
Why You'll Never See Kerry Washington's Kid(s) Or Relationship Status On Social Media

You want to know what I’ve learned about being a blogger on the Internet? Keep your relationship to yourself. That whole “less is more” approach? It’s true.
It’s no secret that we’re in an age of all things oversharing and social media. We share our style choices on Snapchat and our “private” dates on Instagram. We allow people that we’ve never met, yet call “friends,” into our lives daily through our words on Facebook. We’re constantly giving to others in some form on Twitter through the conversations we have with anyone who can relate to us via retweets. But what do we keep for ourselves? What do we hold sacred and is privacy valued?
As a creative, my means of an outlet is found in writing, helping me with acceptance of a situation and healing through words. A few years ago, I shared personal stories of the status of my relationship and while the intent was never for a mass following for my platform, my readership grew because of the shift in content. People found a connection to the words, but did I also give others an opportunity to connect their thoughts to my experiences?
In retrospect, I gave readers work they, too, could relate to and others, a source of entertainment, a chance to offer unwarranted insight, and a sense of entitlement. Once I stopped writing about the events happening behind closed doors, I received emails on what happened thereafter, the status of my partner and I, and inquiries on advice I had no answers to. I gave the world a way in and people felt comfort in staying in my business–a door I ultimately opened myself. I had to live with the decision to expose a troubling point in my relationship, although I could always delete the words as if it never happened. I kept the posts up, but for a while, I had a hard time coming to terms with finding closure in my words and people having access to reopen wounds at their convenience.
So, it’s no surprise to me that more people are finding a need to not fall into the hype of documenting every moment for the world to witness. Not only does disclosing it for a myriad of reasons, but the underlying message is one of “keeping something for yourself,” a sort of rare doing for millennials. Kerry Washington is no stranger to living a life of privacy despite being the star of one of modern-day television’s biggest primetime shows. Her two-and-a-half-year marriage came as a surprise when her marriage certificate was obtained by E! News in a hush-hush ceremony after only a year of dating her husband, Nnamdi Asomugha.
Before their first anniversary, Kerry welcomed baby Isabelle, the couple’s first child together (the birth certificate was obtained by TMZ) and the second child at the end of 2016. Instead of releasing photos to People magazine for a slot on the first cover and a hefty check on the side, the actress has yet to show children to the world.
Related: Kerry Washington: ‘I Didn’t Grow Up Thinking I Was Pretty’
The root of Washington’s desire to separate her private life from her professional one stems from a 2013 interview with Glamour where the star pinpoints the exact moment she deviated from the norm of opening up about her relationship.
Glamour: “OK, so relationships. In interview after interview, you always use the same phrase: ‘I don’t talk about my personal life.’ I’m curious about the discipline that it requires to be so tight-lipped.”KW: “I learned through experience that it doesn’t work for me to talk about my personal life. I’ve had earlier times in my career when I did talk about it. I was on the cover of a bridal magazine [InStyle Weddings, in 2005, when Washington was engaged to actor David Moscow]. But I couldn’t just turn around and say, “I only want to talk about the good stuff, but not the bad stuff.” So I just thought, OK, no more.”
Glamour: “You even managed to get married in June without anyone knowing.”
KW: “Absolutely! I’m walking around in the world with my ring. And when people say congratulations, I say thank you. But I’m going to continue to not talk about it and just let it unfold.”
Glamour: “It must have been satisfying to pull off a wedding with no press around.”
KW: [Laughs.] “I don’t want to sound smug about it…but the point is to do what’s best for me. I have girlfriends in this business who talk about their personal lives, and it works for them, and I love it. But not for me.”
Maybe it’s a fear of failure in the public eye or maybe it’s not wanting your child to grow up reading salacious headlines in tabloids on affairs that should have never left the four corners of your home. Either way, Washington’s personal decision to let the masses play the guessing game on her union to Asomugha is the epitome of mastering the art of discretion for all of the right reasons. She is barely photographed with him.
