As a part of our Friday Nights, Saturday Mornings feature, we're talking to some of our favorite boss ladies about their weekends, their way. How do they relax, recharge and refuel? As we all know, life shouldn't be all about work. It's what we do beyond business and career that help keep us motivated and able to dominate for the week ahead.
Meet Jovian Zayne - an international speaker, coach, and founder of the OnPurpose Movement®. Here Jovian reflects on why self-care is so important and why taking time to fill ourselves up will allow for blessings to overflow in other areas of our lives.
This is what she had to say about her weekend, her way.
The perfect Friday Night:
"I see why growing up, my mama would tell me to just go take a nap somewhere. At the end of a long week, that's all I want! I believe naps, a good meal and some prayer can truly change things! It's also my belief that my greatest act of self-care is honoring the purpose over my life so I consider self-care to be any act that I can do to edify my spirit, mind, body and soul.
"I use the Self-Journal as a great tool to reflect on lessons learned, and progress I've made for the week. On any given Friday night, you can catch me cuddled up with my husband for our weekly date night (We - don't - miss - it!) eating at a new restaurant, watching a movie or falling down a YouTube rabbit hole."
Courtesy of Jovian Zayne
"My greatest act of self-care is honoring the purpose over my life so I consider self-care to be any act that I can do to edify my spirit, mind, body and soul."
How she powers up on Saturday Mornings:
"As my friend, fellow wife and entrepreneur Desiree has said, 'The ministry of home is REAL.' I try to hold my weekends sacred, doing little to NO work and prioritizing activities that keep my house in order, my marriage front and center and my spirit relaxed. I know that I can't give what I don't have, so I use my weekends as my time to replenish for the week ahead. I sometimes think about them as mini vacations and live by the 'Must Do vs. Nice to Do' rule.
"If it's not a 'Jovian, you absolutely have to do this' type of thing, it'll have to wait until next week. I want my Saturdays to feel fun and unbothered by the agenda I follow during the week. If it keeps me energized and moving towards my best, then I'm doing it on a Saturday. If it's wearing me out, I'm not. This mindset helps me prioritize important things like taking a nap, hitting the gym and [spending] quality time with family and friends."
Courtesy of Jovian Zayne
"I try to hold my weekends sacred, doing little to NO work and prioritizing activities that keep my house in order, my marriage front and center and my spirit relaxed. I know that I can't give what I don't have, so I use my weekends as my time to replenish for the week ahead."
The ideal Girls' Night:
"I LOVE MY GIRLS! With us being spread out all over the world, we love a good group FaceTime and are constantly talking on group texts and GroupMe. We share weekly wins every Wednesday aka 'WINSday' and prayer requests. My recipe for a great girls night: comfortable ambiance, good food, wine and intimate conversation.
"We'll celebrate any and everything together: promotions, new haircuts, cheekbones and breakups. For people looking for fun ways to spend quality time with their girls, I suggest inexpensive trips to new places in the US, watch parties at someone's house, themed dinners, brunch parties and worship circles."
Courtesy of Jovian Zayne
"My recipe for a great girls night: comfortable ambiance, good food, wine and intimate conversation."
How recharging helped her business:
"I've been reminded that I work to live the full life I want to experience. I don't live just to work. My life is only as full as my commitment to honor the purpose I see God has put on my life. I know that my purpose extends far beyond my career. I'm grateful that I love my work. I see direct connection to my purpose in my current career, but I also recognize that spending time with my family and friends, developing new healthy habits and exploring the world are a part of how I can honor God with the life that I have.
"It's important to remember that you can't give what you don't have. In order to give my best to my business, I must give my best to other areas of my life. That ultimately allows me to show up more present and connected in my business. I've learned from my mentors, sages and older guides that this mindset is critical to owning and living my definition of success."
Connect with Jovian on Instagram @jovianzayne.
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In a xoNecoleexclusive, the iconic actress opens up about embracing this season of her life, new projects, and overall being a “bad motherfucker.” Gabrielle reveals that she was 37 years old when she was diagnosed with perimenopause and is still going through it at 51 years old. Mayo Clinic says perimenopause “refers to the time during which your body makes the natural transition to menopause, marking the end of the reproductive years.”
