Geeze. Although it might just be all up in my head, it sure does seem that, as soon as I had my last birthday this past June, my lips decided that they wanted to chap up more than usual. As I tried to go through the process of elimination to figure out why, although a bit of dehydration may have a little bit to do with it, I had to take into consideration that aging may have something to do with it too.
After all, as we get older, it gets harder for our lips to retain moisture, less collagen and elastin are produced in our lips, sometimes our lips end up appearing smaller/thinner and, because there is a decrease of blood vessels in our lips, they can lose some of their natural color too.
Yeah, even though having more years on this earth is indeed a blessing, that doesn’t mean we don’t go through quite a bit of transitioning, from head to toe.
And what if you just read all of that and immediately thought, I love my lips and I don’t want time to change them? Sis, I feel you. Believe me, I do. That’s why I want to share 10 things that you can do to, at best, keep your lips looking just like they do now and, at worst, get them to age far more gracefully than you would without these helpful recommendations.
10 Ways to Keep Your Lips Hydrated
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1. Exfoliate
No matter how old you are, it’s always going to be a wise move to exfoliate your lips on a weekly basis. Not only does it help to remove dry and dead skin (so that your lips end up looking less chapped), it can make your lips feel smoother, reduce the appearance of discoloration on them and it can help to increase hydration to your lips as well. Although you can actually use your toothbrush to exfoliate your lips (by rubbing your damp brush in small circular motions), there are also homemade lip scrubs that you can try. Healthline has 14 recipes that you can check out here.
2. Massage
When was the last time that you gave your lips a nice massage? By first applying a mixture of peppermint oil (no more than one drop) with a carrier oil like grapeseed, avocado, or sweet almond oil and then using your index fingers in a circular motion on your lips, you will increase blood circulation to them, help them to become more plump and full and they will become more rosy-looking too.
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3. Hydrate
If you’ve ever wondered why it seems like your lips get dried out faster and more often than any other part of your body, the main reason is because they don’t have any oil glands; this means that they require hydration from your system and then moisturization (from lip balms, lip gloss, lipstick) on the outside to keep them looking healthy. This is just one more reason why you need to drink no less than 4-6 glasses of water a day. Do you?
4. Consume Collagen
Did you know that collagen accounts for a whopping 30 percent of your body’s protein? And since it’s pretty well-documented that we lose collagen as we age, and that can impact our bone and joint health, how much muscle mass we have, and also how good our skin looks, you definitely need to check out, “We Lose Collagen As We Age. 10 Ways To Naturally Boost It.” If you do, your lips will be grateful because collagen helps to give them the fullness and definition that they have. So, if you haven’t been on top of your collagen intake as of late, here is some inspiration to do so.
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5. Give Your Lips Some Sun Protection
There is no part of your body that shouldn’t be protected from the sun, regardless of how much melanin you may have — including your lips. When it comes to your lips, specifically, if you don’t protect them from potentially damaging UV rays, not only do you put yourself at risk for having a skin cancer diagnosis, but your lips could end up drying out and aging faster than they are supposed to. That’s why it’s imperative that you coat your lips with a lip balm that contains SPF. For the record, jojoba oil and carrot seed oil can support your sun protection efforts too.
6. DIY Vitamin C Lip Balm
One of the best things that I’ve done for my skin over the past several months is to use vitamin C serum on a consistent basis. From providing hydration and reducing hyperpigmentation to boosting collagen production, brightening the skin and protecting skin from UV rays — vitamin C serum really is the truth. That said, if you want your lips to look youthful, I recommend making a lip balm; one that has some vitamin C in it. Although you can apply vitamin C serum directly to your lips, because it might be too strong, it’s actually better to go with a recipe that has citrus essential oil in it (like this one here, here, and here) or one that contains orange peel powder (like this one here).
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7. Treat Your Lips to Some Peptides
Peptides are amino acids that play a variety of roles within your system. As far as your skin goes, peptides are important because they help to create a barrier for your skin while also reducing fine lines and wrinkles, decreasing breakouts, and increasing elastin as well. For all of these reasons, I think that it’s a good idea to apply some peptides to your lips, at least a couple of times a week. These days, there are all types of peptide lip treatments to choose from. One article that provides a variety to test out is Harper BAZAAR’s “The 10 Best Peptide Lip Balms Worth the Hype.”
8. Use Avocado and Mango Body Butter
Although avocados are high in fat, they’re healthy fats (monounsaturated and polyunsaturated fats); ones that can help to lower your cholesterol levels. Not only that but avocados also contain lots of fiber, vitamins C, E, and K, folate, magnesium, and potassium, and they even have some omega-3 in them too. If you get this fruit in the form of avocado oil, you can get the same benefits from the fruit itself which is why I recommend that you either apply avocado oil directly on your lips or make some of your own avocado body butter.
If you blend some avocado oil along with some vitamin E oil (which helps the cells on your lips to turn over faster) and mango butter (which slows down skin age, repairs damaged skin tissue, and helps to protect your skin) and whip it together with a blender, you will end up with a whipped body butter that will work well on your skin and your lips too.
