over again, or at least that's what Tenesia thought at first. I always knew who she was. I mean how could I forget her? Anyways, we went to exchange numbers again and noticed we already had each other's contacts in our phone. After feeling stupid and laughing it over, we took a white gummy bear shot together—I'll never forget—and the rest was history.
Tenesia: Our "how we met" story will always be one of my favorite stories to tell because it happened twice. It was fate (laughs).
First Impressions
Terence: My first impression of Tenesia was that she was a true free spirit that loved to have fun. She gave off an amazing vibe that made me feel like no one ever did. Plus, she was drop-dead gorgeous and to this day she is saved in my phone as "Gorg".
Tenesia: My first impression was, "Well, he's gorgeous!" But after talking that night, it just felt so natural and easy. I could tell he was super respectful and I immediately felt comfortable around him.
Instagram/@tenesiaandterence
"We spent all night just talking and vibing on someone's dock at the beach. It was so good that we didn't realize we were out there until like 5am. It was a romantic's dream."
First Date
Terence: Tenesia will probably say our first date was at the state fair which was probably the first "planned" date but I always thought it was this night at the beach when we first started talking. I was in her town for the weekend and we, of course, met up. We spent all night just talking and vibing on someone's dock at the beach. It was so good that we didn't realize we were out there until like 5am. It was a romantic's dream.
Tenesia: Our first date was the North Carolina State Fair. I have always loved the fair so I was so excited! We took a picture at the cheesy little display they have when you walk in and rode pretty much every ride! Terence even convinced me to get on the Ferris wheel (which I am terrified of). I remember he played the game where you have to stand the glass bottle up straight using a ring connected to a string on a pole and he was so determined to win me the biggest prize. Now that we've been together for years, it makes perfect sense because Terence will keep working at something until he gets it right! He did end up winning me a huge bear and then he carried it around the rest of the night.
Making It Official
Terence: Tenesia's answer is probably funnier because she always believed she coerced me into being in a relationship with her after a couple's weekend mountain retreat. We were surrounding a bonfire and she basically said, "We're now together." And I was like, "Yeah, I guess so…" I didn't know that was going to be the weekend we made it official but she definitely did (laughs). We later confirmed we both wanted this relationship to be official during the car ride home but the night before was iffy.
Tenesia: I knew it was time to make it official when I went on a trip to the mountains with him and his friends. We had been dating a couple of months and I was just like, "I'm not letting this get away." I knew what I wanted and told him! It worked.
The “L” Word
Terence: Honestly, I cannot remember the first time I said I love you but I was definitely the first to say it for sure. Must be the Cancer in me...
Tenesia: This sounds so bad but I honestly can't remember the first time we said I love you! I know that I was feeling myself falling for him for so long before I ever said it though. And I'm 90% sure he said it first!
"Over time, I think I just knew Tenesia was the one. She became the only person I wanted to be around. She challenged me, encouraged me, and made me a better man. She loves me despite my flaws and I naturally wanted to create a future with her. We never second-guessed anything together, no matter how crazy it sounded."
The One
Terence: I always believed that someone becomes the one versus just finding "the one". You can have an amazing spark with someone but you may not be compatible long-term. You have to teach each other and show them how you need to be loved. Over time, I think I just knew Tenesia was the one. She became the only person I wanted to be around. She challenged me, encouraged me, and made me a better man. She loves me despite my flaws and I naturally wanted to create a future with her. We never second-guessed anything together, no matter how crazy it sounded.
Tenesia: I knew Terence was the one before we were ever officially together. It was when we first started talking/dating... he came down to visit me and we went out with my friends. The night was super fun and after the bar closed we went for a walk on the beach. We ended up talking for hours and it just felt right. Like everything that I thought had gone wrong before, went wrong for a reason to eventually lead me to meeting him (again) and to that night. I even texted my friend after that night and told her that I knew Terence was it!
Trading Spaces
Terence: Tenesia decided to be a travel nurse within our first year of dating. I had the idea of her taking a contract in the city where I lived and just staying with me. It just made sense, we were always traveling to see each other plus why not save money by staying together.
Tenesia: We made ourselves official in November and moved in together that next May. I'm pretty sure I brought it up because I wanted us to be able to spend more time together. Plus, I was tired of driving back and forth!
