
The Real-Life Bow Explores Redefining Balance & Parenthood As A Mom Of 6 In New Book

It's always a good look when a power woman of color on TV seems to have it all---a great career, smart children, and a supportive husband---in a way that leaves the cheese factor at the market and brings the comedy and authenticity along the ride.
Black-ish, which was renewed for a fifth season this spring, delivers that and then some, with the character Rainbow "Bow" Johnson (played by the uber-fab Tracee Ellis Ross), an anesthesiologist, mother of four, and wife of Andre "Dre" Johnson taking the lead.
With TV, you have the luxury of rehearsals, cuts, re-dos, and edits, but what some of you may not know is that there's a real-life Bow creating her own version of balance in a world full of transitions and unpredictability.
Courtesy of Rainbow Barris
In real life, Rainbow "Bow" Barris, MD is also a mother (of six) and an anesthesiologist. But where the line between fact and fiction emboldens is the fact that the real Bow is wife of the creator of Black-ish, Kenya Barris. And add juggling her husband's Hollywood schedule, slaying on the red carpet, being on mommy duty to her children (ranging in age from 1 to 18), and making the rounds in promoting a new book about family and motherhood to her script---you've got just a small taste of what life is like for Dr. Bow Barris.
"The biggest difference in the show are the specifics of how a character might play out a situation," Barris said during our exclusive xoNecole interview. "What Kenya gets a chance to do on a regular basis in the writers' room is, in retrospect, he can alter or change the way a character responds to a particular situation. The situations may be the same but the way the characters respond might be changed a little bit. Our life is so dynamic. We are just getting to a point now where we have some regularity in our schedules, and those regular schedules are still very irregular."
"Our life is so dynamic."
For Barris, balancing the irregular as a mom and doctor can be a challenge even beyond her husband's Hollywood hustle. Her boss-level tenacity and determination were made clear when she recalled how she completed medical school while already a mother of two at the time. Being quick on her feet, compassionate, hard-working, and flexible comes in handy both at home and at work.
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"One of the reasons I chose to do what I do in medicine is so I can leave [work] at work. That was super important to me [as a mother]," she said. "However, I know it's still a part of who we are---bringing home what we do. I love talking about medicine and my job, and I bring things home when I'm prompted to do so. One of the most important aspects of my job is problem-solving. When something happens, I automatically turn on this [analytical] mode of 'How am I going to fix this?' It's become an automatic part of who I am. I'm super-grateful that's something from my work that I'm able to bring home and use in a positive [way] in my life."
Her role as an anesthesiologist requires her to provide very specific expertise and care when a patient is in some of the most painful, vulnerable, and life-threatening situations. "I don't know how anyone could be in medicine and not love it," she said. "There's a mental and physical stress that comes with [it all]. I don't think it's worth it to do something in medicine and not completely and truly love it."
Self-care is huge when you're a professional woman wearing quite a few hats.
Redefining what balance means for Barris and her family led her to let go of the pressure of trying to live up to a cookie-cutter ideal. "On a daily basis, I may not be able to find or feel like I have [time to practice self-care] but in a week or in a month, I'm going to get a massage, a manicure, a pedicure. For me, knowing those times will come up [later] helps me find my balance instead of expecting that every week I have a specific time [for self-care]. I understand that my [version of] balance doesn't necessarily look like what someone else's picture or idea of what balance is. We try to find what works for us and our life and really embrace the [journey]."
"I understand that my version of balance doesn't necessarily look like what someone else's picture or idea of what balance is."
In her new book, Keeping Up with the Johnsons: Bow's Guide to Black-ish Parenting, Barris talks about creating one's own normal with her family. Much of this includes knowing that sometimes the blueprint for success given to you growing up might change based on your unique life experiences and growth.
"I grew up with a very strong mother [who oftentimes would say], 'You can do whatever you want to do. You don't need a man.' And I think that is very common for a lot of young black women. I really had to learn that what I was taught and what was ingrained in me for so long--- those things may be true, but I have to make [things] work for my life. Doing it all wasn't working for my life. I can do it all, but that doesn't mean I want to."
Courtesy of Rainbow Barris
Barris said in writing the book, she wanted to give fans of the show a view from Bow's side of parenting, where you get a glimpse into the motherhood side of the partnership. "What I decided to do was start with a part of my life that I felt was relatable [in that] fans can find some similarities between the characters on the show and the situations in the book. I explore how there are things I was taught to do---things my mom would say, like, 'Well, you should do things this way,' or 'Everyone does it like this'---and me having to figure out [what] works for me. It really does focus on raising kids and these different experiences we've had, from my point of view, as opposed to the show from Kenya's or Dre's point of view."
Adding author to her resume was her way of continuing to create her own lane and continue expanding on the narrative that her life inspires on TV---as well as the narrative she's built for her life up until now.
