6 Signs You're "Faking It" (When It Comes To Your Relationships)
Whenever you hear the phrase "faking it", what immediately comes to your mind? If you said faking orgasms, listen, I'm totally with you. In fact, I actually wrote an article for the site about how I personally think that faking it is a form of manipulation (you can read it here). Oh, but there are other ways to fake it in life, chile. Other ways to manipulate people by being fake too.
That's what we're gonna unpack today. Unfortunately, because so much of our lives is filled with some level of media, sometimes, it's challenging to separate what is real from what isn't—from what it really does mean to be fake. To be fake is to be disingenuous. To be fake is to pretend. To be fake is to "conceal the real", so that you can appear more attractive or interesting to others. The problem with all of this is when something is based on fakeness, you can never really trust it because it's all an illusion; a mirage.
Today, let's pull the masks off. Let's do so by looking at some pretty telling signs that you (or someone you know) are faking it, not when it comes to coitus, but when it comes to your relationships with other people. Hopefully, if you see yourself in any of these, you'll feel compelled to break these habits, so that you can cultivate connections with those who know, respect and appreciate you—the real you.
1. “Honest”, “Genuine”, “Direct” Aren’t the Words That Are Used to Describe You—EVER
You remember when grandma used to say that cussing is a sign of not being very intelligent? I always think about that when I come up on studies that reveal things like it's actually smarter folks who tend to use four-letter words. Know what else research says that cussing is an indication of being? More honest. While being liked by the masses has never really been a concern or goal of mine, I will say that the older (and prayerfully wiser) I get, the more I care about being known and respected as an individual rather than everyone simply "liking" me.
A big part of that is because, a lot of the people I personally know who are considered likeable, when I peek behind their curtain and they share some of their vulnerabilities, oftentimes, they don't like themselves very much. And a big part of the reason why is they are so caught up in being popular that they hide a lot of their true selves—including their views, values and even wants and needs (we'll get more into that last part in a bit). Bottom line, they are basically so into being liked that they aren't really very honest with themselves—which makes it close to impossible to be honest with the individuals around them.
It's a pretty miserable existence to have everyone think that you are awesome when you're not even revealing your authentic self—when no one really and truly knows you at all. Believe you me, it's better to have five folks genuinely like the real you than 100 folks praise the version that is fake AF. You're grown. It's your decision. But man, I hope you'll choose what's behind Door #1. It's amazingly freeing in that space.
2. Your Connections Consist Mostly of Online Ones
A couple of years back, Entrepreneurpublished the article, "Why Everyone and Everything on Social Media Is Fake". I chuckled because it really is a trip, how much people will speak so confidently about individuals they only interact with online. It's also fascinating how people have a real knack for presenting themselves one way on IG and a completely different way in real life.
Case in point. I recently saw someone—someone who has a pretty big Twitter following—make the announcement that they no longer were going to share their personal business because people don't agree with their choices and the stress has caused them to go to therapy. It's been a while since I've had my own social media accounts, but do you get how imbalanced you can get if you spend a lot of time caring about people who you don't even really know? This person got to the point where they regretted revealing parts of their true selves simply because a lot of their random followers took issue with it. Y'all, when it gets to the point where either 1) you only present what you think people want to see online and/or 2) you shy away from being the real you because you care more about "likes" than you do about being at peace with your own self, it's time to take a social media fast or consider getting offline altogether, so that you can devote more time to cultivating real friendships.
Social media has its place. At the same time, it shouldn't be your only interaction with human beings. Actually, I don't think it should be your main one either. I don't care if it's Twitter, Instagram or Clubhouse (whew, that Clubhouse, chile), don't get caught up in the hype of keeping up with how folks present themselves online or thinking that you've got to keep up with the online Joneses. Just like the filter on a lot of those pictures are fake, so is how a lot of people present themselves—this includes how they oftentimes choose to interact with you.
