"Relationship goals" is a term that is thrown around way too loosely these days. Mostly because there's levels to that shit, ladies. Buying an overpriced purse or shoe isn't a goal. Going on a vacation isn't a goal. And eating at some fancy place isn't a goal. Yes, each of these are nice, and yes, they all create memories for the two of you, butttttt you can do all the above with--or for--anybody.
The real goal comes from investing in your partner's aspirations.
Hear me out.
Black Panther director Ryan Coogler knows a thing or two about blockbusters AND relationship goals. In 2013, he was included on Time's list of the "30 People Under 30 Changing the World". His work has been hailed by critics for centering on often overlooked cultures and characters—most notably Black people. He has frequently collaborated with actor Michael 'Bae' Jordan, who has appeared in all of his feature films. And in 2018, he was named the runner-up of Time's "Person of the Year".
GiphyBasically, he only looks to bring the culture forward--that is his passion. And with mega movies such a Fruitvale Station, Creed, and Space Jam: A New Legacy all under his belt, we can see this clear as day. After all, Black Panther has grossed $1.3 BILLION worldwide.
But if you ask Coogler, himself, he'll tell you that he owes it all to his wife, Zinzi Evans.
Back when Coogler was just a college student, playing football, and gearing up to fall back on going to medical school if becoming an athlete didn't work out, one of his teachers encouraged him to take up screenwriting, which he fell in love with. But as a broke college kid, he didn't have the resources to properly do the work. So instead, he'd type up scripts in Microsoft Word, which he described to the Ebro in the Morning radio show, as "impossible".
"But then my wife, she was my girl at the time, they had a software where you could write screenplays. I was trying to write in Microsoft Word. It's impossible because your format gotta be right. I was broke, playing football on the little scholarship money. And my wife scraped together some cheese and bought me Final Draft, which is the software that you write your movies on. And she got me that."
And since, the two have taken over Hollywood by partnering on projects, forming Proximity Media (production company), and signing lucrative heavyweight deals with Disney for television series. And although the power couple keep their private life under wraps, they welcomed their first child in 2019. The couple haven’t revealed the sex of the child yet, Coogler is on record hoping for a little girl….well, multiple girls, actually. He told The YBF:
"I found I want daughters real, real bad. Like plural. I thought, making 'Fruitvale Station', I want kids. But like, on this one, I have to have some daughters."
Or basically, more little women that he can pour into, thanks to his wife believing in him.
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So again, what are your relationship goals?
Featured image by DFree / Shutterstock.com
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Now, if you’re wondering why they look so familiar, it could be for a bunch of reasons. Jenna Nia is a fashion designer who has styled many of our favorite celebs, like Keke Palmer, Normani, Mel B, and more. Also, she previously appeared on BET’s College Hill: Interns and even made appearances in a few music videos back in the day. But now, she’s immersed herself in the world of business and media.
Donay is an entrepreneur with 10+ years of experience in various industries. However, while balancing his work life, the businessman still maintains a healthy balance with fitness, fashion – and, of course, family that he shares online. It’s clear the pair takes their work and passion seriously. But from this convo it’s clear that they took their union even more seriously. Check out xoNecole’s exclusive conversation with the beautiful couple below.
Jenna Nia and Donay
Courtesy
xoNecole: Let’s start off by you both telling me a little bit about yourselves.
Jenna Nia: I’m Jenna Nia. I just turned 39 in July, and I am from St. Louis, Missouri.
Donay: I’m Donay. I’m 39 years old and I’m also from St. Louis, Missouri, but we’ve been living in Atlanta for quite some time.
xoN: Oh, okay, you’re both from the same area! Is that how y'all met?
Jenna Nia: Yes, we actually met in high school at about 15. We didn’t go to the same school, but we had a lot of mutual friends. We used to see each other often because of our different circles of friends, and I had the biggest crush on him. I thought he was so kind, funny, and he had his own little car (laughs). But I had a lot of friends that had little “situations” with him. Plus, he had a girlfriend. So we never really hooked up then.
Donay: But I’d say we knew we liked each other. We were always looking at each other and playing games.