"I think it is important for any woman to set goals, and getting there hopefully leads you to want to strive for the next goal. When we stop striving for greater, we stop living," Barris says. "You don't have to sit in anyone's box. Create your own box---just make sure it doesn't have a lid on it. When you want to get out or change the shape, you can do that. Don't be afraid to keep growing and changing, accept the person you're evolving into."
"You don't have to sit in anyone's box. Create your own box."
For more Dr. Barris, follow her on Instagram and be sure to check out her new parenting book here.
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Eva Marcille On Starring In 'Jason’s Lyric Live' & Being An Audacious Black Woman
Eva Marcille has taken her talents to the stage. The model-turned-actress is starring in her first play, Jason’s Lyric Live alongside Allen Payne, K. Michelle, Treach, and others.
The play, produced by Je’Caryous Johnson, is an adaptation of the film, which starred Allen Payne as Jason and Jada Pinkett Smith as Lyric. Allen reprised his role as Jason for the play and Eva plays Lyric.
While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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Spring is upon us, and with this time of year comes the annual closet cleanout we so desperately need and collectively look forward to. As the chill of winter finally gives way to sunnier days, it’s the perfect opportunity to clear out what no longer serves us in life and our closets. A symbol of new beginnings and transformations, the shift in seasons is the perfect time to declutter our space while releasing the old to welcome the new.
During the process of evaluating our wardrobes, we determine what we can live without while looking forward to what it is we truly need. With trends constantly coming and going, it’s easy to get caught up in the endless cycle of “must-haves” that barely last a season. To help you create a closet you actually love, one that feels stylish, effortless, and true to you, we’ve curated 10 essentials that will ground your style and keep you ready for whatever the season brings.
1.White Tank Top
The must-have ribbed white tank is the number one staple everyone needs in their spring and summer wardrobe. Perfectly paired with denim, soft trousers, maxi skirts, and more, the combinations are indeed endless. A ribbed tank is relatively inexpensive, even with a quality find that provides plenty of wear and durability.
2.Denim Maxi Skirt
As mentioned above, a maxi skirt is a perfect foundation for a fashion-forward casual outfit. Denim maxi skirts, with their nod to the 2000s era, have proven to be a versatile staple that can be dressed up or down depending on your mood and plans for the day. Keep it casual by pairing a denim maxi with sneakers and a simple white top for everyday errands, or elevate the look with a sleek heel, cut-out top, and moto jacket for a more polished, modern take.
3.Straight Leg Denim
When it comes to denim, the straight-leg silhouette has officially cemented its place as a go-to style. Offering a slim, streamlined fit without the look and feel of skinny jeans, this cut pairs perfectly with everything from boots to sneakers. With a range of washes from light blue to indigo, the slim-leg denim is a timeless wardrobe essential that blends comfort and style easily.
4.Statement Jewelry
Minimal jewelry had its moment, but lately, bold accessories have taken center stage. Statement pieces have the power to elevate even the simplest outfits, adding instant personality and polish. If not wearable art, it's stackable jewelry, with the chunkier being the better. If you’re not ready to give up the minimal look, add in a statement necklace layered with minimal chains and hoop earrings to achieve an effortless, cool girl look.
5.Loafers
If you’re a chunky boot lover, loafers are the perfect swap for warm weather. Style with chunky socks when wearing a skirt, or slip into a classic pair with oversized, long-length, low-rise jeans. Loafers have firmly earned their spot as a year-round staple, offering the perfect blend of style, comfort, and versatility.
6.Oversized Sunglasses
Nothing about this year is about blending in or being subtle, which is why designer frames from Loewe, Gucci, and Tom Ford continue to set the standard for bold, statement-making looks when it comes to eyewear. Just like most accessories, frames are bigger and bolder, thanks to classic aviator styles and oversized sunnies with face-shaping silhouettes.
7.Shoulder Bag
There's something about the shoulder bag that continues to captivate the fashion world. It's small yet conveniently fits all necessities with a limitless range of colors, shapes, and patterns to match any look. It’s also the perfect balance between the micro mini and the oversized tote. If looking for a classic designer bag for spring, its size and shape will be worth the investment, as this silhouette will never go out of style.
8.Button-Down Long Sleeve
The button-down long sleeve is one of the most loved closet essentials. The versatility is unmatched, and the price is unbeatable for the amount of wear one can achieve in this staple piece. Worn open, closed, layered underneath a corset, or wrapped around one's waist, there's more than enough reason to benefit from owning a crisp white button-down top. Pair with leggings and heels for a casual chic moment, layered with statement accessories for a classic spring look.
9. Dad Trouser
Trousers are a great option for women who love to stretch the limits of chic workwear. The "Dad Pant" is a classic tailored aesthetic with a high-rise fitted waist and extra-long hem, a length perfect for high heels, sneakers, or chunky sandals. Opting for lightweight fabric is also perfect for year-round temperatures. Wear long trousers with a fitted white top, and an oversized black or beige blazer with pointed-toe heels for a sophisticated look day or night.
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Featured image by Edward Berthelot/Getty Images
Originally published on March 16, 2023