

Back around the turn of the century, I used to date a Muslim (if you can call it that; it was actually more like I used to have sex with a bestie). I could write an entire book on the lessons that I learned from that experience, both good and horrifying. On the silver lining tip, something that I appreciate is that he introduced me to a collection of sayings from Muhammed known as hadith. As far as other spiritual content goes, I make it no secret that some of my absolute favorite proverbs are Buddhist ones; in fact, one of my all-time favorite parables is a popular one in the Buddhist faith (you can check it out here). Yet out of all of the spiritual books and readings that I have come across, I firmly and unapologetically prefer the Bible over them all.
There is something about that book, in particular, that is both timeless and multi-dimensional. I say that because, I don't know about you, but I can read one verse on Monday, come back to that very same one on Wednesday, and it will speak to me totally differently. Plus, books like Ecclesiastes and Proverbs are chalked with so much common sense that if most of us heeded those two alone, there's no telling how much the quality of our lives would improve. Yeah, the Bible is dope. Extremely so.
At the same time, I must say that I didn't really see the Good Book as a great single woman's manual until I started learning Hebrew (Christ was a Jew so, why not?) and really studying the Word for myself (2 Timothy 2:15—AMPC). Once that happened, can't nobody tell me that the holy Scriptures aren't true lifesavers!
If you're a single woman and bible reader, but you've been having a difficult time finding how to merge the two in a truly powerful and applicable way, I'll share with you some of the verses that have made me feel like God truly gets me—even, and some ways especially, as a single woman.
1. "So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the Lord God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man."---Genesis 2:21-22 (NLT)
Some people are gonna want to give pushback on this and that's fine. But personally, I've never been big on it being a requirement that men pursue women. It also makes me cringe whenever I hear that it should be expected because "men are hunters" (I'm not a deer in the woods; I am a daughter of the Most High). Am I saying that men shouldn't be chivalrous? Of course, they should be. But the whole chase a woman down thing? I mean, if I am a gift from God, why does a man have to kill himself to have me? Gifts are less taxing than that. Besides the whole "He who findeth a wife" back-up take (Proverbs 18:22)? Look up the definitions of find one day. They are pretty enlightening.
Anyway, when I decided to ask God to show me how he desires relationships to go, I "took a stroll" through the Garden of Eden. Genesis 2:22 is a total game-changer. Adam did not pursue his wife. In fact, he didn't even decide when it was time to be with her. GOD DID. While God was creating who was a perfect complement for Adam, ole' boy was asleep the entire time. Then, when God was done, he brought the Woman to Adam. Some translations use the word "presented".
This is dope on a few levels. One, because for the Woman (Eve's name in the Garden) to be brought, it gives me the impression that she had to have had her own time to God before being in Adam's life. Two, since God did all of the work, Adam couldn't insert his ego into the situation. He didn't "acquire" his wife; she was a gift given to him. She was all God's doing. Besides, Adam was a gardener, not a hunter. Gardeners cultivate, just as all good husbands should. See why I think Genesis 2:22 is so on point?
2. "For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well."---Psalm 139:13-14 (NKJV)
This verse right here shows that God doesn't become a part of our lives the day we are born. From this, it looks like he's totally invested and involved from the moment of conception (an article all on its own). Yet the reason why these verses make the list is because it's a reminder that one of the best ways to honor God is through praise. And while we're in the process of thanking him for thinks like food, water, shelter, family and friends, we should also thank him for all of the effort and energy that he placed into making each and every one of us.
James 5:16 says that we are to confess and be healed, right? Something that I used to struggle with is what I call "pretty girl syndrome". No, I'm not talking about me. I'm talking about all of the women that I used to be surrounded by who I thought were stunning; stunning to the point where I envied them. One day, my mother (who is on that list) said, "So, when people say you look like me, what do you think they mean?" Check. Then when I really let these verses sink it, it became a checkmate.
Some of us could stand to repent, right here and right now, for thinking that God spent more time designing the women around us than us. Can you imagine how insulting that is to our Heavenly Father to think or feel that way? More than that, how much it hurts his feelings?