3. Everyone Gets Talked About—Just Not in Their Face
Something else that grandma used to say is, "If they'll gossip to you, they will gossip about you." While that might not be 100 percent accurate (because I actually don't know one person who doesn't gossip on some level; media basically wouldn't exist without it), it's a good thing to keep in mind in the sense that, if you're someone who is constantly talking about people, only to act totally different in their presence, that is the ultimate kind of fakeness.
In fact, I'll give you a true life confession on this. For years, I was perceived as rude because it is absolutely not my modus operandi to act as if I like you and/or things are all good if I don't and/or they're not. I'm just not the kind of person to fake the funk. So, what I've had to work on is accepting that not being someone's fan doesn't mean that I've got to make people feel super uncomfortable or even be impolite. Hmm, come to think about it, about 85 percent of my inner circle has this particular trait in common. While I get that this personality trait isn't for everyone, I actually like it because, at least, I know where I stand—at least, I don't have to wonder if they're being one way in my presence and another way out of it. And neither do they.
Anyway, please don't give yourself any brownie points if you're the person who complains, gripes or speaks ill of folks when they're not around but then you pull the "Hey girl!" approach when they're within earshot of you. If you've got a real issue with someone, it's not going to get resolved if you're not honest and upfront with them about how you feel. Also, if you're someone who is just disingenuous in this way, eventually, even your own crew is gonna wonder if you're always like this…and that wondering could turn into socially distancing themselves from you at some point. It won't be due to COVID-19 either.
There is nothing admirable about acting one way in people's faces and another way behind their back. Figure out how to make peace or address the issue. If you don't want to be fake, you can't really do both.
4. You Care More About Others’ Expectations than Your Own Needs
Ever meet a relational chameleon? Those are what I call individuals who are one way with you and yet a completely different person with others. Matter of fact, it's kind of a toss-up when it comes to who they are gonna be at any given moment. While on the surface, that might sound like the definition of a person who is a bit off of their rocker, I've personally seen it enough in my lifetime to think it's more like someone who is A) unsure of who they truly are; B) an opportunist and/or C) more concerned about what others expect from them than what they need to receive in their relationships.
Being the kind of individual who meets the needs of others isn't a bad thing. It really isn't. Yet if you are so focused on making others happy that you suffer and/or you have no idea what your needs are and/or those needs are constantly shifting based on what you think people believe you should ask of them—while this may seem like a selfless thing on the surface, it's actually another form of fakeness.
I know a guy who's a huge relational chameleon. For instance, the way he acts around white people is completely different than how he acts around us (Black folks). He also lets a lot of BS slide with white people while being much harder on his Black friends. Know what else? He overextends for white folks because those are the ones he does the most business with. Meanwhile, he thinks that they "like" him when it's really more like they enjoy how much they are able to use him.
No relationship is healthy if only one person is doing most of the work. And something is up with the over-giving individual who doesn't confront this issue at some point. Bottomline, it's fake to constantly change yourself in order to please others. Decide what you need and be consistent with your expectations of them being met. Period.
5. You’ve Got Unhealthy Habits Because None of Your Relationships Fulfill You
One of the things that I didn't see being a benefit of the abstinence journey that I've been on is realizing that, although I consider myself to have a pretty healthy sex drive (so did my partners, if I do say so myself), I also realize that some men got what they absolutely did not deserve. It was because I used sex (and my sexual performance) as a way of escape. "Escape" in the sense that if I wasn't getting what I wanted or needed from them outside of the bedroom, I would lie to myself and say that was happening in the bed was more than enough. Lying to yourself is a really unhealthy habit. It can also cause you to be in some of the fakest relationships around.
Are you constantly doing most of the work in your relationships, hoping that they will like you more? Do you not speak up when you feel taken for granted because you don't want to "stir the pot"? Do you find yourself acting like certain things are "fine" when they absolutely aren't because you fear being alone if you speak up? Listen, when you are in a relationship, of any kind, that is making the core of who you are worse rather than better, sometimes to the point where you don't even really know who you are anymore, this is a sign of faking it that is problematic—and counterproductive—AF. It's a bad habit that you need to break ASAP.