Read: Don’t Share Your ‘New Bae’ with Social Media for 180 Days
At an SXSW appearance earlier this year, Kerry sort of addressed the year-long rumor that her marriage is on the rocks by reiterating her stance on keeping mum.
“I think—and this is something Reese Witherspoon has talked about a lot—it’s a little different for me because I don’t talk about my personal life. Social media has actually been great for [other celebrities’] relationships with the weeklies or the gossip sites because people say things and they say, ‘That’s not true! Just so you know, that’s BS!’...So I’m thinking in some ways, it’s been great because people are able to maintain their voice. If I don’t talk about my personal life, it means I don't talk about my personal life. That means not only did I not tell you when I was getting married, it also means if somebody has rumors about what's going on in my marriage, I don’t refute them, because I don't talk about my personal life.”
It’s a lesson learned for anyone who has joined the wave of oversharing in today’s world, but that’s not to say that the desire to upload a photo or two doesn’t create a huge pressure for celebrities in particular who feel permitted to share with the very people that support their work, eventually sharing the intimate portions of their everyday lives–hey, Beyoncé. Bey was always known as a mysterious force in the entertainment biz once she began her relationship with Jay-Z and the addition of Blue Ivy heightened the media’s need to get the inside scoop on Beyoncé’s life.
Hearing Baby Blue for the first time on “Glory” and seeing her on the singer’s Tumblr page (where the Carters shared the message, “We welcome to share in our joy. Thank you for respecting our privacy during this beautiful time in our lives.”) introduced us to a never-seen-before Bey. Fortunately for fans, the world has watched Blue grow up through personal photography shared by her mother and auntie on social media. But while sharing her greatest accomplishment with a harsh world has introduced us to Beyoncé shedding more layers and exposing who she is outside of the performance realm, some mothers like Kerry Washington find a hard time allowing the world into that private part of their lives.
Related: Are Celebrity Children Safe From Cyber Bullying?
On that same panel discussion for SXSW, Mrs. Washington tackled the importance of her child being able to make decisions of her own and I had to agree with her perspective behind her why.
“It’s like I have these itchy fingers where I want to just show my daughter because she’s so cute and instead I like, send it to my shrink or send it to my mother. I’m like, ‘Look at this picture! Look how cute, look at this picture!’ Get it out of my phone into the world, but not on social. So I get the desire to do that, but I want her to make her own decisions in her time and I feel like she already has a lot to navigate in life being the daughter of an actor and a former football player that she has a lot going on, so she should be able to enter this world when it feels right for her and not make that decision for her. Who knows that the next generation of Snapchat will be when she’s allowed to have a phone, you know? Who knows?”
As a parent, I can appreciate KW’s decision to hold out on showing off her daughter and passing that power off in Isabelle’s hands. How many of us are making decisions for ourselves and not for others who will, in turn, feel obliged in weighing in on the intricate and intimate moments of our lives?
Whether you’re a personal blogger like myself, an average Joe and Jane simply uploading random snapshots of your life online, or a celebrity seeking to prove a normal life like the rest of us, the truth is there is always room for judgment when divvying parts of your life up for an audience. Everyone’s a critic and sometimes allowing the unknown in causes us to feel like something’s bound to go wrong at some point. Truth be told, some people are actually banking on it.
Just keep your business out of it.
Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney & Jill Marie Jones On 'Games Women Play' & Dating Over 40
What do you get when you mix unfiltered truths, high-stakes romance, and a few well-timed one-liners? You get Games Women Play—the sizzling new stage play by Je’Caryous Johnson that’s part relationship rollercoaster, part grown-woman group chat.
With a powerhouse cast that includes Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney, Jill Marie Jones, Carl Payne, Chico Bean, and Brian J. White, the play dives headfirst into the messy, hilarious, and heart-wrenching games people play for love, power, and peace of mind. And the women leading this story? They’re bringing their whole selves to the stage—and leaving nothing behind.
From Script to Spotlight
The road to Games Women Play started over 20 years ago—literally.