Building Together
Terence: Well, first comes marriage and then (laughs)... is there some bling-bling in Tenesia's future? Stay tuned. We really want to build our Tenesia And Terence empire and become financially free. We also want to move to our dream location and settle down.
Tenesia: We just bought our first house together in June 2019 and are already talking about moving again in the near future! But running Instagram and our blog together and trying to build our brand is one of our main focuses as far as building together. We are always brainstorming new ideas to build our empire!
Instagram/@tenesiaandterence
"We've learned that communication is key. We have different ways of communicating but we've both come to the understanding that we have to talk things out in order to get past them."
Overcoming Challenges
Terence: We rarely have a true confrontation with each other but when we do we just talk it out or realize it's not a big deal. The good thing about us is we can't stay mad at each other and always work it out.
Tenesia: We've learned that communication is key. We have different ways of communicating but we've both come to the understanding that we have to talk things out in order to get past them. We honestly don't argue often, but even in the little disagreements, we try to take a step back and understand where the other person is coming from.
Favorite Things
Terence: My favorite thing about Tenesia is the way she is never satisfied with being average and complacent in life. She is always dreaming of life without limits and believing that both of us can achieve anything. She has a very unorthodox way of thinking.
Tenesia: My favorite thing about Terence is how thoughtful he is. From tiny things he says or does that lets me know he was listening when I thought he wasn't. Making sure I chug water after I've been drinking so I don't have a headache the next day. Or never coming home without calling me first to see if I need anything. He really is just the sweetest guy!
For more Tenesia & Terence, follow them on Instagram!
Featured image by Instagram/@TenesiaandTerence.
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"Both Will and Carlton have spent the school year going through their own individual things and now this summer, they’re both working at the country club. Trying to make a little extra coin. They are starting a company, it’s a company called Blackccess, through Quentin’s [Vic Mensa's] Young, Gifted, & Black program. They’re getting up to some hijinks. They’re doing a little bit of street racing and most importantly, Carlton is falling in love. I can tell you it’s going to be a hot boy summer indeed."
"This summer is kind of a hot boy healing summer."
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If you've taken one look at the trailer, then the mere mention of Carlton's brewing romance should also not sit right with your nerves but according to Olly, it's the new love-to-hate couple that you won't be able to take your eyes off of. "Everyone deserves love first of all. Everyone deserves a celebration of love," Olly pleads. "The season begins about 30 days after the end of season 2. Carlton has been in rehab for a month. He is on the journey to recovery and the journey to recovery is not a linear one. Amira (Alycia Pascual-Peña) in a lot of ways complicates that. But she also completes him. So, can you blame him? He’s really just a young Black man trying to find love." When asked to describe Carlton and Amira’s relationship in one word, Olly quickly chooses "dangerous," which should speak volumes.
While there are many things that will leave you anxious when it comes to the latest season, there are also many powerful lessons being divulged simultaneously. One is the show's mission to show off the different facets of the Black experience and Aunt Viv (Cassandra Freeman) and Uncle Phil's (Adrian Holmes) quest to turn their young boys into hardworking Black men. "With this show, we really wanted to show the different facets of the Black experience.
Will comes from Philly, he comes from a place of not having very much and he meets Carlton, who has had everything given to him. They’re both black kids and they both navigate the world in their own Blackness in different ways," explains Olly. "But Aunt Viv and Uncle Phil are just so insistent like 'we have to work for what we got so y’all are going to do that too.' I think working builds character. For me, up until very recently when acting took off, I’ve had a job. Then during the summer, I’d pick up another job. Stories like that matter because that’s the real. That’s just the real world and that’s what people are doing out here."
Olly is also excited about the upcoming guest cameos, one of which is a heavy hitter. In the past, we've seen Daphne Maxwell Reid and Tatyana Ali on the reboot. Joseph Marcell is now coming back, who played the Banks family’s butler Geoffrey on the '90s hit sitcom. "I got to talk to Joseph," the Bel-Air star recalls.