The relationships that you can truly exhale in are the ones where you know you aren't overextending yourself or compromising to the point of sacrificing, just to keep them around. Your tribe wouldn't want you to be unhealthy just to keep them happy. Remember that as you interact with others.
6. If You Died Today, No One Could Say They Knew the REAL You
There's a guy I know who is awesome. Like, a really great guy. I don't know one person who would say otherwise and I've known him for well over two decades at this point. Here's the thing, though (and I've actually said it to him directly)—if he were to suddenly pass away today, even he said that probably only his brother could do his eulogy any justice when it comes to the details of his life—and he's been married for years. Why is that? Because no one really knows much beyond the surface.
It's not like he's shady or anything. It's more that he is so used to everyone thinking that he's the greatest person ever that he keeps up polite walls so that folks won't be disappointed. Lord, what a lonely existence at the end of the day because, is it worth it for everyone to so-call love you when they've only skimmed the surface?
A wise person once said, "If everyone likes you, everyone doesn't know you." One way to look at this is, none of us are everyone's "fit" and that's OK. Yet if you're so busy trying to seem like you are every person's ideal, you can find yourself never putting your guard down and letting others in. As a result, while your relationships may be pleasant, they still aren't very real.
I once read a post that said, "Being fake is the new trend and everyone is in style." While unfortunately, there may be a certain amount of truth to this, is it really worth it to not be your true self? That's not a rhetorical question. The answer is, it's not.
You've only got one life. You can be fake. You can be real. Choose wisely. You and your relationships are depending on it.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
We have less than 40 days left in 2024, and while I'm not one to rush goals just because it's the end of the year, it can be fun to challenge yourself to think about ways you'll close out this year big.
Whether you're planning to meet a certain financial or fitness goal, or you're simply trying to maintain and build on the progress you made this year, having something to look forward to is always a good look. Setting actual goals, according to research, actually leads to more success than just playing things by ear. So here are a few to get you started, sis:
(Disclaimer: Not everything is for everyone, so do like my Granny always says: "Eat the meat. Spit out the bone." Take on five out of the 40 and focus on that for the remainder of the year, or do them all. Either way, this is just to get you started.)
40 Ways To End The Year Strong and Inspired
Money Moves
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1. Increase your retirement (or other savings/investment) contributions by 1%.
Experts have found that you could be leaving money on the table by not upping your contributions when you can.
2. Cancel two to five subscriptions.
You could be missing hundreds, even thousands, of dollars a year due to sneaky price hikes and "updates."
3. Create a "fun" in a high-yield savings account.
This is especially important if you struggle with the dreaded b-word (budget) and will make next year's efforts a lot less intimidating. Even if it's $10 a month, do it.
4. Put on your big-girl panties, and set up automatic transfers and payments for at least one bill.
It reduces the stress of managing bills, lessens the chance of a missed payment---and the fees that come with that---and there can be cost savings for doing so.
5. Invest in a cleaner or housekeeping service.
Bosses who value their time (and mental health) invest their dollars into areas where the time they'd spend doing those tasks themselves could be better used to focus on other money-making projects. (And yes, rest is part of that.) Get a housekeeper, sis, or drop off that laundry, even if it's once per month.
6. Donate to a charity.
Beyond the tax benefits, it's a win-win for the greater good of communities you care about.
7. Review your insurance policies and negotiate a better rate (or move on) before their end dates.
Experts often agree this is a small but mighty step to take each year, especially since insurance rates are competitive, you could be spending more money than you need to (or not enough) and your insurance rates can affect your mortgage payments.
8. Call your loan provider and refinance.
As interest rates fall, “millions of borrowers may be able to refinance and get more affordable payments. As interest rates eased down to 6.5%, about 2.5 million borrowers could already refinance and save at least 75 basis points (0.75%) on their interest rate,” the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau reports. You can also refinance student and other types of loans.