“This script was written 20 years ago,” Jill Marie Jones said with a smile. “It was originally called Men, Money & Gold Diggers, and I was in the film version. So when Je’Caryous called me to bring it to the stage, I was like, ‘Let’s go.’” Now reimagined for 2025, the play is updated with sharp dialogue and modern relationship dynamics that feel all too real.
Demetria McKinney, no stranger to Je’Caryous Johnson’s productions, jumped at the opportunity to join the cast once again. “This is my third time working with him,” she shared. “It was an opportunity to stretch. I’d never been directed by Carl Payne before, and the chance to work with talent I admire—Jill, Claudia, Chico—it was a no-brainer.”
Claudia Jordan joked that she originally saw the role as just another check. “I didn’t take it that seriously at first,” she admitted. “But this is my first full-on tour—and now I’ve got a whole new respect for how hard people work in theater. This ain’t easy.”
Modern Love, Stage Left
The play doesn’t hold back when it comes to the messier parts of love. One jaw-dropping moment comes when a live podcast proposal flips into a prenup bombshell—leaving the audience (and the characters) gasping.
Demetria broke it down with honesty. “People don’t ask the real questions when they date. Like, ‘Do you want kids? How do you feel about money?’ These convos aren’t happening, and then everyone’s confused. That moment in the play—it’s real. That happens all the time.”
Jill chimed in, noting how the play speaks to emotional disconnect. “We’re giving each other different tokens of love. Men might offer security and money. Women, we’re giving our hearts. But there’s a disconnect—and that’s where things fall apart.”
And then Claudia, of course, took it all the way there. “These men don’t even want to sign our prenups now!” she laughed. “They want to live the soft life, too. Wearing units, gloss, getting their brows done. We can’t have nothing! Y’all want to be like us? Then get a damn period and go through menopause.”
Dating Over 40: “You Better Come Correct”
When the conversation turned to real-life relationships, all three women lit up. Their experiences dating in their 40s and 50s have given them both clarity—and zero tolerance for games.
“I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt,” said Jill, who proudly turned 50 in January. “I say what I want. I mean what I say. I’m inside my woman, and I’m not apologizing for it.”
Demetria added that dating now comes with deeper self-awareness. “Anybody in my life is there because I want them there. I’ve worked hard to need nobody. But I’m open to love—as long as you keep doing what got me there in the first place.”
For Claudia, the bar is high—and the peace is priceless. “I’ve worked hard for my peace,” she said. “I’m not dating for food. I’m dating because I want to spend time with you. And honestly, if being with you isn’t better than being alone with my candles and fountains and cats? Then no thanks.”
Channeling Strength & Icon Status
Each actress brings something different to the play—but all of them deliver.
“I actually wish I could be messier on stage,” Claudia joked. “But I think about my grandmother—she was born in 1929, couldn’t even vote or buy a house without a man, and didn’t give a damn. She was fearless. That’s where my strength comes from.”
For Jill, the comparisons to her iconic Girlfriends character Toni Childs aren’t far off—but this role gave her a chance to dig deeper. “If you really understood Toni, you’d see how layered she was. And Paisley is the same—misunderstood, but strong. There’s more to her than people see at first glance.”
Demetria, who juggles singing and acting seamlessly, shared that live theater pushes her in a new way. “Every moment on stage counts. You can’t redo anything. It’s a different kind of love and discipline. You have to give the performance away—live, in the moment—and trust that it lands.”
Laughter, Lessons & Black Girl Gems
The show has plenty of laugh-out-loud moments—and the cast isn’t shy about who steals scenes.
“Chico Bean gets a lot of gasps and laughs,” Claudia said. “And Naomi Booker? Every scene she’s in—she’s hilarious.”
But the play isn’t just about humor. It leaves space for reflection—especially for Black women.
“I hope we get back to the foundation of love and communication,” said Demetria. “A lot of us are in protector mode. But that’s turned into survival mode. We’ve lost softness. We’ve lost connection.”
