Once the honeymoon phase packs its bags and leaves, you and your partner have come face to face with the actual "work" it takes to stay together. From what to watch on TV to how the toilet paper should look on the toilet paper roll, you will have these arguments.
Some arguments will test the foundation of your relationship. Some may end with a simple "I'm sorry," others may lead to nights on the couch, refusal of sex, and the silent treatment. What happens when you discover that your partner is overly argumentative?
You know, someone who would make it their mission to have at least one good argument a day, one who loves to disturb the peace, or someone who enjoys arguing for the sake of arguing, or you could be the person who is the overly argumentative one. Not to fear, your girl is here to help you get to the root of the problem.
Here are four reasons why you or your partner might be argumentative and ways to combat this problem to never exist in your relationship ever again.
No matter where this unhappiness stems from, people become argumentative when they have a hard time expressing their dismay. Solution: Be honest and get to the root of the problem. If this unhappiness stems from within or with your partner, tell them how you feel. In an article with Bustle, life coach Kali Rogers states:
"If you can get on their level by asking questions and truly understanding where this combative nature comes from, together you two can work on building a different form of communication."
Being a victim of emotional abuse in the past
Victims of emotional abuse have a hard time explaining any emotions they could have. The lack of confidence and fear of not being understood can cause frustration. Let's be honest, you will not always agree with your partner. It is excellent to agree to disagree, and it's also OK to counter without a solution. The critical thing to focus on is the respect and trust you both have for each other. It is possible to disagree and still have love and admiration for each other. If you or your partner are having issues with how confrontation is occuring due to feeling triggered from past traumas, try bringing those feelings to the light. It might be difficult to be vulnerable in this way, but the shift in dynamic in how you converse will be well worth the effort.
Nobody wants to admit when they're wrong. For partners who have problems dealing with the shame and embarrassment of being wrong, not wanting to fall on their swords in disagreements will always lead to an argument. This tactic only protects the humiliation of being wrong and losing the "fight". The real question is, "Why is your focus on trying to be right and not finding a solution?" It begs the question on what exactly are you trying to hide from your partner? During these situations, it's best to be proactive in acknowledging how your partner feels and provide reassurance to avoid future arguments.
Because it's just the way they (you) are
Many of our habits stem from the environment in which we spent our childhood. Being overly argumentative wasn't a choice you made one day in your adult life. You became a product of your environment. That doesn't mean it's a death sentence. It just means that you have to be mindful of these confrontational situations as they present themselves.Author April Masini explains:
"For starters, don't assume they realize what they're doing. You might say, 'You're arguing with me,' and test the waters. Instead of fighting back, give them a chance to back off. If they're surprised, then merely bringing arguments to light is a great way to begin to dissolve them.
"You can also ask, 'Why are you arguing with me?' Statements such as those take the focus of the issue and onto the relationship dynamic. They may open up and tell you that they're angry about something else, stressed from work, or something that brings the two of you closer to a healthy relationship dynamic."
It's important to understand personal insecurities and how they play a part in the list above. According to Psychology Today, some causes of insecurity are genetics, environmental stressors, fear of disappointing others, dependency, and broken trust. With patience and healthy dialogue with your partner, overcoming these insecurities will help you become a better individual and a better partner.
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Writer, Empath, Listener, Self Improver, and a motivational speaker to her homegirls Teisha LeShea currently resides in California who loves to add fifteen million items to her Amazon cart. She is passionate about wellness, spiritual improvement, leveling up, and setting up twice a month therapy appointments. She writes with you in mind. Her listicle and personal stories will inspire you to dig deep within yourself to be a better you. You can follow her on Instagram @teisha.leshea and & @tl_teisha.leshea
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.
There are moments on our health journey when our bodies are bugging us to hit the reset button.
With life, we can start to see slips in our diet, irregular exercising, and inconsistent sleep schedules, and our mental health can suffer because of it. But what many people come to find is that with just a few adjustments — as opposed to restrictions — being made to their food intake, we can see a focus more on eating “the right” calories and less on being on a restrictive diet.
"Raw Till 4" is a dietary concept and lifestyle associated with the raw vegan and high-carb, low-fat vegan (HCLF) movements. Created by Australian blogger and YouTube star known as 'Freelee the Banana Girl', the method suggests eating raw, uncooked plant-based foods until 4 p.m. each day and then having a cooked, vegan meal in the evening.
The Raw Till 4 lifestyle follows the guidelines of vegan and rawist eating and involves consuming fruits, vegetables, nuts, seeds, and sprouted grains in an uncooked, natural state until the designated time of 4 p.m. or around one’s typical dinner time. After 4 p.m., a cooked vegan meal is consumed, which may include foods like steamed vegetables, grains, legumes, and plant-based sources of protein like tofu or tempeh.
On TikTok, creator Adina Yaffa is repopularizing the trend, sharing how it’s helped to improve digestion, boost energy levels, and support weight loss.
Replying to @🌜kat🌛 here is what I eat in a day on a raw till 4 lifestyle. I eat with the sun and according to the circadian rhythm that out bodies follow on a typical day. Where i drink liquids during the first 8 hours, then juicy fruits, then smoothies, more dense building fats, proteins and veggies! #snatchedwaist #bellyfat #bellybloat #smallwaist #hourglass #rawtill4
“During the hours of 4 a.m. and 8 a.m., your body is in an elimination phase and needs all the help it can get,” Yaffa says in the clip. “So what you’re going to do is drink coconut water, citrus juices, and green juices during this time, and around 8 a.m., you can break your fast with some fruit. I suggest juicing fruits, and then after that, I suggest having a smoothie or a bowl with berries and granola so you can get your fats and healthy proteins in.”
Raw till 4 has so many benefits including better digestion, nutrients, belly fat and bloat elimination, snatched waist, more energy and so much more! #snatchedwaist #bellyfat #bellybloat #smallwaist #hourglass
On the official Raw Till 4 website, Freelee the Banana Girl shares tips on how to get the best outcomes of this lifestyle change, which include:
- “Stay hydrated! You should pee about 8-12 times per day, and your urine should be clear. Drink 1 liter of water when you wake up in the morning, and 1 liter of water about 30 minutes before each meal for optimal results.”
- “Fragmented sodium (salt) should be kept to a minimum. Use herbs, lemon juice, etc. wherever possible in place of salt.”
- “Eat unlimited calories at every meal, no restriction. The majority of your calories each day should come from fruit. Don’t under-eat on fruit during the day or 'save up' your calories for dinner time. RT4 is about abundance at every meal.”
- “Move your body daily. Find an activity you love and make it your playful exercise.”
- “Make sure to get lots of rest, relaxation, and good sleep. Learning to incorporate good rest, early nights, and regular sleeping patterns into your life will greatly improve your overall health.”
- “Practice gratitude and peaceful emotions at mealtime, and get a vision book started! Be sure to enjoy this journey. Focus on long-term health instead of short-term results.”
Critics argue that it can be challenging to get all the necessary nutrients from a raw vegan diet and that it may not be suitable for everyone, especially over the long term.
As with any diet, it's important to consult with a healthcare professional or registered dietitian before making significant dietary changes to ensure that it meets your individual nutritional needs and health goals.
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