9. Stop buying individual items and stock up via going bulk.
Research has found that, among 30 common products, buying in bulk could save you 27% compared with buying in lower quantities. Water, paper products, and baby products like diapers, toiletries, and garbage bags are the top items where people see the most cost-effectiveness. (This has been a lifesaver for me—children, large family, or not—especially when it comes to toothpaste, deodorant, toilet paper, and feminine hygiene products, saving stress, time, and money.)
10. Go cash-only for the holidays.
If you set smart goals and stick to limits on things like gifts, going out to eat, or groceries, you'll see the benefits of this. Cash-stuffing is one method recommended, but something as simple as taking a $10 bill out for lunch, disabling that card for an hour, and leaving your card in a safe place at the office can give you that mindset jump start to see how far you can take your money without the need to splurge.
Love And Romance
11. Say "no."
There are clear mental and physical health benefits to saying no including the setting of healthy boundaries, creating time and energy for other self-care activities, and protecting yourself from physically harmful situations (i.e. unprotected sex or abuse). Just say it, clearly and simply, when you need to.
12. Set a fun, free, adults-only date night for once a week or twice a month with your spouse.
If busy, high-profile folk have touted the success of this, even you can make the time for quality time with your partner. And it's even better when it costs nothing. The best connections are made doing something chill, challenging, or outside the usual dinner-and-a-movie date. Play a game that allows you to reconnect, take a walk in your neighborhood to chat and laugh, or try a little erotic chocolate/edible liquid/paint episode a la Mea Culpa.
13. Go out with Mr. or Ms. "Not My Type."
I love my man, but if I were waiting out for my "type" at the time, we wouldn't be celebrating seven (going on eight) years together. Sometimes having strict, unrealistic expectations for a spouse (especially related to things like height, physical features, or career path) is what's keeping you alone and lonely.
Take the pressure off and explore all your options. I'm not telling you to stop popping the balloon on the guy who earns $20,000 less than you if that's a hard no that Jesus himself told you to skip. I'm asking you to explore other options and see what else God might have out there for your love journey.
14. Immediately apologize and pray together.
I've learned that always being "right" isn't always ideal when you truly care about someone and you're in a relationship for the long haul. Defaulting to an apology when necessary, even when things aren't 100% resolved, is a good way to prioritize peace and save your energy for more worthwhile battles. Research has even supported the benefits of apologies in relationships, and how couples married for five or more years do it often.
15. Get a Rose and discover true self-love.
Do I really have to explain this? You've gotta know what satisfies you, and how better to figure that out than to practice self-love in the bed by yourself? You can also try this with a partner, but as a woman who got on this train very much later in my sexual activity journey. I have a lot more learning to do on my own, and even in a satisfying relationship, I like to find out new things about myself, by myself.
Figure out what you're into, watch what you want to watch, and read what you want to read to define pleasure for yourself. There's a freedom and empowering element there especially if you're used to prioritizing pleasing your partner.
16. Be direct and have the "money talk" with bae.
Money issues are one of the leading causes of divorce, so you need to have those conversations before you even think about marrying someone. And true, nobody can predict the future so you won't be able to avoid some challenges altogether, however, talking with your potential spouse about how they view money, their spending habits, and the pain points in terms of their approach to money management can at least give you a glimpse into what's in store if you do walk down the aisle, move in with them, or decide to share a bank account/business/child with them.
17. Invest in the "paid" version of that dating app.
I know plenty of successful, married folk who did this and met "the one" as a result. Let's be honest: The free version is for playing around. I had a lot of fun with my "free" profile back in the day, trust me. Upgrade that photo, profile, and package, and see if the quality of your dating adventures changes when you're serious about finding a true partner. Dating coaches and matchmakers cosign this.