Claudia agreed. “We’re doing it all—but it’s not because we want to be strong all the time. It’s because we have to be. And I just want women to know: You can have peace, you can be soft. But stop bringing your old pain into new love. Don’t let past heartbreak build walls so high that the right person can’t climb over.”
Final Act: Pack the House
If there’s one thing this cast agrees on, it’s that this play isn’t just entertainment—it’s necessary.
“Atlanta is the Black entertainment hub,” Claudia said. “We need y’all to show up for this play. Support the arts. Support each other. Because when we pack the house, we make space for more stories like this.”
Games Women Play is more than a play—it’s a mirror. You’ll see yourself, your friends, your exes, and maybe even your next chapter. So get ready to laugh, reflect, and maybe even heal—because the games are on.
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If you’re anything like me, you eat up horoscopes, Myers-Briggs, and any other tool out there to learn more about yourself. So when a girlfriend first put me on to human design as “a new personality tool" to tap into, I instantly jumped on it and then fell right off. Truth be told, I did not like my results! But more than that, I didn’t understand it. It wasn’t until I started getting flooded with posts (shout out to social media algorithms) about human design that I decided to give it another chance.
At the top of 2022, I started diving deeper into human design and used it to harness my energy, avoid burnout, and attract aligned opportunities to my life. And, honestly, it has been life-changing! So let’s get into it!
While other self-discovery tools may help us understand how we are, human design can help us understand our core energy power and how we can optimize it to be who we are meant to be. The practice combines aspects of Astrology, numerology, Kabbalah, chakras, and I Ching to create a blueprint unique to each individual.
At its core, human design is based on the understanding that individuals are composed of nine energy centers or chakras, which are all interconnected. These centers influence various aspects of our lives, including relationships, career choices, health, and emotions. By understanding our personal energy centers, we can begin to recognize patterns within our lives that may no longer serve us and make informed decisions about changes we would like to make to create more balance and harmony. What’s not to love?
Well, while all of that sounds great, let’s get back to my main point: I really didn’t understand what any of that meant when I first looked up human design. If that’s you right now, I’ll break it down for you below.
Finding Your Human Design Type
Human design is based on five distinct energy types: Generators, Manifestors, Projectors, Reflectors, and Manifesting Generators. Each type brings a unique set of gifts and challenges, but all require a conscious approach to channeling one’s power to be successful.
You can quickly search human design calculator to find your type. All you’ll need is your date, time, and place of birth.
Now I will need you to get that time of birth precisely right because I fumbled mine by a few minutes and got a completely different type. (If you’re not sure when you were born, it’s time to call your mama!)
When you get your chart, it will say several things, but today, we will focus on each type’s strategy (how to align with your type’s unique power) and not-self theme (how you’ll know you’re not in alignment with your strategy).
The Five Human Design Types
1. Generators
We’re kicking it off with Generators because it’s likely that you are one. They make up about 70% of the planet (including manifesting generators); as the name implies, these folks have undeniable energy. They are the busy bees of the world and were made to build.
If you’re a Generator, your strategy is to respond, not to initiate! That can feel confusing because we usually hear we should go out and chase what we want. But you have a unique way you should go about it.
When looking at a human design chart, Generators will always have a defined sacral center. This gives you the capacity to generate energy for life and work. Your strategy to respond also means that you need to trust your intuition. Instead of chasing after any and everything because you can, you need to use your intuition and your endless supply of energy “to respond” to those opportunities that light you up.
Check your chart for your “authority,” which will give you deeper insight into your decision-making process.
And trust me, opportunities will come left and right because being a Generator means you have an open and enveloping aura constantly pulling life towards you.
When you ignore the above by initiating or chasing opportunities instead of responding, not checking in with your authority, and choosing opportunities that are just “okay,” you will activate your not-self theme of frustration, feeling “stuck,” and you can even end up quitting.
When a Generator lives in alignment with their human design, they will experience their signature: satisfaction.