God is excellent in all He does. You are no exception. Since His works are marvelous and you are one of them, don't you think it's time that you gave Him some heartfelt praise for all He put into you? All that He put in that no one else has quite like you? Amen? Amen.
3. "Oh, let me warn you, sisters in Jerusalem, by the gazelles, yes, by all the wild deer: Don’t excite love, don’t stir it up, until the time is ripe—and you’re ready."---Song of Solomon 2:7 (Message)
Now this is a good one. Hands down, Song of Solomon is one of my favorite books of the Bible because it reminds us that God is all about sex and intimacy. According to Scripture, His standards are high (you can read between the lines there), but He is all for love and passion. At the same time, He is also a great source of common sense (Proverbs 2:6-8—Message); that's why this one resonates with me so.
If you're not familiar with the Shulamite woman who is featured in this book of the Bible, she's a dark sistah (yep) who has enough wisdom and insight to basically tell her friends, "It's best to love someone when the time is right. When things line up in such a way where you are ready and he is ready."
Can you imagine all of the drama that would be spared if we all thought this way? If, instead of one of our friends getting a DM from some ex and us telling her that it's a sign that he's the one, that we encourage her to wait before responding and to pray and process if it truly is a good idea to reach back out or not?
Again, Song of Solomon is filled with passion. All good. But this verse right here complements something that Benjamin Franklin once said—"If passion drives you, let reason hold the reins." Yup.
4. "My darling, everything about you is beautiful, and there is nothing at all wrong with you."---Song of Solomon 4:7 (NCV)
Only an ego-maniac or totally self-delusional individual believes that the person who is meant to be their significant other should never challenge them (that reminds me, when you get a chance, check out the awesome points found in the videos "7 Signs This Man Might Be for You" and "7 Signs This Might Be from the Devil"). If you want to grow, you're gonna need to hear about yourself sometimes, whether you want to, like it or not.
At the same time, this verse right here is a reminder that your man will be your biggest fan. He will not be out here dropping hints about how much prettier you would be if you lost weight, had a bigger butt or changed your hair. He's gonna be like what a husband once said to me about his wife—"I love that when God made her, he had me in mind."
We are all human. This means that we ALL have something to work on and improve upon. But when this man said that there was nothing wrong with this woman he loved, while a good relationship improves us, what he was essentially saying is there was nothing that he wanted to change.
Women deserve to hear this. Men do too. So ladies, if you're currently seeing someone and you're already plottin' and plannin' ways to change him after marriage, I'll just say that if both of you can't say this verse to one another, perhaps you're not meant for one another. At least, not right now.
5. "God will create a new thing in this land: A transformed woman will embrace the transforming God!”---Jeremiah 31:22 (Message)
Back when I was going through a bit of a life transition that was wearing me all the way out, God led me to this Scripture right here. Whew. Not only was going through so much because he was doing something new (sometimes, in order to get the right "house", the foundation has to be demolished too), but the transition was all about transformation.
To be transformed is "to undergo a change in form, appearance, or character". This is why I wrote the article "5 Signs That You Really Know A Person". If we're all taking this thing called time seriously, many of us are not the same person we were six months ago, let alone five years ago (so know, everyone should not be able to say that they "know" you). And if we are as "spiritual" as we claim, we definitely should be doing some transforming; we definitely should want God to transform us.
The other thing that I like about this particular verse is it says that while the woman (which is Israel in this case) got to a place of transformation, God was still transforming! It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes by evangelist Oswald Chambers—"Never try to make your experience a principle for others, but allow God to be as creative and original with others as He is with you." Why? Because since God changes his form or appearance (not really his character; Malachi 3:6 [NKJV] says, "For I am the Lord, I do not change"), we should let God come to us (and others) how He chooses. We shouldn't "box Him in" as it relates to how or when He decides to transform us and our lives.