18. Solo travel to meet that long-distance connection.
Sometimes, your perfect match isn't within 100 miles of you, and that's okay. Make it an adventure, enjoy the memories, and book that ticket. I met my man this way and it's been a whirlwind escape ever since. If you're not comfortable traveling solo, travel or (network to plan travel) with a group via Facebook.
Career And Business
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19. Schedule coffee or virtual meetups with smart people from your graduating class, previous employer, or current employer.
I have gotten many freelance opportunities by doing this. It's as simple as connecting and offering value (or simply learning how you can better equip yourself to do so.) It's also a great way to expand your network, spark new friendships, or find out about new job opportunities.
20. Invest in a well-made suit.
I don't care what industry you're in, a suit says "power," and it's not as old-school or out-of-style as you'd think. Plus the whole experience of looking for a new one (or getting one tailored) is fun and affirming. Try these options. I swear, anytime I wear a blazer, I'm treated like a celebrity or boss, especially when traveling. I was once upgraded to first-class wearing a yellow blazer outfit, and the airline professional literally said, "You look like somebody important. Here you go."
21. Volunteer for a worthwhile project or cause that's important to your company.
If you're overworked and underappreciated, skip this one, but if you truly have the time, love what you do, and want to advance, this move is clutch. Volunteering for extra projects got me where I am today in media because I had foresight, and knew that was the only way at the time to leverage relationships, and I was able to challenge myself to learn skills that 20 years later are still bankable. That VP you can't get a meeting with will be at that gala your company is planning, so join that committee, sis.
22. Write down why you deserve a raise and ask for it in your next one-on-one.
Gather those receipts (ie sales increase numbers, KPIs met, deals closed, people acquired via recruitment, the impact of systems updates, or other tangible success metrics) and ask for that raise before the first or second-quarter budgets are being finalized.
23. Instead of quitting, write down your exit plan.
While revenge quitting is set to be a thing next year (and maybe you're among those who will be leading the trend), try the better boss move and quit with a real plan.
24. Start automatically separating that estimated self-employed quarterly tax estimate.
If you have side hustles (or you're collecting 1099 income,) baby, you do not want to neglect those quarter tax payments. Talk to a professional, do your research, and set up automatic transfers to an account specifically for paying these at the appropriate due dates.
25. Sign up for a free one- to 11-week course related to your industry—or the industry you want to be in next year.
Institutions like Harvard University and platforms like Coursera offer free courses that can enhance your skills. You can also invest in certificate courses with accredited colleges as well as tech training.
26. Hit "Easy Apply" for 10 dream jobs listed on LinkedIn.
While you shouldn't solely rely on this when actively job-seeking, using this convenient LinkedIn option is a great way to get into the habit of applying for positions. And if you're already employed, you should still be "dating" other employers if you're looking to make a move in the next six months. Keep your interview skills sharp, practice toughening up for the "nos," and get a bit of an ego boost in the process.
Self-Care And Wellness
27. Pre-schedule three month's worth of massages.
Oftentimes this is cost-effective since some spas offer deals for multiple bookings. Also, it makes an act of self-care deliberate and important, not an option. When you get that reminder call, you'll know it's real.
28. Fire that therapist and try another one.
Cultural competency in mental health support is one major problem that can hinder Black women from even bothering with therapy. And who wants the added stress of spending multiple, paid sessions explaining why something is a microaggression? Cut the cord and move on to try someone else, either via a Black women therapists channel or recommendations from others.
29. Join a small group at church.
Bedside service ain't gonna cut it and neither is going to the usual Sunday service. Join a smaller group and upgrade your efforts to connect, network, and elevate spiritually. Even if virtually, take a step to dig a bit deeper with more targeted Bible study and discussions.
30. Say no, even to loved ones.
This is on here twice, for a reason. Saying no is the simplest, most powerful micro-action you can take today to make 2025 better. No explanations. No guilt. Say no.
