Quantcast
5 Questions To Ask Yourself Before You Reinvent Yourself

5 Questions To Ask Yourself Before You Reinvent Yourself

New year, new me?

Inspiration

It's safe to say the New Year is the self-proclaimed time to do a complete 180 in every area of our lives. At the same time, it's so easy to get caught up with wanting to reinvent our lives and do said complete 180 between 11:59 on December 31st and 12:01 on January 1. Why do we do that to ourselves? Why do we feel like we have to give in to the pressure of becoming a different person when the New Year gets here?

While I'm a lover of all things new, all things resolutions, and all things vision board parties at the top of the year, before we get into it all, ask yourself these questions:

What Do I Love About Myself?

Giphy

Trust me, I don't think I'm close to perfect. Not. Even. Close. But there are things about myself that I actually want to take into the new year. While there are changes I would like to make, I don't think I necessarily need to do a complete turnaround because there are things that are the core of who I am that I don't want to change.

Evolve? Yes. But not completely change for the sake of having something to cross off in the new year.

I think before we get into the reinvention of ourselves, we have to be careful not to let the things we love about ourselves be found guilty by association and fall by the wayside. In the middle of this process of becoming a completely new you, be sure to maintain those positives. Cause you're the bomb diggity baby girl.

Who Am I Doing It For? 

I was listening to this church message recently and the speaker was discussing how sometimes we have faith for God to do things in our lives because we subconsciously want to prove other people wrong. For example, to show the person who dumped us that it was their loss, or to prove to someone we're dating that we really are good enough. Even though I can't deny I love the feeling of having someone else realize how dope I am (or like to think I am), whether they've treated me amazingly or the opposite, I can't make my whole life about how they see me; self-reinventions included.

It really boils down to making sure that this reinvention and new lease on life is truly about you. Because you deserve to have what you feel is your best self, instead of spending life's most precious moments attempting to live up to what you want others to think about you.

What Do I Want To Change? 

Giphy

If we're honest with ourselves, there are probably a lot of things we can do better. From not procrastinating (me!) to learning how to say no (also me) and just taking better care of ourselves from the inside out, it's no secret that very few of us, if any, are completely happy with every detail that encompasses who we are. If for you, the new year is the best time to take on these challenging changes, I would suggest seriously taking time to think about what it is you want to change and why.

All of us are human so it might be easy to lose count of everything we aren't necessarily happy with. But prioritizing the things you want to change and knocking them out one at a time could be the definite key for you to reinvent yourself one change at a time, otherwise you may be feeling overwhelmed about having to do it all at once.

Who’s In My Circle? 

A lot of times, reinventing ourselves can impact the people around us just as much as it does our actual selves. Before you begin this journey, you should definitely do an evaluation of who's on your side. Who has been a ride or die friend for you through thick and thin, in the toughest moments? Those are the people you can count on to support your desire to become a better version of yourself. And for the ones who haven't, you don't necessarily have to cut them off. You just might have to redefine the roles they play in your life. It's not about thinking that you're better than them or that you're a new person and no longer have the time, it's about maintaining the part of you that you will work so hard to be, and not letting anyone or anything get in the way.

What Do I Really Want…Periodt? 

When you think about what 2019 will bring, what do you hope to see? What is it that will make you happy? There's a quote that says, "Whatever makes you happy, do that." When you reinvent yourself, upgrade yourself, or whatever you want to call it, I hope one of the things you consider is your true desires and wants. I'm in no way saying to be selfish, I'm just saying to think about yourself as much as you might have thought about pleasing others in the past for whatever reason.

We can't take any positivity for granted, especially when it comes to the vibes that surround becoming a new and better us.

But if our actual desires and dreams that cause us to take on this journey of reinvention is forgotten, then what was it all for?

Featured image by Getty Images.

Related Stories

How To Take Back Control Of Your Life – Read More

These iPhone & Android Apps Will Help You Stick With Your New Year's Resolutions - Read More

5 Ways You Can Be As Productive As Shonda Rhimes In The New Year - Read More

How To Find Balance When Your Life Is A Tightrope - Read More

Your October 2022 Horoscopes Are All About Finding Flow & Alignment

October is a month of balance. With some energy moving direct and some energy moving retrograde, there is a middle ground to find this month between what is unfolding and what you are letting go. The month begins with Mercury officially moving out of retrograde and going direct in Virgo. Mercury this month is cleaning house and sprucing things up after the somewhat tyrant energy it’s brought over the past few weeks. Now that Mercury is direct, there is less interruption when it comes to daily flow and plans, and this is a good month to start setting things into motion.

Keep reading...Show less
The daily empowerment fix you need.
Make things inbox official.
The Myth Of The Sex Drive & How Libido Changes From Your 20s, 30s, 40s & 50s

No one prepared me for how horny I would be in my late 30s. All the elders in my life prepared me for random chin hairs, weight gain, and menopause but no one said a mumbling word about my sex drive. Something happens the closer you get to forty. I went from wanting sex here and there to wanting it all the damn time. Is there a support group for this? I can’t be the only one who has the sex drive of the Energizer Bunny. Upon my research to figure out why I felt like a cat in heat, I discovered several theories surrounding women and our sex drives–including one that says the concept of having a sex drive is a myth altogether.

Keep reading...Show less
Exclusive: Da’Vinchi On Protecting His Peace & Why He Prioritizes Mindset Over Looks In Dating

Da’Vinchi has appeared in many television series such as All American and Grown-ish but it was his role in BMF as Terry Flenory that helped propel his career forward. Since starring in BMF, he made his Broadway debut with Thoughts of a Colored Man and is currently shooting an undisclosed movie in Vancouver. The 26-year-old actor is beginning to see the fruits of his labor and so it’s hard to imagine that he almost went in a different direction. Da’Vinchi spoke with xoNecole’s Dana Blair for our xoMan series about acting, being a sapiosexual, and protecting his peace.

Keep reading...Show less
Black woman with an afro and tube top laughing

If you have been on social media for any significant amount of time this year you may have come across women saying that they are in their “villain era.” For these women, being a villain means embracing the negativity and judgment from others that comes when you say “no” to people, and living your life unapologetically. For them, being a villain means letting the chips fall where they may when you no longer allow other people’s ideas about you to restrict you from living the life that you want and deserve.

Keep reading...Show less
Niecy Nash Says Her Relationship With Jessica Betts Is The First Time She Has Felt 'Fully Seen'

When Niecy Nash-Betts announced she was married to musician Jessica Betts, many people were surprised. The Emmy-nominated actress has a history of dating only men and was even married twice prior to meeting her wife. However, Niecy has become an example of the saying “love is love” and she and Jessica have been open about their relationship ever since.

Keep reading...Show less
Exclusive Interviews
Latest Posts