2. Manifesting Generators
Manifesting Generators are part of that 70% of generators in the world. And much of what is true for a Generator is true for a Manifesting Generator. Similar to pure Generators, Manifesting Generators respond to life through their defined sacral center before initiating and they utilize a strategy of waiting to respond before initiating energy.
The difference between Generators and Manifesting Generators is that Manifesting Generators are designed to move from responding to initiating quickly—basically, they go in hot! For this reason, you can sometimes seem restless or impatient as your human design type is coupled with the desire to act even though there is an intrinsic need to wait.
But just like that spark can burst into a flame that will get you going on your next project, it can quickly burn out when it’s not the right project. So once again, tune in to your authority and respond to the right opportunities.
When a Manifesting Generator lives in alignment with their human design, they will experience their signature: freedom.
3. Manifestors
Don’t shoot the messenger, but, Manifestors are the only ones that should be initiating. These folks make up about 9% of the world and are here to get things started! They are innovative, thriving off freedom and autonomy.
The unique Manifestor magic is in their strategy to inform. Not everyone's ready to handle a Manifestor's powerful impact. Your aura is naturally closed-off and repelling, which can be intimidating for some. Some folks may feel energetically off around a Manifestor and not even understand why. Others may perceive a Manifestor as arrogant.
But because you have a defined throat center in your chart, you are very influential when you speak. Opening up and informing other types about your big plans can relax the energy around you, allowing you to initiate in peace. While you may be tempted to move in silence, you’re not a sacral being like the Generators and may not have the energy to carry out your big plans.
Manifestors are among the types that are recommended to work less than 6 hours a day. Not only may you need to get buy-in for your plans, but not informing can set off your not-self theme anger which will only increase the resistance to your plans.
When Manifestor lives in alignment with their human design, they will experience their signature: peace.
4. Projectors
Now, remember how I told you to make sure you got the time right when calculating your type? Well, I first got a Manifestor, which is so dope, right? I’m the ONLY type that gets to initiate? Heck yes! Welp, I ended up being a Projector, and it turns out that instead of being able to initiate, my strategy was to…wait for an invitation? I was confused and lowkey disappointed, but now I get it!
To all my Projectors, we make up about 20% of the world. We are the seers and guides of society. We have an absorbing and penetrating aura that allows us to see deeply into people and things in a way that no other type can, so it’s easy for us to bring ideas to life by directing energy and helping others reach their potential. That’s why we make such fantastic leaders, guides, and advisors.
Our strategy is to wait for the invitation. While we may so easily see the inefficiencies at work or the incompatibility of our friend’s relationship, when we are not recognized and invited in to offer our two cents, we can quickly be hit with a “who asked you?” or worse, we are ignored.
Especially regarding careers, relationships, and big moves, we need to be recognized for our strengths and invited in to share more of them. That means we do not go out chasing opportunities, but instead, we work on embodying the kind of person invited to the opportunities we want and placing ourselves to be seen and recognized. Start tuning in. What are folks always telling you you’re good at, thanking you for, or telling you you should do? Those are already invitations for you from life.
This is hard because every message about success tells us to do the opposite. But what happens when you don’t do this? When you try to force things, and they inevitably don’t go as planned? We activate our not-self theme of bitterness.
But here’s the good news, when a Projector lives in alignment with their human design, they will experience their signature: success.
5. Reflectors
Finally, we have the rarest of them all! Reflectors comprise just one percent of the population and are the ultimate chameleons. Reflectors have a unique ability to observe and discern their environment in profound ways, deeply understanding the people, places, and energy around them.
They don’t have defined centers, so they can both accurately reflect their observations and easily become influenced by outside energy sources. Because of this, their strategy is to wait a lunar cycle before making decisions.
Reflectors must use this innate sensitivity to carefully choose who they spend time with, investing in those who feel elevating and expansive while avoiding anything toxic or draining.
Additionally, solo time is fundamental for Reflectors so they can take the necessary breaks from absorbing others’ energies and reset.
When a reflector lives in alignment with their human design, they will experience their signature: harmony.
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Featured image by Diana Simumpande on Unsplash
Originally published on February 6, 2023