6. "And when you pray, do not use vain repetitions as the heathen do. For they think that they will be heard for their many words. Therefore do not be like them. For your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him."---Matthew 6:7-9 (NKJV)
Yeah buddy. A lot of church leaders could stand to read—and reread—those first two sentences, but I digress. The reason why this is so important is because of the last line. Although a lot of life consists of learning the difference between what we want and what we need (especially what we want in correlation to what God says that we need), if we really do believe that our Heavenly Father has our best interest at heart, we've got to trust that He doesn't need us reminding—or worse, instructing—Him about how our lives should go. Although it's truly an epidemic, how many people feel like they can pick or choose what part of the Bible is applicable and right, if you claim to be a follower of the Scriptures, this is not one that can or should be omitted.
Prayer is fine. Biblically-encouraged too. But whatever it is that you are going through right now, no matter how big the need may be, know that you are totally on God's radar. He saw the "requirement" or "urgent want" well before you did.
And, as my favorite quote from Pastor John Piper states, "God is always doing 10,000 things in your life, and you may be aware of three of them." Trust and believe that your needs are somewhere on that list ("Are not five sparrows sold for two copper coins? And not one of them is forgotten before God. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows."—Luke 12:6-7—NKJV)
7. "There’s more to sex than mere skin on skin. Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, 'The two become one.' Since we want to become spiritually one with the Master, we must not pursue the kind of sex that avoids commitment and intimacy, leaving us more lonely than ever—the kind of sex that can never 'become one.'"----I Corinthians 6:16-17 (Message)
I have shared before that I'm a firm believer that we all should be able to explain our purpose in three words or phrases. Mine are centered around sex, marriage and the Sabbath—all of which are biblical covenant principles. Believe you me, it's an odd combo and sometimes I catch heat for it. I mean, how can I profess to be a bible follower and talk about sex as much as I do (gasp!)?
You can read articles of mine like "We Should Really Rethink The Term 'Casual Sex'" and "10 Wonderful Reasons Why Consistent Sex In Marriage Is So Important" to know that I don't take sex lightly; I find it to be extremely sacred (after all, I'm a marriage life coach not a sex therapist). At the same time, I know that different people come into different insights about sex in their own way and time. I also know that the Church, overall, has done a horrific job addressing sex and sexuality. It's like something I read that a man by the name of Don Schrader once said—"To hear many religious people talk, one would think God created the torso, head, legs and arms, but the devil slapped on the genitals." Indeed. Indeed.
So yes, sex should be discussed. Not just discussed but celebrated. It's nothing to be hush-hush or ashamed about. At the same time, if you take Scripture seriously, verses like this one shouldn't be overlooked. Sex is about a heck of a lot more than gettin' your rocks off and there are spiritual ramifications that go deep, deep, DEEP. Always keep that in mind with the choices that you make—even as a single woman.
8. "Relax, everything’s going to be all right; rest, everything’s coming together; open your hearts, love is on the way!"---Jude 1:2 (Message)
I don't know about you, but I think that sometimes people underestimate what we go through as single women. We're responsible for so much on our own that it can be overwhelming, right? That's why one of my favorite "anchor Scriptures" is this one.
Once upon a time, after a heartbreak that I experienced, someone sent me this. I had never seen it before and it totally blew my mind because I felt like it was customized and heaven sent just for me. Sometimes, all we need to hear in our spirit is, "Relax, my child. It's all going to work out for your good." Plus, the "love is on the way" part speaks to me on two different levels. One, I haven't been brought to my husband-king yet, but another Message Version verse that I totally dig is, "You don't get to know the time. Timing is the Father's business" (Acts 1:7).
This verse reminds me that I can't force the Universe; that I need to let things flow. And two, God is love; the Word tells us that in I John 4:7-16 tells us that. So, in the meantime, while I am awaiting my future beloved, Love is on the way to bring me so many other manifestations of his Love. And really…does it get better than that?