31. Choose one "luxury" beauty product for skincare and stick to it.
This was trending big on social, especially for millennials hitting their 40s. There's just something so freeing about not giving in to every trend and sticking to the basics that work, especially when there are quality, healthy ingredients involved. Put those orders on auto-renew.
32. Sign up for a new sport or fitness class just for fun, not for results.
It's great to be on a weight-loss or weight-lifting journey, but try something just for the fun of it. Switch things up with a couple of these fitness activities.
33. Book a staycation.
Leave the passport at home and explore a nearby community or another town in your state. There's so much enrichment in your own backyard right here in the U.S., and you don't even have to break the bank.
34. Pre-schedule your mammograms, Pap smear, and peri-menopause checkups for next year.
Take control of your health by pre-scheduling essential appointments like mammograms, Pap smears, and peri-menopause check-ups for 2025. Prioritizing these screenings early ensures you stay on top of your wellness and make time for self-care in the new year.
35. Cut off support of beauty and wellness professionals whose customer service is below standard.
This is another one that many Black women have been vocal about—from unrealistic pre-appointment requirements, to booking fees, to long waits, to unsavory in-salon experiences. Spot the red flags early, and just stop accommodating foolishness. Support salons or experienced stylists who are kind, have proper systems in place and value your time.
36. Schedule five to 10-minute moments of silence on your calendar.
Again, wellness is not optional, and if it's not on my calendar, it's not official. Sit quietly. Pray. Meditate. Or do nothing. The benefits of silent moments are almost endless.
37. Download a meditation app.
If you've found that meditation is difficult to schedule or to even start, an app can help. Try this, this, or this one, and take that step to embrace something new to enhance your wellness routine. If you're tired of downloading apps, create a playlist for meditation via Amazon Music or Spotify and schedule a reminder to do it once a day or week.
38. Invest in a healthy meal prep or delivery service.
Time is emotionally expensive, so save as much of it as possible. Getting into meal prep to keep to your goals is a great way to save time, stress, and effort. The health benefits of meal prepping have also been proven via research.
39. Create a positive playlist on Spotify, Amazon Music, YouTube, or other streaming platform.
It can be podcasts, music, affirmations, or somatic sounds. It's a game-changer. You can even set an alarm to wake you up to start your day with the positive playlist. Not into creating your own? There are plenty to choose from with a quick search.
40. Set up reminders for Alexa (Siri or other AI) to remind you, "You are loved," and "You are okay."
This simple effort can boost your endorphins and remind you that you're indeed, not alone, and you will be okay, regardless. To set mine up, I simply commanded, "Alexa, remind me everyday 'Jesus loves me,'" and like clockwork she does. She almost scared the ish out of me one day when I'd forgotten the reminder was active, but it was the reminder I needed when anxiety had gotten the best of me that week.
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A new year begins, as the stars remind us that their dance never ends. The Astrological forecast of 2025 is set to bring forth many changes regarding love, finances, personal growth, and more, and we have come up with the perfect guide to help you navigate the year ahead. Whether you are thinking of changing careers, looking for ways to develop health-wise, planning a wedding, or looking for a sign for love, this is your go-to guide for all of the above.
In numerology, 2025 is a 9 Universal Year—all about culmination, growth, humanity, dignity, and change.
The energy of the year is about wrapping things up, tying up loose ends, and completing one cycle or phase in your life. We close the door to one experience or way of being and enter a new one. A 9 Year pushes us to change and also invites us to nourish in the abundance that has come from such change and efforts.
Astrology’s Blueprint for 2025: Let Go, Level Up, and Thrive
There will be a lot of letting go this year, but these are necessary transitions as we focus on what is essential and a true priority for our lives right now. For those who are Life Path 9s, this will be a significant year for you, when life comes full circle and changes for the better. Next year is overall about letting go, culmination, growth, and being the master of your reality.