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9. Try Some Calendula Oil
Antibacterial, antifungal, and anti-inflammatory are all properties that calendula oil contains. And since research has indicated that it can help to protect your skin (by reducing the amount of oxidative stress that it encounters), this is why you might want to try it on your lips. Your lips will especially adore it since it can help to provide a barrier to your skin which could protect it from outdoor elements that could dry it (including your lips) out.
10. Apply an Aloe Vera and Honey Mixture at Night
If you don’t already have an aloe vera plant somewhere in your home, maybe this will get you to invest in one. Although it’s a plant that consists of 99 percent water, it also has nutrients in it like selenium, zinc, copper, manganese, magnesium, and fatty acids. These work together to speed up the healing process of minor cuts and wounds, heal sunburn, bring relief to dry skin, and even help with the inflammation and discomfort that are associated with eczema, psoriasis, and acne.
That said, since aloe vera is good at providing so much hydration, if you mix its gel with a drop of honey, the honey’s antimicrobial and anti-inflammatory properties will help to heal your lips by repairing any damaged tissues it may have. The combo is the perfect all-natural all-night lip treatment.
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Aging is coming — and there is nothing wrong with it. Yet if you can get your lips to look and feel wonderful during the aging process, that will make the adjustments so much easier to welcome.
After all, a sexy pair of lips? They are timeless.
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Let’s try and prevent that from ever happening again, y’all. One way to do that is to check out 12 hacks that are centered around how to be calmer, feel sexier, and become more present during your (next) first-time copulation — so that you can look back on it with all smiles and not one regret.
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1. Put Some Essential Oil on the Bedding
Doing things, beforehand, that will create the desired mood can already help to calm your nerves; that’s because it reminds you that you are not doing something flippantly or without giving it all some real thought — that what is about to transpire is intentional because you are choosing for it to be and that can be empowering in its own way. That said, if you’ve ever wondered if aromatherapy is more of a myth than anything else, there is science to support that when you take in certain scents, the part of your brain that regulates emotion is alerted and that creates certain responses.
In this case, since you want to decrease stress, it’s a good idea to apply essential oils like lavender, rose, patchouli, jasmine, cedarwood, mandarin, or ylang-ylang to your bedding. They all have a reputation for providing a relaxing effect.
2. Light Some Scented Soy Candles
If you’re thinking, “You sure do shout-out soy candles a lot” — you would be absolutely correct. When they are scented, they smell amazing and, because they are soy, they burn cleaner and longer. Plus, candlelight is soothing and romantic. Definitely, a perfect way to cultivate ambiance is with the help of some candles. By the way, vanilla, cinnamon, sandalwood, pumpkin, and ginger-scented ones are considered to be aphrodisiac ones…and you already know what that means. #wink
3. Pour Some Pure Fruit Juice into Some Wine Glasses
If you were thinking about taking a couple of shots of Casamigos in order to take some of the “edge” off, while it might give you a temporary liquid courage fix and could temporarily increase your sex drive, quite a bit of research states that alcohol can also put you on a bit of a roller coaster ride when it comes to being able to maintain natural lubrication and even being able to orgasm. That’s why you might want to go with some fruit juice instead.
Chuckle if you want to but orange juice increases blood circulation (which can intensify your orgasms), pomegranate juice raises testosterone levels in both men and women and apple juice is a phytoestrogen drink that can help increase lubrication — and you know what they say: the wetter, the better!
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4. Try a Teaspoon of Honey (or Chocolate)
For the record, when it comes to this tip, I’m not talking about those honey packets that are all over social media (check out “Those (Sex) Honey Packets Have A Lot Of Hype. Here’s The Truth About ‘Em.”). I mean, the kind of honey that you get at the grocery store — like the one that is in teddy bear bottles by the jellies (the real ones know). And although I personally think that honey can — eh hem — make the night go better on a few different levels (check out “12 'Sex Condiments' That Can Make Coitus Even More...Delicious”), my recommendation for taking in a teaspoon before anything gets started has nothing to do with your libido. Well, not exactly.
You might be surprised to know that honey contains compounds that can help to calm your nervous system as it helps to reduce your anxiety levels. Come to think of it, the flavonoids in dark chocolate can have a similar effect. So, if you want a sweet way to reduce the butterflies, honey and dark chocolate are scientifically proven methods.
5. Watch a Comedy
Sex for the first time is a serious decision — yes. But does the entire evening need to be serious? Absolutely not. In fact, it might surprise you to know that laughter not only reduces anxiety levels, but research also reveals that people who are able to take a joke, can laugh at themselves and like to have fun during intimacy, they end up having far more satisfying sex lives than those who don’t.
So, if what you need is a bit of an icebreaker, watch a funny movie or television show. It can definitely help to take some of the edge off and make you both feel more comfortable with getting even more comfortable in each other’s space later on.