"He’s just one of those people that are so wise. He’s so wise and so warm, and willing to give his foresight and knowledge on things. There’s something almost overwhelming about having original cast members on our show when they do come, it’s like, 'Oh my God. You walked so I can run.' And they’ve all said it. Joseph said it, Tatyana Ali said it and Will [Smith] even said it the other day: Watching our version of the show is so incredible for them because our show really gets to dive in deep on all the things that they could only kind of touch cause it was the ‘90s, it was a 30-minute comedy, and it was on network TV.
"Watching our version of the show is so incredible for them because our show really gets to dive in deep on all the things that they could only kind of touch cause it was the ‘90s, it was a 30-minute comedy, and it was on network TV."
"Like we’re [here] today. We’re on streaming. We can really go there. We can get very serious, and it’s interesting because whenever the old cast comes to set, they’re sort of like this mirror of reverence for each other. It’s a really magical experience." Olly says he would love to also have Alfonso Ribiero, who originated the role of Carlton, on the show one day soon. "We met actually at the Bad Boys for Life premiere and we exchanged a few words to each other. I was like, 'Thank you, you are an icon for laying down the groundwork for this role.' I’d love to have him pull through. It would be dope."
Along with the cameos, the stars of the reboot will also be recreating some of the iconic scenes we love in season 3. "How are we going to pull off Jazz being thrown out of the house? I think that’s been one of the biggest conversations we all had." Continuing, "How do you take that thing that is just so inherently funny? How do you take that and put it in our long series version? We don’t know but I know that the writers have something planned and when that happens, oh my God! I’m really excited to see that. And also, the moment when Carlton tries to get into a fraternity, and they essentially turn him down like 'You’re not what we’re looking for.'
"Then Carlton basically tells them like, 'Nah, I am Black. I’m my version of Black. And you’re a version of Black. We can all exist in the same place without challenging each other.' I’m excited to see what that scene looks like with our take on it." And of course, xoNecole had to ask about the iconic scene with Uncle Phil where Will gets emotional while reflecting on the relationship with his father. You may recall Will sobbing while questioning his father's love for him, "How come he don’t want me?" According to Olly, fans just might be getting that too. "I won’t say nothing but you’re right. That should be in the show at some point," he says with a big smile.
Courtesy
All in all, Olly may be one of the costars of the biggest dramas on Peacock right now but that hasn't stopped him from pursuing his music dreams at the same time. The Bel-Air star explains that even though acting has taken center stage, music has always been his first love.
"I think I fell in love with music first. As a kid, every Sunday after church, I would come home and put every single Michael Jackson DVD on and I’d watch them all," he remembers. "Name a Michael Jackson music video, I’ve seen it. So, I think I fell in love with music first but what I think was so incredible and groundbreaking about Michael’s music videos is that the core of it is storytelling. So, even though I was still falling in love with his music, I was falling in love with the acting and the production elements of it all. It’s weird because I kind of developed my love for both together. But, I’d say music is my first love."
The multi-hyphenate just released a new single "Bodye"— an Afrobeats-inspired track sure to get you on your feet. "I’m a kid of immigrants. I grew up on old-school Afrobeats. I grew up on Texas trap music. I grew up on East Coast hip-hop. I grew up on R&B. So, with my music, I’m pulling from so many of these inspirations. But specifically, with Afrobeats, Afrobeats be making you dance! Sometimes, you don’t even know what they’re saying but you’re like 'I just want to move.' So, for a record where I feel like my goal is to make people dance, having that influence felt really important in the song."
While there's no project release yet, the music video for "Bodye" is on the way, and more to come. "Right now, I’m building out my artist journey with singles." Continuing, "Rema is a beast. Rema’s latest album, "Heis,” is just incredible. It’s one of the first Afrobeats albums that I’ve heard in a while where I feel like it’s pushing the genre forward. It’s clearly inspired by the old-school Afrobeats that we grew up on, D’Banj, P-Square. But it still feels forward-facing. The sound design is incredible. I would love to work with Asake and Rema. They’re both just incredible artists."
With so much going on, Olly Sholotan has no plans of slowing down. His dreams are becoming a reality right before our eyes and it's a beautiful sight to see. "This is the only dream I had since I was a kid. I’ve always wanted to tell stories and be an entertainer for a living. It means the world to me. Every night when I go to bed I’m like, 'What’s happening?!'”
Stream season 3 of Bel-Air on Peacock now.
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