Like I said earlier, Scriptures present themselves differently to us all. But I do hope and, also believe, that if you spend a little time meditating on these eight, they can speak volumes and work miracles in your life, just as they did for me. Be blessed, sis.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
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7 Things I Learned After Becoming a Super Saved, Sanctified, Holy Ghost-Filled Christian
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Eva Marcille On Starring In 'Jason’s Lyric Live' & Being An Audacious Black Woman
Eva Marcille has taken her talents to the stage. The model-turned-actress is starring in her first play, Jason’s Lyric Live alongside Allen Payne, K. Michelle, Treach, and others.
The play, produced by Je’Caryous Johnson, is an adaptation of the film, which starred Allen Payne as Jason and Jada Pinkett Smith as Lyric. Allen reprised his role as Jason for the play and Eva plays Lyric.
While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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There Really Is Such A Thing As 'Spring Cleaning Your Spirituality,' Sis
When you think about the fact that the spring season symbolizes things like newness, rebirth, and starting over, from a spiritual standpoint, it makes all of the sense in the world that religious-based fasts, including Lent and Ramadan, would transpire during this season as well. As I recently reflected on this fact, it’s what actually got me to really thinking about the term “spring cleaning” and what it represents — the thorough cleaning or cleansing of a particular area.
You know, sometimes, when I go back and look at some of the articles that I’ve penned for the platform before, I truly can’t believe how fast time flies. Take the piece, “What's The Difference Between Being 'Religious' And Being 'Spiritual', Anyway?” — now, how in the world did it turn five this year? I can’t even begin to wrap my mind around it. And although the piece does address some key points — like the fact that there is somewhat of a difference between being spiritual and being religious (although more people should read James 1:27 in order to understand how the Bible defines religion to be…it just might surprise them) — I want to explore a deeper angle of our spirituality, along with what we should require of it.
Today, let’s look at spirituality from the perspective of “the quality of being concerned with the human spirit or soul as opposed to material or physical things,” “a quality that goes beyond religious affiliation, that strives for inspiration, reverence, awe, meaning and purpose…” (Murray and Zentner) and, perhaps, more than anything else, “the relationship between ourselves and something larger."
You know, it’s a woman by the name of Dr. Maya Spencer who once said, “Spirituality means knowing that our lives have significance in a context beyond a mundane everyday existence at the level of biological needs that drive selfishness and aggression. It means knowing that we are a significant part of a purposeful unfolding of Life in our universe.” Indeed.
And while keeping that in mind, if this is a time of your life when you would like to “clean or cleanse your spirituality” by doing things like removing negative energy, getting rid of old or counterproductive patterns and/or by stepping into an elevated space as far as your human spirit and soul are concerned, you might be pleasantly surprised by how easy and even fun that can be for you to do.
To effectively clean/cleanse your spirit, start by asking — and answering — the following five spirituality-focused questions:
What Inspires You?
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Remember how, in the intro, I shared that one definition of spirituality is “a quality that goes beyond religious affiliation, that strives for inspiration, reverence, awe, meaning and purpose…”? That is actually where I am pulling a lot of these questions from because, the reality is that focusing on things that inspire you, intentionally pondering your purpose, and also by encouraging yourself to become an overall better human being — these things definitely tie into your spiritual side whether you are “traditionally religious” or not.
And so, when it comes to cleansing your spirituality in this season, a great question to start off with is what actually inspires you? And listen, believe it or not, inspire is a pretty layered word. I say that because, while one definition is “to produce or arouse (a feeling, thought, etc.),” another is “to communicate or suggest by a divine or supernatural influence,” while synonyms of the word include excite, affect, cause, motivate, provoke, and instill. This means that if you truly want to say or do things from a place of inspiration, you need to produce things from a divine or supernatural space (interesting, right?).
The reason why it’s so important to “spring clean” in this department is, oftentimes you can be motivated or provoked by things that aren’t really all that good, healthy and/or beneficial for you (social media fast, anyone?) — things that take your mind off of what’s divine — sacred, godly and extremely good. As a result, you find yourself producing out of a mind and heart space that is compromised when it comes to your core standards, values, and even goals.
So yes, in the effort to cleanse your spirituality, begin by really reflecting on what you claim inspires you — then revisit what the word actually means…just to be sure that you are being honest with yourself about whether something or one is truly inspiring you…or not.