YOUR 2025 KEY ASTROLOGICAL INSIGHTS
THE BEST TIME OF THE YEAR FOR LOVE
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January 2, 2025 - February 4, 2025: Venus In Pisces
Venus is exalted in Pisces, and magic comes through in love. This is the time to believe in miracles and to envision what your heart wants right now. Keeping an open mind and heart is key, as the possibilities of love unfold for you. Emotions are running high, and people are looking to connect and build new relationships right now.
June 6, 2025 - July 4, 2025: Venus in Taurus
When Venus is in Taurus, Venus is home. Venus is the planet of love, security, and romance, and is the planetary ruler of Taurus. During this transit, love matters take shape more strongly, and there is a sense of stability blooming now.
This is the perfect time to go on a date, put yourself out there, or treat someone special with something special.
Love is the vibe right now, and this is the time of the year when romance is high. This is also a great time of the year for wedding bells or engagements.
October 21, 2025: New Moon In Libra
A New Moon in Virgo signifies a new beginning in love. New doors open and new chapters begin, and not only is this a good time to experience love, but it’s also a great time to manifest it.
Love may surprise you right now, as the New Moon aligns with the Sun and Venus currently in Libra as well.
Partnerships matters are experiencing a breakthrough, and expect the good energy you’ve been putting out to be coming back to you right now. Write down lists of intentions for your new beginning in love right now, and let your blessings come to you.
November 6, 2025 - November 30, 2025: Venus In Scorpio
Venus in Scorpio brings passion and intimacy to love. During this time, you can see relationships take it to the next level, and more commitment being nurtured here. Venus in Scorpio doesn’t want superficial love- it wants the real thing, and that’s the energy you are getting right now. This is the perfect time of the year to cuddle up with your boo and plan a special night with just you two. Venus in Scorpio transforms love and makes it more concrete.
BEST TIME OF THE YEAR FOR TRAVEL
June 26, 2025 - July 18, 2025: Mercury In Leo
This is a good time of the year to travel, and do something that makes you happy. The focus right now is on your pleasure, your joy, and the excitement your heart is looking for right now. The vibes are high with Mercury in Leo, and this is a good time to put yourself first and have some fun.
This is a good time to take a trip before Mercury will be Retrograde in Leo from July 18 - Aug. 11, making travel plans more chaotic after this period.
September 13, 2025 - November 15, 2025: Vesta In Sagittarius
Vesta in Sagittarius helps us step outside our comfort zone. This is the time of year when people are more inspired to travel, as the energy is high for adventure.
This is the perfect time to embrace your inner free spirit and take a risk.
Dedicate yourself to your passions, and be prepared to learn something new in your explorations. This is a time to travel with good company, have fun, and gain a new perspective.
December 19, 2025: New Moon In Sagittarius
This New Moon in Sagittarius is a good time of the year for travel matters, and this is also a good time to set your intentions for travel matters you want to see through but haven’t gotten to yet. When the Moon is in Sagittarius, emotions are high and so are the possibilities. Surprise opportunities for travel may fall into your lap right now, and this is a good time to go after the things you want. If you have the opportunity to travel, this is the perfect time to go to a new place or explore a new location.
BEST TIME OF THE YEAR FOR CAREER
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February 4, 2025 - June 9, 2025: Jupiter In Gemini
This is Jupiter's final leg in Gemini for the next decade or so, and Jupiter in Gemini is great for making new business connections, coming up with new ideas, and getting projects done. Jupiter in Gemini things big and doesn’t doubt or judge the ideas it comes up with. This is the time to bring creative and exciting energy into your career and push forth your efforts, especially if you have a career revolving around communication, social media, travel, writing, or publication.
April 27, 2025: New Moon In Taurus
This New Moon is a great time of the year to set your intentions for your career and your financial world. A New Moon in Taurus aligns you with your desires and helps you see concrete steps you can take to get there right now.
Whatever you have been patient for in career matters is coming to fruition for you now, and this is also a good time for seeing past efforts manifest into success for you.