Jenna Nia: He didn’t give me any real attention though –
Donay: I paid her attention. But she had a boyfriend; it didn’t mean anything to me. I still checked her out, but she didn’t really take me seriously until around 18.
Jenna Nia: Then I realized all he wanted to do was smash and be a horny little boy. So we ended up reconnecting when I was around 25.
xoN: Wait, so how did it progress to what we see today?
Jenna Nia: I moved away, went to college, moved to Atlanta, and then came back to St. Louis for a holiday break. We ended up rekindling through the same mutual friends. We were all hanging out over someone’s house. The chemistry was natural, and we hooked up. Two weeks later, I ended up dumping my boyfriend at the time; we were engaged a few years later, and here we are – still together.
Donay: That’s it. She laid it out perfectly.
"We were all hanging out over someone’s house. The chemistry was natural, and we hooked up. Two weeks later, I ended up dumping my boyfriend at the time; we were engaged a few years later, and here we are – still together."
xoN: I love stories when stories end like that. But let’s back up a bit. Take me through the process. After reconnecting, how did things blossom? Did y’all have the “what are we” conversation? How did it develop from an attraction to a relationship? Talk to me about the courtship.
Donay: We were talking on the phone every day. Those phone conversations got deep, fast. We were long distance, but I was phoning her in the morning, calling her baby - all the things. I was trying to charm her. And a few weeks later, I was saying, ‘I love you.’
Jenna Nia and Donay
Courtesy
xoN: I’m hearing that more and more, actually. Sometimes what’s understood doesn’t have to be explained! What did being in such a serious relationship teach you?
Jenna Nia: I learned there was only one man who could make me want to be with him for the rest of my life. I realized it’s possible to be crazy in love and not have to weigh options.
xoN: What was it that he did to make you feel like that?
Jenna Nia: It was the chemistry, it was like magic. It was a feeling. It wasn’t even anything he did. Honestly, we had a rocky start. You know how it is, they charm you but then you start finding out all kinda other stuff.
We had infidelity issues when we were young. So logically, I wanted to leave him alone, but my heart and mind just wouldn’t allow me to. Once there was nothing I could do to stop being crazy about him – I knew.
xoN: And what was it for you, Donay?
Donay: It was from spending time with her. I just knew. I literally didn’t like when she wasn’t in my presence. I knew she was my wife.
"It was from spending time with her. I just knew. I literally didn’t like when she wasn’t in my presence. I knew she was my wife."
xoN: Okay, so you spoke a little bit about infidelity. What were some of your biggest challenges, and how did you navigate them?
Jenna Nia: He still doesn’t claim it, but I feel like he had a whole relationship he never told me about when we first got together. But we were only 25, and it was before we got married. It was him learning to be with one woman and in a serious relationship – it was truly growing pains.
Donay: Like I’ve told her before, I was young and knew I was playing with something serious. I knew how real she was and that what we had wasn’t something I could just find again.
xoN: You mentioned family, what are some of your other shared values?
Donay: I’d have to say our lifestyle.
Jenna Nia: That’s really the best way to sum it up. We both have the same craving for nice things, luxury, and financial freedom. When it comes to how we want to live our life, we’re both action-oriented and proactive to obtain that lifestyle.
xoN: This is everything. But I mean, do y’all fight? What are some of the things you argue over?
Donay: (Laughs) We both are very strong-minded.
Jenna Nia: We fight the most over business. We own our businesses together, and there's so many moving parts. Sometimes, we don’t agree over stuff or have different approaches. We don’t really have outside problems, though.
xoN: Finally, I’ll close with this. What are your favorite things about each other?
Jenna Nia: There’s a lot of things. He’s very much my eye candy. He’s a super Dad. He’s with the boys more than me. But overall, it’s his perspective on life. He’s extremely smart, but he also combines it with action. He’s going to make it happen. Everyone doesn’t always understand people who go that hard, but I do. It’s very sexy and makes me feel safe and protected.
Donay: First of all, she’s fine and beautiful; I can’t keep my hands off of her. But outside of that, it’s her mind, ambition, hustle, strength, and the way she thinks. I respect her mind so much. You don’t meet many people with a mind like hers.
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