What Amplifies Your Purpose?
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Purpose is always something that is going to be a pretty big deal to me. That’s why I’ve written articles for the platform like “What Does It Mean To Have 'Purposeful Relationships'?,” “Please Stop Picking People Who Don't 'Fit' Your Purpose,” “The Conversation You Need To Have With Yourself Before The New Year Begins,” “How To Handle 'Purpose Fatigue'” and “5 Signs You Are Living Your True Purpose.” It’s because really, if you’re not focused, most of all, on the reason why you exist in the first place, nothing else is going to be fully, truly, and authentically fulfilling for you.
So, when it comes to this part of your spirituality, first take some time to make sure that you know what your purpose is. If you have no clue and you’re ready to find out, as a wise person once said, wisdom comes in the questions, even more than the answers, and Rockwood Leadership Institute has a whopping 132 questions that you can ask yourself in order to get to the root of what your purpose is here. On the flip side, if you do know and you’re just not feeling completely satisfied in what you are currently doing as it relates to executing your purpose, it sounds to me like you are going through a bit of a “purpose growth spurt,” and yes, there is such a thing.
For instance, I am very clear on what my purpose in life is — I am here to teach what I study and research about when it comes to the topics of covenant marriage, sex, and the biblical Sabbath. All are covenant principles that have been unbelievably compromised in a thousand different ways. However, as I evolve, transform, and mature, my understanding of what I know does as well, and that “upgrades” how I approach and share my purpose with others. You see, purpose is never supposed to be stagnant…it is ever-shifting as far as how you accomplish things within it.
And that’s why, spiritually, it’s so important that you make sure that you are AMPLIFYING YOUR PURPOSE. To amplify is “to make larger, greater, or stronger; enlarge; extend.” If you are not putting forth the effort to do just this, there is some spiritual cleansing that must be done because, if there is one thing about a person’s purpose, it’s the fact that it’s HUGE which means that there will always be plenty to do within it until their time on this earth ends.
What Makes You Love Better…and More?
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I believe I’ve mentioned before that a show that I loathe with every fiber of my being (and there really is so much to choose from these days — SMDH) is TV One’s For My Man. Not only is it a program that discourages full-level accountability, but it irks me to no end every time that it says that a woman did some heinous crime in the name of love. According to Scripture, GOD IS LOVE (I John 4:8&16). Not only that, but the Love Chapter in Scripture has a very healthy, sane, and mature take on how we should love and require love in return (I’m going to share two translations of I Corinthians 13:4-8 for expanded context):
“Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have. Love doesn’t strut, doesn’t have a swelled head, doesn’t force itself on others, isn’t always ‘me first,’ doesn’t fly off the handle, doesn’t keep score of the sins of others, doesn’t revel when others grovel, takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, puts up with anything, trusts God always, always looks for the best, never looks back, but keeps going to the end. Love never dies.” (I Corinthians 13 — Message)
“Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily. It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong]. It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail. Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]. Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end].” (I Corinthians 13 — AMPC)
Now, think about what you see displayed on television when it comes to relationships. Based on these verses, is it love? Is it really? Ponder all of the relationship content that’s on social media. Does it sound like this kind of love? Does it really? The times when you’ve done things that you know were purely rooted in selfishness, impatience, and/or refusing to do for others what you would want them to do for you — how can any of that be loving? If you do believe in God and you also believe that you were made in his image (Genesis 1:26-28), this means that a part of your own spiritual DNA is love. This also means that if you know that your love has been tainted by material or physical things (which, by definition, is the opposite of spirituality), it’s time to make some real adjustments.
That said, take some time, think about the people and things that you profess to love, and ask yourself if it’s really love or is it lust or entitlement or immaturity. Then ask yourself what you can do to love those individuals and items better.
Remember, since you are made from Love, it’s important that you love like you are.
How Effective Are You When It Comes to Compassion?