Write a list of the financial and professional accomplishments you want to see come true for you this year and remember that you are worth every bit of it.
December 15, 2025 - January 23, 2026: Mars In Capricorn
Mars in Capricorn helps us develop in our careers, and also be recognized for our skills and talents. This is a great time to go after a promotion, ask for a raise, or see a level up in your career. Professional matters come full circle around this time, and the things you are known for here are coming to the surface now. Mars in Capricorn brings the passion and the energy needed to succeed.
BEST TIME OF THE YEAR TO MOVE
February 23, 2025 - April 18, 2025: Mars Direct In Cancer
Mars will be direct in Cancer for a little over a month, after being retrogade here at the start of the year. With Mars now direct, any initiatives you have been looking to set in regards to the home, family, and your foundations, are more likely to succeed right now. This is a good time to gain some more stability in your life, revamp the home, or move into a safer, or more nourishing environment. Mars in Cancer understands the importance of personal needs and emotional well-being and helps us align with what you need to feel safe.
June 9, 2025 - November 11, 2025: Jupiter Direct In Cancer
Jupiter enters Cancer for the next year and will be direct for five months out of the year. During these five months, this is one of the best times in over a decade, to see blessings happening within matters of the home. Many people will be moving homes, locations, and cities, during this time, and with expansive Jupiter involved, a lot of these changes are creating something bigger and better for you. This is the time to figure out what home means to you and to see your blessings expand here.
BEST TIME OF THE YEAR FOR HEALTH
May 18, 2025: Jupiter Sextile Chiron
This is a significant time for healing, and seeing the blessings that come from it. Jupiter in Gemini Sextiles Chiron in Aries, and the insights you can gain now will help you see the bigger picture in health matters. This is a time for feeling more inspired to take care of yourself and heal, and seeing more immediate benefits for doing so. This is healing on a broad scale, and some powerful events in health matters can occur for you now.
June 17, 2025 - August 6, 2025: Mars In Virgo
Mars in Virgo marks a time of new development in health. Mars gets things done in Virgo, and a lot of these initiatives will be taking place when it comes to the body, daily routine, and lifestyle. This is a good time to commit to a new health regime or practice and to find new ways to take care of yourself. You have more energy and stamina to take care of your health, and the initiatives you take will benefit you overall right now.
THE BEST TIME OF THE YEAR TO MAKE A CHANGE
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January 2, 2025 - March 21, 2025: Vesta In Scorpio
This energy embraces change. Vesta in Scorpio represents your commitment and responsibilities, and in Scorpio, helps us readdress and acknowledge ours. This is the time of the year to look at what you have planned for yourself, to rewrite or to recommit where needed, and a lot of this has to do with the inner work. The changes that benefit now, are coming internally, and where you want to devote more of your passions, time, and self.
August 11, 2025: Saturn Sextile Uranus
Saturn Retrograde in Aries forms a Sextile to Uranus in Gemini, and this is the time to shock people with the changes you are making right now.
Change is favored during this time, as there is more support for not only seeing your goals through but also making something out of them that helps you succeed in the long run.
With Saturn, the planet of long-term planning, forming a harmonious Sextile with Uranus, the planet of sudden changes, you are supported as you try something new right now.
August 23, 2025: New Moon In Virgo
A New Moon in Virgo encourages change and evolution. When the Moon is in Virgo we feel more inspired to make a positive change in our life, in also to experience “something better.” We are pushed to face where things have been out of place or disruptive, and Virgo helps us get things right. This is a great time of year to make a new plan or set a new initiative, and to do what is going to benefit you in the long run.
September 22 - November 4: Mars In Scorpio
Mars in Scorpio is all about transformation. During this time of the year, motivation is high to overcome a challenge or a fear, and we are more willing to do so now. Mars in Scorpio energy brings the courage we may need to make an important change in our lives and helps us feel confident enough to do so. Mars in Scorpio is driven to overcome and evolve and there is a lot of support to do so right now.
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