6. (Slow) Dance Together
Listen, any time that I can reference some '90s R&B, I’m gonna do it without any kind of hesitation or apology and, when it comes to this tip, the song that immediately came to mind was Tony! Toni! Toné!’s “Slow Wine.” Dancing close to someone who you’re attracted to while listening to songs that are your fave? That’s automatically a comforting thought (and action). And yes, there is scientific evidence to support that dancing can help to reduce stress while giving you a boost of the feel-good hormone dopamine. So…where’s your slow jam playlist?
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7. Do Some Reflexology or Give Each Other a Hand Massage
If dancing isn’t really your thing, another option is to get into some novice-level reflexology (foot therapy) or to give each other a hand massage. By touching certain parts of the feet, you can reduce anxiety and increase energy levels. One way that this works is reflexology helps to stimulate the production of endorphins so that you can feel less stressed. Same goes with hand massages.
If you’d like to give either of these a shot, warm up a mixture of the essential oil that you used for your bedding with a carrier oil (check out “So, Here Are The Carrier Oils That Will Take Your Sex Life To A Whole 'Nother Level”) and then take turns rubbing each other’s feet and/or hands. For tips on how to give a good foot massage, go here. A hand massage? Look here.
8. Implement the ‘333 Rule’…with a Twist
If your mind only seems to race, no matter what you do, you can always try what is known as the “333 Rule.” All you need to do is look around and identify three objects, then three sounds, and then move three body parts. Although the method to the madness is still being figured out, it is believed that by taking the focus off of your feelings and briefly placing them onto other things, that can help you to feel less anxious. Hey…you never know until/unless you try. Right?
9. Talk It Out
I’m gonna be really real with you: if you’re too uncomfortable to tell your partner that you’re nervous about having sex with them — why are you planning to have sex with them in the first place? After all, no matter how vulnerable you may feel, nothing tops getting naked with someone and allowing them to enter into your body (just sayin’). That’s why, it’s more than pkay to be open, honest, and genuine about what’s going through your mind before anything ever happens (so long as you are also kind, tactful, and speaking to them in the way that you would like to be spoken to).
In fact, if you need some help “breaking the ice” in this way, consider asking — and answering — the following questions:
- What are you the most concerned or nervous about?
- Do you feel comfortable in this environment?
- What’s your favorite part about foreplay and sex?
- What are your erogenous zones?
- Do you have any particular expectations?
- What’s your biggest turn-on and sex-related pet peeve?
- Is there something new that you’d like to try?
- Should we come up with a safe word?
- Are you a cuddler or nah?
- Do you believe that we’re ready?
Remember, sex is a form of communication, so it’s encouraged to communicate about sex before it transpires. That’s because, the more you know about each other mentally, the easier it will be to enjoy each other…physically/sexually.
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10. Have No Agenda
If you’re going into the evening on some, “And I’m going to be the best that he ever had” or “I already know that this is going to be the best night ever” — no wonder you’re so stressed out. Putting high expectations onto anything, including sex, is a surefire way to end up thinking too hard, trying too hard, or ending up super disappointed. Hmph. Off-topic yet not, I still can’t believe that the people who played on-again-off-again lovebirds Dylan McKay (Luke Perry) and Brenda Walsh (Shannen Doherty) on the original Beverly Hills, 90210 are no longer with us.
Yet as I was thinking about this tip, something that Dylan said before their first time came to mind: “We’re not going to be judging each other up there. We’re going to be enjoying each other.” And y’all, that is exactly the mindset to have before having sex with someone, in real life, for the first time. If that is not the resolve that the two of you are able to come to? Red flag.
11. Kiss. A LOT.
When it comes to the topic of kissing, there are two things that I’m gonna be quick to say. One is, you can’t just be out here sharing your mouth with any and everybody (check out “Can You Actually Get An STI/STD From Kissing? Yes. And No.”). The second is a kiss? A really good, long, and passionate kiss? Chile, while doing that…bad nerves…where (check out “This Valentine's Day, Get Into Some Really Sexy 'Erotic Kissing'”)???
You can thank science for that too because kissing stimulates the bonding hormone oxytocin, it helps you to decide if you are sexually compatible with someone (no joke and also check out “What Exactly Does It Mean To Be Sexually Compatible?”) and it also produces endorphins that help you to relax and feel really good at the same time.
12. Stay in the Moment
Author Eckhart Tolle once said, “Wherever you are, be there totally.” When it comes to having sex with someone for the first time, if you’re overthinking, you can’t be totally with them. If you’re turning sex into a “performance” instead of an opportunity to simply enjoy the presence of the person you are with, you can’t be totally with them. If you’re worried about the ending before anything has even begun, you can’t be totally with them.
So yes, above all of the other hacks that I’ve mentioned here, determine in your mind to embrace the moment and stay there. If you and your partner go into the experience with this intention, each shared minute of time, taken as they come, can be special, calming, and memorable — just the way a first time should be.
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