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Personally, I think that whenever someone does something reckless and then follows up with the Bible says not to judge, I find it to be a supreme level of gaslighting. The context of that verse is saying that in the way that you judge, you will be judged and that you should make sure that you are right in the area that you are judging before you judge someone else (Matthew 7:1-5); however, be clear that judgment is a form of accountability which is why there are also verses like “Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgment” (John 7:24 — NKJV) that exist — not to mention the fact that discernment literally means “keen judgment” and the Good Book supremely promotes that: “Strike a scoffer, and the simple will become wary; rebuke one who has understanding, and hewill discern knowledge.” (Proverbs 19:25 — NKJV)
And that’s why, any time the topic of “don’t judge” comes up, I am known for saying something along the lines of, “PUH-LEEZE. If I say ‘You’re cute,’ I just judged you. Humans don’t have a problem with judgment; they don’t like criticism or accountability.” And gee, is that unfortunate because it’s hard to grow without both of those things. However, the key that comes with being on the giving end of criticism or holding someone accountable is applying a quote by author Anne McCaffrey: “Make no judgments where you have no compassion.”
This world has a lot of…stuff going on, stuff that needs to be addressed and stuff that needs compassion applied while it is. By definition, compassion is about having concern for others, especially if what you see them going through, they have either told you or you can discern is tied to some level of internal suffering. And that’s why, in the spirit of spiritual cleansing, something else to ask is if you are holding others and even yourself accountable while operating from a place of genuine care and concern or is your ego just wanting to elevate itself or prove that it’s right?
You know, we’re living in a time when, more and more, people are frowning on humility which is unfortunate because a definite quality that comes with being a compassionate person is absolutely that — “By humility and the fear of the Lord are riches and honor and life.” (Proverbs 22:4 — NKJV)
It really is almost impossible to be profoundly spiritual without being a compassionate person. Is this an area that needs some “cleaning up”? If so, there is no time like the present.
What Encourages You to Be Wiser and Full of More Truth?
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Musician Jimi Hendrix once said, “Knowledge speaks, wisdom listens.” Aristotle once said, “Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” Confucius once said, “By three methods we may learn wisdom: first, by reflection, which is the noblest; second, by imitation, which is the easiest; and third, by experience, which is the bitterest." Thomas Jefferson once said, “The wisest men know their weakness.” Author Gift Gugu Mona once said, “A woman of peace is a wise woman who understands that peace is more powerful than trying to prove a point.”
And what does it mean to be wise?
People who can regulate their emotions are wise. People who actually learn from their experiences (and the experiences of others, so that they don’t have to experience everything) are wise. People who know how to tame their ego are wise. People who are flexible/adaptable, non-materialistic, are self-aware, can be relied upon for great perspectives and insights, and are teachable are wise. The self-disciplined are wise. The patient are wise. The non-entitled are wise. Those who prioritize well are wise.
Those who do not live above their means (across the board), they are also wise. And there is no way that you can be wise without being willing to be completely honest, yes truthful with yourself about where you could stand to gain more wisdom and what must be done — and sometimes sacrificed — in order to get it.
And so, as I close this piece out, when it comes to spring cleaning your spirituality, ask yourself who and what encourages and enables you to become a wiser individual — AND who and what hinders that from transpiring. Then be honest with yourself about what is challenging you for the better and what, frankly, is only dumbing you down. Indeed, in order to live out the full potential of your spirituality, wisdom must come into play. However, it’s important to keep in mind that, for wisdom to truly flourish, it is a conscious choice — a daily decision.
And it will never come so long as you are making up excuses, justifying poor behavior (check out “Accountability Time: Let's Stop Calling It A 'Mistake' When It Was A 'Choice'”) or lying to yourself about what needs to be done. Taking those approaches to life is literally the opposite of being wise.
A French priest by the name of Pierre Teilhard de Chardin once said, “We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.” I can only imagine how much the quality of our lives would improve if we took that in on a very serious level.
The good news is you can choose to do it — right here and right now.
See yourself as a spiritual being.
Clean/cleanse whatever hinders that reality.
And watch how you begin to soar, supernaturally, by design, because of it, sis.
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Featured image by Guido Mieth/Getty Images