“I haven't crossed over the next phase just yet, but I think part of it is when you hear any form of menopause, you automatically think of your mother or grandmother. It feels like an old-person thing, but for me, I was 37 and like not understanding what that really meant for me. And I don't think we focus so much on the word menopause without understanding that perimenopause is just the time before menopause,” she tells us.
Gabrielle Union
Photo by Brian Thomas
"But you can experience a lot of the same things during that period that people talk about, that they experienced during menopause. So you could get a hot flash, you could get the weight gain, the hair loss, depression, anxiety, like all of it, mental health challenges, all of that can come, you know, at any stage of the menopausal journey and like for me, I've been in perimenopause like 13, 14 years. When you know, most doctors are like, ‘Oh, but it's usually about ten years, and I'm like, ‘Uhh, I’m still going (laughs).’”
Conversations about perimenopause, fibroids, and all the things that are associated with women’s bodies have often been considered taboo and thus not discussed publicly. However, times are changing, and thanks to the Gabrielle’s and the Tia Mowry’s, more women are having an authentic discourse about women’s health. These open discussions lead to the creation of more safe spaces and support for one another.
“I want to be in community with folks. I don't ever want to feel like I'm on an island about anything. So, if I can help create community where we are lacking, I want to be a part of that,” she says. “So, it's like there's no harm in talking about it. You know what I mean? Like, I was a bad motherfucker before perimenopause. I’m a bad motherfucker now, and I'll be a bad motherfucker after menopause. Know what I’m saying? None of that has to change. How I’m a bad motherfucker, I welcome that part of the change. I'm just getting better and stronger and more intelligent, more wise, more patient, more compassionate, more empathetic. All of that is very, very welcomed, and none of it should be scary.”
The Being Mary Jane star hasn’t been shy about her stance on therapy. If you don’t know, here’s a hint: she’s all for it, and she encourages others to try it as well. She likens therapy to dating by suggesting that you keep looking for the right therapist to match your needs. Two other essential keys to her growth are radical transparency and radical acceptance (though she admits she is still working on the latter).
"I was a bad motherfucker before perimenopause. I’m a bad motherfucker now, and I'll be a bad motherfucker after menopause. Know what I’m saying? None of that has to change. How I’m a bad motherfucker, I welcome that part of the change."
Gabrielle Union and Kaavia Union-Wade
Photo by Monica Schipper/Getty Images
“I hope that a.) you recognize that you're not alone. Seek out help and know that it's okay to be honest about what the hell is happening in your life. That's the only way that you know you can get help, and that's also the only other way that people know that you are in need if there's something going on,” she says, “because we have all these big, very wild, high expectations of people, but if they don't know what they're actually dealing with, they're always going to be failing, and you will always be disappointed. So how about just tell the truth, be transparent, and let people know where you are. So they can be of service, they can be compassionate.”
Gabrielle’s transparency is what makes her so relatable, and has so many people root for her. Whether through her TV and film projects, her memoirs, or her social media, the actress has a knack for making you feel like she’s your homegirl. Scrolling through her Instagram, you see the special moments with her family, exciting new business ventures, and jaw-dropping fashion moments. Throughout her life and career, we’ve seen her evolve in a multitude of ways. From producing films to starting a haircare line to marriage and motherhood, her journey is a story of courage and triumph. And right now, in this season, she’s asking, “What’s next?”
“This is a season of discovery and change. In a billion ways,” says the NAACP Image Award winner. “The notion of like, ‘Oh, so and so changed. They got brand new.’ I want you to be brand new. I want me to be brand new. I want us to be always constantly growing, evolving. Having more clarity, moving with different purpose, like, and all of that is for me very, very welcomed."
"I want you to be brand new. I want me to be brand new. I want us to be always constantly growing, evolving. Having more clarity, moving with different purpose, like, and all of that is for me very, very welcomed."
She continues, “So I'm just trying to figure out what's next. You know what I mean? I'm jumping into what's next. I'm excited going into what's next and new. I'm just sort of embracing all of what life has to offer.”
Look out for Gabrielle in the upcoming indie film Riff Raff, which is a crime comedy starring her and Jennifer Coolidge, and she will also produce The Idea of You, which stars Anne Hathaway.
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Feature image by Mike Lawrie/Getty Images
